It's the first date with a guy you've had a crush on for a little while now. You're excited, but you're also a bit nervous. Why? Because it seems like every time you like someone and go on a date with him, that's pretty much the extent of the relationship. Recently, you've found yourself wondering why you never get asked out on a second date or even hear from the guy ever again. And while that doesn't usually bother you, you actually like this guy so you want everything to go perfectly. Well, don't worry, we're here to help you out. Dating can be weird. Of course, every situation is unique. However, there are definitely things and topics you should avoid on the first date, especially if you want to be asked out by him again. Read below to find out 15 things you should never do on the first date.
15 Talk About Your Ex
One of the worst things you can do on the first date is talking about one of your ex-boyfriends, especially if you've just gotten out of a relationship with him. Why? Because it's a red flag. If you're talking about your ex with a guy you hardly know, chances are, he's going to think you're still madly in love with your him. Sure, it's all right to mention him, but do your best to focus on the present, not the past. Guys want to date girls they feel are ready for a new relationship, not girls that are using them to get over an old one.
14 Try Too Hard
We get it: You want to look great for your first date. You want your outfit to be perfect and you want to come off as someone who has it all together. However he already asked you out, so it's obvious he's interested. Don't put on a show for him. Be yourself. Guys are smarter than we give them credit for and they can see right through any 'act' we might put on for them. If you're nervous, let him know. He'd rather be with someone who's honest than with someone who pretends they're too cool for school.
If your meal comes and it's not the way you like it, it's all right to send it back. That being said, though, you shouldn't throw a fit about it. If you don't like the restaurant he took you to, keep it to yourself until you get to know him better. If you come off as high maintenance from the start, it's going to freak him out. After all, if you seem like a piece of work from the beginning, how are you going to be three months from now? Most guys like girls that are down to earth so it's important he knows that you are from the very beginning.
12 Talk Badly About Other People
All right. First of all, it's never a good idea to talk badly about other people. However, on the first date, it's a huge no-no. When you talk badly about other people, the only person that really looks bad is yourself. Not only does it make you seem mean, but it also makes you seem extremely insecure. On top of that, because he doesn't know you or trusts you, he's going to wonder what you'd say about him behind his back. Therefore, he might not open up to you the way he might if he feels like you're trustworthy.
11 Dominate The Conversation
If you're a nervous talker, be weary of how much you talk while you're on the date with him. It's easy to dominate the conversation. Why? Because you want him to know you. However, you should also let him know that you want to get to know him too by listening to him when he talks. Make sure there is equal give and take in the conversation. If he's quiet, ask him questions to try and open him up. If he tells a story, stay engaged. What he has to say is just as important as what you have to say.
Why is it that whenever we're trying to impress people, we tell little white lies? Oh right, because we're insecure. For example, you may lie about how much money you make or about different accomplishments you have. News flash: He can see right through you. Don't try to impress him. Being confident in who you are and proud of what you do is an immediate turn on and way more impressive than any white lies you may tell. Additionally, if you lie from the start, you're going to have more problems down the line should you guys continue to see each other.
9 Talk About Family Problems
We all have baggage. And while you want to be honest with him from the start, it's important that you're not too honest too soon. Avoid talking or complaining about issues you have with your family. If you're someone who talks about your dad at every opportunity they get, you should wait to do that until you know him a little bit better. Why? Because that screams "daddy issues." Of course, you can talk about your family with him, but you don't have to go into every detail of your childhood on the first date. Save that for a later time.
8 Show Up Late
You may think making him wait is a good thing because you don't want to come off as easy or desperate- but you're wrong. When you show up late for the first date, the only thing you're letting him know is that you think your time is way more important than anyone else's. Additionally, it's immature. You're an adult, you don't need to play mind games. If you're accidentally a little bit late, apologize. If the situation was reversed, chances are, you'd be annoyed if he was late. No one wants to be in a relationship with someone that comes off as flakey.
7 Get Jealous
He's a single guy and you're a single girl. What does that mean? It means neither of you is tied to anyone but yourselves. If you catch him staring at another woman or even flirting with the waitress, let it go. Don't get jealous of whoever grabs his attention. Sure, it's rude and he should only be focusing on you- but you don't own him. At this point, he doesn't owe you anything. Take everything he does with a grain of salt, but remember how he acted when or if he asks you on another date.
6 Spend The Night
We've been told this our entire lives and it still remains true. If you want a guy to take you seriously, you shouldn't sleep with him on the first date. First of all, it's important to get to know someone before going to bed with them. If you sleep with him so easily, chances are, he's going to think you'd sleep with other people just as easily. He wants to feel special too. Now, we're not saying you should play 'hard to get,' we're simply suggesting you make him work for your affection. Guys want what they can't have, therefore, if you give yourself to him right away, he might lose interest.
5 Be On Your Phone
You said yes to the date because you wanted to spend time with him. Therefore, it's important that you show him that. If your friends are texting your or if you get a call from work, do your best to ignore them until your date is over. Texting in the middle of dinner is not only rude, but it's awkward. You never want him to think that what's going on in the outside world is more entertaining than him. Remember, he's probably just as anxious or uncomfortable as you are.
4 Ask Too Many Personal Questions
You want to get to know him because you like him- which is great! However, you should let him show you himself instead of practically interrogating him. If you ask him a million questions, he's going to think he's being interviewed and chances are, he'll start to feel on edge. If you can tell a certain topic is bothering him, change it. Most likely, he's someone that needs time to open up to other people. Don't force him into admitting things he doesn't want to admit or divulging information he wants to keep private. He'll tell you everything you want to know when's he's ready.
3 Seek Compliments
So, you're on edge because you don't know him and he doesn't know you. All you want is for him to tell you that you're a great girl and he'd love to see you again. However, don't force him into saying it. Stand your ground. Remember, you have just as much say in the next date as he does. Don't come off as someone who needs to be complimented or adored to feel like your presence is wanted. Why? Because it makes you seem desperate. You're just as lovely as he is and you should know that without him telling you.
2 Not Eat
We're human, we all love food. Sure some of us can enjoy a good salad every now and then, but don't be that girl who doesn't eat. Many women still believe that there are things that shouldn't be done in front of a man before you get to know each other, sure that's true, keep the mystery and all that. But, we doubt that the guy sitting across from you thinks that women can't enjoy a big steak every now and then. So order whatever it is you want on the menu, don't be afraid, but maybe hold off on any garlic or onions. Afterall, you don't want to completely scare him off!
1 Talk About The Future
Look, you just met the guy. Sure love at first sight and all that can happen, but you haven't really gotten to know each other yet, so you can't possibly know if there is any future between the both of you. Many men fear the whole idea of a real future with someone, so if you start bringing up how badly you want to get married, and how many kids you want you might scare him off before you even get the chance to really know him. You don't want your date to think that you're basically shopping around for your next one true love. First dates are supposed to be fun, relax, enjoy the moment (and free food), and go with the flow.