Breakups. They suck. It doesn't matter who's doing the breakup - if you're being broken up with or if you're breaking the bad news, it's hard on everyone. The longer you're with someone, the more intense the relationship is, the harder breakups tend to be. And that makes sense, because your lives become so intertwined. You have the same friends, you've met each other's parents...you even got a dog together. Or something like that. At any rate, breakups just. Plain. Suck.
You know what sucks worse than a breakup? When you breakup and you want your ex back. It doesn't matter when end you're on - whether you're doing the breaking up or you've been broken up with, if you want your ex back, it's absolute torture. Sometimes you get lucky and you and your ex come back together under great circumstances and everything seems to fall into place. Maybe you can look past the problems that drove you apart and you can work through whatever it was that upset you both. Sometimes that happens, and plenty of couples can attest to this fact. Maybe it's just meant to be, right?
But how does that even happen, right? Like how do people even get back with their exes? Is that possible? Is there a secret or something?
We don't think there's a secret per se, but we have some advice based on his zodiac sign. Because, you know, different signs react to things differently. No two signs are the same, and no two approaches to getting back your ex should be either! And if Kate Middleton can do it, so can you, right? So read on, take notes, and good luck!
12 Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)
Your Aquarius man wants to be free to do as he pleases. It may have been one of the reasons you broke up in the first place, honestly, but that's neither here nor there. But it's that freedom that he craves, and now that you're no longer with him, it's that freedom that he has. Since that's kind of his thing, it's gonna be a hard thing to convince him to give up and go right back to how things were.
So how to get him back? Well, for one, it doesn't matter what your man's Zodiac sign is, nothing should go back to being exactly the same, because that would just...you know, result in the same problems and then result in another break up. But if you want something you can actively work on to get him back, reassure him that he'll have more "him" time and that this relationship can breathe a little. Bonus points if you don't text him back within a week or so of breaking up, because the more time he has to think, the more time he has to miss you (and realize his mistake).
11 Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
Is your ex a Pisces? You're in luck because chances are good that he already misses you. The Pisces guy is a deep and contemplative soul, and he needs a lot of time to process his emotions. Can we also just say real quick that having emotions doesn't mean weak? It's okay for a guy to have emotions, and this one happens to have them in spades.
Since a lot of Pisces guys tend to be creative, he'll probably be working his feelings out through writing, music, or art. So give him some time to process things (but not too much time) and then approach him to let him know that you want to understand him and work hard at validating his thoughts and feelings. One thing a Pisces guy hates is feeling misunderstood, so by telling him you want to know him better and that you'll actively work on it, he should come around (and maybe with something artistic dedicated to you to show for the time spent apart!).
10 Aries (March 21 – April 19)
Everyone that's ever been with an Aries guy knows that he works hard, wants only the best for himself and his loved ones, and is very, VERY passionate. Many will agree that these traits can be construed as fiery, stubborn, and impatient. But for those that want their Aries man back, they're willing to work with this strong personality and see things through to the end.
So how to get him back? This one probably won't sit well with everyone, but one thing an Aries man loves is to have his way. It's not that he's inherently selfish, per se, but he is just so strong-willed that he can't help but insist that he's always right. If your Aries man is worth it, consider letting him dictate things here and there and letting go on the reigns. If he at least feels like he's in control, he'll feel happier. Don't become a doormat though - as long as your needs are being met, this isn't truly all that bad (and that advice goes for every relationship - get your needs met and you do you!).
9 Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
Your Taurus ex can be sweet and sour - bashful and bullish. He may have come off as a tough guy, but deep down he's a huge softie. So understand that the more he puffs himself up in public to appear like he's a bigger, better man and totally over it, the truth is, he's probably not. Like at all.
This is a tricky one to work with, since they have a dual nature of both tough guy and teddy bear. Trying to appease one risks pissing off the other, but that's the risk you have to take! If he's the kind of guy that is sensitive but gets mad when his needs aren't met, consider going in soft and assuring him that you'll stick by him again no matter what. If he's tough upfront, let him rinse through those feelings a bit and give him some space, then re-engage after some time has passed and he's cooled down. After that, then let him know how much you've missed him and that you'll stay loyal. That should do the trick!
