8 Signs He's Into You & 7 He's Not

"Is he into me or is he not?" That very question has caused several women countless sleepless nights thinking about the way a particular dude really feels about them. In most cases, the signs are really all over the place especially in the beginning. Over time however, things settle down and you’re finally able to get a clear view on what his intentions are.

At the end of the day, the energies surrounding a relationship are the detrimental factors. When the energy seems extremely high, that is because the relationship is based on real love and loving actions. However, when things seem to be low, a sense of fear can possibly be in the air which can stem from unfaithfulness, guilt and separation. If that’s the case, chances are he’s not really into you.

The following article will take a look at both sides of the coin. Interestingly enough, one entry even discusses how a guy's actions can show him being into you for the short-term but not in it for the long haul. Yes, it can be a cruel game. So without further ado let’s begin, here are eight signs he’s into you and seven he’s not, enjoy!

15 Into You: Initiates the Conversations

“Who texted first”. Oh that classic line that we’ve sadly heard one too many times and probably uttered ourselves. This is the problem with the world of technology, it creates some of the most illogical ways of thinking. Back in the day, a phone call was suffice and before you knew it, you were out on a date.

Nowadays, times have changed and rarely do “non-text” relationships actually exist. Even our parents are texting, even though it takes them a solid two minutes to type the word “dog”. Ok, we’re getting a little carried away here so let’s get back to the main point that initiating a convo actually does have a sense of validity when assessing how into you a guy really is. This not only shows you're on his mind, but also demonstrates his eagerness to talk to you. Wanting to constantly know more information about your likes and dislikes is certainly another positive sign. When a guy wants to know more, he’s definitely into you!

14 Not: Barely Reaches Out

The opposite of starting a conversation is rarely engaging in any type of discussion with a guy. Some men try to play the game of “hard to get” but after a while, if they're truly into you, you’ll see their cards unfold. On the other hand, if they continuously negate the communication aspect of the relationship then sadly, he might not be into you.

As we discussed in the previous point, a man loves to know about someone they’re truly into. With that in mind, conversations go on and on, pretty much daily, especially in the early beginnings. On the other side of it, not putting an effort probably means he’s putting an effort elsewhere. Remember that in life, the energy and time you put in goes to the things you’re most passionate about. If he’s into you, that passion is you. If he’s not, he’ll take his time elsewhere. Don’t neglect the signs.

13 Into You: Values & Asks For Your Opinion

When a guy is really into you, he’ll bring you alongside his silly adventures and ask for your opinion on the things he enjoys, whether that be picking his favorite shirt at Zara, or selecting a tightly fitted t-shirt at Under Armour, if he’s into you, you’ll be by his side for these events. A guy loves the confirmation of approval from someone he truly values, if he doesn’t however, the dude simply won’t ask and walk to the beat of his own drum.

With that in mind, it’s one thing to ask for your opinion, but it’s another thing to actually value what you have to say. When a man listens to you and values your opinion, it really gives you a clear sense of how he truly feels about you. More times than not, he’s really just trying to impress you, so learning about the things you dig will only help his playbook and repertoire while he’s by your side.

12 Not: Never Invites You to Social Events

“So yea, I’m going out tonight with some friends”. Girl responds “oh that’s fun”. Guy, “yea, it’s going to be a pretty good time”. END CONVO.

This type of conversation probably boils your blood. How many times has a guy just pretty much ditched you without even offering an invite? But wait, maybe he did and that was followed up by the “but it's guys only”, even though you go on SnapChat an hour later and see the same dude downing a bottle of Grey Goose next to a group of girls. Yes, guys can be very cruel.

If this seems to be the case, he’s more than likely not into you. If a guy truly likes your company, he’ll invite you to social events as way to show you off. A guy who really likes his girl, is proud to have her by his side.

11 Into You: Puts In The Effort

This is the exact opposite of the previous entry, on the contrary, if a guy truly does value your presence, he’ll make an effort to see you. Time management is pretty much everything in life. By nature, we should prioritize and spend our time properly on the things we love doing the most. So if you hate your job, quit now, but that’s for another time. Time is all about you making the most of it and if that means a dude is constantly making an effort to see you despite his crazy schedule, that’s a definite plus.

Not only is making time important in terms of effort, but the effort alone is also a huge sign. Taking you out on a nice date or just putting some thought into something is another great sign. Even a dude taking care of himself and always looking well groomed is another indicator that he’s putting in an effort to impress you.

10 He’s Not: Only Sees You On His Schedule

“I can’t tomorrow, but I’ll let you know when we can chill”. That very statement has probably been the reason why various phones have been smashed or destroyed. Most people want to throw their phone across the room after receiving a message like that. And it's because that statement is a clear cut sign that a dude is taking control of the “relationship” and pretty much chooses to see you whenever it’s convenient for him and only him. When a guy is truly into you, the situation tends to be a two-way street which caters to both the guy and girl and not just one person involved.

We talked about it earlier and we'll bring it up again, time management is truly everything. Whether you’re aware or not, our time tends to get manifested into the things we love the most. Our subconscious just pretty much drives us towards these things, they give us a sense of security. Now if a guy isn’t including you into that rotation, it's definitely not a good sign for the future.

9 Into You: Checks Up On You

To be clear, most women don’t like a guy that is too into them. It’s only human nature, we need our space even from those we love dearly. With that said, we do however crave a sort of “invisible comfort blanket” which is that special someone who always has your back and looks out for you. A guy checking up on you makes you feel great, it's nice to know someone cares enough to make sure you're okay. That’s definitely a huge sign that he's into you and one of the most crucial ones at that.

