We all hope that our soon-to-be spouse is giddy with excitement and maybe a little nervous on the big day, but what if they're not? What if they're just happy, or are actually thinking about backing out? There are a lot of things that can go wrong when two people decide to get married. Sometimes people back out at the last minute, other times everything is going perfectly until a drunk relative decides to ruin everything. Yet still, there are times when everything really does go smoothly and whatever doubts were in the bride or groom's minds become little more than a fun story to share with their families later in life. Sometimes the bride or groom would rather keep quiet about their fears and they spend the rest of their lives simply smiling and saying the perfect thing to keep everyone in the dark about how they almost left their spouse at the altar or how they nearly cried at the sight of their partner at the other end of the aisle.
But if you've ever wondered what people are really thinking on their wedding days, particularly what thoughts are racing through the minds of soon-to-be husbands, consider these twenty-one confessions from husbands who took to Whisper to share what they were actually thinking on their wedding days:
21 A Happy Ending!
The sad reality is that not everyone can afford health care, so when things get bad, the bills start pouring in. This woman was so desperate for help that she married someone to gain their health insurance. Lucky for her, he was actually in real love with her and wanted to go above and beyond to help a "friend." Eight years may sound like a long time but if they didn't live together and if she was still seeing someone else, then it makes sense for her to take a while to fall in love with him, but it's still a joy to hear that his good nature won her over and he can be happy with her as his legitimate wife.
20 So, Was It Good?
It's good this guy was so comfortable in his relationship that he didn't go through the usual bouts of nervousness most grooms feel at their weddings, but it's sort of a missed opportunity to really celebrate the love he shared with his woman. She was likely very excited about the whole thing, but all he could think of was the delicious cake that would come at the end of the festivities. While there's not necessarily anything wrong with wanting to get the wedding over with, it is a little sad that he couldn't just enjoy the time in the spotlight with his new wife, who had to spend so much time, effort, and money to look gorgeous. The one thing this guy has going for him is an understanding wife and a healthy enough relationship that they know they'll stay together forever.
19 At Least You Only Had To See It Once!
Love the woman, not her wardrobe, right? This guy was probably so happy to see his gorgeous wife walking toward him. Her hair, makeup, and nails were perfect and the love reflected in her eyes was a sight to behold - but that dress though! All brides want the perfect dress but sometimes the design looks better on the hanger than it does the woman. Though he doesn't mention whether their marriage was amazing or gush about his love for his new wife, it's safe to assume that the only part of the wedding he had an issue with was his wife's wardrobe. There are worse things, though, and he still thought she was beautiful, which is an excellent sign for the future of their relationship! Good luck, guy, love her till the day you die!
We all know the discomfort and even pain when something gets in our eyes. A few tears springing up is the body's normal reaction when things get stick in our eyes, but this guy played it off perfectly. Every bride secretly hopes to look up at her groom at the end of the aisle to find tears in his eyes and a smile on his face. This guy probably wasn't smiling but he was likely wiping the excess tears from his eyes, despite the other one being perfectly fine. Talk about perfect timing! Everyone was likely touched by his appreciation of his bride-to-be and he came out looking like the perfect groom! Whether he decides to tell his wife the truth someday remains to be seen, but at least he was able to get through the wedding while looking like the groom of the year!
17 What A Way To Start A Marriage
The great thing about being hungover is that you can actually get away with telling people you're simply not feeling well or, as in this guy's case, that you're just so nervous that you can't act like you normally do. One would think movies like The Hangover might teach people not to have crazy bachelor or bachelorette parties the night before the wedding, but people still do it. Then they wonder why they don't feel refreshed the next day at one of the most important events of their lives. This guy probably had the headache of the century while trying to recite his vows. To top it off, he was sick to his stomach and was probably a sweaty mess. Let's just hope none of that showed up in the wedding pictures!
16 Everything Turned Out Fine
Overthinking is one of man's greatest weaknesses. Instead of focusing on the fact that he was about to marry the woman of his dreams, he was freaking out about the role he felt he would need to play. The thing is, when you love someone, being a husband is no different from being a boyfriend. Being a father to her kids isn't that different from being their friend. All he has to do is play with them, guide them when they need it, encourage them, and occasionally discipline them. It's not as difficult as most people might assume, so, like most people who overthink things, this groom discovered everything was just fine. He may have freaked himself out for a minute there, but ultimately he made the best choice - to stick around as a good husband and father figure.
