Men do so many outlandish things that they don't even realize the difference between what's weird and what's not. Most guys don't really consider what a man is doing, so it's not that odd for them to just accept each other's mannerisms, but women absolutely notice! We have certain expectations of the men in our lives and when they do things that seem strange to us, we're definitely going to talk about it!
If a guy just walks up to us picking his nose, some other guys might think, "Oh, he's got an itch" or "Dang, he's gotta get that thing!" Women, on the other hand, will be disgusted and wonder what possessed him to approach them with his finger a knuckle deep in his filthy nasal cavity! If he thinks we'll want anything to do with him after seeing where he puts his fingers, then he's got another thing coming! What's really strange is that men don't even understand that they're doing these weird, gross or even creepy things! When this topic comes up, women don't hesitate to share their stories, and to prove it here are a few weird things guys do without realizing it, according to Reddit women:
*Note: Some entries have been edited for length and clarity.*
22 Women Don't Have To Smile All The Time
"Tell a stranger they don’t know to 'smile'. I don’t just walk around with a big dumb smile on my face all day, that’s weird." - OnionBooty
Why do men think it's okay to tell us what to do with our facial expressions? Is it that they want to see how pretty we are when we smile? Are they assuming that because a woman isn't smiling, she must be having a tough day? Is it their way of trying to make a girl feel better? Regardless of why men do it, women tend to think it's really weird when a man - especially a complete stranger - approaches them and tells them they'd look prettier if they smiled, that they "should" smile, or as them "you don't know how to smile?"
While most people might think this innocent comment isn't a big deal, women often feel offended. It's such an odd comment that elicits such strange feelings that some women go as far as feeling threatened by a man who tries to tell her what to do. It makes no sense for a person, man, woman or otherwise, to walk around with a big fat grin on their face all day long!
21 Don't Be Gross!
"Picking your nose in public when you think no one is watching. Extra cute when you eat it." - SunflowerStarfish
Either men don't understand how disgusting "digging for gold" can be or they just don't mind getting their snot all over their fingers. While a man might be scratching the inside of his nostril or is just trying to get that one little nugget that's making a whistling sound when he breathes, a woman is staring at him thinking of all the things he's going to touch afterward. She's wondering if his clothes are covered in an invisible layer of boogers or if he's unintentionally eating microscopic bits when he picks up his food with his bare hands.
What's worse, a woman considers how often he touches her! How many times has her man caressed her face after picking his nose without her knowledge? What if he ran his fingers through her hair and when she sees it later, incorrectly assumes it's a bit of lint or debris from the wind? This Reddit woman was being sarcastic when she said it was "extra cute" when a man eats the boogers he picks straight from his nose in public. Some may laugh, but the reality is this actually happens! Why men, why!? Don't be gross!
20 Why? Just Why?
"Demand a hug after the first meeting. We may have only said 3 words to each other but they ALWAYS want a hug." - GoonerKitten
Let's be honest here - most guys don't want to hug a woman they've just met because they're really friendly. Most guys want to hug a woman because they want an excuse to touch her. They squeeze to feel her chest up against them and they often wrap their arms around her just because they can, but most women don't actually like being touched - at all, so when a man opens up for a hug, there's a moment of anxiety for her. She doesn't want to be rude but she doesn't like being touched but if she makes a big deal out of it, then there goes her first impression and if she just stays silent then the next time he sees her, he's going to go in for a hug again and the situation starts itself over.
See how something like a simple hug can turn out to be over-analyzed, stress-inducing and outright inappropriate? Guys, it's weird when you go in for a hug when you've just met a girl. Please don't do it and only respond if she goes in for a hug first.
19 What Are You Implying And How Is That Attractive?
"'You look so innocent.' This isn't a compliment. I'm 26. This is creepy." - [deleted]
Why do men think it's okay to say randomly weird stuff like this? What makes a person look "innocent" and why comment on it anyway? It's like he's trying to imply she looks like she needs a bad boy in her life or something - which is a huge turnoff, by the way. Men, if you want to make an impression, try to go for a good one, not an awkward one that leaves women wondering what the heck you're trying to say. If you think she looks innocent, whatever that means, then keep it to yourself. Odds are, if you mention this to her, she's going to assume a few things:
1. You're really weird/creepy
2. You don't know basic communication skills
3. You're trying way too hard to talk to her right now
4. She's better off walking away and never talking to you ever again
Do you want to be seen as a joke? No? Then how about you say something like "I like your dress," "What kind of movies are you into?" or "Hey, I'm X, what's your name?" These options may sound basic, but if you try to lead with a nonsense line like "You look so innocent," then you're guaranteed to crash and burn.
