"Life-changing" is what Kylie Jenner said when asked to sum up her 2018 on Keeping Up With The Kardashians.
Stormi Webster arrived on February 4, 2018. By day one, this baby had earmarked her status as the most famous celeb kid around. An Instagram egg may have beaten the record-breaking 16 million likes Stormi's arrival pic received, but nobody's talking about the egg anymore.
"More stamps on her passport than [most people],"– Travis Scott didn't need to tell Rolling Stone that Stormi travels by private jet. Those baby Burberry outfits speak for themselves. In fact, if that Instagram account is showing us anything, it's the #BillionaireStatus that Kylie Jenner has likely reached.
In 2018, Forbes put Kylie's net worth at $900 million. Kylie Cosmetics is flying off shelves. @mycalvins likely came with a giant price tag. If we sat here and listed all the ways that Kylie Jenner earns money, we'd run out of space.
What everyone wants to know, though, is what goes on behind closed doors. Stormi isn't giving interviews yet, but we know a fair amount. Here are 14 things Kylie's billionaire baby isn't allowed to do (plus 7 that are A-okay).
21 Forget Flat-Screens, TV Is "Out"
If Kylie Jenner has made anything clear, it's that price tags aren't a problem. Life came with a #Luxury while Kylie was still in her teens, but Stormi's luxuries have their limits. Travis Scott made it all clear to Rolling Stone.
"Today kids are on iPads. There's so much technology, they don't play outside anymore. With Stormi – no TV. That TV [stuff] is out."
This gets pretty interesting when you compare Kim and Kourtney's philosophies. While Kourt is considered lax (and Kim is considered strict), both sisters allow their kids screen time. Stormi? Well, she's got Lip Kits to play with!
20 Except Backstage: A Private Room In Every Venue
Seeing Kylie creep around the backstage corridors of Travis' Astroworld tour gave us something pretty unusual – Kylie looking almost normie in a black puffer jacket and hat (and carrying her baby around like any of us would with our own).
"We don't let her out because of how loud it is back there, so she usually stays backstage and watches," Kylie said on the Snapchat.
The proof was in the pudding with a video that may be the most adorable thing we've ever seen. Stormi is seen watching her dad perform live (then giggling with glee). Kylie revealed that Stormi has a private room in every venue (and we've seen the Fritos inside).
19 Not Allowed Near Anyone's Phone But Kylie's
The Kardashian-Jenners have ushered in a new style of communication with the outside world. It's called doing it by smartphone. Kim, Khloe, and Kourtney all do it, but Kylie sets stricter limits.
Handing over phones to security is protocol. People snapping is "really, really stressful."
After a KUWTK episode showed a staff member secretly attempting to snap Kylie while she was pregnant, Kris Jenner told viewers, "To have somebody in her own home trying to snap pictures they shouldn’t be snapping is really, really stressful. You want to be able to trust the people that you’re surrounded by, but we have to really be on alert at all time." Stormi isn't allowed near other peoples' phones, as Baby Gaga reports.
18 A "Team Of Nannies And Assistants," Stormi Isn't Normie
To be fair, Stormi does seem to tag along with Kylie as much as possible. She's backstage at Astroworld with her mom, she just got a luxury Turks & Caicos vacation with Kylie, and that Christmas Eve party got cut short because of bath time.
Don't think the nannies aren't there, though. "A team of nannies and assistants" are what Cosmo report to be Kylie's hired entourage – being "with the caretaker" while Kylie waited for Travis is also something Rolling Stone noted about Stormi.
"I actually enjoy changing diapers. It's really satisfying. To make her clean again," Kylie told Kim via ES. Change diapers from time to time she might, but Kylie is relying on nannies. A normie life isn't on the cards for Stormi.
17 $10 Million Signatures To Get Anywhere Near Stormi
Security in this family is no joke. Complex reports "Secret Service-style maneuvers" as Travis hires staff for dressing room sweeps and emergency escape routes. Daily Mail reports strict measures to get anywhere near Stormi.
A person caught selling stories or pics of Stormi can face up to $10 million in legal fees. "If they don't sign the agreement, they can't see her."
This figure matches Daily Mail's report of Kim and Kanye's non-disclosure agreements, alongside the waivers guests had to sign at their wedding. Casually walking up to a stranger just isn't a reality for Stormi.
16 No Contact With Germs: Medical Masks Or "Thank U, Next"
While Kim lets her kids run around outdoors (and pick up other peoples' germs at Disneyland), Kylie is said to be beyond stringent when it comes to hygiene around Stormi.
