Mainstream society can make it impossible to feel confident in your own skin.
Each day, photos of perfectly airbrushed and stick thin photoshopped models are everywhere you look— whether that’s through our Instagram or Facebook feeds, magazines, TV, or print ads slathered on billboards across the city.
However, society’s idea of the perfect body image— as portrayed in photos— isn’t always realistic. In fact, some YouTube videos have even exposed how much editing and altering is done on a photo before it gets published. And let’s not even get started on the wonders that an Instagram filter can do.
But regardless of what mainstream media showcases, everyone has their own unique flaws, charming quirks and insecurities. And while no one is exempt from getting a zit once in a while, or having a bad hair day, outer appearances should never dictate how confident you feel in your own skin. Your ability to feel comfortable in your own body, exactly as you are, is a trait that even the most foolproof Instagram filter can’t compete with.
So, if you struggle with feeling comfortable in your own skin, it’s time to put your insecurities to rest.
15 Appreciate Your Flaws
Sure, it can be hard to accept the parts of yourself that you perceive as flaws. But what you may consider a flaw, someone else probably admires. Besides, flaws are what make you unique, and you weren’t put on earth to blend in with a sea of robots.
Think back to a time you’ve seen someone tear up the dance floor, but they’re a terrible dancer. Yet, they don’t seem to notice or care. And no one else seems to care either, because they’re completely confident being themselves. In fact, more people seem to be drawn to them because they aren’t worried about what other people think.
Letting go of the need to be perfect by appreciating your flaws is not an overnight process. But when you focus on accepting all parts of yourself, you’ll always confident in your own skin— which can’t be shaken, even by the worst of hair days.
14 Don’t Settle for Less
Feeling confident in your own skin requires you to take a stand for what you deserve.
If you don’t see yourself as the most valued person in your life, you’re more likely to make decisions that don’t make you happy, or that cut down your confidence. But the truth is, when you believe you deserve what you desire— and refuse to settle for anything less— your confidence starts to skyrocket.
Refusing to settle for less requires you to understand that you are valuable and worthy. And while this also may not be an overnight process, you can start to adopt these beliefs by making decisions based on what it is that you truly want— not what you think you may or may not deserve.
Not settling for less may require you to make new decisions in a current relationship, friendship or your career. Either way, you can begin to feel more confident in your own skin by refusing to settle for less in your life, starting today.
13 Shift Your Negative Beliefs
Having a lack of confidence may be due to the negative beliefs you currently have about yourself, which simply aren’t true.
Shifting negative beliefs refers to replacing a negative perception you have about yourself with a positive one. Now, this can be easier said than done because personal negative beliefs often stem from childhood or traumatic experiences. Being able to consciously shift negativity that weighs down your confidence may require long-term personal development, perhaps even with the help of a coach or therapist.
But, one way to begin shifting your negative beliefs today without the help of a professional is to begin accepting the situations that have brought on negative feelings as part of your life path. Start to view the negative situations you’ve encountered that have caused you to have negative beliefs about yourself as learning experiences. When you have a neutral outlook on the events you’ve been through in life— good or bad— the negative emotion associated with your experiences begins to fade away, and can no longer weigh down your confidence.
12 Don’t Say Yes When You Mean No
Saying yes when you mean no is a sure way to destroy your confidence
As mentioned above, settling for less than what you deserve can create feelings of unworthiness. Saying yes when you mean no can bring about the same feelings of not feeling good enough, or worthy of what you deserve.
Saying yes when you mean no is also a form of people pleasing. While it’s normal to want to help others, it’s also essential to your confidence that you only say yes when you actually mean yes. By putting up personal boundaries, you are prioritizing your well-being which helps increase your confidence.
You can practice feeling more comfortable in your own skin by checking in with yourself before you give an answer to someone who’s asked you for a favor, or has presented an opportunity. Begin to recognize when you’re about to say yes because you don’t want to let someone else down. Only saying yes when you mean it will help increase your confidence and sense of self worth.
