Gofundme. Kickstarter. EquityArcade. There are a few good crowdfunding sites out there going to great causes. Sometimes a house unexpectedly burns down and the platform allows people to gather monies to rebuild their lives. Other times hospital expenses create undue stress on a family’s finances, and these platforms allow the family to get enough money to survive. Then there are those that want to create and build. Kickstarter is a great way to get your start-up or non-profit off the ground, and EquityArcade will help independent game developers raise funds for their video games. Each site is great in its own unique way and can really benefit all parties involved.
Then there are those that aren’t in it for the right reasons. Some people don’t want to get a job and just use these sites for handouts. Others have money but haven’t managed it very well and are hoping others will just donate so they don’t have to stop spending money on day drinking and expensive shoes. Obviously most people steer clear of these, and their $5K goals remain unmet and online as a testament to their baffling greed.
Then, there are those that are truly bizarre. The ones that make you scratch your head and wonder what’s wrong with the OP. We understand wanting to rebuild lives or pay for medical fees for a loved one, but we don’t understand the randomness of some of these. Perhaps the most puzzling aspect? Some of these campaigns were actually funded! Talk about crazy, right? Well, here are the 15 craziest we’ve found.
- We’ve included a bunch of fun Gofundme pages at the end of this article, you won’t believe these exist!
15. Potato Salad: $55,492 (Kickstarter)
“Basically I’m just making potato salad. I haven’t decided what kind yet.”
Ai-yai-yai…where do we even start with this one? Campaign creator Zack “Danger” Brown began this page back in 2014. He had a humble request: $10 to make potato salad. Because we’re dealing with the internet, the campaign soon spread like wildfire. Netizens, perhaps amused by his wish, kept donating and donating until the page raised a whopping $55.5K USD. That’s a lot of potato salad!
So what did those 6,911 backers receive for pledging their cash for mash? Tiers ordered from lowest to highest are as follows: “thank you” posted to the website, a photo of Zack Danger Brown making potato salad, a bite of the potato salad, choosing ingredients for the potato salad, hanging out in the kitchen with him as he made potato salad, receiving a potato-salad themed haiku + having backer’s name carved into one of the potatoes, and hats, tees, and recipe books. Crazy!
14. Midlife Crisis Squirrel Tattoo With Snacks/Tips: $615 (GoFundMe)
“[This tattoo will be] a masterpiece of creativity and BA-ness as a trophy of my own uniqueness, perseverance and a 3 second attention span.”
Carrie from Pennsylvania has it rough. She’s a mother struggling to stay sane as she simultaneously finishes up her Ph.D and runs a photography business. We mean that without sarcasm – that sounds rough. We definitely draw the sympathy line there, however, because Carrie has decided that she needs a tattoo to celebrate her quirky personality but wants us to pay for it. Also tips and snacks while she’s getting the tattoo – specifically pretzels and purple Gatorade.
Nothing wrong with tattoos and we all enjoy snacks, but that’s the sort of thing that should come out of one’s own pocket, not the pockets of strangers. Carrie notes that she would pay for it, but she doesn’t really want to use “family money” for it.
We get it. Maybe that money should go to bills. But also maybe if you can’t afford the tattoo you should just not turn to strangers for an unnecessary handout.
13. I Know Where Your Cat Lives: $3,843 (Kickstarter)
“I Know Where Your Cat Lives” iknowwhereyourcatlives.com is a data experiment that visualizes a sample of 1 million public pics of cats on a world map, locating them by the latitude and longitude coordinates embedded in their metadata.”
So this one is kind of cute, cool, and creepy all rolled into one. The site takes photos from Instagram and posts them on a world map. They get the data from the tagged location information from Instagram. We’re not really sure what the point is, but we quickly located our cat on the map, so that was adorable. Then cool. Then creepy.
On the one hand, we don’t think anyone is gonna stalk us through our cat photos. But on the other hand, this is the internet and it’s totally possible.
The website features cats from all over the world – wonder how many cats live near the Eiffel Tower? You can check that! Want to see a random cat? Randomize to your heart’s content! They even have a newsletter for all your cat-location needs! …yay?
12. Buy One Direction: $1,562 (GoFundMe)
“We would like to buy One Direction from Modest Management so the boys Harry, Liam, Louis, Niall and Zayn have freedom to chose and have possibilities to decide on their own careers. ”
The Sixth Alliance, otherwise known as a sixteen year old girl from Palmdale, California, was saddened by the management of the boys of One Direction. She wanted to ensure that they had the freedom to do as they pleased and go where their hearts would take them. As such, she thought it’d be best if she outright bought them. Not like for a private concert or anything, but literally purchase their contract from Modest Management and…umm…set them free?
Fans around the world complied, albeit in small amounts. Maybe teenage girls don’t have a lot of money, as the $500 million dollar goal fell short by a good $499,998,438.
