Sometimes, a relationship just does not work out the way that we had originally planned. You may meet someone and fall head over heels for them, thinking that you have a real future together. But unfortunately, not every relationship can have a fairytale ending. Not every single couple is meant to be together. We break up apart for different reasons—we may realize that the other person has actually been mistreating us, we may see that we were never right for each other from the start and we were just wearing rose-colored glasses.
Or it may not be a mutual decision. He might be the one who makes the final call and decides that he is going to walk away. It’s heartbreaking, but it happens all the time, even in relationships that seemed perfect on the outside. Occasionally, you’ll be glad for a relationship to end because you will both recognize that it wasn’t working out, but other times, it will feel like he’s giving up on everything you worked so hard to build. But how do you know if it’s really and truly over? Here are 18 signs that you’ve lost the love of your life, and he’s not coming back.
18 He’s Already Seeing Someone Else
After a breakup, there may be some time when you think about whether or not you could get back together. Sometimes this works out, sometimes it doesn’t. But if he already has someone else lined up right after you break up, you need to accept that it’s over. Some people are serial monogamists. They are always shopping around for potential new flings, even while in a relationship, just because they can’t stand the thought of being alone when it’s over. It’s a bad habit, and many people are guilty of doing this. If you were dating a guy who always has a backup girl ready immediately after a breakup, there is no chance you’re getting him back because he already “moved on” long before the breakup.
17 He Deletes You Off Of Social Media
Social media has a big presence in relationships these days. Of course, you naturally will follow each other, you’ll send each other funny videos and pictures on Snapchat, you may set a relationship status on Facebook, and you’ll probably post photos of each other on Instagram. However, this means that social media will also matter when it comes time to break up. If you want to broadcast your relationship to the world when you’re happy, it might come back to bite you when it’s all over! If a guy blocks you on social media after a breakup or a fight, it means that he does not want to risk seeing you even if it’s a just a photo that he scrolls past on his feed—and it’s definitely over.
16 He Asks For His Hoodies Back
We all know that one of the best parts of dating a guy is stealing his hoodies. Somehow, all the hoodies designed for men are way comfier than the hoodies sold for girls. We can’t explain it, but it’s true, and every girl knows it! Naturally, this means that when you’re dating a guy, you’re going to “borrow” quite a few of his hoodies and try to hold on for them as long as possible. But what happens when you break up? Well, if he asks for his stuff back immediately, it’s time to give up on any hopes you had of getting back together because it’s not happening. If he wants all of his hoodies back (and anything else you might have “borrowed”), it means he’s over you.
15 He Imagines A Separate Future
Okay, this is really hurtful if it comes up while you’re still in the relationship. If you want to be with someone for the long haul, you need to be on the same page about the future. Whether this means moving to the same area or traveling, having kids or staying childfree, living near family or moving across the country, there are certain key things that both partners need to agree on. If you notice that every single time he talks about the future, he’s saying something completely different than what you had ever imagined, it’s a sure sign that you’re headed for a breakup. If you can’t agree on your future, the relationship will not survive. This can be very hard to accept, but it’s the truth.
14 He Starts Acting Shady
So, how do we define “acting shady?” Basically, it means that a guy is hiding things from you, and you’re not just being paranoid. For example, he won’t always tell you where he is or who he’s with, he gets super secretive about his phone and laptop, you never seem to know who he’s texting at all hours of the day, or you hear rumors about him that he simply refuses to address. These could all qualify as “acting shady.” In many cases, this means that the relationship is over before it has even truly ended. If a man cannot be truthful with you, it’s a very bad sign. Trust and honesty are absolutely essential for any successful relationship, and if you can’t trust him, he’s not worth it.
13 He Picks Fights Over Nothing
This is typically a sign that the guy is looking for an easy way out. If he is constantly picking fights over little things, he probably wants to break up, but he’s too scared to just have a conversation about it. This is a common tactic, and both girls and guys do it sometimes! Basically, he might get angry over something very silly, like you forgetting to pick up something at the store, answering a text late, or making plans with your friends on a Friday night instead of with him. These are all examples of totally normal things to do, but if a guy is always freaking out about things like these, it is a sure signal that he is unhappy in the relationship.
12 He’s Texting His Ex
Oh, man, this one is basically the kiss of death. Yes, it is possible to be friends with an ex, but it is rare. And if one does choose to be friends with an ex, they should be very conscious of how their current partner might feel about it. It’s so tough to maintain a real friendship with an ex because old romantic feelings or resentment could bubble up at any time. So if a guy is always texting his ex, it does not spell good things for your relationship. It means that he is probably missing the past and dwelling on it, and that for whatever reason, he does not feel fulfilled by your current relationship. He could be on his way out the door soon.
11 He Never Makes Time For Date Nights
In the beginning of a relationship, you probably go on fun dates and make plans all the time. But over time, couples often put in less effort when it comes to doing fun things together. They may stop going on dates, or get totally lazy about how they spend time together. It could easily turn into an endless cycle of takeout and Netflix, night after night, week after week. This is how relationships fall into a rut and become boring. If your guy never makes time to go on dates or never wants to make plans with you, your relationship is headed for the rocks. It means that he does not care about spending quality time with you or doing things that you both will enjoy.
