Relationships are changing all the time. Some of the dating rules that worked for your parents and grandparents are pretty outdated today. Although we tend to focus on the way dating has changed for women, such as how women shouldn’t feel they have to play hard to get, we also need to consider that many dating rules that we follow as law are actually not doing guys any favors. For example, is it really fair that a guy always has to assume that he should pay for the first date? Should guys always be the ones to ask a woman out on a date? Although some of these ideas are slowly changing, there’s still an unwritten rule that guys need to do the chasing and put in more effort than women. But enough is enough, and men are on board with making much-needed changes. For example, when it comes to asking each other out on a date, a study by Match.com found that 65 percent of men have been asked out on a date by a woman, and 91 percent of men are totally cool with women making the first move. See? Here are some outdated relationship rules that guys want to put an end to ASAP – and for really good reasons.
28 Guys Have To Be The Ones To Propose Marriage
Sadly, it’s still rare for women to propose to men. Why aren’t more women asking for their boyfriend’s hand in marriage? There’s still a powerful idea in society that men have to be the ones to sweep women off their feet and ask them to marry them. They have to ask the woman's father for permission and/or buy the woman a sparkly diamond engagement ring. These traditions are hardwired into society and it’s going to be difficult to eradicate them. Yet, it’s reassuring that some men think that it’s about time for more women to take the lead and ask men to marry them. In fact, why not? As columnist Tom Miller explains in an article on Em & Lo,
“I have a good friend who proposed to her husband and I thought it was pretty cool. I’ve certainly been asked out by a few ladies and I’m not sure why this is too-too different. I’m not sure what the engagement ring protocol is at that point, but I’m sure we’d figure it out."
"And if she felt goofy about the whole thing later, we could always go through the dad/ring/bent knee/flop sweat/she said yes motions of the traditional proposal.” Nicely said!
27 Guys Have To Be Chivalrous
Chivalry is when a guy opens the car door for a woman, gives her his jacket when it’s cold, and does other gentlemanly things that make her feel special. But the truth is, many men are sick and tired of hearing that they have to be chivalrous when dating. That’s not because they don’t want to be respectful and caring of women, but rather because chivalry comes with loads of expectations that put unfair pressure on men. As a guy called Steven B says on the Babe website, “I think if it is constantly expected from a guy (generally chivalry is referred to with guys) then it could be considered sexist and I can understand why people think that. However, if a person offers to do nice things like that but it’s not constantly expected of them then it’s not [sexist.]”
It’s about time we stopped assuming that men have to do certain roles in order to be seen as valuable. In fact, who says women can’t be chivalrous? Instead of trying so hard to be seen as chivalrous, both men and women should just focus on being kind, genuine people. It will make dating so much less uncomfortable and stressful.
26 Guys Have To Chase Women
“If he really likes you, he’ll move mountains to be with you.” If you’ve ever heard women saying this to each other, you’ll know that there’s lots of pressure for guys to be the hunters in the dating game. They’re the ones who have to make all the effort to ask the woman out and date her, otherwise, they risk being called lazy or not interested in her enough. But that’s crazy! Instead of the guy having to do all the work, it’s important for a woman to meet him halfway. Then things are fair, which is what dating should be.
In fact, let’s stop thinking altogether that men love the chase. As relationship guru, Eric Charles tells Marie Claire, “ Men don't love the chase. 'The chase' is typically a woman withholding parts of herself from the guy – as if somehow being inauthentic will lead to a good relationship."
"Men want to be around women who are happy and fun. It really is that simple. We don't think about relationships as something to plan and analyze, and we don't believe a relationship means anything about us as people.”
So, let’s stop expecting men to be the ones who plan, analyze, and stress about relationships. Rather, let’s see dating as men and women coming together and both giving 100 percent of themselves.
25 Guys Have To Ask Women Out
Should the guy ask the woman out, or should the woman make the first move? It’s a common debate in dating circles that never seems to have a definite answer. Some people stick to their guns that men should ask women out, while others think, “Hello, it’s 2018! Women are independent and can take matters of the heart into their own hands.”