8 Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
Your Gemini ex is a loquacious lad and has probably already talked about you to anyone that will sit still for five minutes. He's not trying to spread rumors about you, deep down (even if it appears that way) - it's just how he works things out. Talking. Like all the time.
But he's also known for another trait, and that's the fear of settling into mediocrity. Routines absolutely terrify him, and it may be the reason why he broke up with you in the first place (if he did the deed).
So the best way to get him back is to do a lot of spontaneous things that look fun and plaster them all over social media (where he can see them). Do this for some time - enough for it to look like a new lifestyle - but don't look like you're completely over him just yet. Drop hints here and there through mutual friends that you wish you had someone to share your new adventures with. Chances are he'll sign up for the next random trip - you'll be able to reconcile over the perfect Instagram and Snapchat photos.
7 Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
Your Cancer ex is probably a pretty nice guy - he's the one that always fixed things when you needed a handy man, and with him gone, you're realizing that you probably forgot how to change a light bulb or unclog a sink. He's always wanted to save the damsel in distress, even if your distress is something as small as a spider. He just needs to feel not only needed, but special - as if he's the only one that can do the job.
If you're the one that did the breaking up, this one is pretty straightforward - come clean about how much you need him and that he fills a unique place in your life that no one else can. If he's the one that broke things off, this one is tough, but not impossible. He probably left because he wasn't feeling appreciated or needed enough, or maybe he felt like he was needed more elsewhere.
Start by taking some bomb selfies and candid photos that show how gorgeous you are and post them on social media. Don't go overboard, but also talk about how you're starting to find success in other parts of your life, like school or work. Then, drop hints through mutual friends that the guy you're dating now (make a dude up, don't actually date a dude to use him to get your ex back) is great, but just isn't...him. It could feed his ego a bit, but it could also reinforce the notion that he's special.
After you're positive he's heard the news about your disappointing dude, meet up with him again (make it seem random or spontaneous). Talk about how great your life is now, but there's just...something missing. A void that you're not sure anyone else but he can fill. Clear any pre-existing problems you had with him and lay it all out there. If he sees that you've tried your absolute best to get your life together but for whatever reason he's the key to making it perfect, the temptation will be too hard for him to resist, and he'll likely take the bait.
6 Leo (July 23 – August 22)
Leos, am I right? They just gotta be the center of attention, and they sure do love a room full of people they haven't met yet (but over the course of the evening they'll know pretty intimately). Your Leo ex was probably a social butterfly - even the introverts seem to know what to say, when to say it. So it should come as no surprise that after your breakup, he's probably out enjoying life somewhere, looking really, really over you.
But after all is said and done at the end of the night, he goes home, goes to bed, and thinks about those fantastic moments he once had with you. Because as much as he loves attention, he loves living in the moment more. Those candid moments you created play back like a movie in his head every night, and the longer he goes without seeing you, the more he remembers.
Wait a week or two, and tease him a little bit with some of your most treasured shared memories. You can either text him "hey, remember when..." or you can post a photo on IG or snapchat something that will jog his memory with a super vague description that only he will get (like an image of a park where you once kissed talking about how you "had good memories here"). You'll be sure to drive him crazy with good moments after some time, so expect a text back after enough moments have piled up.
5 Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
Your Virgo ex is a really interesting guy, and these relationships can be so confusing. When you were at a really low point in your life, your sensible perfectionist Virgo seemed to know exactly how to solve your problems or what to say in order to make you feel better. He was your superhero, and he saved you when you needed it most.
So if he broke up with you, chances are, he's thinking you don't need saving anymore. He can't help it - in the dictionary, "Captain Save-A-Ho" has his photo next to it. He's the knight in shining armor that gets a high out of saving a girl - it's probably why you got together, right? - and he needs to save the day wherever he goes.
