It’s the tired, old question every female asks after she meets a guy, gives him her number, and doesn’t hear anything: why hasn’t he called? Meeting a great guy is exciting and giving your number to him is even more exhilarating, but waiting by the phone for his call is not. But we still do it. Why? Hope. He asked for your number so that has to mean he’ll call, right? Nope. There’s plenty of scenarios you and your friends can come up with to understand why Prince Charming has yet to make the call: he probably flushed his phone down the toilet, or thinks you’re too good for him (bless your friends for trying so hard!). However, if you want to get down to the nitty gritty and decode why he asked for your number but hasn’t called it, here are the real reasons why he’s not picking up that phone.
15 He’s Married
You played all the cards right when you first met: checked out his posse (no sign of a girlfriend), listened for him to bring up a significant other (which he didn’t), and even glanced at his ring finger, which was as naked and lonely as yours. Married? Of course he wasn’t married. Well, not so fast. Just because he was out with his boys and didn’t have a ring on, doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a wife waiting at home. So if the two of you hit it off, indulged in friendly banter, and embraced in some serious sexual tension but never heard from him after, don’t worry. It’s not you. It’s him and his marriage standing in your way to romantic bliss.
14 He’s Weird About Your Age
Don’t take this the wrong way. A woman in her thirties is prime dating material. She’s at the perfect age to possess confidence, wisdom, and sexiness, but there’s something else men see when they hear you’re weighing in at 35: marriage. For most women, once they head into their 30s, they tend to think about settling down by getting married, buying a house, and having babies. Men know this and can find it downright intimidating if they aren’t on the same page. Even if you are a single gal in her thirties who is not interested in getting married now (or ever), men still carry that stigma around and find not calling easier than potentially having to discuss wedding plans.
13 He’s Not Into You
So you met a guy, had a great conversation, and definitely thought you felt a spark between the two of you, but when it comes time to calling you, he doesn’t. Well, no matter how great you thought the meeting was, he might not have felt the same and simply wasn’t as into you as you were into him. Sorry girls, but it’s the painful truth. Even if they like your ravishing personality, or striking good looks, if they aren’t fully into the whole package you are selling, they aren’t buying. And in this case, stop waiting by the phone and find someone who does appreciate everything you have to offer, because it’s pretty fantastic.
12 He Got Out Of Something Serious
Women don’t always think of men having real feelings, but surprisingly they do. Seriously. And not just about their love for fantasy football. They have personal feelings that can get in the way of making the first move, ahem the first call. Here’s the thing, if a guy just got out of a serious relationship, he might not be ready to jump into another one yet. So while he might have loved your company and thought you were the hottest thing since Pamela Anderson back in the day, he might be too jaded about his past relationship to pursue anything else - even if it’s just calling you and asking to grab a drink.
11 He’s Not Sure How You Feel About Him
Even the most confident man can feel insecure sometimes, especially when it comes to a confident sex goddess like yourself. Maybe he tried feeling you out at the bar but didn’t get a good enough vibe showcasing your intense physical attraction to him. Or maybe he thought you incorporated him into the “friend zone” because you touched the bowl of peanuts on the bar more than you touched him. If this is the case, he probably will not call. A man wants to feel confident you won’t reject him, so if he doesn’t think you were into him as much as he was into you, he might not take the risk of asking you out.
10 He’s Friends With Your Ex
Ladies, ever hear of the Bro Code? Well, guys take it pretty seriously - most of them anyway - and if your new crush is buddies with your ex-boyfriend, forget about the two of you ever dating. Unless the new guy is a total dirtbag (which if he is, why would you want him to call anyway?), he’s not going to break his Bro Code with his friend (you know, the sad sap you dumped last month?) to call you for a date. Going against the Bro Code is like going against the current in a bad riptide. You just don’t do it.