According to a Lava Life survey that was cited by Cosmopolitan, 95 percent of guys think it’s attractive if a woman asks them out. So, let’s stop thinking that women come across as too needy or desperate if they pluck up the courage to ask guys out on dates. In fact, it’s quite refreshing for guys not to always have to be the ones to make the first move. It can also help guys to know that a woman’s interested. As a user on a Quora thread states, “Men are not subtle creatures. We need to be hit over the head a lot. Most of the time I'm completely oblivious to whether a girl likes me or not. My friends will say "man she was really hitting on you," and I'll think nah, she was just being friendly.” See, it can help for women to make their intentions a lot clearer and just ask him out on a date, already!
24 Guys Have To Be The Supportive Ones In The Relationship
“If he loves you, he’ll support you.” Sometimes women tell each other this because there’s this idea that men have to be the supportive partners in romantic relationships. But support in relationships has to be a two-way street! As much as men should feel the pressure to support their girlfriends, their girlfriends should also be trying hard to support their partners.
It’s also worth bearing in mind that sometimes there will be times when a man just can’t support his girlfriend.
Of course, he should be there to support her through difficult times, but that doesn’t mean he should give her 100 percent support if she isn’t returning the favor, or she’s using up all of his emotional and/or financial wellbeing.
That’s not fair!
There are limits to everything, and it’s unfair to expect men to be offering unconditional support. In addition, just because men are often told to be strong and supportive in relationships, it’s unfair for them to carry the emotional issues in the relationship on their own. Relationships should be about teamwork! If there’s no mutual support in the relationship, then men have every right to end those relationships without being seen as not supportive enough.
23 Guys Can't Casually Date More Than One Person Simultaneously
There’s this unspoken rule that if a guy’s dating a woman, such as someone he met on a dating app, he has to date her exclusively. She might be upset if she found out that he was dating other women. Yet, if it’s casual dating that’s going on and nothing too serious, the whole point is to date lots of people simultaneously in order to find the right one. As online dating expert, Julie Spira tells Global News, “I always recommend singles cast a wide net when looking for love online and on mobile dating apps. I believe dating three people at a time is a manageable number early on. This way, you won’t find yourself projecting to the future about one person, who might also be dating multiple people.”
See, it makes sense. This is also something women should feel more comfortable to do instead of having tunnel vision about one guy who might not even be right for them. As mentioned on the Huffington Post, many women have a list of “musts” for men they date. But this is unrealistic because sometimes what you think you want isn’t easily realized in one date. Women, therefore, shouldn’t feel the pressure to make up their minds about someone right away.
22 Guys Have To Pay For Dates
Who should pay for the first date is still a debate, with research showing that men are still mainly paying for dates – in general, not just the first one! A study that was published in Sage Journals found that 82 percent of men still pay the most for dating expenses. In fact, 76 percent of men in the study express feeling guilty if they don’t. Wow! The thing is, it’s really unfair on guys to have to pay for the majority, if not all, of the dates they have with their partners. Although it might be a nice thing for men to pick up the first-date bill, what happens after that should be a lot more balanced and fair than that.
When guys were asked about this issue on BET, one said,
“It depends on what stage in the relationship you are. It’s different if you are married, then it's combined income. But if you are dating, I think we should split everything.”
Another one says, “It’s not like tit for tat. There has to be some of the balance. So let’s start off going Dutch until it becomes a joint account. I’m just saying...we just hanging out. Not married!” Yup, makes sense.
21 Guys Have To Wait A Certain Amount Of Time Before Taking The Next Step
There’s a golden rule of dating: you have to wait at least until the third date to take things to the next level with your partner. That’s been the rule for quite some time, but it’s not always practical. There are no hard-and-fast rules for how long it should take to become closer to your partner. In fact, a survey by The Evolution Of Intimacy found that almost 50 percent of couples wait about one week to a month before taking their relationship to the next level. So there’s really a mix of things happening, and that’s the thing to remember: it’s important to do what feels comfortable for you and your partner. No one else has a right to tell you how to live. No one can tell you to behave in a certain way, especially if that way just doesn’t feel right to you. Relationships move at their own speeds. Sometimes it comes down to liking the person and taking that as a guide for what you feel is right for you to do. As a guy called Noah said in a Glamour article, “If you like us, there’s no reason to hold back.” Maybe it’s time we made dating much simpler!
