Most of us dream of getting married to an awesome guy one day and possibly starting a family. We all want our “happily ever after” fairytale, right? Of course! But unfortunately, sometimes the story that starts out looking like a fairy tale doesn’t have the happy ending that we always imagined. Not every man is going to commit to you and fall in love with you the way that you want him to—and sometimes, we end up with the wrong guy.
Men can keep just as many secrets as women do, and sometimes, we have no idea what the guy we’re in love with could be hiding from us. Even if you get married one day, there is no guarantee that the guy who put a ring on your finger will always be honest with you or tell you the truth. It’s scary to think about, but we have to recognize that this is the reality of relationships.
So, what kind of secrets could a married man be hiding behind the scenes? Well, that’s what we’re about to reveal to you. Here are 16 juicy confessions that these dads definitely do not want their wives and kids finding out.
16 Two Months Is Hardly Anything...
Many couples have to decide whether their child’s mother or father will stay at home to raise their child for the first couple months. Traditionally, the mother was always expected to stay home with their baby, and while some moms were totally happy with this arrangement, many others weren’t. Now, we’ve definitely made some progress in this area, and many more dads are choosing to stay at home with their kids and take an equal part in raising their kids. However, this man says that he chose to be a stay at home dad, and he is not super happy with the arrangement. In fact, he says that at first, he thought he could handle it, but after only two months, he hates it already.
15 He Probably Shouldn't Have Had Kids Then
Having children can be an extremely rewarding choice. Many people say that although their lives have changed dramatically after having a child, they still would not go back to their old life for anything. Kids can be crazy, but the feeling you get when you see your kid walk for the first time, say their first words, head off to school on their first day of kindergarten...you can’t get that feeling from anything else. But despite all the positive aspects of having kids and raising a family, this lifestyle is definitely not right for everyone. The dad who wrote this confession says that while he does love his kids very much, he does regret becoming a dad sometimes. It takes so much hard work and patience—it’s never going to be easy.
14 We Hardly Doubt There's NO Reward
Remember how we just mentioned that some people find raising kids super rewarding, despite all of the hardship that comes along with it? While this may be true for many parents, it is certainly not true for all. Our society definitely promotes the idea that everyone should have kids, and it’s only recently that many more people are choosing to go against the grain and stay childfree. However, lots of people who should not become parents are still having kids because they have always been told that it’s “the right thing to do.” That’s pretty much what happened to the dad who wrote this confession—he says that parenthood is all about hard work and sacrifice, but for him, this is not a fulfilling experience at all.
13 News Flash: Nobody Knows What They're Doing
Well, we’ve got good news for the dad who wrote this confession—we’re pretty sure that every parent feels like they’re doing it wrong! And the funny thing is that the parents who worry the most are often the ones who are doing the best job. The fact that they are always considering how they could do better proves that they always keep their kid’s best interests in mind. This dad is super worried that he’s not a good parent. He says that this anxiety makes him dislike being a father. But honestly, this will probably get easier as his kids get older. Being a parent is never a simple task, and if it was, it wouldn’t really be worth doing! Raising kids will always be a challenge, no matter what.
12 Stop Worrying What Other People Think!
We’ve already discussed how it’s becoming more and more common for men to stay at home with their kids. Maybe someday, we will even see equal numbers of stay at home dads and stay at home moms—who knows? However, there is one thing that still holds many men back from staying at home with their kids. There is definitely a stigma attached to being a stay at home dad. For so long, this was seen as a role that only women were suited for, and a man staying home with the kids would have been considered very strange. The stereotypes are slowly starting to change, but this man says that he still faces a lot of judgment for being a stay at home dad, which is making him regret his choice.
11 His Life Is Just One Big Regret
There is truly almost nothing that is worse than the pain of regret. We will all have some regrets in life—we won’t always make the right choices, and no one can completely avoid mistakes. However, the man who wrote this confession has some pretty heavy regrets. Keeping these secrets inside must feel like carrying a very heavy burden. He says that if he could start his life all over again, he would never have gotten married OR had kids at all. Wow. This is genuinely heartbreaking to read, because we’re sure that his wife and kids probably pick up on the fact that he is not happy. This is why not everyone needs to follow the traditional path—some people would be very unhappy if they were married with kids!
10 20s Are Over-Rated Anyways...
While this man does not totally regret getting married or having kids like some of the dads in previous confessions, he does wish that he and his wife had waited longer to start a family. They had children in their early twenties, and now that the kids are a few years older, this man says that he feels like he has wasted his twenties. Your twenties are a time to travel, work hard, date new people, and figure out your place in life and which path you want to go down. You do not have to settle down, get married, and have children right away! These are very serious decisions that you should never feel like you have to rush into—after all, if you have a kid, you can’t undo that!
