Most of us have been through the infuriating experience of dating a guy for a while, thinking that things are going well, and then the guy slowly disappearing out of our life. They take longer to text back and their replies are shorter, too. When we ask them to hang out, they are always busy... and suddenly we realize that we haven’t spoken to them for weeks. If this just happens once or twice, it probably isn't a problem. But if you find that this is happening over and over again, you might wonder what the problem is. Sadly, it is possible that you are the problem without even realizing. It doesn’t mean that you are unattractive or unappealing, it just means that you are doing something that makes men lose interest. Every dating situation is different, but there are some common issues that will result in a lack of interest from men. Here are 15 things that women do that make men lose interest.
15 Talking Too Much
No matter how smart and interesting you are, if you completely dominate all of the conversations with your crush, he will become bored and fast. No one likes hanging out with someone who loves the sound of their own voice... especially when they don’t give other people the chance to speak! You might think that you are being friendly and chatty, but isn’t coming across that way. If you regularly interrupt your crush or realize that he hasn’t said a word out loud for over five minutes, it is likely that you are talking too much and not giving him a chance to speak. Even if you are being interesting and funny, you are shutting him down whenever he tries to communicate with you – so it is nearly impossible for him to bond with you. If you can relate to this, slow down and take the time to ask your date some questions (and really listen to their answers).
14 Being Boring
Different people have different interests, so you can’t click with everyone. If you find that during dates you have very little to say to your crush, or you don’t know how to respond to the things he's saying, it's definitely possible that he finds you slightly boring. No one likes going on a boring date or spending time with a person that they find boring. It is also hard to make a connection with someone that you don’t click with. If someone is actively dating, they are looking for an amazing person who they instantly click with... not someone who is simply there to fill the time. Of course, there is no easy way to be less boring, but it could be that you are dating the wrong type of person. If you love video games and horror films, but your date hates them, you may both find each other boring. Try to date people who you have things in common with. That way, you will find someone who hangs on to your every word.
13 Acting Like A Victim
Most people have been through a bad relationship at some point in their life. Maybe you had a jealous and controlling ex or got cheated on. When the relationship ends, you feel liberated and free, and you promise yourself that you won’t put up with that behaviour again. However, this can cause problems later on, especially if you still carry your past with you. You might try to make a point to your date that you won’t be a pushover who accepts bad behaviour, but this is a huge turn-off for most men. The guy you are dating now and your ex are not the same person, and you shouldn’t compare the two. Your date may feel offended by the comparison, and he will think that you are carrying a lot of emotional baggage. If you can relate to this, stop dating until you have moved on from your past relationships.
12 Refusing To Say Sorry
You did something to upset him, and you haven’t owned up to it or even said that you were sorry. Lots of people struggle to apologize because of their pride, but this can end friendships and relationships. Maybe you insulted his outfit in a light-hearted way, and when you realized he was offended you tried to make a joke out of it. You were not being mean intentionally, but no one likes being offended and then mocked. It's pretty likely that he's going to see you in a different light after this. Maybe he thought that you were sweet and kind, and now he thinks that you are mean and self-obsessed. If you think that you have offended your date, swallow your pride and offer them a genuine apology. Their feelings are just as valid as yours, and it is unlikely that they will continue to make time for you if you don’t think that you should say sorry.
11 Being Insecure
No one on this earth likes spending time with someone who is insecure and jealous, especially if you let these qualities become super obvious at the beginning of a relationship. Especially when your date hasn’t yet done anything to make you feel insecure or jealous. It can be super exhausting to date someone who constantly has bouts of insecurity. No man wants to spend every day reassuring and comforting someone, especially when they already think that you are great! Remember that it isn’t your date’s job to make you feel better whenever you feel low. It's your job to work on your own problems. If you are insecure and jealous, it is likely that you have low self-esteem. You might regularly find yourself comparing yourself to other women, and worrying that you are not good enough. If you feel this way, you shouldn’t be dating. Take some time to yourself to work on developing your confidence, so that you can be healthy and mature in your next relationship.
10 Being Too Interested In Him
You really, really like your date. You think that he is charming, witty, intelligent, funny and seriously gorgeous. You’re not sure how you managed to land such a catch. But before you know it, he has lost interest in you. For some people, the best part of dating is slowly getting to know a new person. They enjoy the chase and the catch; but without the chase, they aren’t that interested in the catch. If you are constantly all over your date, and you try to spend every day with him, he might start to feel uncomfortable around you. You might want to make it official, but he is happy just dating... and what's more, he can definitely tell that you want more. This will make him lose interest as he knows that he can’t give you what you want. In reality, he is being kind because he knows that he doesn’t like you as much as you like him, and he doesn’t want to string you along.
9 Being Indecisive And Unreliable
Some people are slightly indecisive and unreliable, and it can be endearing... in a slightly annoying way. However, if you are very indecisive, unreliable and erratic, you might find that men often lose interest in you. Some people are proud of being indecisive and unreliable because they think it is an interesting quirk. However, most people find these traits tiresome and selfish. If you agree to meet your date at a restaurant at seven, and you turn up drunk at eight, you are not being funny and cute. Nope. You are being rude and selfish, and you are not considering your date’s feelings. No one wants to date someone who never considers their feelings. If you often cancel on dates, or suddenly decide to leave early, your date will assume that you are not interested, even if you are. They will start to distance themselves, so they can find a date who is reliable, decisive and mature.