18 Would Guys Like It If Women Always Called Them "Males?"
"Referring to women almost exclusively as "females." Super alienating/debasing/creepy." - koifin
Here's the thing about language - it's always evolving. Some trends like "YOLO" can get to be a little annoying, while others, like the constant use of "female" instead of "girl" or "woman" can start to feel really awkward. When did this trend begin and why do so many people (usually men or military men and women) say "female" or "females" in normal conversation? To some, it sounds like people are describing a type of animal or rare creature. It's almost like saying, "Yeah, so the other day I saw this pack of Canis lupus familiaris gathered around some garbage." Why not just say "I saw a pack of dogs gathered around some garbage?"
Similarly, saying "Yeah, there were a ton of females at the club last night" sounds like women aren't seen as individuals, they're now seen as some kind of beast. It's not cool, it doesn't make you sound any smarter, and for most women, the title comes off as really freaking weird. If women just started saying, "There were a group of males by the bar," everyone would immediately think of aggressive animals, so are people supposed to assume "females" are docile prey? It's just really weird and confusing and, for many women, debasing and creepy.
17 We're Literally Standing Right Next To You
"I wonder if dudes realize how scary it is when they raise their volume in a conversation." - TheDoorDoesntWork
So here's a really weird thing a lot of men do - they get excited and even though they're telling a girl a story and she's literally standing right next to him, by the end of the story he's practically screaming it at her. Now he's on this story-induced high and she's wondering what his problem is because (surprise!) women don't like it when men - or anyone really - yell at them! It's cool if you get super into your story guys, but that doesn't mean your volume needs to shoot through the roof!
This can be especially embarrassing when it happens in public. Suddenly everyone is staring at the guy getting overly excited about some game he played or how he handled a situation at work and his poor date is cringing and trying to pretend she isn't horrified by all the attention he's bringing in. Not only is it embarrassing, but it's actually kind of scary to some women. When a man yells, it's usually a sign of aggression, so when a guy starts to get really loud, some women are seriously triggered and suddenly their eyes are starting to tear up and they're extremely uncomfortable. Some women even get a little jolt of adrenaline and are literally terrified - all because a guy wants to yell something at her. Just stop it, guys.
16 We Get It, Guys Like Us, But Don't Be Weird About It
"Stare, like straight up gawking. You know women have peripheral vision too, yeah? Just because I'm not looking right at you [don't] mean you're being slick." - yokayla
Guys, we get it. Seriously, we do. Sometimes we're wearing something provocative and you just can't keep your eyes off us. Sometimes our makeup is so on point, even other women can't help but stare. There's always a situation in which a woman is the center of attention and she can feel that all eyes are on her. Not only is this okay, but it's likely that she appreciates the attention to her flawless look, but things can get kind of weird when a man just stares straight at her with his mouth open, practically drooling. There is such a thing as looking too hard, and when men do this, women tend to get a little weirded out.
Here's the thing guys, we see you looking at us. You're not as slick as you think you are. When we can clearly see the whites of your eyes, you're no longer offering an appreciative glance, you're gawking at us like we're some kind of escaped animal from the local zoo! Women don't appreciate that kind of attention and you look silly doing it. Try to control yourself and look away if you have to. Everyone would appreciate it.
15 Super Weird
"Hand kissing. Bro, if we aren't at the renaissance fair and you aren't wearing a doublet, knock that the [heck] off." - Digger-of-Tunnels
Some guys want to be gentlemen, and what did gentlemen do back in the day? They took a lady's hand and they kissed it! If you're part of a play or are a server at Medieval Times Dinner Theater, then sure, kiss a woman's hand and know she's cool with it. If you're just meeting her for the first time at a McDonalds where you bumped into your friends and they're introducing you, don't go for the hand kiss - you don't know what she's been touching and she certainly doesn't want your lips anywhere on her skin anyway. You might think it's sweet or that your little gesture will stand out in her mind, and you're about half-way right. She's not going to think you're sweet, she's going to think you're being really weird, and it's definitely going to stand out in her memory, but not for a good reason. In fact, it might be enough to make her avoid you in the future because no woman wants to be touched so intimately by a complete stranger.
Thankfully, most guys don't do this, but for the few of you who do - please consider how you're making her feel and just don't.