15 Awwwww <3
This groom was so engrossed in his wife's eyes and their future together that her beautiful dress, flawless makeup, and perfect hair didn't even phase him. She got all dolled up so he could admire her beauty - and so their guests could too - but his heart for her was so great that he looked past it all. Not all weddings are so perfect that the bride and groom can't see anything but each other, but this groom definitely loved his new bride enough to phase everything else out. Even the language he uses is romantic! What a lucky girl! Maybe she's one of those pampered women who are so loved that their men spoil them! *Sigh* Love sure is a beautiful thing, isn't it?
14 What A Catch...
Wow. This guy is the definition of a jerk! If partying was so important to him, he should have married a woman willing to party with him! Just because they're getting married it doesn't mean he can't still go out to the club with his boys and that he has to suddenly change his interests! Ladies, gentlemen, when you get married, the only thing that changes is your legal marriage status! Getting married doesn't mean you suddenly have to start dressing and acting conservatively! It doesn't mean everything in your life needs to change 180 degrees and it certainly doesn't mean you suddenly need to develop entirely new interests! If this guy is too dumb to realize that, then this marriage likely won't work out and he'll be right back in the party lifestyle anyway.
13 That's Just Wrong
This is both sad and just plain messed up. This guy is so desperate to have someone that he doesn't even care who it is. It makes him sound like a jerk, but the reality is he's just really sad. Loneliness damages a person. Most of us weren't meant to spend our lives alone. Some of us have so much love to give and all we really need is someone to accept it. This guy found a woman who was willing to accept him as he is and to absorb the amazing amount of love he has to pour out. Thankfully, she loves him and, because he doesn't ever want to be alone, it's a guarantee he'll do whatever it takes to keep her by his side. It may not be true love, but if anyone was to settle, this situation would be the way to do it.
True love is definitely not skin deep, which is why you see some celebrity couples and can't help but raise an eyebrow. When you love someone, only a fraction of that feeling is based on physical attraction. You may fall for someone because they're hot, but when you choose to stay with them, it's because they make you laugh, they share similar interests, and they compliment your lifestyle. Beauty isn't worth dealing with a drama queen or some trashy woman who demands to be treated like a princess just because she knows she could find a new man in a hot minute. This man may have thought his wife looked hideous in her dress, but he loved her anyway, and at the end of the day, that's all that really matters anyway.
Why do people get married if they're not in love? Why do people lie to their significant others and decide it's better to just be with them than get out and look for the real loves of their lives? This guy was thinking of some other woman, who was likely unavailable to him, and instead of just dealing with the fact that he couldn't be with her and set out in search of someone he could actually love, he settled. When people settle, they're shortchanging themselves and their significant others. No relationship can work if only one person is in love. Let's hope he either gets over that other woman and actually falls in real love with his wife, or hope the false marriage falls apart sooner, rather than later, to spare them both the pain and extraordinary waste of time.
10 Lucky Man...
What a brave woman! It makes sense for people to be nervous but to go as far as throwing up in their mouth!? How awful! He likely looked so sick in that moment. Let's all hope that their first kiss wasn't a french-kiss because she might have actually gotten sick in that moment! Like most couples, she was able to laugh it off later and decided the disgusting act wasn't worth leaving him at the altar. While some couples can reminisce about their beautiful wedding day going off without a hitch, these two will get to laugh about it for years to come. Guaranteed any kids they have will all know the story of how dad kissed mom and almost made her puke all over her gorgeous white gown, right there in front of all their family and friends!
Weddings are special events for some people, and just another excuse to party for others. Some people hate them and some are willing to go through with the expense and formalities for the sake of their bride or groom. This guy, for whatever reason, hates weddings, but at least he had the class to lie about it and tell his wife that he loved it. Lying isn't always the best for any kind of relationship but his words likely mean the world to his wife. Little white lies, for the sake of a person's feelings, are okay every now and then, and this is definitely an excellent example of a lie worth telling. Not only does it earn him a few extra points with the wife, but it also makes him sound a lot more romantic than he is.
