You have put in the hard work to grasp his attention. You’ve gone to the bar, put your best stiletto-clad foot forward and turned your flirt gauge to its full force. He’s definitely interested- he can hardly keep his hands off you. Yet, once the night is over and you’ve used up your acceptable number of winks and pick-up lines, there’s something still sizzling in the depths of that fiery connection you’ve just created. Great! But now he’s looking at you in a way that knocks you off your feet and you don’t want to end things here.
So, it’s make or break time. Are you looking for some midnight fun, or something much deeper? Getting his attention was easy- you know how good you look and you’ve been leaning into him just enough to get a sense of that expensive perfume you spritzed on for this moment. But now it’s time to see just how far this connection can stretch. The flirting is fun and dates are divine- nevertheless, it’s easy to let your nerves get the better of you.
There is a reason you have already grasped his attention. The punch-line, however, is to hold onto it long enough for him to see just how incredible you really are. Men are from Mars, but that doesn’t mean us Venus gals don’t have some simmering tricks up our sleeves to adapt to their environment.
Let’s be real here; if you weren’t already intriguing to him, he wouldn’t have stuck around in the first place. So, why change that charming nature of yours now that you’ve got his attention? Staying genuine will go a lot further than you think! Men, as simple as they are, can spot a fake personality the moment they talk to you- which is something that immediately categorizes you into lust material instead of something deeper. Stick to what you know and don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. He’ll appreciate the frankness in you and want to trust your character because of it! Besides, nobody wants to be adored for misconstrued reasons. You want him to obsess over the real you, and not a fake version of yourself.
An issue that occurs in too many relationships is the comfortability that can sometimes override the rest of the important aspects to sustain a man’s interests. If you think back to when you first met each other, that spark, that throat-tearing, pulse raging, insanely intimate feeling in your chest- that you felt locking eyes with him isn’t something that’s supposed to fade overtime. Guys like tThere is certainly nothing wrong with being comfortable in front of your man, but you don’t want to lose that promiscuous edge that grasped his attention at the beginning. If you keep it flirty, don’t let that excitement wither and remind him just how teasingly sexy you can be, that spark will keep him addicted to you. Plus guys love feeling important, and flirting is exactly the way to make them feel that.
When you express high expectations for a man or the exclusive companionship that you’re ultimately looking for, it puts an extreme amount of pressure on him to meet those prospects. For some, this is a challenge to secure what is his and he will be ready to dive head first into something deep and meaningful. For the majority, however, they appreciate the simplicity in a woman and will make the move when he feels the time is right. Don’t feel the need to rush things just to put a label on whatever it is you want. If its meant to be, the connection will flourish naturally. Love and relationships isn’t something that should be forced or fast-tracked- enjoy what is in front of you and trust that if he really is the one you’ve been waiting for, everything will simply fall into place.
Just as much as a man struggles with initial high expectations, what is more stressing is not knowing where he stands with you. Communication is something that will make or break any connection and if you want to keep his attention, make sure he knows what your end goal is with him. Now, this isn’t saying that you should devote your time telling him how you want to bear his children someday. Please, don’t do that! However, in times where you are enjoying yourself with him or those butterflies are fluttering rapidly in your stomach, let him know! A simple “I’m having a great time with you” will let him know that you genuinely appreciate his company and he’ll take that as an opening to let those giddy sensations bloom.
If you’re looking for a foolproof way to sustain a man’s attention, keep him on his toes. When people connect with those who are fearless both emotionally and in their lifestyles, it creates a pull on us to want to live the same way. It’s human nature to want more out of life, so those daring ambitions are what can make a person an addiction. So, if you want him to stick around, be daring enough to steer clear from becoming predictable. Go on spontaneous dates, kiss him when he least expects it and suggest impulsive adventures in the most mundane circumstances. Drive is a powerful tool- so let your unwavering needs be known to your man and he will always be waiting eagerly to see what you will do next.
Without intentionally glorifying the notion of “bro-code”, it really is important for a man to know that you can get along with those he cares about. The Spice Girls said it for us, now it’s time to give back exactly what we expect from our potential companions. Putting in effort to get to know his friends not only shows him that you’re serious, but also gives him the idea that its not going to be difficult for you to fit into his current lifestyle. It is uncomfortable for anyone to feel the need to choose between their friends or their partners- so when you put in the time to get to know his friends and become an active part in more than one aspect of his life, it’s going to be hard for him to ignore you.
We all want what we can’t have. For men, when they see that their companion isn’t spending all their time swooning over them, it creates a sense of healthy jealousy and leaves him being able to do nothing except for think about what you’re doing. A mistake that a lot of women make when progressing deeper into relationships is revolving their lives around their man. Not only is this unhealthy for you, but it takes a toll and puts dire pressure on the relationship itself. You need to have a life outside of your relationship. Staying up to date with friends and family, keeping up your hobbies and showing him that he is a part of your world instead being the centre of it will force him to view an even playing ground. He’ll not only respect your independent life, but appreciate the time you spend together even more.
