Learning to kiss is something that takes time and practice. For first-time kissers, this can be a complicated thing if you are unsure of what you are doing. There is nothing to be afraid of when it comes to getting those lips moving, as you will figure it all out with your lucky guy! There are, however, some things you should be aware of beforehand so you can avoid doing them and making your kissing experience better, not worse!
You don’t want to be the person who is a bad kisser for a particular reason. Some bad kissers include those who use their tongue way too much, others are ones who are extremely aggressive. Although you don’t know what your kissing style may be quite yet, there are some things that you should avoid doing so you won’t be labeled as the bad kisser. Don’t let the thought of being a bad kisser stress you out too much! As long as you stay away from these 15 things, you will be as right as rain and there will be no reason to worry.
Don’t be afraid to let your lips learn the skill of kissing with your man and be sure to enjoy the moment! Kissing is a wonderful way to show your love, and don’t let the nerves of being bad at it destroy the chance to display your affection for your partner. Reduce your stress by knowing what NOT to do and have fun! Check out these 15 things you should never do when kissing!
15 Go In Tongue First
One of the leading causes of bad kissing experiences is when one kissing participant leans into that first kiss with their tongue sticking out. First of all, this can be extremely intimidating and disgusting when your partner is coming at you, eyes closed and tongue out. Most people, when having a first kiss, prefer just lips. Tongue is usually something that individuals add later to their kissing. It is better to save it for when you have become comfortable with the task and being with that other person. Always lead with your lips because that is what kissing starts with and what most people are expecting! If you lead with your tongue, there is no knowing what kind of terror the other person is experiencing. Don’t be a dirty kisser; keep your tongue in your mouth when going in for the kiss! Save your physical relationship with your man and never lead with your tongue when kissing.
Most commonly when we witness people kissing either in public or on films, their eyes are shut. Every now and then, they may open their eyes to look at their loved one or look around them. But for the majority of people, keeping your eyes closed when kissing is preferred. Something that you should never do when kissing is to stare at them the whole time it is happening. It might be tempting to see what their reaction is and see their face, but to keep your eyes open the whole time can freak your partner out. If suddenly they opened their eyes slowly and noticed you staring with big eyes right at them, they will most likely be turned off. If you get to a point in a relationship where perhaps keeping your eyes open is okay depending on a situation, then go for it! For first kisses though, it is best to keep your eyes shut to have a good kissing experience.
13 Don't Say The Wrong Name
If you have had more than one boyfriend and perhaps recently broke up with someone that you didn’t want to leave, be careful! There is nothing more awful than kissing someone and suddenly saying the wrong name. Not only will your kissing session be over, but there could be some bumpy obstacles that occur for your relationship as well. Keep your mind in the moment and on the person you are with, don’t let your mind wander to other people that you have been with. This will help you focus on the here-and-now and will assist saying the correct name. If you are so focused on another person, it might be a good idea to avoid kissing for the moment until you have figured out how you feel. Don’t let internal conflicts ruin your kissing experience. Be sure to avoid saying the wrong name -- something you should never do when kissing.
12 Too Much Saliva
Another type of bad kissing experiences is usually a result of a person having too much saliva in their mouth when kissing. Don’t be that sloppy person! Be sure that when you go in for a kiss, that you take time to swallow and clear your mouth. Although you may feel weird, there is nothing wrong with swallowing back your saliva in the middle of a make-out session! Better that than having your drool in his mouth. If you have too much saliva in your mouth, it will be a guaranteed way to turn off your man and gross him out. When kissing, most people don’t think about the small exchange of saliva that occurs, but if you let your mouth get too wet it will be the first thing on his mind. Save yourself the embarrassment and awkwardness and never have too much saliva in your mouth when kissing.
11 Thinking Too Much
Sure, kissing may not be an intuitive skill, but don’t let the stress of kissing or the intimidation of the action freak you out. Some people will begin to think of their kissing experience to come and start to worry that they will do the wrong thing. The problem is that we often get ourselves too worked up that we start striving for absolute perfection. Take a breath because no matter what you do to prepare, it probably won’t be perfect. It especially won’t be perfect if you are overthinking things. Calm your brain and let the kissing happen. You will learn quickly enough with the help of your partner. If you are too busy thinking about the angle of your head and what your lips should be doing at the moment, you are not going to be present in the moment and your partner will feel that. Relax, don’t think so much, and you will figure it out as you go along!
10 Too Aggressive
Sometimes kissing can be fun to add a little bit of aggression. Whether that is gently biting, pulling hair a bit, or squeezing them a little tighter. One thing you should never do when kissing is be too aggressive. As fun as it may be to be tough on them and feel playful, it is important to be aware of how hard you are biting or how rough you are being to them. They are still human and pain is real! Don’t get too caught in the moment of playful aggression and end up hurting your partner. Be gentle with them and remember that you are still trying to show affection and not actually beat them up! It is a good thing to be aware of how your partner is reacting to your actions, because if they are backing away and have a worried or pained look on their face, they probably are not enjoying it. Playing it rough can be fun, but no one likes to be head-butted. Never be too aggressive when kissing!
9 Lick His Teeth
The French kiss is a wonderful thing for some people, and for others it isn’t. But if you are going to attempt using your tongue a bit, be sure that you are doing it right! One thing you should never do when kissing is using your tongue to lick his teeth. There is nothing enjoyable to anyone by having someone licking your teeth. All that goes through you brain is germs, the last thing you ate that might still be stuck in there, and total discomfort. Don’t gross your partner by giving his pearly whites a wash with your tongue; let them do that themselves! Keep your tongue close to his and don’t swirl it around like a toilet. If you are set on trying to use tongue, just use a little at first and see how it goes. The thing to keep in mind always when using tongue though is to not lick his teeth!