Grooms aren't the only ones who cheat. This husband-to-be was seriously thinking his gorgeous bride-to-be would run out on him on their wedding day. That thought does not bode well for their relationship, but setting that aside for a moment, she actually showed up and likely had no clue that he doubted her. If she knew, she might not have followed through with the ceremony. Who wants to be with someone who always questions their loyalty? Either this guy is crazy paranoid or his girl was flying red flags all over the place. Was she still in touch with her ex? Were they meeting up? Did he find secret messages on her Facebook? Or was he just concerned that he wasn't good enough and really thought that he might wind up alone? Whatever the reason, let's hope he worked out his issues.
7 LOL But For Real, That's Sad
At least he was able to pull it off, right? So long as he didn't let loose during the first dance or at any point in the ceremony, this guy did what so many of us couldn't - he held it in and stuck it out through the entire wedding process. Guaranteed he had to take a quick break before the wedding photos, where he was sure to have looked much improved, but man did this guy learn the lesson of his life! Never trust gas station burritos, no matter how tasty they may appear. Whether the bride knew what was going on or not remains a mystery, but if he ever admitted the truth to her, at least they'd have plenty to laugh about on their anniversaries!
6 She Deserves Better
Well, if he's been loyal since they got married, then he isn't that much of a scumbag, now is he? Wrong! It's one thing to cheat on someone you supposedly love, but it's something altogether different when you cheat then stop and act like nothing was ever wrong! The poor bride probably has no idea why her bestie suddenly stopped wanting to hang out after the wedding! She has no clue that the man she just pledged her life to broke his vows before they were even officially wed! Just because he's playing a good guy now doesn't mean he won't suddenly decide to get a side chick or two after a while, when he realizes he's getting bored with the same woman every single day. Hopefully, her "friend" will come out with the truth so this poor bride knows exactly what she's dealing with.
5 True Love Wins!
We'll never know why this groom was questioning whether marrying the love of his life was the right thing to do, but there are several situations that can help make sense of his story. Sometimes people want to get married simply because the girl got pregnant, other times it's due to an arrangement made when they were still children or it was a spur-of-the-moment decision and neither person is truly committed to the relationship. The thing about getting married is that it's so easy to do but the consequences aren't. Luckily for this guy, he went through with the marriage and has truly found his soulmate. The relationship is doing well and whatever doubt he had are back in the past, where they belong. Good for this guy!
4 You Did It!
No matter how much time has past, when someone hurts us in a relationship, we tend to carry that little chip on our shoulder for life. If one person cheats, we find ourselves suspicious for absolutely no reason in the relationships to follow. It's a tough mindset to break away from and this guy was struggling hard. The difference between our past relationships and our current ones are vast, but the largest change is in ourselves. People grow and mature with time, and whatever went sour in this guy's past relationship was easily avoided in his current one because he knew what signs to look for and how to deal with things before they got out of hand. These lessons are likely why his marriage worked out in the end.
When two people decide to get married, most people think, "Okay, this is it. This couple is going to make it and their love will be the stuff of fairy tales and blah, blah, blah. The reality is just because a couple has decided to get married, there's still plenty of room for things to go south. What if she's a bridezilla and has so many meltdowns that the groom decides to peace out? What if the groom is having a secret affair and decides not to go through with the wedding at the last minute? There are so many what-if scenarios! In this person's case, he was likely considering the many ways in which his bride-to-be would leave him. It's almost sweet that he was so nervous he became physically ill. Good thing she showed up and everything went well for this poor guy!
2 How Romantic...Not!
It's good that this groom wasn't trying to step out on his brand new wife, but it's kind of disappointing to learn that he wasn't excited at all about the wedding. Even if two people live together for years, there's still something special about legitimizing the relationship on a legal level. A wedding is a celebration and is usually a day most people look forward to from childhood. This guy was happy to be with his wife, which is good in the long run, but thinking of having a wedding just to get the formalities out of the way is a bit harsh. Good thing he told his wife it was just nerves, otherwise, he could have ruined one of the most important days of her life!
1 Take It To Your Grave
Nothing says "I love you" like getting married, and nothing says "I'll love you forever" like nearly stepping from the altar to make a spectacle of yourself with a bridesmaid on your wedding day. This guy doesn't love his new bride, he just chose the better of two paths, who cares that she'll likely wind up hurt and their entire marriage will fall apart, right? Why do people do this to each other!? If he didn't love her unconditionally and with all his being, why did he agree to marry her? Why would he nearly back out at the last minute? Was it jitters or did he have a thing going on the side that he wasn't sure he wanted to end? Whatever his reasons, for the sake of his wife's feelings and their entire relationship, he'd better keep quiet.