It’s a total cliche to say that most women think about their wedding day on a first date with a new guy and dream about saying “I do” even in the super early stages of a relationship. But sometimes cliches are cliches for a reason, right? You’ve probably found yourself thinking about getting engaged, whether you’re in a serious relationship or not. It can be hard not to, especially when you’ve basically been programmed since you were a little girl to want the perfect wedding (and the perfect groom, of course). It’s also impossible not to want to marry your boyfriend when he’s the best person ever and makes you the happiest that you’ve ever been. It would be kind of strange if you never thought about being his wife.
You probably want to get married and have spent a lot of time thinking about the kind of person that you want to be with… but have you thought about whether you would make a great wife or not? It might not be something that’s on your mind, but it’s a pretty important thing to consider. Read on to find out 8 things that you do that are totally wife material… and 8 that mean that you’re a total nightmare!
16. Wife Material: Do Nice Little Things For Your Boyfriend
Anyone can be romantic when it’s your six month anniversary or it’s Valentine’s Day. While roses and chocolate and cards are conventional and traditionally romantic, those things aren’t what really count in the grand scheme of a relationship. If you’re truly wife material, then you do nice things for your boyfriend, and you do them all the time.
What’s more, you do things that might be considered super small by other people, but they mean the world to your boyfriend. You buy his fave flavor of ice cream when he’s had a hard week at the office. You make sure to keep your fridge stocked with the beer that he loves. You text him just to check in and say hi. You clean his bathroom when you stay over because you know he’s had a cold for a week. Yup, you would make an awesome wife if you two got engaged.
15. Total Nightmare: Text Your Boyfriend 24/7
It’s cool to text your boyfriend during the work day to ask how he’s doing and just chat a bit. After all, if you love someone, you want to keep in touch. It’s pretty terrible to think about not talking to them for the entire day.
It’s uncool to text him so much that he wonders what’s going on and why you don’t seem to have a life. If you know that he’s in a big work meeting or that he’s busy and you keep texting him, that’s pretty annoying. And unfair. And ridiculous. That definitely won’t make you wife material… and it probably won’t make him want to keep dating you, either. Would you want to date someone who would never stop texting you?!
14. Wife Material: Never Put Any Pressure On Him
The one thing that you could do to never, ever be wife material? If you put pressure on your boyfriend and tell him all the time that you think that he should propose. That’s a guaranteed way to make him never want to marry you. It’ll get even worse if you start to resent him for it and get super bitter. He’ll wonder where his wonderful girlfriend went and start hating you… and then you’ll definitely never get engaged. It’s not the best idea in the world.
So as long as you never put any pressure on him about the whole marriage thing, he’s going to be feeling pretty good about you and your relationship. Honestly, no one needs to feel pressure from their partner. You two need to get married when it feels right for both of you, not because you think that you should follow an arbitrary timeline.
13. Total Nightmare: Always Ask Where He Is
It’s one thing to care about your boyfriend and be interested in his life and what he’s up to. It’s another thing to constantly text him and ask where he is and what he’s doing. Like that minute. Like that second.
That’s one way to get called crazy (which is the worst since it’s super sexist and cliche for girls to be called crazy). It’s also a way to make sure that he never wants to marry you. If he feels like you always need to know where he is, he’s going to think that you don’t trust him, and that’s not any way to have a relationship. That stuff gets old and fast. You wouldn’t want him to do the same thing to you, so it’s a good idea to put yourself in his shoes and stop acting like this ASAP.
12. Wife Material: Make Fun Plans That He Actually Wants To Do
You definitely know that a lot of guys complain about their girlfriends and wives “making” them do things. They don’t want to go for dinner with their partner’s boring friends or go see a romantic comedy or go antique shopping on a Sunday morning.
If you want to be wife material, then you have to make plans that your boyfriend would actually get excited about. It doesn’t mean that you have to do things that bore you to tears, of course. If he loves baseball but you really can’t even with anything to do with sports, you don’t have to go to a game. But you should find stuff to do on the weekend that both of you enjoy. Then no one will ever say that he’s “whipped” (which is the worst, most annoying and sexist thing ever).
11. Total Nightmare: Complain When He Sees His Friends
You obviously have friends and you care about them and want to see them on a regular basis. Why wouldn’t you want the same thing for your boyfriend? Hopefully you do… but if you don’t, that means trouble.
Not wanting him to hang out with his friends honestly doesn’t make you wife material. It definitely makes you a total and complete nightmare… and you would think that he was pretty horrible if he didn’t want you to see your friends, either. He’s not going to want to marry you if you’re acting this way. He’s also going to start complaining to his friends about you. That’s basically a guarantee. Since that’s probably the last thing that you want, this isn’t going to work out for either one of you.
10. Wife Material: Turn Boring Errands Into The Best Time Ever
When you’re in the honeymoon period of your relationship, you could literally anywhere with your boyfriend and it’s like you’re partying. The bank, the grocery store, just a random walk around the neighborhood — it’s all super fun. You can’t even believe that people would complain about running errands. What’s to complain about?!
You want to keep that feeling going in order to be wife material. If you don’t do that, your relationship is going to feel boring and stale. Let’s face it, being in a long-term relationship doesn’t always mean having romantic dinners by candlelight. Real life gets in the way. Think of errands as quality couple time and talk, laugh, joke around. You’ll feel even more connected to each other and just have a lot more fun in general.