10 He Changes His Passwords
Well, this definitely falls under the category of “acting shady!” This is just one specific example of behavior that could mean a guy is over your relationship. Let’s say that in the beginning of your relationship, he was super comfortable with you using his phone or sitting with him while he did something on his laptop. If that suddenly ends and he gets very protective of everything he does online, something is definitely wrong. And if he takes an extra step and changes his passwords, especially if he was comfortable with you having access to his phone and social media before, something fishy is going on! This most likely means that he is talking to another girl and is not being honest with you about it.
9 He Makes Fun Of Your Interests
This is so mean! However, there are many guys out there who will do this. Some men don’t see their girlfriends’ interests as valid. For example, let’s say that you are very feminine, and you really enjoy shopping and makeup—you may see fashion and makeup as a hobby of yours, but he might not. There are lots of guys who will make fun of their girlfriends’ interests, and it is the kiss of death for a relationship. You need someone who will support your hobbies, your goals, your career—you see what we’re saying! You don’t want to be with a guy who puts down the things that you’re interested in because he will not be truly supportive of you when you’re trying to achieve your dreams.
8 He Forgets Important Dates
When you’re really looking forward to your birthday or an important anniversary, it feels so hurtful when the guy involved just totally forgets! Maybe you were really hoping for a fun surprise, or at least a nice dinner date, and instead, he doesn’t even say anything about it! Remembering important dates is really very simple. It doesn’t take much effort to write it down on a calendar or put a reminder in your phone. If a guy can’t remember your anniversary or your birthday, it may be a major sign that he has lost interest. Trust us, there are guys out there who WILL remember every important date without any nagging, and they are worth holding out for, so don’t feel like you need to settle.
7 He Doesn’t Support Your Career
Relationships are all about compromise. Sometimes, one of you will have an amazing opportunity, and the other will have to put in a little extra effort to support them. For instance, let’s say that you get a job opportunity that means working long hours, but it’s for your dream job, so you want to take it. In this situation, a loving boyfriend would be willing to step up and plan out some date nights and maybe even help you out with some other responsibilities while you adjust to your new schedule. But if your boyfriend suddenly stops supporting your career or rooting for you to achieve your professional goals, he already has his foot halfway out the door, and you definitely deserve better than that.
6 He Gets Jealous When You Hang Out With Friends
This is totally unacceptable. Whenever you date someone, you obviously want to spend a lot of time together. But after the “honeymoon” phase ends, you often realize that you don’t need to be dependent on each other 24/7, and you both need to spend some time with your own separate friend groups on a regular basis as well. However, let’s say that even after you’ve been dating for a while, a guy still does not accept when you need to have a day with your girls. This is a sign of serious jealousy, and he could turn out to be quite controlling. It also might mean that he does not trust you or thinks you are not loyal. These are all glaring red flags, and no matter how much you love the guy, it won’t work out.
5 He Never Seems Happy
When you first begin dating someone, everything feels like sunshine and roses—as we mentioned earlier, this is typically referred to as “the honeymoon phase.” You are just so excited to be together that you are both super happy all of the time. It’s blissful, but it doesn’t last forever. After a while, you both settle down a bit, things are more stable, and while you still love each other, you’re not constantly sending each other mushy texts or staying up all night on the phone. However, if a guy all of the sudden seems to be super unhappy after the honeymoon phase, it probably means that he realized the relationship was not right for him in the first place, and he had his rose-colored glasses on before.
4 He Isn’t Physically Affectionate
Ouch. One of the best parts of being in a relationship is physical affection. There is nothing better than coming home at the end of a long day to see your boyfriend and getting a hug and a kiss. It just makes you feel loved and accepted. As human beings, we’re literally wired to crave physical contact. Something as simple as a hug or holding hands can actually have a big positive impact on your overall mood! So when you’ve been dating someone for a while and suddenly, they are no longer physically affectionate towards you, you need to consider that the relationship may not be working out. This generally means that the guy is losing interest in you and might not be attracted to you anymore.
3 He Ignores Your Texts And Calls
Now, replying to texts late or missing the occasional phone call is not something to worry about. You don’t need to freak out about things like that—we’re all human, and sometimes we forget to pick up the phone or answer a text. It happens to even the most organized among us. However, if a guy is consistently ignoring your texts or calls, something is definitely wrong. It is not normal to behave this way towards someone you are dating. In fact, the vast majority of the time that something like this happens, it means he is seeing someone else on the side. If you’re going through a situation like this, your relationship is in for a rough ride, and the guy might be over it already.
2 He Never Wants To Treat You To Anything
We’ve all been broke before—when you’re young, you typically do not have enough money to do all the things you really want to do! And it’s not okay to treat your boyfriend like your bank account, so complaining that he can’t always buy you the things that you want just makes you sound ungrateful. But on the other hand, unless one of you is in a truly dire financial situation, it’s nice to treat each other to something once in a while. If your man has money in the bank and has a decent job, yet he suddenly does not want to spend even a little bit of money on you, it’s not looking good. You should both want to treat each other sometimes if you can afford it.
1 He Stops Saying “I Love You”
If a guy stops telling you that he loves you, it’s probably over, and you’ve already lost him. Telling someone that you love them is actually the bare minimum in a happy relationship because you need to show the other person that you love them too. So if a guy stops even just telling you that he loves you, well, it’s, unfortunately, safe to say that his feelings for you have probably faded. You can’t persuade someone into loving you back—if he no longer feels the same way, you can either give it a little time to try and fix things, or you can let him go. In many cases, simply letting him go is the easiest way to move on and go forward with your life.