You love your man, of course you do, but something seems fishy all of a sudden. There’s just something between him and his best buddy that you can’t quite put your finger on. It almost seems like the two of them are much too close for comfort. They are almost conjoined at the hip in the most uncomfortable way, and you aren’t super cool with it (backrubs…really guys?). It’s bad enough if your guy would cheat on you with another woman, but to cheat on you with the guy that is always hanging around your house would really suck on a whole new level.
Those late night rendezvous they are always going on just don’t seem like they are on the up and up anymore, and whenever his best bud is around you just get a vibe that won’t quit. You also notice the two of them eyeing each other up all the time, even more than your man is eyeing you up—it’s weird and you don’t like it. If this sounds like your situation, you might not be too far off from your suspicion. Your guy might be hooking up with his best friend behind your back. Take a look at the list of tell tale signs we found to be red flags for this situation.
16 His BFF Is In The Closet (But Out To Your Man)
Not to evesdrop, but you’ve “overheard” that your man’s BFF is struggling with his sexuality and is only out to your significant. Why has he only come out to him? Is it because they trust each other or is there something more brewing there? Sure, it can be hard to come out of the closet initially and choosing your audience can be rough to start out, but if the BFF is choosing your significant to come out to and is keeping you out of the loop, it’s a bit of a red flag especially if your man is also keeping you in the dark.
Why wouldn’t he tell his BFF’s girl about what he’s going through? It just seems like an odd situation. If the two of them are keeping this under wraps, it could be because both of them have the same secret between each other.
15 He Is More Emotionally Open To His BFF
So, he’s stone cold to you, but he’ll share every single emotion he has with his BFF. That is weird. You should be in the know when your man is going through an emotional catastrophe, not his best friend. It makes you wonder why he’s running to him versus you. What’s going on between the two of them that you can’t be in on? Plus, since when are men more emotionally open with each other anyway?
It doesn’t mean that they are 100 percent in love with each other, but it does mean that they are emotionally being intimate with each other, which is something you should be doing with your man. If he doesn’t act this way with you, this is when you should worry. Make sure you key into this.
14 He Has Phone Convos At Odd Hours
It’s one thing to be on the phone with your best friend, but to be on the phone after midnight or first thing in the morning consistently is a little weird don’t you think? Obviously you’re going to talk to your buddies on the phone, but you aren’t going to talk at odd hours on the regular. They are clearly hiding something; they don’t want you to hear whatever they are talking about.
What they might be talking about is a secret relationship between the two of them. Why else would they be so hell bent on sneaking off to chat all the time? Don’t tell me they are always planning a surprise birthday just for you. Not happening. Bring this one up to your man, if he has nothing to hide he’ll cut out the behavior, right?
13 He’s A New Person In Front Of His BFF
Ever notice him totally doing a full 180-degree change whenever his buddy walks in the room? Kind of weird, right? Is he kind of distant with you then is the life of the party when his buddy comes walking in? If so, red flag big time. If he is lighting up more when his friend walks in more so than when you are around, you have to wonder what makes his friend so special and you so not.
What kind of connection are these two sharing that you and your man aren’t? You would think that he’d want to be around you and he would be lighting up the world with you by his side rather than when his best friend walks in the room. Could be because their vibes are feeding off each other in a romantic way.
12 He Needs More Guy Time…With Just One Person
So he claims he needs more “guy time” huh? The question is where are all of the other guys and why is it always his best friend involved and not any other guys? It’s kind of an odd situation when he wants to escape into the arms of another man for lack of better words rather than spending time with you. It would be one thing if he would be spending time with a group of his buddies, but he isn’t. this situation isn’t normal.
In this instance, confront him right away and ask if you can come along. If he gets defensive and says no…something’s going on. Why wouldn’t you be able to go along every now and then? Sure, your man and his BFF would want to hang every now and then, but if this is happening on the regular it’s not okay.
11 Your Friends Notice That The Pair Are Conjoined At The Hip
Is your man and his best friend spending so much time together that even your friends are noticing it? It’s pretty bad when your girls are wondering why the two of them are spending so much bro time together when they aren’t even around your place all that often. The guys shouldn’t be a topic of conversation, and if they are it’s something you want to be looking into.
Maybe they are spending too much time together, but why? Have you ever asked your man why he needs to spend so much time with his best friend and why that time can’t be spent with you instead? Not to put the kibosh on their time together, but enough is enough, you know? There has to be an ending point somewhere…unless they are in love.
10 He’s Dropping Major Bills On His BFF
Ummm…what? What reason would justify him spending a bunch of bills on his best friend other than they are secret lovers? Come on now. Unless his best friend is in a desperate situation and needs your man to loan him some money with the full intention of paying him back, there is no reason whatsoever that your significant should be spending some major cash on him.
Here’s the thing, think about your early dating days. Your man dropped a bunch of cash on you too didn’t he? Yes, he did. He might be courting his best buddy if he is regularly spending a lot of money on him. New shoes? No. Expensive dinner? What! No bueno girl. Get on top of this one right away because this one is a tell-tale sign of something not being kosher.
9 He Blows You Off When The BFF Is Around
This is so not okay on so many levels. First of all, you are supposed to be his one and only, so he should not be tossing you aside for anyone. Second, what makes his best friend come above you? Is this guy his one and only that he can’t toss aside—even for you? That’s an interesting question to ask, isn’t it especially if this happens all of the time.
