www.thetalko.com

15 Things Guys Are Still Doing Wrong On Apps

The concept of going online or downloading apps to look for love have been around for a while now, and they're pretty popular. Make that insanely popular. A lot of us have had plenty of practice using them (maybe more practice than we would like). And yet, while you painstakingly write your profile and take the best photos and make sure that you're presenting yourself in the best way possible, it turns out that not everyone feels that way. Lots of guys are still main some pretty major mistakes... even though we've all been using these apps for long enough that these things really shouldn't be happening anymore. Here are 15 things that guys do on apps that they really shouldn't. Seriously guys, it's not that difficult not to do these things, and they are pretty easy fixes. Do yourself a favor and all the girls that you're chatting with and don't do these things. We promise it will work out for you if you can just stop.

15 Having No Bio

Um, what now? You can't write a single word in your bio? What is that supposed to say about you? I know that some people don't like to write about themselves. Well, in fact, most people don't like to write about themselves. But in that case, you can at least just list out some things you like or descriptive words or something like that. I'll take "Pizza, hiking, dogs" over a blank bio any day because at least I know that you're an actual human. And that you like pizza, hiking and dogs, and those are some pretty great things. Even better if you can add something that gives the slightest vantage point into the type of personality you have or the style of life that you live. If you can't write a single word in a bio, I'm going to question whether you're capable of having any kind of a conversation with you and unless you're clearly extremely hot, I just won't be interested to wait long enough to find out.

14 Posting Photos With Celebs

This probably happens in Los Angeles more than in other places, although I'm sure there's a bit of it everywhere. I find it really weird when guys post photos with celebrities. There are a few reasons that this really bugs me. For one thing, if you're actually friends with these people (or it's your job to be friends or at least friendly with them), by bragging about this you're basically saying that you're looking for a girl that's after the celebs, not you. Maybe this helps with getting laid, I don't know, but it seems a little desperate that you don't think you alone is good enough. Do you really want a girl to swipe on you just because you once met Justin Bieber at a nightclub? She probably already dated Justin Bieber anyway. If it's your job you're trying to show off that's weird too, because there are more interesting ways to discuss what you do for a living.

13 Using Cheesy Photos

What we each considered to be cheesy will undoubtedly be totally different, but there are a few things that probably fall under the umbrella for a lot of people. Things like mirror selfies that show off weird poses to showcase flexed abs, selfies where you are making weird faces, and some of those Halloween costumes as well. The thing about Halloween costumes is that I either can't see what you look like or you are dressed as a woman which I also do not need to see. I get that the point of the Halloween photo is that you are having fun with your friends but literally everyone celebrates Halloween so you're not showing me anything about your life or interests. Or your face. Don't use any of these pictures as your main profile photo, because that's just super weird and borderline creepy, and why would you do this to yourself?

12 Not Asking Questions

When guys get to the stage where there is some dialogue going on, they should remember that it's a two-way street and not assume that the girl is going to be leading the conversation, even if she starts it. There is nothing worse than like you hit a dead end with someone because they answered a question but then didn't respond with a question or leave it open for a follow up. Oddly, I've had this experience with a person who I ended up meeting and they were extremely conversational in person and over text, so it was sort of a mystery what was happening at first. Of course, it shifted enough to the point that we switched to text and then met, but it would be a lot easier if interested people just made sure to hold up their end of the convo. You're on these apps for a reason, right? So why not make an effort?

11 Using Blurry Photos

If photos on apps are super blurry, it makes them look like photos of photos which they sometimes are. And since we have cameras on our phones and our computers and all over the place, we don't need to be using photos on our profiles that are old enough to be actual paper photos. Unless it's like a cute baby throwback but personally, I don't really need to see those in Bumble profiles, either. There's no reason that your current digital photos need to be blurry either, because if you take a blurry photo you can just take another one. Makes no sense, and I worry that if you don't know how to take a photo we just aren't going to meshing. Plus, I need to see what you look like. The same goes for photos that are oddly cropped so that I can only see you eat. Major left swipe. Major. Do yourself and us a favor and don't do this.

10 Asking To Meet Too Quickly

This probably varies from person to person like anything else, but personally, I don't find it appealing when a guy acts overly rushed to meet IRL because it seems desperate. Like, I need to feel you out for a couple days of casual chatting and stalk your life before I determine whether I'm interested in meeting you. The only people that I've actually really met (and ended up dating) were all normal acting and normal seeming people who also felt like it was natural to chat for a while before moving onto the next step. The guys on the other hand who match and then ask to meet the following day are slightly alarming to me. You already know that you want to meet me? Why? Let's be reasonable and find out something about each other before we jump into that territory. It's going to go so much better of both of us if we just wait.

9 Saying They Don't Know Why They're On Here

I see a lot of people trying to explain why they're on the dating app, which really isn't necessary since the only people seeing that are also on the app. But a lot of guys also will say "I don't know why I'm on here" in their bio and that's just super confusing and weird. If you have to protect your ego by pretending that it's silly, then it just makes you look immature and not really the type of person that I'd want to date. By dumbing down the concept you're actually sort of insulting me, since I am also on the app and legitimately looking for cuties. If for some reason your friends did actually sign you up or you have no idea why you're there it really isn't necessary to say so, since more than anything it become pretty off-putting. And when your bio is off-putting, that means that less people will talk to you and you become a self fulfilling prophecy of not knowing why you're there.