8 Trying To Change Him
When you first start dating someone new, you only see the good in them. However, eventually those rose-tinted glasses fall off, and you realize that your date isn’t perfect; he has both good traits and bad traits. You might find yourself trying to change him, but this is an easy way to make him lose interest in you. No man wants to date a woman who doesn’t actually like them for who they are, which is pretty reasonable. If you keep trying to change your date, he might start to feel worthless and unwanted. If you can relate to this, ask yourself, "Why am I trying to change him? Do I actually like him for who he is? Can I accept his flaw, as well as his good traits?" Instead of focusing on all of your date’s bad qualities and parts, focus on the good. You might find that you start seeing him in a new light.
7 Being Too Easy
Society is improving, and women are more able to express themselves. If they want to have a one-night-stand, which is their choice and no one else's and no one should judge them for their decision. However, when it comes to dating, lots of people love the chase. You might see your date as a possible boyfriend, but he might see you as a one-night-stand. And if you sleep together right away, he might not be interested in more as he already got what he wanted. That isn’t to say that there is anything wrong with sleeping with someone on the first date because hey, lots of long-term relationships start this way! However, some people sleep with someone when they are emotionally attached, without realizing that their date isn’t looking for a relationship. Remember that sleeping with someone doesn’t mean that you have an emotional connection with them. If you really, really like someone, and you want more than a one-night-stand, wait until you know he wants the same thing before you sleep together.
6 Not Being Compatible In The Bedroom
You hung out with your crush a few times, and it seemed like things were going really well. You made each other laugh, and then you finally got intimate... and you haven’t heard from him since. You might think “Typical, he was only interested in me for one thing”, but you could be wrong. You might have thought that it was amazing, but he might have found it awkward. If you are not compatible with your crush, he will quickly lose interest. After all, it is an important aspect of a relationship, especially at the beginning. If this happens to you, don’t take it to heart. It doesn’t mean that you are unattractive, or bad in bed. It just means that you and your date don’t have a physical connection. Move on and hold your head high. Chances are you will have a better connection with the next guy you date!
5 Being Too Uptight
Some people are more uptight than others, which is totally normal. Some people like to laugh at themselves and tell insulting jokes, whereas other people find that kind of humor childish and immature. If your date often tells childish jokes that you don’t find funny, he may start to lose interest. Most people want to date someone who makes them laugh; someone who they have a deep connection with. If your date tells a joke and you sit there with a stony, unsmiling face, he will start to think that you two don’t get along. This will make him lose interest in you, which is fair enough because who wants to date someone who doesn’t get your sense of humor? It can also be seriously awkward to hang around with someone who treats you like a child! If you can’t take a joke, that is fine; but you should find someone to date who feels the same way.
4 Being Clingy
You fell hard for your crush on the first date, and you know that you want a long-term relationship with him. You can't wait to see him again and you just want to be around him all the time. You love hugging him and touching him, too. For some men, this is a huge turn-off, and that's especially true if their feelings aren’t as strong as yours. Some people also dislike public displays of affection. You might think that holding his hand constantly is cute, but he might find it suffocating. If you are constantly all over your date, and you regularly talk about serious things (such as a long-term relationship, buying a house, getting married, having children) you might freak him out. It can be very uncomfortable to date someone who is that intense, especially if you know that you and your date aren’t on the same page. Remember that you don’t need a boyfriend to define you; you are already awesome.
3 Being Controlling
Some people are naturally controlling, whereas others are more laid back and relaxed. When two opposite people date, it can be a total disaster because the more controlling person can take advantage of the other person's easy going nature. No one wants to date someone who wants to control all aspects of their life. If you tell your date how to look and when he can see his friends, he will quickly lose interest in you. He wants to be in control of his own life. He doesn’t need a new person to walk in and try to become the boss of his life. If you can relate to this, imagine if the attitudes were swapped. Would you want to date a guy who told you how to dress, and how to style your hair, and when to see your friends? No, you wouldn’t. You would find his behavior controlling and slightly abusive. Remember that.
2 Being Too Needy
When you are dating someone, it is nice to be needed, but it isn’t nice to have a partner who is dependent on you. If you constantly text and call your date, and you make him feel like you can’t function without him, he will start to feel trapped. You are not a child. Remember that. You are an adult who is capable and responsible. You shouldn’t need your date to feel worthwhile, as you should be able to make yourself feel worthwhile. If you think that you are too needy in relationships, take a break from dating so that you can focus on yourself. Spend some quality time with yourself; read a book, or enjoy a bubble bath. Learn to enjoy your own company and fall in love with yourself. Spend time with your friends and family, and focus on your passions and hobbies. When you have a healthy relationship with yourself, get back in the dating scene... but not because you feel like you need a date.
1 Being Too Serious
Different people look for different things in a relationship. Some people want to find a reliable, dependable provider who can protect them in life. Other people want to find someone who will make them laugh all day. Others want someone spontaneous and free-spirited who will make their life more exciting. For this reason, lots of relationships don’t work out. If two people want completely different things, they will struggle to form a happy relationship together. Often, men lose interest because their date is too serious; they are looking for a long-term provider, while the man is just looking for a simple connection. If you find that men often lose interest in you because you are too serious, try to live in the moment. Enjoy the moments you spend with your date instead of thinking about the future and how to make the relationship work. Focus on the little things instead and you just might be super lucky in love.