14 Respect The Personal Bubble!
"Get way too close in my personal space to the point where they're almost touching me when I don't even know them." - tweeepp
If you're at a club or a really packed out party, it makes sense for people to invade your personal space. When you're at really crowded places like a concert or even at a store during Black Friday, you're not going to have any room to breathe, let alone enjoy your usual personal bubble; however, when you're hanging out with friends at a low-key party in someone's yard and a guy starts talking to you and he's so close you can smell his breath, it's not okay.
Guys, we get it. When you're at a club and you want to say something to us, you usually have to yell in our ears because the music is too loud. When we're hanging by the pool during a BBQ, you don't need to stand so freaking close! Women love their personal space just as much as men do, so when you invade that little personal bubble, you're making things worse for yourself, not better. You want to show a woman you respect her? Stay a respectable distance away and speak to her like she's a human being, don't make her feel suffocated.
13 Unless We're In The South, Just Don't
"Call me a pet name like 'sweetheart, honey, etc.' when we're just acquaintances or strangers..."
"I understand that some girls may not mind it, and I know this is carried over from a generation when times were different, but it just makes me feel like I'm...not the intelligent human being that I am." - xokarissa
Okay guys, here are some basic do's and don'ts when it comes to calling women classic nicknames:
Do: Call a woman "Sweetheart" when she's your daughter/granddaughter/niece
Don't: Call a stranger "Sweetheart" unless you're in the deep South because that's just how people talk there
Do: Call a woman "Honey when she's related to you or you're extremely elderly and she's a little kid
Don't: Call a woman "Honey" when you're at a restaurant and you're trying to grab your waitress' attention and forgot her name. A simple "Excuse me" will suffice
If you're ever in doubt of when you should or should not call a girl "Honey," "Sweetheart," "Dear" or any variation of the aforementioned, consider whether she's a relative, whether you're from a state like Alabama, or whether she's got a name tag that literally identifies her as "Honey." If the answer to any of the previous examples is no, then don't call her a pet name. That's just weird!
12 No Touchy!
"Unsolicited shoulder massages" - byebyebirdie69
Ladies, have you ever been in the midst of a conversation and one of your guy friends walks up and just starts massaging your shoulders? Sometimes guys actually know what they're doing and you've asked for one before, making a friendly shoulder massage just fine - natural, even, but not when you have no idea they're even present and you're obviously busy with your girls. What also isn't okay is when you're out on the town with your squad and suddenly you feel hands on your bare shoulders, attempting to massage you while the stranger leans forward to introduce himself and his friends.
The word "awkward" doesn't even scratch the surface of how this makes women feel. First off, never touch a woman without her permission - ever! Unless you're her boyfriend and you've got a touchy-feely relationship, it's never okay to assume a woman wants to be touched, even if it's a nice, relaxing shoulder massage, because odds are she isn't feeling relaxed in the least! If you want to show a woman you're interested, don't assume right off the bat that she's going to want your hands all over her. Do what any normal person would do and simply introduce yourself or at least ask if she'd like a shoulder rub!
11 Is There Something On My Face?
"Intense staring while talking about something casual." - UsuallyMoot
When a man stares at a woman's face, her first thought is "Oh, no. There's something on my face. Did I squish a bug onto my cheek? Did my makeup run? Is there food somewhere? What's going on? Why is he staring so intensely?" Guys, you may think you're giving her your undivided attention and you're truly interested in what she's talking about, but when you stare with the intensity of a desert sun, she's going to assume either something is wrong with her face or there's something wrong with you.
It isn't that hard to simply look at someone and nod at appropriate times or murmur an agreement to encourage her to continue her story, you don't need to stare as if everything she's saying is going to be on a test later that day. Relax! If you're relaxed, she's relaxed and both of you can enjoy a conversation! If you're staring at her with wide eyes and a slightly open mouth, she's going to assume the conversation isn't going well and will likely retreat to the ladies room to ensure she doesn't have anything in her teeth! Don't be weird when she's talking to you, just be you.
10 How Do We Get In On That?
"Why do guys do that weird high five fist bump when they see each other? And why is it uncommon with girls?" - ogygianqueen
A valid question! According to The New York Times, the fist bump might have originated on the basketball court! Kids would high-five and fist bump when their team scored as a quick celebratory action between rounds. Another possible origin could be when boxers touch gloves before a match. Regardless of how it got its origins, the fist bump has been seen for years as a universal sign of victory or something as casual as saying "hello." What makes it uncommon with women? Who knows? Not all women are opposed to the fist bump, but those who do engage usually do so with men, not with other women, so when men cross paths and say nothing but offer a fist bump, it's kind of weird.
