When a relationship feels like it’s over, it’s probably over. If something is ending then it needs to end, not get dragged out for decades until there’s irreparable damage done to both of you. Unfortunately, this doesn't always happen. While people might think that they’re doing the right thing by “trying to make it work”, this actually ends up with much more sadness and pain in the long-run. Oftentimes we see the guys in the relationships compromising their beliefs and wants in life because they’re too worried about what might happen if they left. Sometimes they’re scared of being without someone, sometimes they’re worried they’ll never find anything better… Sometimes they’re just plain scared and don’t know how to leave someone. In a few of these cases, there’s even more dramatic stuff going on, which is hard to believe when reading it for the first time. There’s a million reasons why people will stay unhappy in relationships, and all it takes is the anonymity of the internet to bring it out. These men have revealed their deepest regrets, worries, and confessions, and all we have to say is… Wow. We sure hope the men in our lives behave a little bit better than these ones.
19 It's The Parent Trap That Many Failing Relationships Fall Into
Rooky mistake, but one that so many relationships fall into. While you might think that having a child is the best way to save your relationship, it’s actually one of the worst. Kids are really rough on couples, and they tend to give you more stress and tension than they solve. While you might think that a baby is a surefire way to celebrate you and your partner and to create a little spark of life that’s going to bring you two closer together, all the literature says differently. This guy should have divorced, rather than agreeing (or even suggesting) to have a baby. The last thing you need in an unhealthy, unhappy relationship is more difficulty getting out of that relationship. He definitely seems like he regrets it, and we don’t know what he’s going to do.
18 Some Guys Never Grow Up
Firstly, if you’re with someone just because you want a live-in maid, you’re not in a relationship for the right reason. Clearly, you have no idea how to respect another human being’s time, love, or capacity for support, and you probably will never learn. While some people might not mind cleaning up other people’s messes, we don’t know anyone in their right mind who’d sign up to do it for the rest of their life. That’s twice the mess and twice the effort, and they’re just one person. Two bodies can create a lot of mess, and most people don’t even like cleaning up their own mess… Especially this guy, apparently, who sounds like he regrets nothing about staying in this relationship (even though he shouldn’t be in it in the first place!)
17 This Guy Couldn't Figure Out How To Cope... And Now They're Both Stuck
This is a hard one to read. It’s difficult to know what you need when you’re dealing with a big tragedy in your life. It sounds like this guy never regretted a moment he spent with his first wife. That’s quickly changed with the second, though. He probably did rush in to too much too fast, which can sometimes happen when your system has had a shock like losing your significant other. At least he knows now that he needed more time to grieve rather than just moving on. If he and his current wife are in a good place, then the should be able to talk to her about it. She should understand that he’s dealing with stuff still, and she’ll be able to help him through. That is unless he decides what he really needs is separation.
16 Sometimes The Side Girl Really Is Your True Love (Just Don't Tell The Wife)
This is a confession that we have some mixed feelings about. While we’re glad that this guy is finally getting his life together, it makes us feel gross that he spent so long lying to his wife. It sounds like they’ve been together for a long time if this side girl has been around for 16 years. Just imagine that… That’s longer than most marriages! We have to wonder why it took him so long to leave his wife. Maybe he thought he was in love with both of them, and wanted to keep the commitment up at first. Clearly, his “true love” (aka his side girl) won out, and he’s finally worked up the nerve to tell her. While we’re sad that the relationship ended, we’re glad that everyone is happy… And that he’s finally being honest.
15 Guilt Is Basically Poison When It Comes To Relationships
This is just gross. Honestly, we don’t blame this guy for feeling bad and regretful about staying with this girl. We’ve heard countless confessions about partners blackmailing their partners into staying with them, and we have zero respect for it. Especially when it’s something as serious and dramatic as this. We don’t believe that you should stay with someone who threatens to end it all if you’re going to leave. That doesn’t make for a safe, supportive relationship. It turns it into an obligation, and literally puts someone’s life in their partner’s hands. That partner is then going to live in fear, and even feel responsible if it were to happen. Our advice? Leave this lady before something happens. If she’s going to end it, she’ll end it regardless of if you’re around or not.
