Not every relationship is meant to last forever. Sure, you might be one of the lucky few who find their happily ever after with the first person they ever date, but that's probably not you. You're definitely more likely to experience a breakup or two (or more) in your lifetime. Dealing with that whirlwind of emotions once your relationship comes to an end can be super challenging, and it’s even more difficult when you notice that your ex was able to move on without a second thought. We never expect our ex to move on before we do. In a perfect world, our former flames would spend the rest of their lives wondering where they went wrong and wishing they could somehow win us back. In reality, once you and your boo split up, it’s only a matter of time before one of you decides that you're ready to take another plunge back into the dating pool. Accepting the fact that someone who you thought you’d spend forever with is now planning his forever with someone else can be brutal, but it can also serve as a blessing in disguise. Here are 15 reasons to embrace and accept that your ex has moved on.
15 It Helps You Move On
Maybe seeing that your ex has actually moved on will help you snap out of whatever funk you’re in and encourage you to do the same. We’re not saying that you need to go out and start dating again right away, but at least separate yourself from the past and be able to see that it’s okay to carry on without your ex by your side. Honestly, you don’t need him or anyone else to make you happy. You are fierce all on your own, and what your ex chooses to do in his spare time shouldn’t have any bearing on your life. Um, hello! He’s not your boyfriend, he’s your ex-boyfriend... and that’s a pretty big difference. Finally seeing that your former love is capable of moving on could actually be beneficial to you moving on and accepting things for what they really are. Breakups are no fun, but there are plenty of lessons to be learned from them in the grand scheme of things.
14 You Know Where He Stands
His feelings are pretty clear: you broke up and he has zero intention of getting back together with you. By choosing to move on and start dating other people, it eliminates the possibility of reconciliation between you and your ex. While at first, you might think it totally sucks, this could actually be just the wakeup call you needed to make you realize that you two are definitely dunzo. It’s a confusing and slippery slope trying to figure out where you went wrong and what to do after a breakup. It’s often tempting to make contact with your ex and try to work things out, even though you know that the two of you are better off apart. There are tons of reasons why we want to get back with an ex. For starters, we’re afraid of breaking out of our comfort zone. Just because something is convenient doesn’t mean it’s right. By choosing to date other people, your ex has officially drawn a line in the sand and has made it crystal clear that your relationship is a thing of the past.
13 Bitter Is Never Better
Your most recent breakup has left you feeling sour, and yeah, you're making sure that everyone knows it. You don’t hold back your feelings when someone mentions your ex and you are quick to speak poorly about him to others. Being the bitter ex is definitely not something you want to be, and it will only reflect poorly on you when all is said and done. You’re smart and you know that holding a grudge is unnecessary, so choosing to walk away from whatever lingering feelings you have for your ex is the best decision. You two broke up and he eventually found someone new. So what? While of course, it’s frustrating, don’t let it get to you. You are totally better than that. You don’t have to sink to new lows by showing how bitter you are toward your old flame, and if you do you’ll likely regret it eventually. Take the high road and always remain classy, even in difficult situations like this one.
12 You’re Being Selfish
If you can’t seem to comprehend why he’s still with her and not with you, maybe you should dig a little deeper and find out why you feel this way. Do you really want him back, or do you just not want him to move on because you haven’t done so yet? It’s true what they say, misery really does love company. Just because you aren’t satisfied with the current state of your love life doesn’t justify you interfering with his. Still trying to make moves on your ex and trying to sabotage his new relationship will only blow up in your face. Let’s face it: you’re being totally selfish and you definitely know it. It’s time to start being a little bit more considerate of others instead of doing whatever you can to stop him from going forward with his life. Whatever reasons you think you might have for not accepting that he’s moved on, just let them go. And let him go, too.