At least the girl figured she wouldn’t really meet the goal and noted that any money gained would be donated to charities previously funded by the beloved boy band. Guess there are silver linings in not being able to buy your celebrity crushes, right?
11. The Campaign for the Accurate Measurement of Creativity: $12,950 (Kickstarter)
“Can you get credit for creative effort without showing an end product? How is your boss going to know that you spent most of the day working and not just surfing Tumblr? How can you prove to your clients that your rates are justified despite the absence of actual finished work? Can creative output really be measured?”
Asking the real questions, the creators of this interesting invention decided to develop what they dubbed “The Campaign For Accurate Measurement of Creativity”. What ends up essentially being a mason jar pencil sharpener, the aim of this product is to prove to your clients that you have, in fact, been working on sketches despite not having an end product.
The original goal was set at $2,500, but the campaign quickly met and surpassed that five times over. The creators note that all you really need is a lid, as any standard size jar works for this measurement tool. So question – if we’re only buying the lid, can we get a discount?
10. Breakup Ciara and Russell Wilson: Unknown (GoFundMe)
“After seeing how great Future Hendrix career has been since Ciara broke up with him. We think the same thing can happen to Russell Wilson again!!”
In literally one of the pettiest moves possible, some Seahawks fans took it upon themselves to raise money for the Princess, Ciara (throwback, anyone?). Their logic? After Future and Ciara broke up, Future’s career apparently took off. So why shouldn’t the same happen should she decide to dump Russell Wilson?
The creators of the page figured that $50,000 would be enough money to entice Ciara to break up with Russell Wilson and fund her comeback. Unfortunately for them, GoFundMe disagreed with their logic and removed the campaign.
We’re guessing they’re not happy with the fact that Ciara and Russell Wilson are like, super happy being married and expecting a new addition to their family. On top of that, she’s already had a comeback, showing these would-be homewreckers that they have no idea what they’re talking about!
9. Grilled Cheesus: $25,604 (Kickstarter)
“The GRILLED CHEESUS™ is an electronic sandwich press that toasts the face of Jesus onto your sandwich bread! However you slice it, the GRILLED CHEESUS™ lets you bring little grilled miracles to mealtime, snack time, or anytime.”
If you’ve been around on the internet, you’ve surely seen random clickbait articles that feature people who claim they’ve seen Jesus in an inanimate object. One of the most famous Jesus sightings was, in fact, a grilled cheese sandwich. If you squinted your eyes a bit, you could kinda sorta see it.
To eliminate the problem of not really being able to see Jesus in your cheese/bread combo, Rob Corso and Meg Sheehan decided to make a grilled cheese sandwich maker that would imprint their Lord and Savior’s likeness onto your choice of white, whole wheat, or rye. The campaign was initially hoping to raise $25,000 and came out ahead by $604. Which is kind of a miracle, really.
8. Post-Divorce Hedgehog: ≥$265 (GoFundMe)
Erin Calaci, recent divorcee and owner of an extremely google-friendly name, decided that after her ex-husband took the cats that she needed a little friend to keep her company. Perhaps tired of the usual pets, such as dogs or cats, she opted for a hedgehog, because why not.
It would appear that hedgehogs will put a person out $500, so Erin took to GoFundMe in order to offset the cost of adopting a spiny addition to the now family of one.
Hey, no shame in adopting a pet, but why go out of your way to buy an exotic pet you apparently can’t afford? Do you know what they eat? Is there a vet in your area that even knows how to care for these exotic little critters? And do you think hedgehogs will provide you with the emotional fulfillment that a cat or dog does? Like what do you know about hedgehogs other than they’re kinda trendy right now?
At the end of the day, this is not one of those things you ask strangers to front. Sorry, Erin – looks like you got your hedgehog, but now you’re kinda known as “that girl” (and your ridiculously easy-to-google name ensures this won’t die for a long time).
7. Putting A TARDIS Into Orbit: $88,880 (Kickstarter)
“November 23, 2013 is the 50th anniversary of Doctor Who, and we’re extremely excited. So excited, in fact, that we almost don’t know what to do… almost. Actually, we know exactly what to do: We’ve built a replica TARDIS and we’re sending it into orbit. Yes, really!”
When someone’s favorite TV show has a 50th anniversary, it’s certainly cause for celebration; after all, there aren’t that many TV shows that have even lasted that long! Leave it to the nerd-favorite Dr. Who to have some super smart fans to plan something truly extraordinary – a group by the name of 3 Stags pledged to put a real-live TARDIS in space to commemorate the occasion.
Initially they sought to raise $33,000 to accomplish this goal, but ended up raising almost triple that amount at $88,880! Unfortunately for backers, the TARDIS is not in space, but instead in a garage somewhere as the 3 Stags laugh all the way to the bank with the money they DIDN’T use on launching a fictional time-travelling police box. Yikes.