"Kylie got boxes of medical masks for people to wear around Stormi because she doesn’t want her exposed to any germs, she’s still so brand new,"
Hollywood Life reports. Hand-washing and sanitizing have also been reported The Daily Mail as a strict enforcement policy – visitors to the house are asked to wash their hands by Kylie. Stormi might interact with Louis Vuitton, but germs are off-limits.
15 Waiting 10 Months To Go To The Park
Everyone was pretty taken aback by Kylie's December 2018 Instagram post. The lighting wasn't great, but we could just about see Stormi sitting on a picnic blanket with Kylie's BFF, Jordyn Woods. "First trip to the park" was the caption.
Most babies wind up at the park in the first few months of their life. If they aren't old enough to walk, they'll still go in the stroller – it's just what you do.
Stormi may now be permitted to frequent (suspiciously empty-looking) parks, but she waited 10 months to do it. Playing in normie zones clearly isn't a privilege this kid is seeing much of.
14 But $12,500 Fendi Came In Two Months
You don't wait long for the #Designer when Kylie Jenner is your mother. Stormi made her #DesignerDebut with her very first joint mommy-and-daughter Instagram pic. The $820 Gucci baby sling wasn't missed by This Is Insider, although that was just the tip of the iceberg.
"Stormi strolls" came with one Fendi dress (and one, matching Fendi stroller). Those custom-made wheels cost $12,500.
While the caption to this 2018 pic was witty, it was the $12,500 price tag that made People's headlines. The magazine reports that the stroller was custom-designed (although we wouldn't expect anything less). Fendi perks at two months old for this kid.
13 Even On Tour, Stormi "Pulls Up"
Something about the Kardashian lifestyle suggests a lot of lounging around. Kim and Khloe seem to spend their lives chilling poolside on KUWTK (and the kids aren't far behind). Stormi may have joined Kylie on dazzling-white Caribbean sands recently, but don't think she doesn't have duties.
"Even with me on tour, Stormi pulls up. She’ll travel. She got more stamps on her passport than a lot of [people],"
Travis told Rolling Stone in December 2018. Stormi hasn't spent the first year of her life rolling around a Versace playmat. She's on tour with her dad (and that's before we get to what she's doing for her mom).
12 And It's Private Jets Or The Highway
The Internet didn't know what to make of this pic. Seriously, where to start? Are we going to allocate 100% of our gushing to the baby pink outift (or are we going to get real and question the whole private jet thing)?
Kylie has been traveling by private jet for more years than we can count. Back before Stormi was born, it was joining the sisters with Popeye's fried chicken – this family can't seem to fly without it.
With wood-paneled and leather interiors, those private jets are high-end as it gets. You might not know Stormi's exact whereabouts right now, but rest assured, this kid isn't riding the subway.
11 Less Mommy Time Than You'd Think
"I can't wait till she can come everywhere with me," Kylie told Kim when the sisters interviewed each other for ES. Kylie isn't alone in having trouble leaving her baby – Cardi B is still refusing to get a nanny, according to Ellen, and she can't even leave Kulture to do her hair.
Read Travis' Rolling Stone interview carefully though, and you'll notice something interesting. The magazine outlines Kylie's silk pantsuit, but it also outlines Kylie "waiting" for Travis in a "chauffeured Escalade." Stormi is "with a caretaker."
Time spreads thin when you're running an empire. Kylie may wish that Stormi is 100% by her side, but the reality is Stormi spending a lot less time with her mom than she might like.
10 Promoting Kylie Cosmetics, #AlreadyOnTheJob
It's when the baby is cute beyond words that all questions of morals go out the window. Well, unless you're willing to tear your eyes away from that Kylie Cosmetics video of Stormi.
"Kylie...Cosmetics. Kylie...Cosmetics." Kylie is trying to teach Stormi some new words in this Instagram video. Tens of millions of us watched this toddler hold a Kylie Cosmetics kit before giggling and saying: "Dada."
It was the best promo ever. We sat there, completely besotted with Stormi (and Kylie Cosmetics got a "cha-ching"). Stormi isn't even one year old. She's already got a full-time job, though.
9 But Mini Louis Vuitton Works Just Fine
Come to think of it, there was a bit of a wait for this Louis Vuitton moment. In January 2019, Kim handed out $9,000 worth of Louis Vuitton bags from her Japan trip (which was in early 2018). Fox News reports "all" of Kim's daughters and nieces getting matching Nano Speedy bags.
"OMG this girl threw the bag over her shoulder, I can't" was Kylie's caption to this video on Instagram. Stormi sees the Louis Vuitton, gets super excited, and reaches out for it.
It isn't until Stormi stylishly holds the bag over her shoulder that Kylie just loses it, though. Watch it, and you'll see why. Louis Vuitton perks? Absolutely allowed.