20 Guys Have To Plan Dates Instead Of Being Spontaneous
Sometimes women tell each other that guys have to plan dates with them ahead of time, instead of asking them out spontaneously. The reason? It shows the women that the guys are really interested in them and not just asking them out because it’s convenient. Websites like The Art Of Manliness agree, saying that it’s important to plan the first date specifically because women love a man who has a plan, so men shouldn’t be shy about taking the lead. That’s fine and well, but there’s something to be said for being spontaneous sometimes. You don’t always have to have a plan for dates, especially if that’s not really in line with your personality. Following the dating rules just to impress women isn’t worth it.
Every woman is different and there will be women who appreciate those last-minute, spontaneous, and romantic dates.
For example, phoning her to invite her out for a moonlit walk. So why give spontaneous dates such a bad reputation? A good mix of planned and spontaneous dates can work a dream to ensure that dating’s fun. It’s also worth remembering that it shouldn’t only be up to the guys to ask women out on dates – women should also initiate get-togethers!
19 Guys Should Date Women Who Play Hard To Get
Ah, playing hard to get has been a common dating rule that many women follow. They do this so as not to seem too eager to date the guy, but it can backfire. Sometimes the woman acts so uninterested in the guy that he thinks she’s not into him and moves on to someone else who is. Playing games can just cause unnecessary problems and complications in dating! They can cause problems for a perfectly good relationship before it even begins.
It’s sometimes said that guys like a woman who plays hard to get because she’s a challenge, but honestly? Many guys are of the opinion that women who don’t play hard to get are refreshing. As a guy called Devin says in a Your Tango article, “I don’t want someone who puts mind games higher on the list than honesty. I’ve been the guy that plays games with girls’ emotions; I’ve been the guy that’s hard to get. When the shoe’s on the other foot, it’s not fun.”
It’s also worth noting that games can be childish, and women shouldn’t feel the pressure to play hard to get to impress a guy. So, let’s put the games aside once and for all.
18 Guys Have To DTR (Define The Relationship)
If a man and woman are dating for a while, sooner or later the issue of defining the relationship comes up. Questions like “Where are we headed?” and “Are we going to commit to each other?” come up. It’s good to define the relationship so you don’t waste each other’s time, but why should the pressure to DTR fall on the guy’s shoulders? Why should he have to initiate the conversation?
If a woman’s dating a guy who’s not making the relationship official, then she shouldn’t be afraid to ask for clarity.
After all, it’s silly to assume that a guy needs to DTR because relationships are about both people’s relationship goals and needs. Women shouldn’t feel afraid to speak up! Besides, much like when it comes to asking your partner out on a date or paying for the first date, it doesn’t really matter who makes the move. If you feel comfortable with your partner, then there shouldn’t be such structured rules. So, if a woman wants to know where the relationship is going, she should speak up to her partner and express where she wants it to go. If people in relationships don’t openly communicate with each other, then how will they ever move forward?
17 Guys Have To Treat The Women They're Dating To Fancy Dates
When a guy asks a woman out, he’s got to shower her with attention. He should bring her flowers or chocolates on dates, and make her feel like a million bucks. Is that really true? Okay, let’s be real for a second: of course, women want to be treated well by the guy they’re dating, but it’s not all about being spoiled and dined. This rule has to change because it can cause problems for the women concerned. For many women, a guy who comes on too strongly and is too charming from the beginning of the relationship can actually be a turn-off. It just looks like he’s trying way too hard to get the woman to like him, and has a hidden agenda.
With dating trends such as “love-showering”, being wined and dined is becoming less appealing. According to Business Insider, “love-showering” is when manipulative people try to hook others by giving them lots of compliments, surprising them with gifts, and giving them public displays of affection. So, when a man does these things, women tend to wonder if he’s genuinely interested in them or just guilty of trying to “love-showering” them. The best thing is to tone down all the extreme loving behaviors until you know the person and those actions feel more genuine.