11 It’s Not Fair To His New Girl
If we’re being honest, once your ex has officially started dating someone new, you should definitely get over him once and for all. Staying hung-up on someone who you used to date isn’t a good look, and it’s actually pretty unfair to his new girlfriend. You probably could care less about what his new girl thinks or feels, and that’s understandable, but put yourself in her shoes for a moment. What if you were dating someone great but he had a crazy ex-girlfriend who refused to accept the fact that he’s moved on? It sounds like a super uncomfortable situation to be in. You aren’t really in a position to stake claim in your ex like he’s a piece of real estate. He’s actually a person... and he has developed feelings for someone who is equally as invested in him. Don’t be the nightmare ex who won’t let the past go. It’s your job to realize that he’s happy with someone else and you totally have no business imposing on that.
10 You Look Like A Fool
It might be a little harsh to say -- okay, it definitely is -- but if you don’t accept that your ex has moved on then you’ll run the risk of looking like a total fool. You don’t need to chase after someone who doesn’t want you as much as you want them, and you know you deserve much more than that. You can’t keep pursuing your ex after he’s long moved on, and at some point, you’re going to start looking desperate. You don’t want to be that girl. Nobody wants to be someone’s second choice, and he has already made up his mind. There’s really no point in being in denial any longer: he’s moved on and you need to pull yourself together already. Choosing to play games and failing to realize that he’s definitely over you will only leave you with egg on your face. Be the bigger person and be respectful of your ex, his new woman, and most importantly, yourself.
9 It's Time To Start Fresh
Hey, let's not forget one very important thing: you already dated this guy long before his new girl ever came into the picture. You should know that your now-ex has moved on for the pure fact that you’ve already been there and done that. It’s pretty likely that anything his new girl is experiencing, you’ve already experienced it first. Now that you’ve finally broken free from that past relationship, it’s finally time for something new and exciting! Nobody wants to make the same mistakes twice, and you certainly don’t want history to repeat itself. You aren’t really interested in getting back together with him any time soon and you know that there are better options out there. A healthy change has been long overdue, and you might even be kind of relieved that he moved on to someone new because, well, he’s not your problem anymore. A fresh start sure sounds pretty great, doesn’t it?
8 Don’t Give Him The Satisfaction
You should be aware that in some cases your ex might actually take great joy in the fact that you’re still not over him. If he knows that you’re having a hard time accepting that he’s moved on, it might actually give him an undeserving ego-boost. You definitely don’t want that. There’s nothing about him that you can’t eventually find in someone else when you’re good and ready, so don’t get discouraged. Letting him know that you’re still even the slightest bit into him (even when he has someone new) can end up being a recipe for disaster. In his mind, he’s just so super awesome and amazing that nobody will ever compare, and he loves every minute of it. Even if you know that that’s just not the case, he could take great pride knowing that he has not one, but two ladies who have eyes for him. Don’t give him the satisfaction – just gracefully accept that he’s moved on and say nothing more.
7 Say Good Riddance
Sometimes we just want to roll our eyes and give our ex a proper send off. Since you’ve already traveled down this road, you already know all of his flaws and imperfections - and she has absolutely no idea what she's in for. Sure, you may have loved him (flaws and all) but that doesn't mean there weren't things about him that you just couldn't stand. Now it's someone else's turn to deal with all of his annoying behaviors and bad habits. Gone are the days where you have to deal with his immature college frat buddies crashing your alone time. So long are the times when you had to listen to him complaining about nearly everything because he’s a glass-half-empty kind of guy. While you did enjoy parts of the relationship, it’s not so bad to be able to say “good riddance” to your ghost of boyfriends past. If anything, you should probably be wishing his new girl luck because you know she’s going to need it.
6 You Weren’t Meant To Be
Odds are, you’ve probably heard the phrase “it just wasn’t meant to be” at least once, and in this case, it couldn’t be truer. If you and your ex were meant to be together, you would be together. For whatever reason, things between you didn’t work out and you decided to part ways. Both one of you, or both of you, was unhappy in the relationship and you had to go in different directions. Life has a funny way of working things out, so if you are supposed to be together it will happen eventually. You can’t force someone to date you and you definitely can’t change the way they feel. In the long run, maybe breaking up will turn out to be the best thing that has ever happened to you. Right now it might be tough to understand, but there will come a point when you look back at the moments where you felt lost and hopeless about losing your ex and think you were being really ridiculous. You might even want to give your former self a slap in the face as a serious wake-up call.
