Relationships are hard work, and anyone that says or thinks otherwise isn’t being totally honest. Even seemingly ‘perfect’ relationships aren’t what they appear. We are so worried about being social media #relationshipgoals that we forget how imperfect we and our partners actually are. You could be one of the most compatible matches out there, but if neither of you is honest, or someone doesn’t communicate, then things can easily fall apart.
It takes the work of two people to make for a strong, and lasting relationship. But how do you know whether it’s right or not? Connections work off of fact and gut instinct. There are certain deal breakers in relationships that need to be taken seriously. But of course, they are all up to you to choose. Are you able to get over your partner cheating? Does their constant bad mood end up effecting you?
There are many things to take into consideration when you’re thinking of breaking up with someone, or you’re looking to work out your problems. Some things simply can’t be worked out, while others can easily be soothed with some logical thinking and communication on both sides. However, you need to be honest about your limits and your current relationship’s situation. Not everyone is meant to be, and most of the time it’s safe to say that we create our own paths. Here are some examples of deal-breaking issues and problems worth solving.
16 Reason To Break Up: They Betrayed You
Are you willing and wanting to build trust up again with your partner after a major betrayal? There needs to always be trust in a relationship, otherwise you are doomed. However, when your partner takes your trust for granted, it is often a major bad sign that they don’t care about you as much as you originally thought. Plenty of people make mistakes, but when they knowingly deceive you it’s much better to call it quits than possibly repeat the same situation.
If your partner cheated on you, and they confess it to you directly, then maybe there’s still a chance. They didn’t wait to get caught because their conscious was eating at them, and they knew they’re betrayal wasn’t right. However, if you go on a hunt and dig for clues only to find out that it’s true then you should breakup before they hurt you more.
15 Reason To Stay Together: You Feel Like Yourself Around Them
There are plenty of times when your boyfriend or girlfriend may do or say something stupid that rubs you the wrong way. Hey, it happens to the best of us. Fights and arguments aren’t reserved solely for couples doomed to fail. Feeling comfortable around your partner is essential to and everlasting relationship.
You plan on spending a lot of time around them, maybe even your entire life. You can’t afford to be shy around them, or think being anything but yourself will keep you from repelling them. If you can’t be authentic, then what are you doing? Trust me, this relationship won’t last long. This is the person you need to be sharing your deepest secrets with, without feeling judged, of course. Eventually, you’ll tire of playing a character around them 24/7.
14 Reason To Break Up: They Toy With Your Emotions
Have you ever been in a situation where the guy or girl that you’re dating tells you one thing, and then they totally change their story later on down the line. Then they tell you that they can see themselves falling for you, but they also want to keep their options open and you feel obligated to abide by their rules. They may even act a certain way around you when you two are alone, and they’re a whole other person in public. Yeah, they’re messing with your head and your emotions.
That kind of back and forth psychological game that they’re playing with you is so wrong, and whether you’ve brought it to their attention or not, they will never stop doing this. This is dangerous territory, and frankly, you can always do better.
13 Reason To Stay Together: You Are Genuinely Happy
You’ve got everything going right around you, and in swoops this gorgeous stranger who is making your inner light shine even brighter. Sure, maybe every waking moment isn’t a walk in the park for you two. But more often than not, you realize that your life is complete with or without this person. However, it is so much nicer to have them around.
When you wake up every day making a conscious choice to be with your partners, and you’re happy to do this, then this relationship has a great foundation laid out. But if you feel like you have to be with this person, and you’re just afraid of letting go, then you’re ‘happy’ for all of the wrong reasons. You may think that you are genuinely happy, but being happy starts with you. You can’t depend on someone else for it.
12 Reason To Break Up: You Happily Imagine Life Without Them
You may enjoy being with your current man from time to time. But frankly, you often find yourself daydreaming of the good old days when you could go wherever you wanted, whenever you wanted without feeling like you had to report to a drill sergeant. In fact, you’re in a relationship with this person, and yet, you know you’d be much happier on your own.
This might not just be a phase. It may just mean that you two aren’t right for each other, and maybe you should really consider breaking up with this person. Why would you stay with someone if you’d rather be on your own, or just without them in your life at all? You need to remind yourself that you don’t need them and move on immediately.
11 Reason To Stay Together: They Keep You Grounded
If you often find yourself with your head in the clouds, it’s nice to have a partner that helps to gently bring you back down to reality. Your partner should always have your back, and they should also be there for you when you need them the most. If you often find yourself handling tough situations on your own, then that sounds like a major deal breaker. Of course, that’s only if you don’t choose to go through the motion on your own.
Shutting yourself off from your partner often confuses them, so if you find yourself doing this then you’re the problem, and you need to correct this. The perfect partner keeps you grounded by choice, and has nothing but good intentions towards you. They ar your rock when you need them to be.
10 Reason To Break Up: You Keep Thinking About What It Would Be Like To Be With Your Ex
Even if you are in a great relationship, if you find your mind constantly wandering to another person then consider this your warning: things will go south soon! No matter the intention, your current partner deserves enough respect to not compete for attention with your imagination. If you constantly think about an ex, then you definitely aren’t over them and you shouldn’t have gotten involved with with your current partner.
This happens way too often with serial monogamists. Rather than taking the time to be alone and learn from the mistakes of their previous relationship, they rush into a new serious relationship to distract them from the heartbreak. This may also mean you are emotionally dependent on others, which makes for a very unhealthy relationship. Take the time to be single and get to know your self again.
