A healthy sex life is essential to a long-lasting relationship. Even though there are more important things than sex, like the emotional bond you have with your partner, intercourse is still a huge part of any relationship. Unfortunately, after you’ve been dating a certain someone for a while, sex can start to feel stale. After all, you already know all of your partner’s best moves and you know what you can do to drive them nuts, so there are never any surprises. However, you don’t have to use the same techniques in the same order every single time you two decide to slip under the sheets. Forget the phrase “if it’s not broke, don’t fix it,” because sex is meant to feel different each time you have it, even when you’ve been with the same person for decades.
If sex has been feeling like a chore lately, then you need to do something that’ll make it exciting again. Sometimes, all it takes is a quick trip to an adult shop to buy some new props. In other cases, all you have to do is move to a different room of the house or initiate sex at a different time of day. No matter what your arrangement is, here are a few surefire ways to spice up your stale sex life:
15 Use Toys
Bedroom toys aren’t only meant to be used when alone. They can be a great way to add excitement to your sex life with your partner. After all, there are dozens of different types of toys, so there’s bound to be something that you and your partner will both enjoy. There are even toys that you can place in your underwear and let your partner control while you’re out in public. As long as you both feel comfortable using a certain toy, then nothing should stop you from doing so.
14 Try Roleplaying
Some people claim that human beings aren’t meant to be monogamous. After all, even if you’re completely loyal to your partner, it’s normal to feel the urge to sleep with someone else. That's why roleplaying is a great way to spice up your sex life. When you get bored with your partner, you don’t have to leave them. You can just ask them to play the role of someone else in the bedroom. They can pretend to be someone cliché, like the pool boy or a maid, or they can take on the role of your favorite actor from a film or television show. Choose whatever character you’re the most turned on by.
13 Use Bondage
If you’re sleeping with someone you trust, then the idea of being tied up shouldn’t scare you. As long as you create a safe word in order to tell them when you’re feeling uncomfortable, they should stop whenever you tell them to do so. Of course, you don’t always have to be the one who is handcuffed or tied to the bedpost. If you’re normally the one who takes the lead in every sexual situation, then it will be a nice change of pace to play the submissive role in the bedroom. It’ll give your partner a chance to feel powerful, and it will give you a chance to lean back and just enjoy the sensations you feel.
12 Create A Romantic Atmosphere
A messy room littered with candy wrappers isn’t going to feel as sensual as a clean, candlelit room. That’s why you should set aside some time to add special touches to your bedroom. Spreading flower petals over the bed, lighting some candles, and putting down silky sheets are all ways to enhance your sexual experience later on in the evening. The more romantic the atmosphere is, the easier it’ll be for you and your partner to become intimate. Of course, it’s also important to make sure that your doors are locked and curtains are drawn, so that you’re not constantly worried about your roommate or child bursting into the room.
11 Naughty Stories
Some couples enjoy watching adult films together. However, that can cause jealousy issues and body issues. That’s why it’s best to find an erotic novel that the two of you can read together. If you’re not a bookworm, then you can try creating an erotic story of your own. It’s a great entry into dirty talking. All you have to do is tell your partner what you’d love to do to them and then let them say what they’d like to do back to you. If you’re uncomfortable saying such dirty things aloud, then you can start out by writing the actions down in a love note or by texting it to them during the day as a form of foreplay.
10 Be Spontaneous
Sex will start to feel stale if you always use the same moves at the same time of day in the same location. That’s why you should shake up your sexual routine by changing minor pieces of it. If you always have sex before you go to bed, try initiating it in the morning instead. If you only do it in your bed, then you should try doing it on the couch or in the shower instead. If you want to get really risqué, then you can even try doing it in a public place, like a restroom in a restaurant or a changing room in the mall.
9 Turn Off Your Electronics
Unless you’re playing music to set the mood, you shouldn’t have on any electronics while you’re having sex. If you hear your phone beep, then you’ll have the urge to check it. If you keep the television on, then you might focus less on your partner’s kisses and more on the show that’s on the screen. In order to have the best sexual experience possible, you should be giving your partner your full attention. That way, you can enjoy every touch and every sound that they make. If turning off your electronics doesn’t stop you from getting distracted by the objects in your room, you could even place a blindfold on in order to enhance your other four senses and prevent your mind from wandering.