9. Total Nightmare: Boss Him Around
Bossing your boyfriend around is the worst thing that you can do (or at least one of them). It makes you a nightmare of a girlfriend and would absolutely make you a nightmare of a wife.
It also means that your BF will never become your husband because he’s not going to stick around to see how much worse you can get if he puts a ring on it. Honestly, it’s strange if you act this way. What possible reason would you have for bossing him around and telling him what to do? Why wouldn’t you love him enough to let him make his own decisions and be his own person? If you feel like you have to tell him what’s what all the time, that might mean that you don’t actually care about him and that you want him to change. And then you shouldn’t even be dating, let alone thinking about getting married.
8. Wife Material: Compliment Him (But In A Genuine Way)
It’s a little creepy to constantly tell your boyfriend that he looks hot or that he’s the funniest guy ever or that he wears clothes well. But you do want to compliment him on a regular basis… or else it’s kind of creepy, too.
It’s a fine balance, and you also have to find ways to compliment him that feel real and genuine. You can’t just tell him that he has nice eyes or something like that because he’s going to think that you’re just saying the most cliche things that you can possibly think of. Of course, this is something that you’re probably already doing if you’re crazy in love with your boyfriend. So it’s really not a big deal. It just means that you’re already wife material (yay).
7. Total Nightmare: Tell Him To Work Out
It’s attractive when your partner takes care of themselves by eating healthy and finding a type of exercise that they love. People go through phases where they don’t work out that much or at all, though, so if your boyfriend hasn’t been exercising lately, you shouldn’t talk about it.
Maybe he just started a new job and so he’s been busy with that, or something else has been occupying his time. The truth is that while you’re right that he should exercise and be healthy, you’re not going to win points by telling him that. In fact, it’s going to be the total opposite. He’s going to hate that you’re nagging him and he’s also going to feel super insulted. You don’t want to go down this road.
6. Wife Material: Make Him Feel Supported 24/7
Life is not always the easiest thing, and that’s why it can be so nice and cozy to be in a long-term relationship. You have this feeling 24/7 that you’ve got someone on your side. They’re always going to be there for you and you can always talk to them about the ups and downs of life. Or at least that’s the way that it’s supposed to be.
Being wife material means supporting the person that you love all the time. Whether he’s just gotten a promotion and his workload has increased a ton or he’s nervous about a doctor’s appointment, you absolutely have to make him feel like you’ve got his back. And he has to do the same for you (or he’s definitely not husband material).
5. Total Nightmare: Complain To His Mom About Him
Your boyfriend probably isn’t 100 percent perfect, but the last person that you should be complaining to is his mom. Why? Because his mom is going to totally hate you… and she might even convince him to hate you, too. It’s not the strangest idea ever.
A guy’s mom is a super important person in his life. Sure, you don’t want to suck up her because then that’s just lame and not genuine at all. You should want her to like you, and you should try hard, but kissing her butt isn’t the way to go. She’s not going to like you if you act like you can’t stand her son. And she’ll definitely never want you to become his wife and officially join the family.
4. Wife Material: Create A Routine For The Two Of You
There’s not much that’s better than getting into a routine with your boyfriend. Maybe you and your BF love to grab brunch on Saturdays and Sundays then get some Starbucks and go for a long walk. Maybe you always get pizza on Friday nights and watch your latest Netflix obsession. Maybe you like to cook together every weeknight after work.
Your couple routine might look super different from the next couple’s and that’s totally fine. All that matters is that the two of you spend some quality time together and that you enjoy doing the same kinds of things. If you’re already in a cozy routine, then chances are marriage is not that far away since you’ve proven that you’re both in this thing for real and enjoy spending time together.
3. Total Nightmare: Act Super Lazy All The Time
You’re a total nightmare if you always act lazy and can never muster up the energy to do anything fun with your boyfriend. Of course being a homebody is cool and in these days, and no one wants to go out all the time. Not when Netflix is the best and couches are so cozy.
But if you never want to go out for dinner or drinks or to the parties that either one of you get invited to, that’s another story. And it’s not a good story at all. Your boyfriend is going to wonder why you just don’t seem to want to have any fun. And he’s going to eventually start resenting you for it. That’s one way to get broken up with, so if you’re dreaming of a proposal, it doesn’t sound that likely.
2. Wife Material: Talk To Him About Sharing The Domestic Work
You might think that being a wife means cooking and cleaning and doing everything house or apartment related. That might have made you a wife back in the 1950s but let’s be real here, it’s 2017. You don’t have to do everything domestic… and you totally shouldn’t.
Wanting your boyfriend to cook and clean, too, and share in the chores is legit and normal, and it makes you wife material for sure. It proves that you want his respect (and that you demand it) and that the two of you are a total team. You really can’t even be thinking about marrying someone that you don’t feel has got your back and wants to help out. Why should you be the one doing all the work all the time?!
1. Total Nightmare: Act Passive Aggressive
Being passive aggressive is super lame and yet pretty common. Maybe you don’t realize that you act this way all the time… or maybe you’re doing it on purpose. Either way, you’re kind of the worst girlfriend ever, and you would make the worst wife ever, too.
If something is wrong, you need to tell your boyfriend about it. No beating around the bush. No ignoring the problem and hoping that it magically goes away. No mean looks and snide comments. If you want him to think that you’re a total nightmare, then sure, keep up the passive-aggressive stuff. But if you want to be his wife, then just be a nice, normal person. It honestly shouldn’t be that hard to do. Wedding bells just might be in your future.
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