8 Best Not Interfere With Those Nails
Kylie's nails managed to get both a #Envy and a #Controversial in 2018. While girls across the globe ogled at this girl's glam-squad-perfect French tips, Ms. Jenner found herself under fire for being a mother with the world's most perfect nails.
"Ain’t no way she’s changing diapers with those [long] acrylics," Hollywood Life quoted as one social media response. Kylie found herself slammed by comments questioning how those diapers would get changed (while the nails stayed so perfect).
While the IG videos of Kylie and Stormi show the best #Bond ever, we'll consider it safe to assume that Stormi needs to watch out – you don't interfere with Kylie Jenner's nails.
7 Best Keep Out Of Sight
Here's how it used to go. Celebs would rent out top-tier hotel suites, they'd arrive by limousine, and the most we'd see of the kids would be them stepping into The Plaza. Stormi comes in the #Extra package.
"She is very attached to Stormi. She honestly just never wants to leave her out of her sight not because she can't trust anyone, but because she just is so happy being with her baby,"
E Online reported. The paparazzi might have caught Kylie off-guard here, but remember that there still isn't a single picture of Stormi that hasn't been #KylieApproved. This kid comes with a rule. You stay out of sight.
6 Already Got Her Own Squad
#SquadGoals used to be reserved for the likes of Taylor Swift, Gigi Hadid, and the adult KarJenners. That all changed with the 2018 arrival of three new KarJenner babies. Stormi, Chicago, and True were all born in the first half of 2018. They're already the biggest squad around.
"The triplets" was Kim's caption to this pic of Stormi hanging with her baby squad. They're stylish, they're cute, they're covered in pink, and we can't deal.
Stormi will likely grow up home-schooled. While playground playmates are unlikely to be a reality, having a squad has already been taken care of.
5 Stormi's Hermès Birkin Has Already Been Picked Out
Her $900 million will get her some perks. The $1 million worth of designer bags filling Kylie's purse closet was covered in great detail by Elle, although Kylie can speak for herself. Speak she did during a Snapchat tour of the room that holds her treasured possessions.
"I made a little room for them in my house." Kylie then revealed that Stormi's first bag will be a Hermès Birkin. Retail price: $50,000 minimum.
"This one I'm definitely going to let Stormi wear probably when she says, 'Mommy I want to carry a purse,' so this is probably going to be her first purse," Kylie said, pointing to the Hermès row.
4 "OG 3's I See You Mama," #Nike
Kardashian closets come in two forms. #1 Super-glam, custom-made Versace. #2 Super-slouchy, comfy sweats (that are mostly Yeezy). Travis Scott has actually designed a Nike shoe, so it's no surprise that his little girl is already toting Nike footwear.
“We about to be walking soon,” Travis wrote to accompany an Instagram story of a growing Stormi, before adding: “OG 3's I see you mama."
This guy talks with the same amount of swag his ultra-slick wardrobe has. Stormi is, indeed, wearing Nike Air Jordans. We'll assume they were customized, too. #NikePerks
3 A Room With A View (Talk About A Vacay)
In 2019, something unusual popped up on Kylie Jenner's Instagram. It wasn't a selfie or a new car. In fact, the pic didn't even show Kylie. With an accompanying 360-degree video showing what looked like an entire resort booked out, Kylie was sharing the #VacayVibes.
"Let the birthday adventures begin" was a later caption as we learned that Stormi was #LivingItUp with Kylie. Harper's Bazaar reports Turks & Caicos as the location.
Infinity pools. Swaying palms. Rainfall showers. Giant #Beachfront. Stormi is staying in a room with a view, and that's one perk this little kid is getting plenty of.
2 Style Before Comfort
Christmas 2018 feels like a year ago. The holidays might be over, but the pics are still there. Celebrating in style is what we expect from the KarJenner clan (and they definitely delivered).
Kylie joined her sisters for Christmas Eve in a stunning, floor-length gown. The crystals didn't stop there, though. Stormi came as the second half of this #DuoAct, although one thing springs to mind, here.
Crystal-studded onesies might look glam, but it's definitely style over comfort. "Leaving the party early to go give my baby a bath" was Kylie's #Motherhood reminder, but the pics didn't look too comfortable.
1 "Don't Grow Up!"
Clearly, Kylie was kidding here – or was she? In late 2018, Kylie posted a video to social media showing Stormi's progress. This little munchkin is walking, she's babbling away, and yes, we know it's Stormi – fans will spot the Gucci in the background.
"You're standing all on your own?! Don't grow up!" Kylie says to Stormi.
This isn't one that Kylie can control. Stormi turns one in February. Still, if you're listening to mommy's words, that's an instruction. Stormi: Stay cute, stay small, and don't grow up!
Sources: Harper's Bazaar, Cosmopolitan