9 You Appeared Too Needy
This is a tough one to hear, but it needs to be said. If you met a guy out and were already running a list of baby names in your head, he’s going to know. Men can sense it, and when they do, they hightail it for the hills. But what if you weren’t discussing your ideal wedding dress over a glass of Chardonnay? Well, simply giving him googly eyes will scare him off too. If he felt you fall for him right away without even knowing him (or him knowing you), he might think you’re just desperate for a relationship.
8 He’s Afraid Of Commitment
When a guy says he “doesn’t do commitment” that’s your queue to run, and run fast. Don’t think he’s saying this to look like a bad boy or act too cool in front of his friends. He’s telling you something major here: he’s a commitment phobe. This guy won’t call you because he got the feeling you were looking for something serious, when all he’s looking for is a good time. Not hearing from him is a blessing because a date with him will only end up in disappointment later on, like when he tries hooking up with your best friend.
7 The Timing Is Off
The guy you met might really like you, but if he’s not into dating anyone right now this can prevent him from picking up the phone and calling - or texting. You may be the perfect girl for him, showcasing the looks and smarts every guy would dream to have in a mate, but if the timing is off on his biological clock, he won’t make a move. When he is ready, you’ll know, and he’ll be blowing up your phone, but by then, you’ll probably be married with three kids, a dog, and white picket fence.
6 He Wants You To Make The First Move
Believe it or not, the guy who was confident chatting you up at the bar might not be as confident in real life. Sure, after a few drinks he’s mister social, but in reality he’s shy, and now that he has your number, he’s not sure what to do with it. He might not want to call because he’s not sure if you are into him, or he might be too embarrassed to make the first move for fear of looking silly. Completely lame, we know, but if you’re not the one calling don’t expect a guy like him to either.
5 You Jumped The Gun
You met the man of your dreams, had the best time imaginably possible, and now you are waiting to hear from him to make future plans. If only your phone would ring, beep, or do something! But think back to the encounter. Was it really the best time ever or was it the booze talking? Did he really seem that interested or was he chatting with you because his buddy was talking up your friend? Maybe there wasn’t a strong connection like you initially thought, but instead, your strong physical attraction helped blurred your vision into something when it was nothing.
4 You Were on Your Phone All Night
Look, phones are part of our daily lives. Between the emailing, the texting, the calling, it’s hard to think how we lived without our smartphones attached to our fingertips, but it still doesn’t give you permission to be rude. If you are chatting with a new guy (or want to be approached by one) put that phone away. Sure, he took your number, but when he saw how much you were on the phone in his presence - like texting your girlfriends all night explaining how cute he is - he might have instantly regretted his decision and ultimately decided not to call.
3 Busy Pursuing Other Goals (Or Women)
We all lead busy lives, some more than others, which can possibly be the case with the guy who hasn’t called. He might be traveling for work, busy with a new team project at the office, or simply pursing his ex-girlfriend he still wants to be with. A man this busy isn’t about to slow down or use the phone to call just anyone. You might not be the one he’s calling because you haven’t made it on his top priority lists yet. But don’t worry, you’re busy too, and have a remarkable life you’re living on your own. See? Two can play at that game.
2 He’s Waiting A Few Days To Call
If it’s only been a day you haven’t heard from the new guy you’re into, don’t fret. A lot of guys still abide by the three day rule and won’t call you before that. Sure, if he’s really into you, it makes sense he’d call right away - and sometimes they do! - but that doesn’t always happen. The guys that want to keep things cool to appear not overly eager, will tend to wait three days before making the initial move. So give it a few days, and if you don’t hear from him then, move it along because he probably already has.
1 He Forgot Which One You Were
So, you met this suave guy that dished out all the right things to say and the moves to match, which had you feeling like Queen of the world. Great, but he still hasn’t called. So what now? A charmer (AKA a player) like this might have a hard time remembering which number is yours because he got so many the night he met you. He might have mixed your number up with Charlotte’s or Tina’s, and you know what? Let him call one of them. Who wants a guy that’s playing the field so hard he can’t keep track of his score? Game over.