9 Reason To Stay Together: They Bring Out The Best In You And Themselves
We do not need people that bring out the worst in us. We need someone who inspires us and brings out the best parts of ourselves. I don’t think it’s fair to say that partner should make you ‘want to be a better person’. Who says you’re not already awesome? But having a significant other that supports you and almost infects you with positive energy is a sure sign that you two will last.
That’s not to say that only happy and positive people make great couples, but we all need someone to push and challenge us sometimes, otherwise we can’t really grow as people. If your significant other wants to grow with you and vice versa then you’re on the right track to a very healthy relationship.
8 Reason To Break Up: They Always Say The Wrong Thing
Sometimes we put our foot in our mouths more often than not. That’s pretty standard if you ask me. But does your significant other constantly say all of the wrong things? It’s like they don’t even know you at all. Worst of all, if they are insulting you or putting you down verbally then that is a big fat sign that you need to get away from them as soon as possible.
There’s also the possibility that he can never say the right thing because he just really doesn’t know you. No matter how long you two have been together, some people just don’t get it. If you’ve attempted to sit down and address conflicts and they still don’t get the hint, then you’re better off without them.
7 Reason To Stay Together: You Both Have Too Much To Lose
When you are in a relationship, you eventually start to invest your time, energy, and even money on things together. Eventually, you begin to feel that you’re both in it for the long run and so you continue to both put in work, as well, you should. All relationships go through highs and lows, it’s a pretty standard notion.
If you think you should walk away, you really need to ask yourself why, and what will you lose. By no means should you stay with someone just because you share an apartment and a phone bill. Are you really ready to end your relationship, or are you just currently frustrated with your situation. There is a big difference between the two. If you’re willing to work on your relationship together then you will have more to gain than lose.
6 Reason To Break Up: You're Busy Faking It
Your friends are carefully sharing cute little stories about their significant other. Then comes your turn, and you lie and say that everything is alright and you couldn’t be happier. Well, the truth is that you could totally be happier, but what would cause this? Would it be breaking up with your current partner, or changing some things in your relationship for the better?
I get it. Some days are just harder than others so you’re busy plastering on a smile just to get through. But if this is often the case with your relationship, then you really need to make some changes. Whether that means breaking up, or making some distinct shift in your relationship. If you find yourself faking it a lot, ask yourself why.
5 Reason To Stay Together: You Happily Finish Each Other's Thoughts
No one is saying you and your partner have to have a deeply connect ESP gift that you share with one another. I am referring to how well you and your significant other know each other. Are you even on the same page? This is important because so many couples think that they are going in the same direction only to quickly find out they couldn’t be more wrong.
Sure, there are times when you two don’t meet eye to eye on certain aspects, but you should at least know each other’s major goals, and ensure that yours and theirs align. Otherwise, you will find out that you and your would-be soul mate are sadly mistaken. It happens sometimes when the honeymoon phase is over and you realize you two are actually not that compatible.
4 Reason To Break Up: You Don't Know Who You Are Without Them
One major reason to break up with someone is when you get so swept up in your relationship and that person’s aspirations and dreams that you suddenly realize you have no idea what you really want. At the begging of any relationship, we all want to come off as easy going an agreeable. But at some point, things have to get real. You need to be honest with yourself and your needs, and if your needs aren’t being met then you can find someone who will meet them.
This is impossible to do when you don’t know who you are anymore. This kind of thing goes on all of the time without us even knowing. It starts with a small lie, like you love fantasy football. And suddenly every year you’re playing with your significant other, wondering how on earth you got there.
3 Reason To Stay Together: You Can See A Future With Them Even If You're Going Through A Rough Patch Right Now
Anyone and everyone is prone to a rough patch here and there. It doesn’t mean that there is any love lost, it just means that—hello, we’re human. No two people are completely alike, right? That would just be so incredibly boring. Having differences can be so nice, especially when both you keep an open mind on things and are willing to learn about your differences rather than trying to strike every one of them down.
If you’ve hit any kind of rough patch with your boyfriend or girlfriend, then think about your future with them. Is this tiff worth throwing away a possible future together for, or is it something you both can get over and eventually agree to disagree on? Everyone fights, the important thing is to remember why you love them.
2 Reason To Break Up: You Only Started Dating Because You Hated Being Single
Okay, so you’ve been single for what feels like forever. Now what? It’s eventually time to move on to someone new, right? Anyone new! Please, just claim me. Okay, don’t think like this. But I will admit, I’ve gotten to my desperate place over the years where I was willing to commit to anyone and make it work, only to realize what a huge mistake I was making. Not to mention, what an obvious mistake. Who cares if you’ve been single for three weeks or three years?
If you’ve gotten to the point where Penny is when she is picturing herself dying alone on her birthday in Happy Endings, then take some comfort in knowing you aren’t alone. But this doesn’t mean you need to jump into a relationship. Have fun being single!
1 Reason To Stay Together: You're The Most Comfortable Around Each Other
You’ve had such a crummy day, and work was just awful. So, you go home to your boyfriend and girlfriend, happily, because they always remind you to be grateful and how insignificant the little things are. It’s the best! If you two are completely comfortable around one another, then what is stopping you from being happy? It’s probably just all in your head.
Comfort is something that doesn’t come so easily to everyone. You will notice after dating all of the wrong people that after dating the right person, you can be your flawless self around them without any judgment passing between you two. Trust and believe that being yourself is not the easiest thing until you really meet the right person. Suddenly you aren’t so afraid of being a dork and revealing your obsession with Harry Potter fan fiction.