16 Relationships Have To Be Monogamous
Open relationships are increasing in popularity, and as long as both people in the relationship are fine with them, they can work. In fact, a study published in the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy found that approximately 21 percent of people have been in some kind of non-monogamous relationship. The study defined this as “any relationship in which all partners agree that each may have romantic relationships with other partners,” as explained on Refinery29.
While open relationships aren’t for everyone, they can work for some couples, so the rule that relationships have to be exclusive is pretty outdated for some couples.
According to a Bustle article that looked at why people get into open relationships, one person claimed that it helps to be upfront with your partner if they’re not meeting your needs. By being able to be honest about that and working with your partner, you can create a much better connection in your relationship. The thing to take from this is that there are many different types of relationships – they’re not a one-size-fits-all. Some people prefer to be monogamous, whereas others don’t. Both are fine. As long as you’re open and honest with your partner, and your partner shares your relationship goals, then you can find a setup that works for you.
15 Guys Can't Just Chat To Women - There's Pressure To Make A Move
When dating online, there’s pressure on guys to ask women out quickly. The guy who decides to use dating apps to float around and chat with different people might quickly be labeled as not being serious about finding a relationship. But what’s the harm in just chatting to women? Why is it that the minute a man swipes right on someone’s profile or drops her a message to say hi that it means he’s interested? It’s actually becoming more common for people to make friendships on dating apps instead of finding The One.
There are actually many reasons other than romance for why people use dating apps. According to Forbes, 44 percent of students use Tinder to increase their confidence and pass the time, and 70 percent of dating app users don’t end up meeting anyone in RL from the app. This just goes to show that dating apps don’t always have to require lots of hard work and the goal of getting into a relationship with someone. As a Reddit user explains, “Not everyone is out for a one-night-stand. As a male, I can easily go out just for a chat, although most think I have a hidden agenda.”
14 Guys Have To Keep Their GFs Safe
Guys are often told that they have to be protective of their girlfriends. For example, if they’re out for dinner and a guy approaches his partner, flirting with her, he should tell the guy to back off. Likewise, a guy should take care of the spider in the bathroom when his girlfriend is afraid of it. But are these ideas outdated?
There’s still pressure for men to be the protectors of the relationship, but it’s often an insult to independent women who can take care of themselves. Women might not need or want their boyfriends to do those things for them, or there might be other things that they’d prefer instead. It’s really up to the woman and guy in question.
It’s also unfair for guys to feel they have to be protective just because that’s an old dating rule in society.
Some guys are quite against the idea to be protective. As one guy says on a Quora thread, “I don’t like having to protect people. I like people who can take care of themselves. This is one reason I am not attracted to naive women; I feel as if I would have to defend them, and that just seems like shepherding a child around.”
13 Guys Do The DIY, While Women Do The Cooking And Cleaning
It’s considered “man’s work” to repair things around the house, while women are thought to be the ones who have to do the cleaning, cooking, and looking after the kids. Woah, it’s 2018! Those ideas need to change and yet they’re still quite prominent. A study by the University of Indianapolis that was mentioned on the Telegraph monitored cohabiting couples and found that even in households where the women were the main breadwinners, they were still doing most of the chores around the house, with their male partners leaving the chores for them to do. Yikes! And, when it comes to repairs around the house, it’s considered good for men to be the ones to do them. But it’s unrealistic to expect all men to be able or willing to do these things. Just because someone’s born a man, it doesn’t mean that he’s naturally wired to be able to do things like DIY and repairs. Similarly, just because someone's born a woman, it doesn't mean she should be tied to the kitchen stove.
The point is not to feel like you have to be forced to do things just because you're a man or woman. As a guy says on a Reddit thread, “I certainly think that gender roles can be less or more damaging but I can't think of any possible benefit to having them other than that it might just be human nature to want to put people in boxes. If we had a society without gender roles we might still find that men and women tended towards certain roles and that would be fine. But at least then it's a conscious choice rather than people just doing what they're supposed to.”