Getting a man excited over your physical attributes is easy. Swing your hips, show off some skin and send over a little wink to get things started. However, it’s the mental stimulation that a lot of us struggle with. Between all of the flirting and laughing and while those fiery nerves are still at full speed, it is often easy to let all logic fly out of the window. This is completely normal during introductions- you don’t want to connect with someone by forcing them to listen to your life story. Although once you become more comfortable and conversations delve into something deeper, this is your perfect opportunity to surprise him with something intellectual or humbling. Satisfying your man mentally is key to sustaining something extraordinary. Looks fade overtime. But if you can get him excited through dialog, his attention is all yours.
Just as much as he wants to see you all dressed up and ready to conquer, showing him your natural side will drive him crazy in the best ways. If you’re the type to go all out when you are hitting the town, allowing someone to see the other side of you creates a sense of trust and proving visually that you’re comfortable with them. A man will see this as your vulnerable side. It’s like taking off a mask and hoping that your knight will appreciate what he sees. Men really do understand this aspect of a woman’s life and will connect with you on such a deeper level when you let your natural beauty flourish. To some, this may seem like a minuscule step in a relationship- nonetheless, a little goes a long way.
Whether it is a heartfelt gift or a random act of physical affection, to sustain the attention of your man, he needs to feel just as appreciated as you do. Just think about how charming it is, receiving a gift from the one you’re swooning over and that giddy feeling of gratitude you get from it. Believe it or not, ladies- men get those exact same feelings. Forget the societal standards and do something intimately special and- dare we say- womanly for him. Cook for him, dress into something promiscuous or buy him that watch he has been eyeing off for months. It is such a rarity for us women to let go of our pride sometimes for the sake of a mans simple pleasures, so surprising him with something as unassuming as wearing matching undergarments will have him fixated on you like moths to a flame.
We could conjure up an entire book on how men work. However, at the end of the day it will always come down to this- boys will be boys. Naturally, men value physical affection over most things in life and a lot of the time, they even rely on physical contact to gauge emotions because of their cliché, masculine habits to not talk about their feelings. For us, that means that body language is one of the most powerful paraphernalia in the dating scene. You can use simple, physical gestures to keep your man’s attention on you. Brushing his arm when you’re near, leaning towards him when you speak or flirting with him through hooded eyes are just some of the simple ways to use your body language to keep him interested.
It is said that you never really know everything about a person in the first two years you meet. While some walls come tumbling down, others you need to piece away in small chunks. With this said, never assume that you know all there is to know about a companion. People change overtime- their aspirations, their hobbies or even just how they enjoy conversing. If you want to keep his attention, make an effort to continue to learn new things about him. Not only will he appreciate your genuine curiosity for his life, but it will push him to want to do more with himself. Taking an interest in the smaller things is what make people become addictive. Its easy to brush aside certain aspects of your life- so when you meet someone that makes those features seem special, it’s hard to ignore those giddy feelings.
A woman who is unapologetic for who she is, is a woman that you can easily fall in love with. With the confidence to embrace your quirks and the humbleness to openly admit that you’re not perfect- it’s the perfect combination for an exciting potential companionship. While it is nice to be swooned over for your femininity or beauty, it is incredible to feel wanted for your deeper qualities. Embracing your quirks isn’t always easy- particularly when you can realize that not everyone will appreciate eccentricity at times. But that is where the catch is! Be unreformed for your quirks and that embracing energy will attract the finest kind of connections. Plus having quirks is what separates you from every other girl out there. Once he realizes how rare and one of a kind you are, he'll be putty in your hands.
He’s seen the softer, more natural side of you and it looks like he is pretty content with what you have brought to the table. But that doesn’t mean that he wouldn’t appreciate seeing you in all of your glory. The most attractive influence you can have over a man is dressing up- putting on that promiscuous dress and swiping some lipstick on your pout- just for him. It’s a primitive need in men to be able to brag about what is theirs and when you give him the chance to see you at your best and express that you did it all for him, he can’t help but go just a little wild. Showing off your sensual side for his exclusive eyes is a tool not to be underestimated.
If you already have his attention, it’s for a reason. Whether it was that smokey eye you rocked on the night you met him, or that contagious energy that’s keeping him on his toes. If a man wasn’t interested in creating something magical from that first connection, he wouldn’t have stuck around until now. You already have what it takes to keep him around if you be yourself. It’s a cliché, but everything happens for a reason. Believe in yourself enough to know that if its meant to be, it will be. Chemistry is a natural occurrence between two people and it’s not something that can be forced. Don’t forget the small things and definitely don’t forget to swoon a little bit, but at the same time just don’t overthink it.