6. Fund The Alabama State Government: $1,365 (GoFundMe)
“The State of Alabama is experiencing tight financial times and needs your help. Rather than have the Government come after your hard earned money you can now send an amount that fits your budget, even request where your money be used.”
We’re used to the government taking our money. But when they take our money and then ask for more? Now that’s where we draw the line.
Senator Paul Sanford of Alabama posted the GoFundMe page back in August of 2015 asking for a whopping sum of $300 million dollars. A number of people have donated here and there and have indeed made their voices heard on where their $5 – $40 dollars should be spent, but most of the page is filled with random commentators bemoaning the government for even thinking about pulling such a stunt, let alone following through with it. Talk about desperate!
5. Emoji Dick: $3,676 (Kickstarter)
“This project will fund the production, via crowd sourcing, of a never-before-released translation of Herman Melville’s classic Moby Dick in Japanese emoji icons.”
So just so we’re all on the same page, “Emoji Dick” is referring to a book and not a thing we call people who are jerks via emojis or a weird way to phrase the eggplant emoji. No no, Emoji Dick is much classier than that – it’s the novel “Moby Dick” by Herman Melville translated into emojis. Because why not?
Fred Benenson wanted to raise $3,500 to achieve this goal and ended up surpassing it by raising $3,676. Not bad for a book that most of the people that funded it probably haven’t even thought about since they were forced to read it in high school.
The book was translated line by line by Amazon Mechanical Turk workers, which, if you weren’t aware, means that they were paid like $0.05 to do each individual task.
4. Will’s Bad Habit: ≥$25 (GoFundMe)
Yowza. This one is all sorts of messed up. Let’s take this step by step, shall we?
First of all, why would anyone think that it’s a good idea to ask for money specifically for drugs online? Like who thinks that that would actually work? The audacity is pretty impressive, but at the same time infuriating.
Second, let’s take a look at the photo. This isn’t your standard photo that seems enticing, as if the person you’re about to give your hard earned money to is thankful for every penny. With a rifle in one hand and rude gesture being made be the other, Will is very much doing the opposite of what one should do when asking for strangers to reach into their hearts and pull out their spare change.
Third…why in the world did four people donate money to this cause?! What possessed them to think it was a good idea to give someone money for the explicit reason to use drugs?! Are they out of their minds?!
3. Crystal Bacon: $2,786 (Kickstarter)
“Crystal Bacon is my sculptural tribute to the most delicious of all meats, bacon. With the help of my wife and daughter, it grew into jewelry and Christmas ornaments. While not true crystal, it is made out of a high quality acrylic plastic that is both durable and beautiful. A true ode to bacon!”
Bacon is amazing, there’s no doubt about it. But sometimes we question the lengths some people take their love of the delicious dish. Case in point, Greg Kiesow, who loves bacon so much that he fashions crystal replicas into ornaments for your…ornamental bacon needs? Yeah, let’s go with that.
He initially hoped to raise $2,500 and was able to go a little further to raise $2,786. The man who loves bacon thiiiiiiiis much states on his kickstarter that the materials to make crystal bacon sure are expensive – hence the kickstarter campaign.
2. Help Me Fight Barron Trump: ??? (GoFundMe)
“I wanna fight this little know it all scumbag of Donald Trump’s kid, help me do that!
Help spread the word!”
No one is saying anything good or bad about Donald Trump here. He’s not going to come into it and we’re not taking any political stances here. So let’s just get that out of the way.
Let’s pretend for a second that we don’t know who the kid is. We just see his face. What do you see? We see the face of a young boy. We don’t know about you, but fighting young boys is really, really, really, REALLY not on our to-do list. Ever.
Now put his name back up there again. Now he’s not just a young boy, but Barron Trump.
Hmm…nope, still doesn’t change our minds. We’re still not going to fight him because WHY WOULD YOU FIGHT A YOUNG BOY?!
1. Combat Kitchenware: $46,261 (Kickstarter)
“I have found a less than epic styling to my current kitchenware. I can crack eggs with a well-placed pistol and beat them with a mighty cordless drill. But frying them? For that I use a non-mighty pan? Never! ”
So began James Brown’s battle cry as he pierced his way through Kickstarter’s armor and raised $46,261 – nearly seven times his original goal of $7,000. All for the love of cooking mightily.
Fans of the HBO series Game of Thrones would get a kick out of this one, and gamers that still play Skyrim would feel this pan fits right in their kitchen. Plus, it doubles as a weapon in the event of a home invader – just think of it as Disney’s Rapunzel’s frying pan V2.0.
Unfortunately, checking James Brown’s website doesn’t seem to reveal any frying pans. Maybe they were a limited run? Fus Ro Dawwwww…shucks.
Sources: kickstarter.com, huffingtonpost.com, gofundme.com, ranker.com
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