14 Sometimes The Regret Fades As The Situations Change
Sometimes the relationship changes as the life events affecting the relationship change. It’s like people. People change as they get older, have more experiences, learn new information about themselves and the world. In this case, this couple felt that they maybe weren’t the best match when they were together and dealing with this big event. He probably felt like he was with her out of obligation rather than an actual want. Luckily that changed as she got better. The sickness brought them together, and the more they worked on themselves and stuck the relationship out, the more they saw life partners in each other. It’s really lovely, and we wish more relationships worked out like this. What a great turn around for this guy to have!
13 Divorce Was Invented Specifically For This Reason
This is rough. This was actually a three-part confession, and the other two gave some more to the story. Apparently, the guy had planned a fun getaway weekend with his partner, roommate, and their best friend. It was on this trip he planned to propose, but then didn’t. At the end of the trip when they were packing was when she found the ring, and he didn’t want to make the trip back to town “awkward”. He’s apparently planning to leave her before the actual wedding, which we support. In fact, we’d recommend that he leave ASAP; the sooner the better when it comes to a lifelong commitment such as marriage. If you’re having second thoughts that persist, think about why you’re doing it. Maybe the better option is to leave, rather than committing for life.
12 NEVER Let Other People Decide Whether Or Not You Should Stay With Your Partner
How gross do you have to be to hate your wife? While we understand that sometimes people grow to hate their significant others as they change and develop as people, it seems like getting married to someone just because your family and friends like them is a very bad choice. You’re the one that has to live with this person full-time, not your best friend or your mother. This guy made a bad choice from the beginning, and now he’s living with the repercussions. We hope that he’s feeling guilty about these feelings he has and is planning on coming clean soon. It’s not like his family and friends will hate him for leaving this girl. There’ll be other people they get along with, and they should all want him to be happiest. If that means leaving his wife, he should definitely get on it.
11 Always Listen To That Little Feeling That Says You Don't Like Someone
Sir, if you didn’t like her from the start, why did you propose to her? Why did you even continue to keep dating her? Was it just because it felt easier to stay than to try and find someone new? Or was it because you thought you’d fall more in love as time went on? Call us old-fashioned, but we think you should be in love with the person you’re planning on marrying. At the very least you should respect them and like them as a friend. This guy might have had that with her at one point, but we would find it hard to believe. Not to mention the fact that he broke up with her just because she turned into “bridezilla”. You should be able to talk to your partner about their behavior if it makes you uncomfortable, not leave them without any warning!
10 That Moment In Time When Your Worst Fear Is You Turning Into Your Parent
We respect this guy for wanting to do the right thing, but it sounds like he absolutely regrets his choice… And we don’t blame him. Like the first confession, he might have thought that this was the angel that was going to save the relationship. Kids never are though, especially if they’re “the worst”, as our confessor says. It’s almost more like the kid turns into a physical reminder of your stupidity and poor choices rather than being a reminder of your love and passion for each other. Plus, did the guy not realize that he could be involved in his kid’s life without having to be with the mother? It sounds like everyone would have been better off leading their own lives, and intersecting only to support their baby.
9 Here's A Hint... LEAVE HER!
Oh man, dude. Stop being wishy-washy and start putting your foot down! Make a strong choice and don’t put it off any longer than you have to. The longer you wait, the worse it’s going to be; we know that we’d rather have someone say “I’m having doubts” than to look at us months later and go "I haven’t loved you since that Tuesday afternoon 3 months ago and most of this has been a lie." Wouldn’t you prefer to have it cut off right away than to live with all that false belief? This guy definitely needs to get his act together and end things so they can both go off and live happy, independent lives. It might hurt in the short term, but trust us… Leaving will way better than doing what half of these guys have done.
8 This Guy Is Using Her, And We Hope She's Made It Stop
We know it’s easy to get caught in the breakup/ make-up cycle. There’s something about the coming together again that’s almost addicting, in a way. The excitement of starting anew is only comparable to the deliciousness of a fresh relationship. You get to recapture the glow of those first three months, all by reconnecting with the person you’ve been seeing all along. However, when you do this as a ploy to keep the relationship fresh and exciting, we believe it starts to turn into the using someone territory. Nobody likes that. It’s disrespectful, and means that you don’t actually care about the relationship: you just care about the excitement of something new. That’s not a reason to continue seeing someone. Let them go so they can move on, and stop using people to fulfill your own passionate desires.