If you come between them, do they seem defensive or uncomfortable? If so, this is something you need to keep you eye on. You should feel welcome in their situations together, not made out to be the third wheel. If you are the odd man out—you might just be that in their relationship. Yeah, that might just be exactly what this is.
8 There Are Way Too Many Touchy-Feely Situations
Okay, not a lot of straight dudes like to be touched for long periods of time by other dudes. There’s the occasional buddy hug, high five, or pat on the shoulder, but that’s about as far as it goes honestly. If they are getting all One Tree Hill all over each other that is a major, major, major red flag because that is not part of the bro code I don’t care how emotional your guy is wired to be.
Do they automatically jump off of each other when you walk in the room too? Stack another red flag on top of that first one because they obviously aren’t comfortable with being caught in the situation they are in. In private they do this together, but not in public. Hmmm. I’m not a detective, but I am detecting something a little fishy here.
7 He’s Dressed To Kill All Of A Sudden
So he’s gone from jeans and a t-shirt to an ensemble that is actually pretty put together, what’s the big deal? Well, if it isn’t in your man’s MO to dress to kill it might be a bit of a problem. Ask yourself, why does he care all of a sudden? Who is he dressing up for? Is he especially dressing up for a certain someone…like his best buddy? Now, we have a problem.
Major changes like this usually mean major changes going on in your man’s life and it should be something that you’re questioning…like ASAP. Maybe he just suddenly started caring about his appearance, but there’s probably a hidden agenda there as well. Put on your detective hat and get to the bottom of what’s going on before things get too out of control.
6 His BFF Doesn't Mind Being Third Wheel On You & Your BF's Dates
It’s cool that your man’s BFF is around the house, but all the time is just way too much. This guy has really worn out his welcome to the point where his mail should just be forwarded to your house (hello, you have your own place, right?). It really gets old when you want to watch a rom-com with the man and the third wheel parks his behind on the couch too (go home much?).
It’s one thing to have the guy over, but when he gets too comfortable it’s time to get your feelers out. How did he get that comfortable to begin with and why does he want to spend THAT MUCH time with your man? It’s not normal and you have to wonder what they are doing when you aren’t around…you just never know.
5 He’s Allegedly Extremely Against The Gay Pride Movement
Does it ever seem odd that he is constantly bashing on the gay community to an overkill extent? It’s almost like he goes out of his way to crack a joke at their expense—especially in front of his buddy. It’s not cool, but in all reality, he is overcompensating. Clearly, he has some unresolved issues that he hasn’t combated openly yet and it’s likely that he has some gay tendencies because his target is a group that hasn’t done anything to him.
If he is indeed bashing them the most to his best buddy and his buddy is reciprocating, it could be because his best bud is going through the same issues—with your man. Yeah, it’s one of those reverse psychology types of things but it makes sense.
4 He Is Offended Whenever You Bash His BFF
Know that you think about it, he seems to go a little over the top whenever you say anything somewhat negative about his best friend, and it seems a little uncalled for. Okay, so you don’t like his taste in music, so what? There’s no need to fly off the handle just because of that. However, he does not see it that way, he’ll defend him to the death, but he doesn’t seem to do that for you. Weird.
Maybe this guy is the true love of his life, and that is why he jumps to his aid whenever he’s in trouble. You would do the same for your man, wouldn’t you? It’s just a shame that he doesn’t jump to your side the same way you would for him.
3 He Sleep Talks And Says His BFF’s Name Between Z’s
SO much no to this one. Why is his best friend on his mind so much that he is saying his name in his sleep? This is extremely odd and brings a new meaning to the word bromance if you know what I mean. What kind of quality time are these two guys spending together when you aren’t around, and how much time is your man spending thinking about him when he isn’t around?
The best thing to do here is to see how often it happens. Once might be one of those things that gets a pass, but if this keeps happening I would maybe bring this up to your man. Ask how much time he is spending with his best friend and what they do when they are spending time together. Take notice if he gets uncomfortable or not and evaluate from there.
2 Your Family Asks Why His BFF Is Always Around
It’s bad enough if your friends are asking why his best buddy is around, but if your family is even questioning why this guy is always around then you really have an issue because how often is mom dropping by? You family only has your best interest in mind and when they are questioning something that seems a little off, you should probably listen as hard as it may be.
There is no reason your man’s best friend needs to be intruding on your home so much that your family should notice, that means he is coming around way too often. It also makes people wonder if they are too close for comfort, which they may as well be. Keep and eye on it and listen to your family on this one.
1 Something Just Isn’t Right When The BFF Is There
You just feel it in your bones, something just isn’t right when his BFF is around and you know it. Call it women’s intuition if you will, but you sense it. You just feel the two of them looking at each other and you can sense the vibes between them, you know that something is off. You don’t have to know the details of what is going on when you aren’t around; you just know something is happening.
You’ve caught them in a couple somewhat sticky situations that they’ve seemed to talk their way out of and you’ve put the pieces together. If you’d confront them they’d have an excuse, but you know the truth deep down. Girl, usually your intuition is right, so don’t discount it just because the story seems far-fetched.