For the record, that thing where only women reject men? That’s a fairytale. Okay, a bitter version of a fairytale. In real life, men also reject us even before we get to tell them how we feel. Sometimes, it’s a blessing in disguise. Other times, it’s nothing but a ball of pain that keeps rolling around our bedroom, not finding its way out even when we’ve opened the door so wide. It hurts to be rejected, but what hurts more is when you can’t get over it. There are two ways to look at this: either you’re really having a hard time getting over it or you refuse to get over him. Needless to say, these two are breaking your soul slowly. And if you’re not sure if his rejection is the reason why you’re in so much pain or if it’s just you over-reacting, we’ve got the signs to help you out.
15 You're Still Hopeful
The thing about women is that we’re all good at pretending. Okay, not all of us but most of us. There are so many women out there who pretend they’re okay, who pretend they’ve gotten over their ex and all the drama, but really, they haven’t. So we suggest you check in with yourself. Have you really gotten over your man rejecting you, or are you still hopeful that he will change his mind? Are you secretly wishing deep inside that he would see what you see and would decide he’d want to build a relationship with you? We get it, being rejected is painful. It’s super scary to reveal how you feel for someone and to receive a negative response about it? It sucks! But that’s not a reason for you to torture yourself and keep on hoping when really, there’s nothing.
14 You Keep Checking Up On Him On Social Media
Social media stalking is yet another one of the most common signs that you haven’t gotten over being rejected by the man you’re so madly in love with. Some women think stalking their man on social media is fine, even if the guy is already in a relationship with someone else and he’s been clear about that. Girl, if you think you can change things by stalking him on social media, that’s highly unlikely to happen. If you think you can attract him by posting hot photos on social media, that’s also highly unlikely. Stop torturing yourself by stalking this man on social media, okay? We get it, you loved him, you expected something, but you don’t always get things your way. Sometimes, no matter how hard we try, a person is never going to be ours. Just let it go.
13 You Still Ask Your Friends To Bring Over Some Ice Cream At 2 am
So, what’s your excuse for calling your girlfriends and begging them to bring you ice cream or pizza in the middle of the night? We’re guessing you told them you’re so tired or you’re stressed or worse, you told them you’re depressed and you badly need them as your support system. Yeah, those excuses are far more common than you think. The next time you’ll call your gal pals and ask them to come over with a box of pizza, please think of a more creative excuse. If it’s been months already since the horrific reveal that the guy you love is not into you and you’re still calling your pals for some comfort food, this is a sign that you haven’t really gotten over his rejection yet. So we suggest you stop denying that or else, you’ll just hurt yourself even more.
12 You Keep On Questioning Your Beauty
When was the last time you wondered if you really are beautiful? When was the last time you considered buying something, anything, because you think if you buy this thing, it’ll make you more beautiful… girl, stop it, okay? You’re pretty, you’re gorgeous, and we’re pretty sure you’re a good person deep inside too. Or else you won’t have gal pals you can call in the middle of the night. What we’re trying to say is, if you’re still questioning your beauty, and if you’re often wondering if you’re beautiful enough to be loved, consider that a painful sign that you’re still dwelling in the idea that you got rejected. We’re not saying forget the pain and move on, we know that’s not easy to do. But at least, stop doubting your own gorgeousness. Believe it or not, someone out there will soon see your radiance.
11 You Deny And Feel Ashamed About Keeping Tabs On Him
And then there are the instances when your gal pals have had enough of your annoying habit of stalking your almost-boyfriend. So they call you out and they tell you to stop it (pretty much the same way we’re telling you to stop torturing yourself, only 10x more brutal because they are your tribe). What do you do? Girl, if you keep on denying that you’re keeping tabs on him if you keep on denying that you’re not keeping yourself updated about what he is doing with his life or if you’re ashamed about this habit of yours, that’s a sign. That’s a sign that you’re still in so much pain and instead of making things better for yourself, this sign and toxic habit of yours is just making things worse. Girl, maybe it’s time to put things into perspective. Maybe it’s time to think about yourself. Admit that there is pain and move on.
10 You Still Replay The Good Times
So, let’s say this almost-boyfriend who rejected you was once a good friend. Of course, you two have had great memories together. You can’t count the times you had so much fun with him. If instead of trying to forget about him and trying to move on from the pain, you keep on rewinding to these good times, that is your sign, woman. You’re still troubled by the fact that he rejected your love for him. You still hate yourself for admitting you love him in the first place. Heck, you probably want to punish yourself for telling him how you feel! But girl, it’s already done. Besides, keep in mind that it’s better to be honest. So just let it go, okay? Stop rewinding to the good times, stop trying to ask what ifs after what ifs. You did what you think was right.
9 You Keep On Looking For Him In Other People
Seriously woman, why in the world would you do this? Okay, this is the time to admit it. We’re not going to judge you and if you’re reading this with your gal pals, we’re pretty sure they won’t judge you as well. (Okay, maybe they would but that won’t matter, they’re your tribe and judging you is part of their job.) If you’re guilty of looking for this man in other people, it’s time to step back and think about things as clear as you can once and for all. What is your goal here? Are you planning to torture yourself forever? Are you still hopeful? Because if you are, we’re telling you it is time to kill that hope. It’s not going to take you anywhere. It’s just going to ruin your future relationships with other people because you’re expecting them to be someone they’re not, but someone else whom you wish they are.