12 Guys Are The Disciplinarians When Having Kids
This is another type of gender role that just doesn’t make sense. Who says that it’s a man’s job to be the disciplinarian when he has kids, while the woman has to be the nurturer? It’s part of the parenting stereotype, yet there has been research which has found that men and women parent differently. As mentioned on Yahoo, author of the book Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters, Dr. Meg Meeker, explains
“Dads approach parenting with different priorities than we mothers do. They tend to care less about dress, eating habits, and other details. Instead, dads tend to want to play with kids more and challenge them more, and this can help kids gain confidence.”
But the thing to remember is that this isn’t a hard and fast rule!
Such parenting roles are tied to ideas of masculinity and femininity. It’s considered masculine or manly for guys to play sports with their kids and be the disciplinarians. But there are many guys who don’t display that quality with their kids, and it doesn’t make them any less of a father. The focus when it comes to disciplining kids should be to teach kids respect, and you don’t need to be physically strong or intimidating to do that. As a man on a Reddit thread puts it, “You don't need to wrangle Anacondas and arm-wrestle bears to be manly. The only thing to earn your kids respect is to be respectable, and raise your kids to be respectable.”
11 Guys Have To Make An Effort With Their GF's Friends
When you’re dating a new woman, sooner or later you’ll have to meet her loved ones. This doesn’t just include her family, but also her friends. There are many articles on the internet about how to impress her friend so that they like you. Meeting a woman’s friends and making a good impression on them is also considered important when it comes to showing your girlfriend that you really like her. The idea is that if you’re genuinely interested in her, you’ll make a big effort with her friends.
Really? There’s lots of pressure to fit in with one’s partner’s friends, but there shouldn’t be. It’s unrealistic to expect that you’ll be able to get along with everyone in life. You might try to be nice to her BFF but just not see eye to eye. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be respectful and civil, of course, but it does mean that it shouldn’t be your problem to solve if you don't get along with her friends. If everyone’s an adult, then they should respect each other enough to realize it doesn’t matter. If a guy doesn’t get along with his girlfriend’s friends, that shouldn’t necessarily reflect negatively on him. It’s life, it happens, and he and his girlfriend should be able to work around it if they matter to each other.
10 Guys Have To Wait At Least Three Days After A Date Before Contacting Women
Dating is not a game! Believing that men should wait a certain amount of time after a date to contact a woman is basically saying that the guy can’t think for himself. He has to follow archaic dating rules, and for what? To show the woman that he’s not too eager to date her, or to make her wait for him? That seems odd and unfair. It also plays around with her feelings.
Luckily, guys are changing their minds about this rule and seeing how silly it is. According to a study by Match.com, 78 percent of men reach out to women less than three days after going on a first date with them.
Women also appreciate guys who don’t play games because it shows that they’re mature and aren’t afraid to do things their own way.
As a woman explains on a Reddit thread, “[If he follows the three-day rule] I would think he just didn't like me, and it wouldn't make me like him more if he's going to torture me like that cause some rule said he should. It's way more attractive if people can follow their own instinct.”
Yup, there’s nothing more attractive than someone who can think for themselves.
9 Guys Should Only Show Sensitivity In Small Amounts
Remember when a woman would complain to her best friends about how the guy she was dating wasn’t sensitive enough? Maybe he never talked about his feelings when he was having a bad day, leaving her confused about what was going on with him. Or maybe he didn’t show enough empathy for her feelings. But now that some guys are showing more of their feelings, they’re sadly being limited. It’s not “manly” to be too sensitive. What the heck?
As mentioned in a Psychology Today article, there’s still the idea that men need to hide their feelings. The article uses the example of how men and women will be judged based on their emotions in public: “While many people do not understand the reasons for a highly sensitive woman becoming upset over the sound of a screaming baby or overwhelmed by the crowds at a fair, they will still usually accept her reaction. Highly sensitive men are not often accepted in the same way. Men are expected to hide their feelings, suck it up, and soldier on.” But men aren’t robots and they should be allowed to share their innermost feelings without being unfairly judged for them.
Being sensitive can also benefit relationships for men, as this Reddit user points out: “My relationships are great and passionate since I can understand other people's feelings. My friendships are also awesome.”