11 Don’t Believe The Negative Things You Tell Yourself
Sure, everyone has days where they place self judgement on all aspects of their being— how they’ve handled a situation, and their accomplishments and failures. As your own greatest critic, it can be hard to tune out the voice that’s constantly berating you with a long, negative dialogue.
But one way to increase your confidence is to understand that your inner critic is lying. When you hear negative thoughts and comments run through your mind, tune them out and replace them with the opposite, positive version. You can begin to change these thoughts by recognizing that you’re simply a human being who’s learning their way through life. Without having wins and losses, it’s impossible to learn and grow.
Replacing self judgement by viewing your experiences as necessary tools for growth is one way to begin creating more confidence in your life, and feeling more comfortable in your own skin.
10 Create a Wellness Routine
Another way to begin feeling more confident in your own skin is to create a routine that prioritizes your personal well-being. This could be a routine you create for yourself first thing in the morning, or when you get home from work, or that you follow throughout the entire day.
This could include going to your favorite yoga class, meditating, listening to your favorite music, drinking a nourishing green smoothie or creating time in your schedule for an extra fifteen minutes to get ready in the morning so that you leave the house feeling your best.
A wellness routine enhances your confidence because you’re putting yourself and your needs first. When you feel like you’re taking proper care of yourself, you’ll automatically have more confidence and feel more comfortable in your own skin.
9 Give Yourself a Compliment Every Morning
When was the last time you looked in the mirror and said something nice to yourself?
To begin feeling more confident in your own skin, it’s important that you start to adopt behaviors that boost your confidence, rather than cut it down. One way to do this is by saying nice things to yourself each day, rather than letting your inner critic take the lead. It can be helpful to leave sticky notes on your mirror with compliments written on them, which will remind you each morning of the amazing qualities you possess.
There is nothing wrong with saying positive things about yourself throughout the day. In fact, imagine if everyone replaced their negative self talk with only positive thoughts? The world would surely be a much more peaceful place, full of people who encourage each other and lift each other up, rather than causing conflict and misery.
8 Spend Your Time With People Who Lift You Up
Often, a lack of self confidence can be ingrained from spending time with people who cut you down, rather than those who lift you up. Toxic relationships and friendships are all too common, and can add fuel to the voice of your inner critic.
Recognizing who you spend time with in your life— and whether they contribute positively or negatively to your self confidence— is necessary to begin improving your confidence and feeling good in your own skin. By carefully evaluating how you feel when you’re in the presence of a certain person, you can begin to make decisions to only keep those around who encourage feelings of positivity and make you feel appreciated, cared for and supported.
Being selective with who you spend your time with, will help your feelings of self worth and confidence increase quickly. This is a rule we should all live by, as life is too short to spend time with those who make you feel less than what you’re worth.
7 Don’t Spend Time in Front of the Mirror
Your inner critic that tears down your confidence loves when you spend time in the mirror, picking apart your flaws.
By not spending more time than necessary in front of the mirror, you’re giving your inner critic less of an opportunity to point out a bad hair day, or that you’re jeans aren’t fitting as loosely as they were the other day. And believe it or not, none of these external factors can dictate your self worth. Outer appearances simply don’t matter when it comes to feeling confident in your own skin. All that matters is that you accept yourself exactly as you are. And when you’re comfortable in your own skin, you begin to radiate a sense of confidence that others find irresistible, too.
So, the next time you’re tempted to spend a few extra minutes in front of the mirror analyzing your appearance, stop yourself and walk away. The less time you spend in front of the mirror, the less of an opportunity your inner critic has to point out a perceived flaw, or imperfection.
6 Practice Having a Positive Mindset
Having a positive mindset is a big part of feeling confident in your own skin. As previously mentioned, if your confidence is low, your inner critic may currently be the dominant voice you listen to. But, make a resolution today to start recognizing when your inner critic is speaking, and when it’s necessary to shut her up.
Thinking positive thoughts about all situations in life also helps increase your self confidence. Besides, when you have a positive outlook on life, more people are drawn to your positive energy and want to spend time with you. And although feeling comfortable in your own skin is an inside job, feeling appreciated by others also helps boost your self confidence.