Now here's where things get tricky - he may have moved on to save another girl, but he hasn't forgotten that you were once in need. That doesn't mean you play damsel in distress again, as he's too smart and will see right through that. Instead, blow him off for a while. Let him know that he's made a huge mistake. Tough love approach - you won't be friends, you won't talk to him just for the sake of talking, and you're not going to run to Wendy's to get him nuggets anymore. If he texts you, ignore it for the first few times. DEFINITELY don't text right back immediately. Make yourself fairly unavailable. But every once in a while, text him back, making sure your replies are brief and uninformative. Create that space between the two of you. It'll drive him crazy.
Eventually, he'll see the error of his ways and come around, and this time, the relationship will be much, much better since it's not reliant on him "saving" you. Great right?
4 Libra (September 23 – October 22)
Libras in general like to live up to their namesakes and strive for balance in all that they do. They're looking for their missing puzzle piece: someone to complete them. So when your Libra man becomes your Libra ex, chances are he felt you weren't "the one" for him. Small detail, because he doesn't know that you are, in fact, perfect for each other.
To get back your Libra man, you have to first re-evaluate your life. Is there anything that you're doing that is too extreme? Do you obsessively watch TV or something to the point that it harms the relationship? Are you not spending enough time with him? Or maybe too much? Is there anything in your life that you'd benefit from toning down a bit and doing in moderation?
If you answered "yes" at all, try striking that balance in your personal life before reaching out again to him. Wait for a bit to ensure that it's something that you think you can do (not all of us can easily give up our vices or start new hobbies). If you can go a few weeks in this new lifestyle, try texting him again to work things out. Mention you've eliminated the problem that bothered him. Should do the trick!
3 Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
Scorpios are hot, Hot, HOT! Your Scorpio ex is probably no exception - they're just as fiery and passionate as Aries, but with a bit more mystery. Or something. We can't quite put our finger on it, and that's what makes them so undeniably sexy.
One thing that they value above all is...well, value. They don't want a girlfriend, they want a QUEEN. The more successful and powerful you are, the more turned on they are. So channel your inner Beyonce and plaster your successes all over social media. Doesn't matter how big or small the success is - play it up. After a while, he's going to see that you're a high value woman that he really can't afford to lose. His power couple dreams will get the best of him, and he'll be attracted back to you like a boomerang.
2 Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
If your ex is a Sagittarius, this break up might feel really hopeless. Part of your problems with the relationship in the first place was how emotionally distant your ex could be, and he seemed to be only interested in finding someone to sit in the passenger seat as he drives through life. You never truly made plans together - he made the plans. Because he drove. You just tagged along in his life, not the life you created together.
So how do you reach him? Well, stop making yourself so available. If all he's looking for is a companion and you're offering yourself up as that and only that, he'll keep the relationship there. If you lay down the law that you want "this, that, and the other", then he'll understand he's gotta give back as much as he ever got from you. This may take some time, but the wait is usually worth it!
1 Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)
Your Capricorn ex is really good at letting you know when he's been hurt; in fact, you're probably aware of the exact reasons why you broke up because he wouldn't stop telling you about everything he feels you did. Most of it boils down to feeling betrayed, but there might be a few surprises here and there that you didn't know much about.
So for this guy, give him some space to rinse through his feelings, but not too much time so that they solidify. When we say space, don't talk to him. Like at all. Do this for a few days depending on how much he tries to contact you - the more often he tries to talk to you, the less space he needs. Remember, letting his imagination running away from him is bad, but letting him try to re-engage with you on his own is good.
After you start a new conversation post-breakup, tell him openly and honestly that you've thought about his needs and how you acknowledge them. You don't necessarily have to apologize (because it's totally possible he's done his fair share), but just making his feel like his feelings are valid will give him hope that he's going to be listened to. That should be enough to get his guard down and begin the healing process - at that point, it's your call on what you do next, so long as you keep in mind that listening to him and acknowledging his feelings are key!