For a dude, this really means he’s starting to fall for you and cares about your well-being. When he reaches this stage, things are probably getting really serious and maybe he might kick things up a notch shortly after by making it official. Showing he cares is a clear cut sign he’s into you.

8 Not: Avoids Serious Conversations

A guy tends to show his stripes based on the things he talks about. If conversations always seem to be fun and playful, that might not be the best sign even if it seems joyous during. Failing to discuss hot topics like the future and his interest in you can prove that he’s not ready for something long-term, and instead just thinking about the present. Some guys do enjoy quick flings, while having their fun and moving on to the next girl. If you're into that, then it’s fine, however, if you’re looking for something serious and a sign that he’s into you, this guy probably isn’t into you.

Again, your thoughts and actions are manifested through your mannerisms and words. If his actions and dialogue don’t indicate the future, then chances are he’s into you at the moment, but most probably not in a long-term sense.

7 Into You: Talks About The Future

Now this dude is the complete opposite of the other guy we just spoke about. Language is everything and if a guy talks to you about the future, that’s a huge sign. If he discusses you in it as well, then, you can be pretty sure he's into you.

Having him talk about the future, especially if you didn't bring it up, is a great sign. It just shows how comfortable he is with you. Think back at conversations you had with certain people about your future, chance are, those you talked with were either your closest friends or family members. Rarely do we ever speak about such a matter with random people who have less significance in our everyday lives. In a similar regard, a guy is clearly into you if he chooses to discuss such a personal matter with you. He is letting you know that he sees your relationship lasting a while.

6 Not: Makes His Friends A Priority

It wouldn’t be a proper relationship article without referencing a line from the fictitious and unofficial “Bro Code”. Line 2 of the code reads “no bro shall let the girl take them away from the fellow bro”. However, line 87 also reads “a bro shall make time for both bro and female”. Some men however, skip out on line 87 and only chose to see a situation based on the prestigious, line two of the bro code. If this happens, chances are he’s not into you. As close as a guy is with their friends, a particular love interest will change that significantly. Making time for both, is the absolute key.

When a bro is really into a girl, he’ll recite line 87 to his fellow bros. The bros will stay silent and nod their heads in approval after a 30 second pause. This validates the bro spending time with both the girl he’s into and his fellow bro buddies.

5 Into You: Shares His Deeper Side


Although men love to boast their masculinity, they do have a deep and sensitive side to them as well. At first, the chances of him opening up that door are rather slim, but once it does happen, man is this ever a huge sign he’s into you. Your job once this occurs is really simple, just listen and be there for him.

A guy sharing his deeper side finally shows just how comfortable he is with you, by unveiling such information. Men normally tend to bottle those things up and will only share their true emotions on some touchy matters when the comfort level is at an all-time high. Having these types of conversations bodes extremely well for the future and will only bring a guy and a girl that much closer in a relationship. Before you know it, you guys are picking out flowers together. Ok, we took it a little too far...

4 Not: Doesn’t Remember Things

This specific point can come in a variety of forms, each more aggravating than the next. Yes, it’s human nature for guys to forget things, but making it a habit can only to prove that he might not be as invested in the relationship or future of the relationship as you are. When you’re into someone, even if you’re a guy, you remember the little things. After all, life is made up of significant moments, those important memories are the ones we carry with us forever. If he doesn’t remember any of the things that are important to you, then chances are he’s just wasting your time.

In another situation, a guy can also forget about things like plans you had for later in the week or of that day. This is also not a good sign and can indicate that guy has his head elsewhere. When someone is fully committed to you, he makes those moments a priority and not something that is forgettable and left on the back burner.

3 Into You: Invites You to Meet His Family

I can see some women sweating just reading this entry, although it gives you nervous butterflies, you go through it knowing it’s a pretty huge deal.

As per usual, family is everything for a guy. Once he feels fully invested in the relationship, he’ll pull off the swift move by taking it a step further and inviting you to meet the people behind his magnificence. Meeting his parents will most certainly validate how into you he really is while growing a bond between each other to a new level. Once the parents are met, the energies of a relationship seem to sparkle with an added element of love. Remember, love is the lead force behind the energies of life. Think about all those good things that ever occurred for you, were you in a good place when they went down? Chances are, you were sparkling and oozing with positivity!

2 Not: Lies To You

Being truthful is basically everything when it comes to a relationship, not only does it create a positive force field but it can help to strengthen a bond even further. Holding onto to a sense of guilt or separation creates a negative energy force based on fear. This factor will only cause harm while avoiding the good. Constantly lying about things in a relationship can unfortunately only get worse creating a far greater separation between two people.

Lying just shows how uninterested a guy is. When someone is really into you, lying is one of the last things they want to do, especially knowing they’ll have that on their conscience. This certainly is not something you want, particularly in a relationship you see a future with. When you just don’t care however, lying comes easy and that is a definite sign his intentions are truly elsewhere and not with you.

1 Into You: He’s Himself

It’s only human nature to put on an act to impress someone you really like, at the end of the day, just take it as a complement. It takes a couple of encounters to really get a sense of what a guy is all about. Before that happens however, a guy normally puts up a front which is more fear-based than anything else. Only a handful of men are actually themselves right out of the gate. For the most part however, that isn’t the case.

Once he overcomes his shyness and fear, a guy finally starts getting comfortable and shows his true self. When that moment finally goes down, it’s definitely a good sign and probably one of the best. When a guy reveals his true identity, it just shows that he’s finally ready to show you exactly who he is and what he’s all about. In terms of a relationship growing, that’s really all you can ask for, a partner being themselves with you.

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