With all the dating apps waiting for you to download them, there’s no question why a lot of us women tend to be confused about relationships. Apparently, it’s awkward to ask “so hey, are we going to call each other boyfriend and girlfriend now or still just ‘close friends’?” So we end up guessing. We end up looking for signs and asking our friends to look for signs too. While we are the ones putting ourselves in situations where we almost have to juggle the men in our lives (okay, not all of us women, but a lot of us), we can’t say being confused is entirely a woman’s fault. Men should also learn how to be brave enough to tell us whether or not they’re into us. Heck, these boys should be brave enough to walk away when they don’t really want us! So to all women with almost-boyfriends, here are 15 signs he will be nothing more than an almost-boyfriend.
15. The Relationship Exists On Your Phone Only
Just because there is constant communication doesn’t mean everything’s going well. In fact, communication is not that reliable these days anymore. Just think about it, you get to communicate with multiple men on Tinder every single day… this is the same with the man you’re texting and chatting with. Don’t be too confident that he is actually your boyfriend when all he does is text you and chats with you on Facebook and Snap. If your so-called relationship exists on the phone only, chances are he will always be your almost-boyfriend and nothing more. We’re not saying he’s a bad person or anything, but it’s always good to know where you stand. Phone relationships are not always nice, you know. It’s different for a long-distance relationship too, if that’s what you’re thinking. Couples who are far from one another don’t have a choice but to utilize modern tech.
14. He Doesn’t Want To Talk About Serious, Big Stuff
The refusal of discussing big stuff is yet another sign that he is nothing but an almost-boyfriend. We’re all big fans of taking it slow and taking your time. But there’s nothing wrong with having small talks about big things, like living under one roof or meeting the parents. After all, it’s just small talk. But if your man is afraid or hesitant to even bring up those big topics, don’t expect him to bring them up anytime soon, or ever. Or maybe, it’s just you imagining that he is your boyfriend and you’re waiting patiently for him to be willing to talk about those things. Girl, we cannot always put the blame on men. Sometimes, we need to check in with ourselves as well, make sure we’re not making up relationships in our head. If a man is not into you, imagining that he is won’t make a difference. You will just end up hurting yourself and ruining whatever relationship you two have.
13. He Makes Unrealistic Plans
And by unrealistic plans, we mean those plans that make zero sense at all. If your man knows you two are both having a stable lifestyle in your city, and still, he is considering moving elsewhere, you can say this man is imagining things for the two of you. He’s not delusional, it’s just that you two have been close friends for so long that he ended up feeling confusing about things. But because his heart is making it clear that he’s not in love with you, he ends up making the most of what he can control – the brain – and he imagines a life with you. He makes plans he actually has no intention of putting into action. This, dear woman, sucks. A lot. So if you want to spare yourself from pain, might as well fix everything between you two and make everything clear. No matter how difficult it is, believe us when we say it’s for the good of many.
12. He Sends You The Worst Mixed Signals
There’s no clear reason why men send mixed signals. Sometimes they do it intentionally because they love having women being oh-so confused about things. Other times, they’re just unsure about things that they don’t know what exact signal to send your way… they themselves are still figuring it out. Now if this man you’re dating is sending you mixed signals since forever, don’t expect him to send something clearer. In fact, expect him to keep on sending you balls and balls of confusion. Because this man doesn’t really have plans of taking things to the next level with you. He will be your almost-boyfriend forever so the moment you realize this, consider that the exact same moment when you should start working on yourself. Don’t chase him because he is not worth chasing. He probably just hasn’t figured out what his personal issue is.
11. It Takes Him Forever To Respond To Your Texts
The thing about 50/50 relationships is that they’re so freakin’ confusing. In some instances, men who are unsure about their relationship with you would choose to keep the lines of communication wide open. He would text you and call you and basically connect with you (virtually) every single chance he can get. This is because he wants to make sure that in case he has finalized his feelings and he realized he wants to be your boyfriend, there’s an assurance that you’re there. And then, there are those instances when men would take forever to reply to your texts… these men focus more on the quiet aspects of things. These men choose to take forever to respond to your messages because they’re thinking. Literally. So please, for the love of all holy, stop sending messages after messages or photos after photos. Give the man some time to think.
10. It’s Almost All About Nothing But The Physical
Yeah, yeah, I know… there’s this thing called hookup culture. We all do it and it’s almost like if you don’t do it, or if you haven’t done it, your life is not complete. But girl, keep in mind that hooking up for a few times with the same man is different than hooking up for like, a year, with the same man. The latter sucks. The latter just sounds disgusting. Yep, sorry, I had to use that word. But we at the Talko are all about change. And girl, if you’re with a man who wants nothing but to hook up and all, please, stop. Change your direction and literally turn your back. This man is no good for you and he is certainly not good for any woman for that matter. Men who do nothing but hookup with women are, well, still considered children. They’re just playing around and not yet ready to make a strong commitment. So instead of wasting your time figuring out when you two will officially be together, consider finding someone else who would see more than a hookup partner.
9. He Doesn’t Invite You To His Place
I think it’s common knowledge that inviting your partner to your place or him, inviting you to his place, is a sign that he is ready to take things to the next level. In good relationships, invitations like this don’t just mean spending time in the bedroom the whole time. It means you’re actually welcoming this person to your place and your life. As in, the bigger aspect of your life. You’re seeing this person as someone who you can potentially build a good relationship with. But if this man you’re dating for ages now still hasn’t invited you to his place, that’s probably because he doesn’t see you as someone he would want to build a relationship with. He doesn’t see you as someone he can seriously be in love with. So if you’re in this kind of situation, chances are, you’re with someone who will be your almost-boyfriend and nothing else.