There's nothing inherently wrong with the action, but it is something to wonder about. Why don't women do it? Would it be weird if we suddenly started? As with most things, women should just do what they want. Come on ladies, if you want to be part of the fist bump culture, then jump right in! Who knows? Maybe guys will think we're weird for doing it, or maybe they'll accept it and it'll be the new norm!
"'If only I was younger', said by elderly males" - wercia102
If only you were younger what? Go ahead old man, finish that sentence! We dare you! *cringes inwardly* Why do older men think they can say this kind of thing to a woman - ever!? It, of course, implies that if he were younger, he'd probably ask her on a date. While it's likely meant to sound sweet (in some strange way), it comes off really weird and creepy. It's basically a grandpa admitting he likes the way a young woman looks, acts or speaks, that he's attracted to her and that he'd be all over her if he was younger and stood a chance. It's really strange (read: gross) and it's guaranteed that no woman ever actually feels flattered by such a comment.
Guys, when you get older, don't ever tell a woman "If only I was younger." She won't appreciate it and it will just make you sound like you're trying to creep, which isn't cute or endearing. If you want a woman to cringe inwardly, or outwardly, definitely say "If only I was younger" to her! Better yet, if you want to ensure you'll never see her again, feed her that creepy line and just watch as she runs out of your life!
8 Expect Us To Eye-Roll
"Call women 'little lady.' I mean, I know it sounds nice in your head, but just please don't." - thefatandthefurious
Would you appreciate being called "Little man?" No? Then don't assume women like being called "little lady." Unless you're putting on a show with a cowboy theme, no woman is going to appreciate it. It seems demeaning and implies a woman is beneath a man when he speaks down to her this way. It makes her feel small, and with good reason. According to WordReference.com, user Nunty explains "'Little Lady' is condescending, no matter what the setting. It might be playful within the context of a given relationship, but not in general terms. There is no similar term referring to males because society has traditionally treated men with more respect than that."
It's hard to argue with her since there really is no male equivalent to "little lady" yet the term is still used today when men speak to women. As with many older terms, women are often spoken down to while a man is referred to with respect. Guys, the bottom line is really simple. Just speak to us like we're normal human beings. If you wouldn't call your male friend "little man" then don't call us "little lady."
7 Don't Create Awkward Moments!
"Walking you home after a date without asking 'shall I walk you home?' Like just not leaving. It's often well-intentioned but it's worth asking." - Jesus_Jeremy_Christ
It's the end of a great date and you're tired, but you want to spend more time with her, so you decide to walk her home. She says goodnight and heads off in one direction, and you tag along, assuming she'll understand that your intentions are clear - you're walking her home and spending a few more precious moments getting to know her. Sounds sweet of a guy to do, right?
If you want to walk a girl home after a date, at least mention that you're walking her home! If she's already said goodnight and has started to walk away, then don't surprise her and make things awkward by just continuing the date and walking her all the way to her doorstep or to her car. All it really takes to keep things from getting weird is a quick, "Here, I'll walk you home" or "I'll walk you to your car" and she won't have to wonder why you're following her like a lost puppy. It might sound strange, but guys, at least let her know what you're doing before you do it.
6 Why Do Some Men Do This!?
"Baby voice. Don't ever talk to me in a tone you would use to soothe a scared puppy. That [stuff] is [scary]." - [deleted]
People tend to use a "baby voice" when talking to animals and, well, babies, because they're usually small creatures who spook easily. We also use this kind of speech because we can't help ourselves, sometimes animals are so super cute we can't control our pitch! We have to give the widdle fluffers wots of wuv coz they're so itty bitty cutie patooties!
But that's not the case for full grown human beings.
If you like to baby talk your girlfriend or boyfriend, have at it! The rest of the world will cringe at the sound but ultimately, it's how you choose to interact with your significant other and the rest of us can shove off for all you care. What's super weird, though, is when a guy starts talking to a girl using the baby voice. First off, why is he doing this? Does the girl appear to be tiny, helpless and super adorable? Is he afraid that if he speaks to her like she's a normal person then she won't respond as well or feel as relaxed? Whatever his reasoning, it's WRONG and he needs to stop that nonsense before she makes him stop it.