8 Guys Have To Do Everything With Their S.O.
Doing everything with your S.O. can be very unhealthy for your relationship. You both are individuals with your own hobbies, interests, and dreams. Those shouldn’t fall by the wayside when you get into a relationship, because you still have your unique identity. Likewise, you shouldn’t have to try to get your partner to share all the interests you have – that’s highly impossible unless you become clones of each other! Although it’s obviously a good thing to share quality time with your partner on a regular basis and this amount of time will likely increase when you live together, being glued to each other is a negative thing for your independence and the relationship in general.
As explained by clinical hypnotherapist and author Rachel Astarte, in an article by Bustle,
“Taking time for ourselves may seem selfish, as though we’re avoiding our partner, [but] in reality, brief periods of solitude recharge our soul batteries and allow us to give even more to our partners and to the relationship itself.”
So, going away for that golfing weekend away with your male buddies shouldn’t be frowned upon. It’s important for you and your girlfriend to maintain your lives outside of the relationship. The bonus? When you regroup, you'll have so many more interesting things to talk about.
7 Guys Should Be The Financial Providers
While this isn’t a rule that’s necessarily enforced when people are dating, when they become more serious it definitely comes into play. When a man has a family, the idea that he’s got to be the main financial provider is especially insisted upon. But it’s a lot of pressure for men to deal with. According to the Pew Research Center, approximately 76 percent of men say they feel pressured to support their family on a financial level. In addition, approximately 68 percent of men surveyed claim that men experience high amounts of pressure to be successful in their careers. It makes sense: they’ve got to earn a lot of money in their jobs in order to be the providers.
A healthy relationship should include both parties supporting each other and meeting each other halfway. It’s also important to bear in mind that all relationships will be different. In some households, the woman will be the main financial provider, for example.
In a Reddit post on this topic, many women claimed that they were against the idea of their male partners supporting them financially. One writes, “If a guy offered to take care of me financially, I would refuse. End of story, I'm not interested in a relationship where I'm dependent on them for money.” Another one said, “Actually, it would bother me to have someone financially take care of me; I like to support myself.”
6 Guys Have To Be Strong
Strength can be attractive, but it’s not necessary for men to be the Incredible Hulk in their relationships. In fact, there’s been increased interest in men who aren’t built or extremely strong.
The wave of geeky guys in the media – think celebrities like Andrew Garfield, Jesse Eisenberg, and Dev Patel – has definitely helped to draw attention away from the strong guys who look like they can move heavy bookshelves down the stairs without breaking a sweat.
It’s just not really all that important anymore to have strong partner, especially because there are much more important qualities to look for in a guy, such as emotional and mental strength.
Now those are things that matter much more than how many pushups a guy can do, wouldn’t you say? Macho isn’t always preferred, as research shows. A survey mentioned in The Times found that what women really value the most in a partner is empathy and a companion.
5 Guys Have To Call Women, Not Just Text
Have you ever heard someone say, “If a guy likes a woman, he should phone her, not just text”? It seems that guys have to jump through a lot of technology-related hoops to show a woman they’re serious about dating them. After a while of texting her, they have to pluck up the courage to call them on the phone as this is said to make a better impression. But does it really?
For starters, phoning someone is pretty old school, with the number of phone calls people receive having drastically decreased over the years. In 2011, a Pew Research survey found that on average, cell phone users made or received approximately 12 calls every day. Jump to 2015 and the numbers were down to six, according to research group Informate. There are so many more ways to communicate with each other – emailing, texting, instant messaging, video chats, social media – that we don’t really have to rely on phone calls like we used to.
That can be a really good thing, especially because phone anxiety can be difficult! The key when chatting with someone is to find the communication method that’s most comfortable for both of you. Consistency when chatting, whether it’s by phone or text, is what matters more than the type of tech you choose.
4 Guys Shouldn’t Rush Into Relationships, Otherwise, They’re Not Boyfriend Material
If your relationship moves faster through certain milestones than other couples', it doesn’t have to be a bad thing! Guys shouldn’t feel that they have to pace themselves otherwise risk giving women the wrong messages, such as that they’re only looking for a fling. The truth is, there are no rules for how long it should take couples to move through relationship milestones. For example, who says that you have to be engaged for a year before getting married? Who determined that it takes around eight dates to become serious, or that it’s unhealthy to start living together when you’ve been dating for six months? As one Reddit user states,
“Set your own pace. Everyone is different. I met a girl and married her 22 months later and we had three kids within the first 4 years of marriage. I wouldn't change a thing.”