8. He Also Doesn’t Want To Take You To Romantic Places
Of course, if he doesn’t want to take you to his place, there’s a huge chance he doesn’t want to take you to romantic places as well. And I’m not talking about expensive places here, ladies. Anything can be romantic. Any place that is special to him is already romantic on its own. But if he only takes you to typical coffee shops and restaurants with zero importance to him, you can’t really consider that a boyfriend move. Men who actually want to be your boyfriend would go the extra mile to make you feel special. Now if you’re confused, that’s a problem because you’re making things up in your head. You’re assuming that he’s interested in building something special with you when really, he’s just having fun with you and with other girls. Probably with himself, even! So stop, okay? Stop imagining things.
7. He Doesn’t Want You To Refer To Him As Your Boyfriend
Have you ever tried referring to someone as your boyfriend even when you two haven’t discussed it yet? Yeah, we all do that. Sometimes, it only takes one night in one room together to seal the deal. But that’s not the case most of the time. Sure, there are times where you will meet someone so compatible with you that you both know you’re supposed to be in a relationship, and it’s going to be a good relationship. But there are other instances when, no matter how long you’ve been hanging out with this man already, you’re still unsure or he’s still unsure and he makes sure you know that he is. What do you do then? Well, one thing’s for sure: don’t ever call him your boyfriend. This is going to hurt like hell because chances are, he will do everything in his power to let you know that he is not happy with you calling him your boyfriend.
6. He Doesn’t Get Jealous At All
Nobody wants a jealous partner, but because we’re complicated creatures, we want to be with someone who gets jealous, but only occasionally. We find it cute that there’s this person who considers us as “someone special” that he wants us to be his and his alone. But if you’re with a man who doesn’t really care if you hook up with others, hang out with others, and do cool stuff with other men, chances are he is not going to be your boyfriend. This, dear woman, is a clear sign that you’re with someone who will always be your almost-boyfriend and nothing else. He’s probably unsure himself if he loves you (and yes, some men can be unsure for years, they’re weird like that) or he really doesn’t want to be with you and he just can’t say it.
5. He Talks About His Feelings For You But Quickly Shuts Down
This perhaps is one of the most annoying habits of men: they sweet talk you, they talk about their feelings with you, sometimes they even try to build “a future” with you, but apparently, they’re not that interested. They quickly shut down once you start giving in to the conversation and contributing your thoughts and ideas. It sucks because us women, love to talk about the future. We love it when men open up about their feelings, mainly because it’s not often that they do it. So whenever they do, it’s going to be stuck in our brains (sadly, memories have no filter.) Just imagine the agonizing disappointment every woman would feel because of a man who quickly shuts down because, in reality, he’s not that interested in you. Total crap, I must say.
4. He Rarely Invites You To Meet His Friends
Don’t you think it’s great when the men we’re attracted to invite us to meet their friends? Most women are big social butterflies. When we’re attracted to someone or when we think he’s cute, we immediately introduce him to our friends. Heck! We almost want to drag him to our gal pals. So when a man does the same: introduce us to his friends, that’s something. That gives most women the idea that she is special to him and that maybe, just maybe, it’s your man telling you he wants to be with you. Unfortunately, some men just don’t do this: introduce you to his friends. If you’re with someone who doesn’t want his friends to know you, if you’re with someone who doesn’t invite you even to small gatherings with his friends, that’s your sign, girl, that he’s nothing but an almost-boyfriend only.
3. And He’s Never Invited You To Meet His Family
In other cases, men love to send mixed signals, so they would still invite you to meet his friends. Well, not all of his friends but just some of them. He would occasionally tell you to come with him when he’s hanging out with his pals and he would actually introduce you to a friend. But notice how he doesn’t label his relationship with you? Yeah, that’s a sign. If you don’t notice that, at least try to notice how long you two have been “together” and ask yourself why he hasn’t invited you to meet his parents yet. Because sometimes, he just invites you to meet his friends so you won’t doubt his intentions. But really he can’t bring himself to introduce you to his fam (even if you two have been hanging out for months now) because he’s just not that into you. Girl, if you’re seeing this sign clear, please, stop torturing yourself.
2. He Simply Says He Doesn’t Want To Label The Relationship
Don’t you think it sucks when someone you’re interested in and whom you feel is interested in you as well doesn’t want to label whatever you two have? We all want to label our relationships, right? We all want to know if we’re just going to call him friends with benefits, boredom buddy, or boyfriend. But for most men who are so unsure of things and who are just playing around, he wouldn’t want to label the relationship. He won’t want you to call him your boyfriend but more than that, when introducing you to the public – be it close friends or just his colleagues, he would introduce you by your name and nothing else. He won’t even refer to you as his friend! So yeah, it’s a pain in the a**when you’re with someone like this. But if you think it’s just him trying to figure things out, no, that is not the case. Oftentimes, it’s him unsure of what to call you, because he’s sure enough that he doesn’t want to be your boyfriend, but he likes you (for something else).
1. He Clearly Flirts With Other Girls
If you catch him flirting with other girls then what the hell are you waiting for? Why are you still sticking around? Woman, this is your golden sign that you should go far far away from him, as far as you possibly can. He’s not the man for you so stop imagining that he is or that he will be. See, him being your almost-boyfriend is not always his fault. Sometimes, men are too clear about their intentions. Sometimes, it is us, women, who make up stuff in our heads. But of course, there are instances when they send these ridiculously mixed signals. Either way, it is your job to take care of yourself first. Stop thinking about the what ifs and just focus on what feelings you have now, and what you’re SEEING now.
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