7 Sometimes You're Better Off Just Ending It... Or Else THIS Could Happen
This is one of the most common things that happens when you’re dealing with a dying relationship. This guy thought he could deal with the lackluster love, and maybe even salvage it eventually when his life started to calm down. Unfortunately, he just ended up doing something even worse. It’s always going to stink to get broken up with, but it’s going to be more permanently damaging to know that you were cheated on. Not only does it mean your relationship is over (usually), but it means the trust you had in this person was totally broken. No doubt everyone involved in this story is wishing that it had gone differently. We know we’re wishing that, and we don’t even know the guy! At least… We hope we don’t know him. You never know with these confessions.
6 Your Wife Should Never Be A Placeholder For "Something Better"
If you’ve decided to make someone your wife, you’re committing to them for the rest of your life. You’re saying “I love this person, and I want the world to know how much they mean to me”. You’re not saying “this is some girl I’m seeing until someone better appears”. That’s just not how marriage works. While we support people who do feel that they’re satisfied committing to someone despite a lack of passion, we think that’s a totally different beast from what this guy is doing. No doubt he’s going to regret this in a few years when he does meet something better, and then has to break the news to his wife… And then there’s the whole mess of divorce! While he might not regret it now, he’ll definitely regret it soon.
5 Be A Support System, But Don't Be A Therapist
While it seems honorable on the surface, it’s actually more damaging than it seems. Not only is he now stuck in an unhappy situation, the girl who’s involved in this is also stuck dealing with yet another relationship in which she’s using her partner as her only support system. Therapists are professionals for a reason; they’re there to help you, and to help you deal with things that might later affect your relationship. If you turn every partner you have into your therapist, you’re not actually building healthy relationships. You’re just using people for free emotional support. While your partner should be able to be there for you, you also need to be there for them. It’s a two way street, and that doesn’t include them helping you while you don’t help them.
4 Maturity Changes Many Things... Including College Romances
This confession actually gives us a lot of hope. Ending college is a big change, and it’s startling how much you change as a person when you’re finally out of the college lifestyle. You start to feel like more of an adult, and that adultness in turn affects your old relationships. Friends who have never really grown up start to drift away from you, and your college partner might not be what you want for the rest of your life. Adult, you all of a sudden needs to decide if you want to make the relationship work, or end it. Oftentimes people decide to end it, but this confession is proof that you can make things work! We love the idea of growing into another person-- because yes, you do change. But so does your partner. You just need to figure out how to change together!
3 Almost Everything Can Be Worked Through, If You Two Are Committed
This one is really sweet, and should give anyone who’s feeling guilty out there a little bit of hope. If you’re meant to be with someone, and you work towards being with them, you’re never going to lose out on it… No matter what happens between you two in the relationship. No doubt she felt bad about cheating, and he probably felt that the relationship was over. While “begrudgingly” is a strong word, he must have felt some sort of desire to make things work, or else it never would have worked. She learned from her mistakes too, by the sounds of it, and now they’re so happy together. We love it, and we love the fact that he’s so in love with her now. Hopefully they’ll stay together, and there’ll be another ten years of happiness for them.
2 At Least This Guy Knows That It's Time To Go
On the flip side of the last confession, this guy has learned that even if you try to make things work, if it’s not meant to be it won’t work out. They’re just too different, or want different things, or are heading in life directions that are just too opposite. Instead of begrudgingly staying and making each other’s lives miserable, they’ve learned that they’re better off ending things. And we agree! We would rather have them dealing with semi-broken hearts and detangling their lives rather than dealing with resentment and hatred towards each other and their prospective futures. That’s what a lot of these confessions boil down to: people knowing and trusting that they’re better off without these negative relationships, rather than just putting up with them.
1 And Finally... The Guy That Did Leave (And Regrets That!)
Talk about turning all these confessions on their heads! This guy is one of the rare ones who actually regrets leaving. While we hope that some of these confessors get their act together and do end up leaving their partners, we can’t say the same for this guy; he already did it. It’s hard to go back and ask for forgiveness too, which is probably why he hasn’t tried reintegrating into his ex’s life. Once you leave, you’re basically gone forever. Especially if you did something rotten like skip town. Hopefully, his regret allows him to swallow his pride and reach out to his kid. If they want to find him, they will. Maybe then the family will get back together. Or at least, he and his unknown child will be able to connect.