8 Wait For Him To Lean In All The Way
Ever seen the film Hitch? We can all learn a few lessons from that film, but one of the biggest things is to be aware of how much to lean in when kissing. Never awkwardly wait for your partner to lean in all the way as it will cause him to reconsider whether he wants to kiss you. Perhaps you read the moment wrong and are standing there like an idiot with your eyes closed and your lips puckered. Waiting for him to do all the work can also leave a guy feeling like he owes you something and you are expectantly waiting for him to give you what you need. Let a kiss be mutually wanted and lean in a bit as well. Help him read the moment and lean in so that you can both be aware that a kiss is on its way! It makes for a more perfect moment.
7 Pass Your Gum
Ever seen those moments on TV when a boy walks away from kissing a girl and suddenly finds gum in his mouth and excitedly shows his friends? One thing you should never do when kissing is to pass your gum to your partner! No matter what the shows tell you, there is nothing sexy about a chewed piece of rubber that has been in every space of your teeth being passed on into your partner’s mouth. If you think about it, that’s what it really is – sharing pre-chewed food and germs with another. It can be especially terrible if your partner has no clue what you are about to do and you pass your gum to him. It will probably leave him disgusted and avoiding your kisses for some time to come. Save yourself some trouble and throw your gum out or put it in the back of your mouth when kissing. Don’t go sharing.
6 Don't Start Thinking About Other Things
Have you ever had that moment when you are doing something and focusing on a task and suddenly you start remembering other things? For example, perhaps you suddenly remembered that you forgot to change out the laundry, or you remembered that funny joke your friend told you yesterday. It is fine to have random thoughts when you are doing menial tasks or in places where you can write it down. On the other hand, when kissing, it is a good idea to never start thinking about other things. Not only will it take your focus out of the moment, but also it will be apparent in your body language and in the amount of involvement in the kiss. Your partner will probably feel your shifting thoughts and will begin to think that you are getting bored. Keep your mind on the task at hand and let your thoughts fade away for now. Enjoy your man and the moments you are with him – keep your mind focused on the kiss!
One of the most embarrassing things you can do when kissing is to accidentally let out a burp in their mouth. There will be nothing more traumatizing for both you and your partner when this occurs. To avoid this, ensure that if you are on a date that you stay away from carbonated drinks, especially if you know kissing is on the table later! In some cases you will be able to swallow back your burp when kissing. It is important to continue to be aware of your body when kissing and avoid embarrassing yourself. If it cannot be helped and you know the burp is going to come up, do yourself and your partner a favor and break the kiss and turn away. Do not burp into their mouth. Sure it might still be a bit embarrassing that you burped, but it will be less terrible then letting your belch go straight into their open and embracing mouth! Never burp when kissing!
4 Leave Him Gasping For Air (Literally)
Kissing sessions can sometimes get intense and you both will find that you are gasping for air. The heat of the moment has taken away your breath and left your heart racing! This is all fine, but be sure to never leave your partner gasping for air because you have not given them the chance to breath! This usually occurs when you are kissing so hard that you have your face pressed so close to his that he has no chance to take in a breath. Let your man breathe! It is one thing to leave him gasping for air because you are taking his breath away, but it is not good when he literally cannot breath. Be sure to give your faces some space so you can either suck in a breath through your mouth or continue to breathe normally through your nose. You sure wouldn’t want your partner passing out on you mid-kiss!
3 Let Your Tongue Do All The Action
One of the biggest mistakes that new kissers do is let their tongues go crazy when kissing their partners. You should never let your tongue do all the action when kissing. French kissing is fine and dandy when your partner is on the same page, but if kiss after kiss, you are continuing to over-use your tongue, your partner will probably begin to feel uncomfortable. The tongue is great to use when making-out and getting things passionate, but even then, the tongue should be used sparingly. We are still human, and slimy wet things will gross us out. Let your lips, hands, and body take over sometimes and give the tongue a break. Kissing can involve more than mouths and it is important to not forget that. Let your fingers run through his hair, let your body press up closely to his, but never let your tongue do all the action!
2 Don’t Make Awkward Jokes
Talking about kissing is always fun. Saying things like “I can’t wait to kiss you” or “you always know how to take my breath away” can be romantic and sweet. They inform the person you are with that you enjoy kissing him. That being said, you should never make extremely awkward jokes when kissing. There is nothing worse to ruin the moment with your man than saying something weird. This could involve discussing in detail what he was doing with his lips, or saying, in the middle of a kiss, something such as “your lips are wet and yummy, kind of like the soup my mom makes for me.” Don’t ruin your relationship by saying strange things and weirding out your partner. Stick to the cute and romantic things, and if you accidentally say something that sounds awkward, make a joke about it! Save face and recover from it! It is definitely a good thing to keep in mind that awkward jokes are not something to do when kissing.
1 Push Him And Pressure Him
It is important for you to be comfortable when it comes to kissing, but it is also very important to ensure your partner is comfortable too! You may be the experienced one in the relationship and want to move forward, but he might not be at that point yet. If you hear your partner saying no, or pulling away from you, it is important to respect that! The worst thing you can do to make your partner feel uncomfortable and unloved is by pressuring him and pushing him into doing things he doesn't want. Everyone is different in what they like and what they don’t like. Give your partner some time and if you need to, talk with him about it. Perhaps you need to change your technique or just need to convince him that he is just as good as you. When kissing, never push your partner or pressure him!