5 Sorry Not Sorry
"Accusing a woman of putting you in the friend zone, especially if you get angry about it or try to emotionally blackmail her into dating you." - bbcireneadler
This may come as a surprise to most men, but let us let you in on a little secret: Women don't have to date you just because you're friends! It's so crazy, right? It's almost as if she legit wants to be platonic and has no romantic interest in you whatsoever, so she never flirted and never gave the impression that she ever even once saw you as more than just a friend! What a crazy world we live in! To think that a girl could be a guy's friend and she doesn't have a secret crush on him! *collective gasp!*
Okay, but seriously, this happens all the time, so when guys start to get angry about the fact that all the years of friendship he's shared with a girl have amounted to nothing more than an actual friendship, he starts to act like a fool. Suddenly he's blaming her for putting him in the "friend zone," which means she'll never date him. So what if she does? She doesn't owe him her heart and he shouldn't act so entitled to her feelings. She doesn't like you. Don't go around trying to badmouth her for it! Grow up and get over it.
4 Most Women Despise This
"Ask me to call him Daddy. Skeeves me out." - JakeMcDermott
Why, why, why, why WHY do some men do this!? There have got to be some underlying psychological issues with men who want women to call them "Daddy." Most women will flat out refuse to call their boy toys, boyfriends, friends with benefits or even complete strangers "daddy" simply because he ain't her daddy and he never will be! Is it just a weird power play guys are trying to push onto women so instead of looking to her actual father, she turns to him?
According to Rebel Circus, "It's not really about the actual father role, but rather it's about the archetype of a man who is dominant and authoritative, but still loving, nurturing and protective. When you are being called that, you are being offered submission. She is laying down her walls, exposing her vulnerability, communicating that she is yours and she is entrusting her body and life to you in good faith that you will take care of her and give her what she needs."
Unsurprisingly, these thoughts came from a man. Ask a woman, and she'll flat-out tell you, "I hate doing that, I won't do it, and it's weird." Huh. It's truly a miracle how differently men and women think.
3 Zoning Out Or Just Being Weird?
"Owl eyes staring at you while they chew with [their] mouth open." - lookslikesausage
Alright, so there are actually two weird things to this little confession. No one likes getting the "owl eyes" during breakfast - or any other time of day - from a man, woman, child, or anything other than an actual owl. Secondly, when people chew with their mouths open, it's gross, so just don't, okay?
What could possibly be worse than a guy staring at you or chewing with his mouth wide open? A guy who is staring you while he's chewing with his mouth wide open! Head's up guys, let us let you in on a not-so-secret secret: Women really don't like being stared at! Women also really don't like looking at you chew your food or listen to the smack of your lips while you crunch away at your meal. One might assume both these rude actions would be common knowledge, but the sad truth is there are many men (and even some women!) who have no idea how weird it is to openly stare while chomping away. Ladies, the next time a guy does this to you, help the poor man out and tell him how it makes you feel. Odds are he'll stop immediately and you won't have to look at him in that outrageous form ever again.
2 How Is This Not Super Strange?
"If you start commenting on every photo I have with a winky face." - oh_sneezeus
So you finally got the girl's number and she's added you to Instagram, Facebook, SnapChat and tons of other social media sites! Woot! That means she likes you and wants to get to know you, right? Well, it could, or it could mean that she just wants more followers. Regardless, it isn't ever really appropriate to just start sending winking emoji as comments on every single one of her photos. We get it, you think she's cute, but a winky face with no comments at all? What is this, Pictionary? Is a girl supposed to feel flattered because you're winking at her pictures every five seconds?
Here's what's actually going to happen: She's going to initially feel good about the pics that she posted, but as the notifications keep coming in, she's going to get really tired of seeing the same comment for every photo, then when she realizes you're willing to go years into her history just so you can leave that stupid winking emoji, she's going to unfriend you because you're obviously a creeper with so little imagination you can't just leave her a single comment saying you think she's pretty or that she took a nice picture. Don't be weird and don't overdo it! Most of all, don't make your every response so cookie-cutter!
1 Don't Expect Us To Accept
"Randomly add me on Facebook even though we've never talked." - hexler1
Yeah, so that's not gonna happen. Unless she owns a business and you're trying to add her business as a "friend" or join her page, she's probably not going to accept you. That's how private information is leaked and how you can basically stalk her without actually putting in any legwork. No one is going to accept your friend request if you're basically a complete stranger - and for good reason! Facebook accounts get hacked all the time! Some people have to be really careful who they add because they never know who will steal their pictures and open up an entirely separate account where they catfish men or do illegal activities!
If you really want to get to know her, just approach her in a friendly manner and strike up a conversation. Don't try to just add her on social media and hope beyond hope that she'll accept your completely random request, because it just ain't gonna happen, buddy. Stop being so freaking weird, and just talk to her. If she doesn't like you, then she doesn't like you and at least you'll know why she didn't accept your request.