8 Things He'll Do Subconsciously That Mean 'I Love You' and 8 That Mean 'Go Away'

So you want to know what he actually means when he acts in certain ways, right? You’re trying to decode him because, let’s be honest, guys can be complicated despite what society says. The truth is, guys are taught to tuck away their emotions and not display them for doing so indicates some sort of weakness. This makes our job a little tricky. How do we know what he’s really thinking or feelings if he’s bottling up emotions? Easy, ladies –we have several powers in our control. One, we have female intuition. We just know and sometimes we can’t explain why or how. Two, we have each other to lean on as both teachers and trusted allies. Three, we are so in touch with emotions that even the most evasive cannot escape our analytical grasp.

Fear not, female friends –for we have the ability to see through the darkness and pull out the light. With a few tips and through sharing knowledge, we can see the truth despite all the charades and lies. Yes, sometimes guys send mixed signals and those signals interfere with how we interpret what’s really happening. But no more confusion or doubt –take a look at this list to better understand what he’s holding back. And above all, trust your gut instincts ladies. The divine feminine is always guiding you towards your best self and your best partner.


16 ‘I Love You’ – He Protects You

A man who truly loves you wants to keep you free from harm. He’ll do all he can to ensure you arrive home safely, don’t have to endure another horrible commute home, or help you cope with an upcoming family visit that has you heart in knots. He’s down for the cause and that cause is to protect you. His mission is to serve and protect. If he’s going out of his way to make sure you’re safe, he’s not just falling for you, but he’s in love. Basically, if you hurt, he hurts. And he can’t bear to see you in pain, not only because he feels it himself, but because it’s in his nature to protect that which is of great value to him.

15 ‘Go Away’ –He Constantly Picks Fights

Some girls think that a guy who’s willing to fight is one that at least has strong emotions. And strong emotions indicate passion and intensity, right? Wrong. Strong emotions are linked, much like the fine line that exists between love and hate, but if your guy is fighting with you or others –that’s a sure sign that he’s not really into you. He enjoys attention and might even be a bit passive-aggressive. Your feelings are put on the backburner because he’s got some steam to let off. Regardless if you think all that fighting is a sure sign that he’s protecting you, it’s not. He’s showing his immaturity and unwillingness to handle situation in a cool, calm, and collected manner –and one that would stress you out less.

14 ‘I Love You’ –Gives You Space and Makes Room For You

Not only does the guy give you space, but he also makes sure that he finds space in his own life for you. Space is vital for long-lasting, healthy relationships. The guy who wants you to have your own life isn’t the one that wants to let you go. On the contrary, he wants you to grow and explore you own individuality outside of the relationship. That’s gold right there. And on top of it, if he makes sure to set aside valuable, couple time with you and you don’t have to fight with him about quality time –then he’s not just invested in you, but he’s more willing than most. He’s a keeper and one that you’ll want to respect if you truly want a committed relationship.

13 ‘Go Away’ –Doesn’t Include You or Forgets About You

Sure, you’ve heard this before, right. If he’s constantly kicking it with his boys or has more guy’s nights out than date nights, then he’s not a keeper. Couples need to find out which type of space works best for them. A guy who’s more into hanging with his homies doesn’t sound like boyfriend material, period. He’s looking for time away from you in ways that might not be healthy or that could compromise the relationship. Even when an interesting activity arises, but you get no invitation –well, that’s a dead giveaway right there. He doesn’t want to invite you because he doesn’t want to invite you. He doesn’t want you around. There are no hints here, just straight up signs. Don’t be blind to his lack of attention to you.

12 ‘I Love You’ –Supports Your Style

It might not seem like a big deal, but a guy who supports your style is one that deserves hella credit. If you like wearing cut-offs and bra tops and he’s fine with your self-expression, cool. If you like to color your hair with Manic Panic or get piercings and he’s down, cool. If you have a strange sense of style or don’t fit the standard European style of beauty, but he supports your choices anyways, cool. The guy who lets you be you, whatever that may be, is one that you shouldn’t let slip through the cracks. He’s comfortable with himself enough to let you be yourself. And he’s not embarrassed by your self-expression which is even more important. He wants you to feel your most authentic self and that alone is true love.