9 You Should Probably Do A Test To Figure This Out
While women do still get the short end of the stick in many ways, even in 2018, men definitely face some struggles of their own. For example, when a woman has a child, there is never any doubt that she is the mother! But when a woman tells a man that she’s pregnant and he’s the father, he may end up having some doubts about whether or not the baby is really his. In this case, the man who wrote this confession does not think that “his” daughter is really his. He suspects that his girlfriend cheated on him and then lied to him so that he would not leave her. Perhaps someday he will be able to get a paternity test and get a final answer.
8 This Guy Needs To Learn To Live In The Moment
Even though most parents truly love spending time with their children, we’re going to bet that many of them have had the same thought before! Especially when their kids are throwing tantrums, smearing food on the walls, waking up in the night crying, or begging for seconds of dessert but refusing to eat their vegetables...you get the idea! So this dad shouldn’t feel too bad for having these thoughts every once in a while. Sure, his kids would probably be pretty upset if they found out that he felt this way, but maybe someday when they get older and have children on their own, they will come to understand his point of view! For now, he’ll just to wait a couple more years to get some peace and quiet.
7 Honesty Is Key In A Relationship
If two people love each other very much, but one really wants children and the other does not, they should not get married, even if they are compatible in every other way. You may be able to compromise on renting an apartment vs. buying a home, living in the city vs. living by the beach, spending your money on a vacation vs. saving a little extra...but you cannot compromise when it comes to children. Having one child is not a compromise between “having kids” or “having no kids.” Why? Because you still have all the responsibilities of taking care of a kid! This man gave in to pressure from wife to have a kid, even though he did not want to—and look where that got him.
6 Husband And Wife Should Probably Live In The Same World
Sometimes, a mother and father will feel very differently about the responsibilities of raising kids. Some people naturally take to their role as a parent and really flourish. They are super invested in their kids and they are happy to change their lifestyle in order to accommodate them. Others resist leaning into this role, and simply are not cut out to be a parent—and there’s nothing wrong with that, except when they ignore those instincts and have a kid anyway! That’s exactly what happened with this couple. While the mother absolutely loves being a mom, the dad who wrote this confession can’t stand being a dad. He says he feels like he and his wife are living in two different worlds—sounds like a recipe for disaster!
5 Cheaters Never Prosper
Well, we were bound to come across a confession like this at some point. Some people truly do not understand the value of commitment, and no matter how much they promise you, they will never be able to treat you the way that you deserve. The dad who wrote this confession is a perfect example. He felt like he could not handle the pressure of being a dad. But instead of focusing on communicating with his wife, improving himself, and perhaps reaching out to people for some extra help, he looked for a release from his troubles elsewhere. He cheated on his wife, and he knows that he will have to tell the truth eventually—when he does, it will most likely be the end of their marriage.
4 Long-Distance Cheating
Ouch. Well, we have to say that we’re relieved we aren’t married to this guy! He says that on the surface, he is happily married. He has a wife who he does care about, and they even have two children together. But deep down, he is actually super unhappy. This guy has been in love with a woman who lives halfway around the world for ten years now! However, maybe he felt that being with this woman was impossible because of the distance, so he settled for someone who he did not really love. Girls, let this be a lesson to you—settling will never be worth it, because you will always spend the rest of your life wondering what it would be like to be with someone else.
3 Not The Way To Start A Marriage
Remember what we just said about not settling? Yup, here is another perfect example of why settling for someone that you do not truly love will never, ever be a good idea. Seriously, ever. The idea of being alone is very scary to the guy who wrote this confession. He fears that no one besides the woman he is married to now would ever want to be with him. But first of all, there are over six billion people on the planet, so he is probably wrong and just needs to get out there and meet more people. He regrets getting married to his wife because he does not actually love her. Don’t stay with someone just because you think that no one else is out there for you!
2 He'll Constantly Wonder What Could Have Been
When you realize that the guy you’re with is in love with someone else, it’s absolutely heartbreaking. No one wants to face this reality. What could be worse than finding out that your boyfriend or husband is actually head over heels for another woman? Finding out that the other woman is actually your best friend. We can’t imagine how hurtful this must feel. This man has confessed that he thinks he would be happier if had married his wife’s best friend instead. If she ever found out, she would probably leave him, but it looks like he has managed to keep it a secret for now. But secrets like this never stay hidden forever—eventually, the truth about his feelings will definitely be coming out.
1 The Romance In The Relationship Is Definitely Gone
When a woman has kids, her body changes in so many unexpected ways. We all know that pregnancy can have a huge impact on your body, and some of those changes may last forever. And that’s okay! The fact that women can create life is such a beautiful thing, even though it is clearly a difficult and painful process. Some men do not appreciate everything that their wives have gone through in order to bring their children into the world. This man says that after his wife gave birth, he no longer found her attractive. But as her husband, he should be loving her for her personality, her actions, and her dedication to her family—not just her looks. This woman has gone through so much—she deserves more appreciation!