Having a positive outlook on life is without a doubt, an attractive quality that everyone admires. So, when you’re beginning to think negative thoughts, do your best to catch them and turn them around to their opposite. Even if you don’t believe the positive version of the negative thoughts at first, it’s a good exercise to practice that will automatically train your brain to think positively in any situation.
Feeling confident in your own skin goes beyond your physical appearance. But, your self confidence is also tied to how well you take care of your body. This doesn’t mean that you should exercise to become a stick-thin version of the Calvin Klein model you saw the other day. Instead, exercising helps release endorphins (the “feel good” neurotransmitters) that encourage you to think positively.
Now, of course, exercising also helps tone your body which improves your physical appearance. But improving your physical appearance is something you should only do for yourself and to feel comfortable in your own skin- not to keep up appearances with others. Exercising regularly is a great way to prioritize your personal health and wellbeing, which automatically increases your self confidence. By taking care of yourself, you’ll begin to develop a stronger sense of self worth and recognize the importance of putting your needs first as part of a healthy lifestyle.
4 Eat Foods That Fuel Your Body
Eating foods that promote your health and wellness is another way to increase your self confidence. When you’re constantly eating foods that contain few nutrients, you’ll notice your energy levels start to decrease, your skin may lose it’s shine and become dull and you’ll feel sluggish as you move through your day.
Since eating foods with fewer nutrients does little to provide you with energy, you’ll also be less likely to attract positive situations into your life when you’re always feeling “blah” and tired.
As you can see, eating foods that are nutritious, such as fruits, vegetables, nuts and seeds, can have the opposite effect on your body. In addition to providing you with energy, foods rich in nutrients can also help your skin glow, your hair shine and help you maintain or work towards your ideal physique. All of these factors can help you feel more confident.
3 Spend Time Alone
A big part of feeling confident and comfortable in your own skin is learning to enjoy your own company.
Having a social life is important, but making the point of spending time alone can also help you get to know yourself better. And the more you learn about yourself, the easier it is to develop a stronger sense of confidence and self-love. Spending time alone can also help you discover what it is you want in life, and how to achieve it. You may also begin to recognize where you need to create boundaries with others, and necessary changes you need to make in your lifestyle and relationships to help improve your confidence.
Creating a specific time to spend alone to get to know yourself better, even for an hour each week, can do wonders for developing a healthy relationship with yourself and feeling more comfortable in your own skin.
2 Laugh As Much As Possible
Laughing is an essential part of life, and many people even claim that laughter is a key component for any healing journey - especially when recovering from years of low self confidence.
Laughing on purpose sounds almost too simple, but it can make a profound difference in how you feel on a day to day basis. Think about it: when you don’t feel happy, you don’t necessarily feel that great in your own body. You may look towards other forms of distraction, which can be toxic behaviors that eliminate self-confidence, as an escape from your current state.
Since laughter is one of the quickest ways to turn a negative feeling state into a positive one, it’s a great tool for becoming more confident in your own skin. Learning to take a light-hearted approach to life’s situations by laughing— even when things go wrong— will also help you become more confident in dealing with life’s challenges. And when you trust in yourself and your ability to laugh and “go with the flow” when things go wrong in life, you’ll develop a sense of unshakeable confidence.
1 Know That You Are Beautiful
Regardless of how you feel about yourself today, it’s important to know that you are beautiful. In fact, it’s been said that other people see you as 20% more attractive than you see yourself, because you pay more attention to your perceived flaws each day.
But outer appearances aside, your true beauty resides within you. The more positive your thoughts are, the more ease you approach life’s challenges with, and your ability to prioritize your own well-being and personal needs, all contribute to your inner beauty and sense of self worth. These qualities radiate from within you, and show up as unwavering confidence on the outside. So the next time you aren’t feeling as comfortable in your own skin as you’d like, take a moment to look within yourself and recognize all of the amazing qualities you possess- as your own beauty must first be recognized by you.