11 ‘Go Away’ –Criticizes Every Detail

If he’s looking at every detail and picking it apart piece by piece and tearing you down, this guy does not have your best interest at heart, no matter what he says. He might say he’s trying to improve you. He might say you need some guidance. He might say no one else is going to tell you the truth like he does. All lies, every single last one. While in his mind, he is trying to make you a better version of you, one that suits him and his lifestyle, he’s not thinking about what’s best for you. Deep down all of that criticism, he’s hoping you’ll see that you’re not matched and you’ll make your way to a guy who’s much more your style. It’s just this guy doesn’t have the balls to tell you that and instead picks apart everything about what you do, wear, or say. He pushes you away because he can’t find the way to say that he’s not that into you.

10 ‘I Love You’ –Accepts Your Emotions

Women cry. It’s what we do. We also get mad as all hell. Our scorn has yet to be matched. So a guy who lets you have emotions without blaming them on your period or just being a crazy women is one who doesn’t just understand women on a deeper level, but one who respects the array of emotions that we have. Men have them, too, and although less socially acceptable, they do get carried away with their emotions from time to time. Therefore, it shouldn’t be so wild for men to accept our emotions no matter how high or low they may be, right. The guy who lets you feel all the feels is the one that wants you to enjoy your human experience. Part of the experience is getting emotional, kicking, crying, screaming, and loving.


9 ‘Go Away’ –Wants You To Control Your Emotions

The one who prefers you to hide your emotions away is not the one you should want to stay. Secretly, he’s embarrassed by your emotions. The only way to dominate the situation, then, is to control your emotions. For him, emotional displays –whether positive or negative, are socially unacceptable and personally annoying. He’d rather you just be neutral or even emotionless. That way he can save face with his friends and family rather than have to explain why you’re so emotionally unstable. But little does he know that humans are emotional unstable all the time. All the stability is the farce and the fact that he wants you to hide away is only more proof he wants you to go away. So go ahead and do him and favor –then search for the guy who lets you be human.

8 ‘I Love You’ –Doesn’t Let You Go Away Angry

Fighting is natural. It’s a sign that you’re both human. What matters most in the face of any disagreement is how we respond to each other. Are we listening or just yelling? Are you pointing fingers and not looking in the mirror? Our ability to be more present in an argument will help us grow as individuals and couples. One thing that’s hard for us all is letting go. Letting go of the anger and the fear that’s behind it is tough stuff. If your guy doesn’t want you to walk away mad or go to sleep angry, he’s 100% in love with you. He cares about your feelings. And he’s aware that they play a huge role in your well-being. Trying to calm you down isn’t trying to dominate you, it’s finding a way to best deal with your heavier emotions in ways that are productive.

7 ‘Go Away’ –Makes You Angry On Purpose

If he instigates fights or says provocative things despite the fact that you’ve had that same conversation at least a dozen times, he’s pushing your buttons in the hopes that he’ll push you out the door. Any guy who wants to make you angry on purpose, whatever that purpose is, doesn’t have your best interest in mind. He’s looking to rile you up because he’s unhappy. And since misery loves company, he’s trying to build his own village. But don’t let him bother you. Know that the guy who enjoys seeing you pissed doesn’t like how cute you look when you’re all angry, he likes the power he has over you. It’s a form of manipulation that’s got nothing to do with love. Deep down, he’s unhappy and wants you to be equally miserable. Before you reach those depth, realize what’s really going on and say bye to this guy for good.