8 You Can’t See Past Your “Relationship” With Him
In other words, you’re stuck. You’re stuck in that moment when you told him you love him and he told you he doesn’t feel the same way. You’re stuck in the moment where he became honest with you and rejected your love. Come to think of it, girl… don’t you think it’s better that he was honest and he told you he doesn’t want your love, than him playing around and using you because he knows you love him? See? You’re stuck and because of this, you can’t think clearly. You can’t see that it’s time you prioritize yourself. Girl, being rejected is part of being human. Stop dwelling on it and start making things better for yourself. Start seeing past through your relationship with this guy, whatever kind of relationship that is, and you will see that a lot of people out there are willing to love you.
7 You Feel So Messed Up That He Was The One Who Left
If you hate yourself for being the one who was left behind instead of being the one who walked away, you’re not alone. A lot of women out there have experienced being rejected. A lot of women out there were once failed by their very own bravery. So if you feel so messed up that you were the one who was left behind, don’t worry too much about it. Don’t feel too bitter and most definitely, don’t ever think you’re alone. You are not. But instead of dwelling on this feeling, consider taking a break from the world. Consider spending more time with yourself. This is when you need to heal, woman. Give that to yourself because you deserve it. Accept the fact that sometimes, we’re the ones who leave and other times, we’re the ones who are left behind.
6 You’re Unsure Of Your Worth
When you start questioning your worth because, well, someone left you, this is a sign that you haven’t gotten over his rejection just yet. In times like this, we suggest you spend more time with the people who truly love you. Just because one man did not love you and this same man cannot accept your love for him doesn’t mean you’re not worthy of love. Heck, you are worthy of so much more, girl! You’re worthy of a spot here on earth! You’re an amazing person and being unsure of your worth is totally normal. We all experience it. So when it’s happening to you, seek refuge in the love of your tribe. Allow yourself to be broken and then, allow yourself to heal. Keep in mind that there are a lot of people out there who truly love you for who you are.
5 You Hookup Like There’s No Tomorrow
This may sound like normalcy but really, it’s not. Some women hookup like there’s no tomorrow because it’s in their system. It’s their hobby. It is something they do to have fun and to make the most of life. But if you’re not that kind of woman, but suddenly you find yourself in this hookup spree after a man rejected you, well, you can blame it on the rejection. This is not you evolving into a different person, and most certainly, this is not you evolving into a better person. This is you trying to kill the pain by being with someone new every single night. Girl, being with different strangers in bed one night after another is not going to help you move on from being rejected by the man you love. Face it, okay? And just wait for the pain to die on its own.
4 You Keep On Thinking What It Was You Did Wrong
Stop. For the love of all holy, just stop. If you’re doing this and you’ve been doing this for the past weeks (or worse, past months) just stop. There’s nothing wrong with you, woman. And there is certainly nothing wrong with what you did if what you did was simply telling the guy you kinda like him. This is a clear sign that you haven’t really gotten over his rejection and you’re still hoping your almost-boyfriend would, somehow, still consider being your real boyfriend. Not only are you belittling yourself, you’re also doubting yourself for nothing and really, it’s not healthy. This is the time when you need to accept the fact that some people just don’t want to be loved, probably because they know they cannot love you back. That’s better than being tricked and used.
3 You’re Practically Begging Him To Come Back
And then there’s the begging… girl, if you’re begging this man to come back, whether that’s to come back as your boyfriend or as your friend or whatever, you’re not doing yourself any good. In fact, you’re just making the situation worse. Stop begging this guy to come back because even if he does, it’s not going to be good. Okay? Him, being around after that painful rejection is not going to be a happy ending. You will most likely find yourself in so much pain than that time he rejected you. Keep in mind that anything forced isn’t going to do you any good. So just focus on yourself, will you? Love yourself more and hang out with your tribe. Be with your friends who truly love you and the next thing you know, you’ve gotten over that painful experience!
2 You’re Too Sensitive About Being Rejected In Anything
Sometimes, because we’re so desperate to get over the pain, we tend to pretend it’s not there. And again, worry not because you’re not alone in this. But if this is you then chances are, you’re trying to be normal again. You’re trying to go out more and be the social butterfly that you used to be. And for a moment or two, you think you’ve really gotten over the pain. But if you find yourself in relationships with people where you’re being too sensitive about rejection of any kind, well, that’s a sign you’re still carrying the pain. It can be pain, it can be trauma, whatever that is, and you’re still not 100% okay. Now, is this wrong? Not really. But this is a sign you need to spend more time with yourself and love yourself more until you get to the point where being rejected won’t be so much of a big deal anymore.
1 You Mold Other People You’re With Into Becoming Your Ex
After that rejection, have you ever observed yourself as a girlfriend? Just because you’re in the relationship scene again doesn’t mean you’re okay. Sometimes, you still have a grudge inside you and it’s just right to work on that grudge until it dies, or else it’ll ruin your life. So, how are you with men? Do you love them for who they are? Do you accept them and their flaws? Or do you mold them to become the man who rejected you so you can continue your fantasy of being with him? Because if you’re doing the latter then girl, you need to do something about it. We all have our own ways of coping with pain, but finding someone you love in other people, or worse, molding other people and forcing them to become someone they’re not but someone you love? That’s going to be a problem.