5 You Need To Accept Reality
Refusing to accept that your ex has moved on from you and your former relationship really doesn’t solve anything, now does it? It’s fine to feel mixed feelings towards the situation, but you know that refusing to acknowledge that your ex is an ex for a reason won’t do either of you any good. Calling, texting, and still holding out hope that you two will rekindle your romance even though he’s with someone new will only hurt you in the long run. This kind of behavior will only set you back when you should be moving forward with your life. The fact of the matter is simple: you are broken up and he can do what he wants. Failing to come to terms with reality won’t change the outcome. You can welcome change with open arms or you can torture yourself by staying fixated on your failed relationship, but you already know which the better option is of the two.
4 He Deserves To Be Happy
Everyone deserves a fair shot at happiness, and as much as you hate to admit it that even includes your ex. Whether the two of you broke things off amicably or in a totally messy way, you know deep down that he has the right to date other people. Just because you might hate him or even still have feelings for him doesn’t mean that he should remain single forever. Think about how much you hope to find someone special. Wouldn’t it be nice if your ex found someone who puts the wind in his sails, too? It’s definitely normal to have resentment toward your former flame because he was able to move on a lot sooner than you were, but once you get past the initial shock you will come to realize that it doesn’t hurt to wish him the best. The truth is, everyone deserves to find love and even though your love story came to an end, your ex deserves to move on (almost) as much as you do.
3 You Should Be Mature
Honestly, knowing that he's moved on to someone else feels like the ultimate gut-punch. Maybe deep down you actually want to cringe at the thought of your old lover getting cozy with someone new, but refusing to let it bother you displays a level of maturity that you should definitely be proud of. You must have learned a lot when it comes to dating, and you’re finally able to put things into perspective. Dealing with the breakup didn’t come easy but you somehow managed to find your way and you have accepted that things are different now. While we wish we could all be so calm, cool, and collected, it understandably doesn’t come easy. Being totally fine with the fact that your ex has moved on shows that you have come a long way and that you really do want what’s best for him – even if that person isn’t you. It takes a strong person to come to grips with the harsh realities that come along with a breakup. You’ve got a handle on it, and you’re definitely ready to move on, too.
2 You Should Keep The Past In The Past
You definitely don’t need anything holding you back from living life to the fullest, especially when it’s an old relationship that you just can’t seem to get over. Of course, it’s not ideal that your ex has moved on before you have, but who really cares? He’s not your problem anymore and you shouldn’t be worried about what he does or who he’s with. You have more important things to do than focus on your ex and his romantic endeavors, and that’s exactly why it’s important to keep the past in the past. You two had some great times and made some great memories, but now you have the chance to experience those things all over again with someone new (and hopefully improved). It can be daunting trying to hash through all of your feelings about someone who you were so invested in, but acceptance is a vital part of moving on. Your ex is a thing of the past and now you can put your attention toward bigger and better things.
1 Your Person Is Out There
You see how he was able to find someone new, even after you? Yup, you’re totally capable of doing that too. This last relationship might not have worked out, but that doesn’t mean you’ll be alone forever. Once you take some time for yourself and enjoy the many perks of being single for a while, you will be ready to venture out and find someone who gives you butterflies. You shouldn’t feel hopeless or afraid of dating again. You might even start to remember that dating can actually be pretty fun. Your ex might have moved on before you did, but that doesn’t mean he’s a winner. It takes time to process your emotions after a tough breakup, so there’s no need to rush into a new relationship right off the bat. You will be able to date when you’re ready and that can only happen at your own pace. Your person is out there somewhere, and it’s definitely not your ex.