6 ‘I Love You’ –Gives You The Best

Giving you the best means something. It means he no longer puts himself first. Does he give you the first bite of his favorite food or save you the last bite of pizza? Does he give you the best seat at the show so you can see better? Does he want to spoil you in ways that go beyond financial security and into pleasurable, spiritual realms? The guy who is willing to sacrifice for you is the one who’s in love with you. Helping you get ready for work, washing the dishes, rubbing your feet, vacuuming, or drawing a bath after a long work week are all signs that this guy wants you around for the long-haul. Do him a favor and give him some of that same treatment before you start to take him for granted. Guys that nice are likely to slip away the minute their kindness goes unnoticed. Give him some overdue attention and tell him you love him first if you feel the same way, don’t be shy.

5 ‘Go Away’ –Gives Himself The Best

The guy who hates sharing isn’t one that knows how to love. The one who divides the pie into separate but equal parts has some issues, but still hasn’t committed himself fully to the idea of being in love. Sharing is caring. And caring is our basic way to show love. This is a love language as old as our ancestors. We have always given the best pieces to our elders and loved ones without question and we’ve done it as a species for centuries. Now it’s all about being selfish. Where did the sacred concept of sacrifice go? If he hates sharing and gives all the best parts to himself, not only is he selfish, but he’s on the verge of being a non-human so disconnected with the universe that staying with him would be a detriment to your soul’s survival. Unhook that guy immediately.

4 ‘I Love You’ –Encourages Your Dreams

If he’s totally down for your dreams, no matter how far-fetched or absurd they may be, then he’s in love with you. People who encourage our dreams are those who love us for us. Mostly our friends and families take on these supportive roles. They are known for unconditional love that lasts a lifetime. However, this isn’t always the case when it comes to our partners and that’s not just unfortunate but pathetic. If you cannot count on him to know what your dreams are and support you, then you can’t count on him for anything. The guy who stands by your side through thick and thin, still cheers you on, and never loses hope is the one who’s on the verge of saying those three magic words.

3 ‘Go Away’ –Doesn’t Even Ask

Showing disinterest isn’t just rude, but it’s a character flaw. In a relationship, whether romantic or plutonic, the primary goal is to find people of like-minded origins who push us towards our best. If you haven’t been encouraged to talk about your dreams, this guy simply doesn’t care about your or your future self. If you have tried to make your dreams known, but he shuts them down or laughs, then you’re a fool to stay. Don’t let him try to convince you that your dreams are silly or unattainable. It’s only the guy who’s got nothing going for himself that will try to convince you of the same. Let that loser go and get away from him as fast as possible. And be grateful that universe revealed his true nature to you sooner rather than later.

2 ‘I Love You’ –Casually, Makes Your Life Easier

Life can be hard. And not just sometimes. It can feel like there are weeks on end where life is hard all the damn time. Having someone to ease stress is more valuable than almost anything else out there. If he finds ways to decrease your struggles, but you’re not even sure how or when. If he knows how to calm you down when no one else can. If he knows how to pick you up from the lowest depths and dust you off again. Well, this guy is madly in love with you. It takes both courage and strength to love someone that much and he’s doing all he can to go beyond the standard flower and candy routine to give you some real-life love to ease that which pains you. It’s not easy to find a way to make it work, but he’s doing it and you’re impressed and that right there is real.

1 ‘Go Away’ –Has No Clue What You Need

If you find yourself stressed to the max, then along comes your guy who makes things ten times worse –not only is he heartless, but he’s got zero management skills. A guy who doesn’t know what his girl wants or needs is almost pointless. What purpose does he serve beyond that of lust and arm candy? If he cannot figure out how to cheer you up when you need it most or lessen your burden in some way, then you’re wasting your time. His lack of dedication and commitment is evident and his indifference the biggest red flag. No need to hold on to someone who doesn’t know how to hold onto your when you need it most. Even a hug can make a difference and if he’s not giving those out, all sign point to him pushing you away. All you’ve got to do is listen, walk out the door, never look back, and be ready for new opportunities.


More in Love