Whether you look forward to the holiday season, dread it, are choosing to participate but not buy gifts, or already have a Christmas tree full of gifts beneath it, chances are, you blew your budget (if you haven’t, please tell us your secrets!).

According to a study conducted by the National Retail Federation, 33% of Americans expect to spend around 1000$ on gifts, 22% expect to spend between 500$-1000$, 29% expect to spend between 100$-500$, and 3% plan to spend less than 100$. Now, what we expect and what really happens is completely different. For families who are hosting holiday festivities, consider the added costs of decorations, food and drinks, and maybe a nice new outfit to show off in. That tally goes up very fast.

So in the midst of all of these numbers, who actually spends more?

While people might think that women spend more on gifts, it turns out that men are actually spending more, reaching an average of 725.17$, versus women who will spend an average of 609.49$. And while it will be men who dish out a bit of extra cash during the holidays, the study concluded that women put more time and thought into the gifts they purchased.

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So where exactly is all this money going? The Bank of America conducted a survey looking at over 50 million active credit and debit cards, examining their customers’ spending and transaction history: consumers spent an average of 196$ in department stores, about 306$ in clothing stores, and 306$ in electronic stores. Does any of this sound familiar?

Despite a lot of complaints that go around during the holiday season, ie: it being expensive, the shopping being overwhelming, and the unbearable pressure to find the perfect gift, only 8% of people surveyed said they wouldn’t be participating in holiday gift-giving at all.

However, there are ways of bringing down the holiday stress. It’s common that people leave their shopping until the very last minute – some of the best holiday comedies are based around families trying to pull off the “perfect” Christmas in just a week! – but Flannery Dean, for example, says her sister does her shopping all year round! It gives her more time to put thought into each gift - and let’s be honest, “the pursuit of perfection keeps us up late at night browsing online shopping sites, or out on the street, running from store to store in search of the item that screams ‘MOM!’”. We’ve all been there.

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