8 Not Showing Their Face

I get the concept of showing that you live an active life by throwing up a surfing or hiking photo, but all of your photos shouldn't be action shots from a distance. I don't even really need to know that you're capable of doing a handstand because while it's sort of interesting since I can't do one, pretty much half the guys on Tinder can. It's been done. If all of your photos are taken from a distance we can't see your face, and while that might be your intention it's not a very good one. Don't assume in advance that anyone is going to have an opinion of what you look like either way, just let us see so that we can make our own decisions. Because while it's cool that you seem to be a good surfer, I don't know literally anything else about you and surfer has never been on my list of must have qualities in a man.

7 Following Up With Something Rude

I will never understand why guys follow up with something rude if things don't go their way. Well, okay, of course, I understand why they do it... I just don't agree with it. The only reason why you would insult a woman or throw a weird comment at her is because you feel out of control and are trying to take back control, but it's obvious and it's a bad look and it needs to stop. For example, if you don't hear back from a girl, you don't need to harass her about it because then you're solidifying the fact that it's over. There's no bouncing back from that. However, there is always the off chance that she just didn't see the message yet and was planning to respond. Maybe she was asleep. Although I guess if people are showing their true colors early on, that can help a lot in the vetting process, and we all definitely need all the help we can get.

6 Making Jokes That Don't Translate

Yes, you should always be yourself and yes, it's totally fine to be funny when you're trying to be appealing to someone, but a lot of guys lose it on dating apps in these moments. The thing is that when you haven't met someone and you don't have any idea what their sense of humor (or lack thereof) is, some jokes fall flat and can even come off as slightly insulting. This isn't to say that guys shouldn't try to be entertaining, but perhaps leave out anything that might possibly make her cringe. Or wait until you actually get us in person to start cracking those types of jokes when we can appreciate your vocal delivery and know that you're otherwise pretty nice and entertaining and whatever else. If we're just chatting with you and haven't even met you, we have no idea what we're supposed to find funny or rude/insulting, so just be careful.

5 Using Only One Photo

I would never in a million years swipe on a person who only uses a single photo. We all have that one photo where we look shockingly remarkable, and sure use it as the main photo to get attention but having other photos is crucial. We're in the midst of this era where people are taking photos all day every day of themselves doing pretty much nothing, so it's not like you have to dig through a shoe box to find pictures of yourself or something. You should have plenty of them, and you should even have plenty of them where you look remarkably good. The only thing it says if you have a single photo is that you are a bot, you didn't feel like putting any effort into this which of course makes it seem like you don't care what happens at all, or that the single photo is the only good one that you have which as mentioned seems weird.

4 Using Photos From The Same Day

If all of the photos in a bio are taken on the same day, it makes it look like guys have no life. Yes, you get some points for using recent photos I suppose, although if you have your Instagram available like you should then that's pretty easy to see anyway. But it's truly bizarre and it's really not all that helpful to see three different angles of you in the same blue shirt driving in your car. What is this supposed to say? That you had to really hustle to come up with six different photos, that's what it says. And again, anyone who doesn't have any photos of them doing normal life things...or wearing a couple different shirts. That just honestly seems odd. Can't you at least come up with a photo of you and your nephew like literally everyone else can? How about your mom? We've all seen those mom  photos.

3 Over-Edited Photos

No one male or female should be over editing their photos on dating apps because there's really no point since reality will come back to haunt you anyway, but this is especially true when it comes to guys. I don't know a lot of women who would find it appealing if their boyfriend used more smoothing filters than they did. Guys should not be trying to look like flawless Barbie dolls on Tinder. It's honestly really weird. The only photo editing that should be done is cropping when it makes sense, or fixing the light or contrast or something. No to face smoothing. If your intentions are to actually meet people in real life it's baffling why you would want to present an untrue version of yourself. A good version sure...but not a fake one. You might land some first dates but don't be alarmed when they don't turn into second ones.

2 Not Including Social Media

Before I'll even swipe on a person, I want to go stalk them pretty sufficiently. Since these apps don't have last names on them, it's pretty reasonable to put an Instagram handle to help people out. Tinder even gives the option to link them together. To me, if a guy doesn't include any social media or way to find out more about him, I feel like he's hiding something, even if what he's actually hiding is just a very low-key life. You can learn a lot about people from looking at their social media, including if they look like the rest of their photos, if they seem to hang out at the same types of places that you do, if they have a lot of friends, and even if they have mutual friends. These are all fair things to know before you agree to meet a person... in my very strong opinion. But I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels this way.

1 Being Super Negative In Their Bio

Talk about a turnoff. When a guy is super negative and nitpicky in his bio, I find this really weird and I'm sure that every girl agrees with me. Things like "these things never work" or "swipe left if you use a Snapchat filter" or weird misogynistic jokes just aren't appealing. Calm down bro, your bio reads like a thinly veiled cover up for how scared you are to be using this. Yeah, Snapchat filters can be totally bonkers but why don't you just cross that bridge when you get to it instead of being weird, since there are probably some pretty hot girls using Snapchat filters from time to time that you're bugging for no reason. Anyone who is that picky or pretends that they have the right to be, seems a little arrogant/frightened to put themselves out there. Just be a nice human like you're supposed to be in general and see what happens. You're going to get much further.

More in Love