8 Learn To Lap Dance
Strippers shouldn’t be the only ones who know how to give lap dances. If you want to do something extra special for your partner, you can take a class in order to learn how to perform seductive dances. There are even poles that you can install in your room if you’d prefer to learn how to pole dance. Either way, your partner will appreciate the fact that you’ve been working hard in order to learn a new skill for them. Plus, learning that new skill will boost your confidence, which is a trait that will make your sex life flourish.
7 Have A Boudoir Shoot
A great way to spice up your sex life is by surprising your partner with sexy little gifts. One of the best things you could give them is a series of photographs of you at your finest. You can either hire a professional photograph to take tasteful photos of you for a boudoir shoot, or you can take your own selfies with your cell. Either way, your partner will be pleased with what they see. Sending them the snapshots is a great way to foreplay before you see each other. That way, you’ll both be eager to sleep together by the time you’re in the same room again.
6 Make Every Touch More Intense
Some people shy away from using lube, because they think it means that something is wrong with their body. However, lube doesn’t have to be saved for the occasions when a woman’s parts are feeling too dry. It can be used at any time in order to enhance the sexual experience. After all, there are lubes that are fit for different occasions. There are brands that are meant to warm your skin up to make every touch more intense, and there are brands that are meant to be paired with sex toys to assure that things go smoothly. Using lube is nothing to be embarrassed about. It can actually save your sex life.
5 Recreate Your First Night Of Sex
A couple’s sex life usually peaks when they just start dating, because everything feels fresh and new. However, it doesn’t matter if you have been with your partner for months or decades, because you can recreate that initial feeling that you had when you were falling in love. All you have to do is remember what you two did the first time that you had sex. Then you should try to recreate the occasion as best you can by mimicking the conversations you had, the outfits you wore, and the locations you visited. It’s a fun way to turn up the heat for a night.
4 Wear Lingerie
After two people have been dating for a while, they tend to care less and less about their physical appearances. They know that their partner loves them for who they are, so they no longer feel the need to wear fancy clothes in the hopes of impressing each other. However, when you look sexy, you feel sexy. That’s why it’s a great idea to go out and buy lingerie that you can wear in front of your partner. Seeing the way that you’re dressed will turn your partner on, and seeing their reaction should turn you on, too. That's why a quick trip to the mall is one of the easiest ways to make your sex life feel sexy again.
3 Change Your Diet
There are certain foods that are considered aphrodisiacs, like watermelon and fish, which supposedly boost a person’s libido. If you’re going to create a meal for your partner or take them on a romantic picnic, then you should feed them aphrodisiacs in order to heighten the sexual tension. Even though some people don’t believe that aphrodisiacs actually work, it has been proven that a man’s libido will increase when he loses belly fat. That’s why it’s important to remain on a healthy diet if you want your sex life to flourish. The healthier you are, the more ready and willing you’ll be to have sex.
2 Sext During The Day
Technology isn’t going to kill your love life. It can actually save it. Since most couples don’t engage in foreplay for very long before they have sex, sexting can help you two set the mood hours before you see each other. You can either send your partner a naughty message about how badly you want to rip their clothes off, or you can send them a picture of the sexy outfit you’re planning on wearing for them later. As long as you send them a message that gets them excited for the night ahead, then you can consider it a healthy form of foreplay.
1 Explore Your Fantasies
Communication is the key to a long lasting relationship and a satisfying sex life. That’s why you should ask your partner to tell you their fantasies, no matter how embarrassing they are. As long as you don’t judge each another, then admitting your kinks can strengthen your bond. Besides, if you’re both willing to act out a certain fantasy, you’ll have a fun night ahead of you. If you love and trust your partner, then there’s no reason to keep your sexual preferences a secret. Being honest with each other and trying new things is the best way to spice up your stale sex life.