Let’s not forget that dating rules are sometimes a false sense of security. You might follow them to the letter and still not find relationship success. For example, you might wait eight months before moving in with your partner but discover that there’s no magic number for making things work. It really depends on your specific relationship compatibility. So, the key is to do what feels right. If you feel like rushing in a little quicker than is your usual style, only you can make that choice.
3 Guys Shouldn't Text Women After Midnight Because It Means They're Not Being Serious
With texting, it’s become much more common to contact people at any time of the day or night. There’s this idea out there, however, that guys who contact you late at night are only doing so because it’s convenient, they’re lonely, bored, or playing games. Disclaimer: this can be true and it’s worth being aware of it! According to Bolde, a guy who only contacts a woman he’s dating late at night is probably not interested in a real relationship with her. If he were, he’d be texting her at other times – not when she’s trying to get her beauty sleep. It makes sense and is even more of a red flag if he’s never available during the day. Just what is he hiding?
That said, if a guy’s texting a woman at different times of the day, he shouldn’t be judged harshly for sending her late-night texts sometimes, too. It doesn’t always mean that he’s only looking for some light banter. In fact, texting through the night can be romantic – think of those long text conversations before the sun comes up that can feel really special. So, unless a guy’s only a late-night texter, it’s unfair to judge guys for texting a woman late at night. We should be a bit more open-minded.
2 Guys Can't Have Platonic Female Friends
Ah, the age-old debate: can men and women really be platonic friends without romance getting in the way? If a woman doesn’t believe this, isn’t it unfair for her to insist that her male partner doesn’t spend time with his female friends? She might be worried that he’d leave her, but that says a lot more about her and her insecurities than it does about the guy!
It’s actually really healthy for guys in relationships to have some female friends. As pointed out by GQ, both women and men have reported turning to their friends to get advice on their SO.
“Who better to speak the language of girl than your friend who is a girl?” the article states.
This can help to strengthen romantic relationships. Plus, let’s not forget that friends are always healthy, no matter what their genders are.
So, let’s forget the myth that guys and girls simply can’t be friends. As mentioned on Bustle, men and women aren’t very different from each other. Two people who are of different genders can totally find reasons to want to be friends with each other, without romance always having to enter the picture. Assuming that is just silly.
1 Guys Can't Be Too OTT About Their Feelings
Guys receive a lot of mixed messages when it comes to the ways in which they should behave in relationships. People claim that guys should be upfront and open about their interest in the women they’re dating from the start to avoid confusion. But then, there’s another idea that creeps into the picture, that of how guys shouldn’t be too open or honest about their feelings. The reason? It can make them look clingy or desperate. Interestingly, this isn’t just an issue that guys have to deal with. Women also face these mixed messages, which can leave people really confused as to how to behave in the dating game.
The important thing to realize is that there actually no rules or right ways to do things. It’s quite liberating to make your own dating rules once you find what feels comfortable for you. According to the Independent, if there’s chemistry between you and your date, then things should flow smoothly just by being yourself. “The only rule you should follow is to follow your own rules,” the article states. Exactly! So, if you feel it’s right to tell a woman that you really like her even though it’s only the second date, go on and trust your gut. The right person will feel the same and appreciate your honesty.
References: Em&Lo, Babe, Marie Claire, Quora, Cosmopolitan, Pew Research Center, Global News, Huffington Post, Sage Journals, BET, Evolution Of Intimacy, Glamour, The Art Of Manliness, Your Tango, Business Insider, Refinery29, Bustle, Forbes, Reddit, Quora, Telegraph, Reddit, Yahoo, Reddit, Café Mom, Reddit, Psychology Today, Reddit, Reddit, Cosmopolitan, The Times, The Cut, Bolde, GQ, Bustle, Independent, Reddit