Oh sure, we usually like to say things “celebrities! They’re just like us!” whenever we see images of them grocery shopping or sweating after emerging from the gym. But, frankly, we couldn’t be more far from the truth, especially when we find out that they can’t even have a simple hook-up without involving their lawyers. Imagine not being able to trust a potential one night stand (what??!) and having to go through a stack of paperwork before even getting down to the actual deed. In the day and age of Instagram, Snapchat, and Twitter, it’s probably best if some of the most well-known celebrities to go over a few small factors before hopping into bed with someone new. Most groupies have taken to posting pictures of their hookups, so you can never be too careful. But there’s a line between being careful and being just plain weird. There are 15 celebrities who have made partners sign NDA clauses before hooking up to do the nasty.
A couple years ago, there was a pretty massive uproar when a young woman that Drake had hooked up with decided to violate the terms of the NDA form she had signed before engaging the rapper in a one-night stand. I mean, we found out stuff we REALLY didn’t need to hear (stuff that includes some pretty invasive behind play. Yikes) thanks to this girl blowing her cover. The girl reported that walking into Drake’s house was like “walking into the White House” thanks to heavy security. She had to sign an NDA form, security took away her phone so she couldn’t take pictures, and she even had her driver’s license photocopied just to be on the safe side. By revealing what happened following all the paper work, the girl heavily violated the said NDA and probably received more than a slap on the wrist. I wouldn’t be surprised if legal action was brought against her.
14 Miley Cyrus
Miley Cyrus went from darling little child-star to full fledged freak show seemingly over night, so it really does not surprise me too much that she also makes potential partners sign a damn deed before touching her. Only, it is not just paperwork the person has to go through – it is an entire interview process. Yes, that is right. After Miley becomes attracted to someone, the poor individual has to go through the grueling process of going through a series of interviews with Miley’s personal assistants. Given, she is engaged to be married now to actor Liam Hemsworth (though they have broken up a billion and five times so I am sure she’ll be back on the market in the near future yet again), but her single days sounded like asking a series of awkward questions as if she were interviewing a candidate to work summers at the Gap or something.
13 Kanye West
These days, nothing in Kanye West’s life appears to be off limits. With his wife, Kim Kardashian being the queen of reality TV and everything, it’s hard to think that he can securely hide any aspect of his personal life. Back when he was single, potential hook-ups OF COURSE had to sign a non-disclosure agreement so it’s no shock that his marriage is just a pile of paperwork itself. It was reported to TMZ a while ago when West was in the middle of recording his album The Life of Pablo, he made his crew sign a butt load of non-disclosure agreements. According to the clauses, if any person disclosed information about any member of the Kardashian/Jenner clan, they had to pay a fine of up to 10 million dollars. I get that new information regarding the most photographed family in the world can be juicy, but it certainly isn’t worth 10 million freaking dollars. No thank you.
12 Iggy Azalea
Considering what rapper Iggy Azalea went through with one of her exes after fame hit, it’s no surprise that she now makes all potential ex-boyfriends sign a little “love-contract”. Azalea ended up in hot water when ex-boyfriend Maurice Williams (who goes by the rap name Hefe Wine) began the process of releasing recordings Azalea made before she hit the fame jackpot. Even though Iggy turned right around and sued the crap out of Williams, siting that the man violated copyright and trademark, she still took a hit. According to the lawsuit, Williams broke into Iggy’s personal computer and downloaded its contents. And the cherry on top of this screwed up sundae? Williams claimed he had a homemade tape featuring him and a (most likely) under-age Azalea that he threatened to make go viral. While we sometimes huff at these so called “Love NDAs”, Iggy has proven that they are in fact necessary in the long run.
11 Lala Kent
First of all, I only knew what exactly Vanderpump Rules was after stories started flying around regarding a model named Lala Kent and some mystery man she was rumored to be dating. The reality television show is apparently a spin off of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and is a hit on the Bravo channel. There was a lot of gossip about who Kent was dating and the info got so hot that Kent herself made her own friends sign a non-disclosure agreement when Kent and the mystery man rented a house for Coachella and invited all her friends and their spouses. Rumors were spreading that the new boyfriend was some NFL player, but no player would go through the legal hardships of making everyone his girlfriend knows sign an NDA in order to protect his identity (I’m guessing he’s married!). Friends have venomously denied signing any contract of the sort, but since his identity has yet to be revealed, I’m guessing that’s a big fat lie.
10 Taylor Swift
Okay, this HAS to be a joke. Singer Taylor Swift is notorious for getting into high profiled relationships and then turning her heartbreak into record gold, so why on earth would she make former boyfriend Calvin Harris sign an NDA regarding HER? So it’s okay if she does it to men, but not okay if they even utter a single peep about her? This is a tad too hypocritical for my blood. According to sources, Harris was mum about his relationship to Swift (while he was with her) on social media and during interviews because she had him sign a gag order back when they were an item. The public was puzzled that while it was clear the two were an item, neither party would say anything regarding the other. But of course, when all bets were off and the couple parted, it was okay for Swift to write a tell-all book in the form of an album. Sure thing, lady.
9 Justin Bieber
Well, when rumor has it that you tend to nail everything with a pulse, you might want to get together with your lawyers and work out some sort of form to hand out to everyone around you who is still breathing. This is the case with Canadian sensation Justin Bieber, who is known for both his annoying songs and his physical attraction to literally all life around him. Whenever he’s in a serious relationship (I’m shocked I’m not using quotations for the word serious), Bieber has NDA documents written up that include long-term clauses. However, it’s somewhat different when it comes to his groupies. While he also makes them sign non-disclosure agreements, the terms are different and are along the lines of a more “short term” arrangement. I’m assuming this means taking down their information in case a picture or two surfaces on Facebook some time in the near future.
8 Charlie Sheen
Actor Charlie Sheen has been a known tire-fire for years, his fast-paced lifestyle finally catching up with him recently. Sheen admitted last year that he contracted HIV after having unprotected relations, even though he pretty much was the poster child for advocating practicing safe relationships (I’m pretty sure his face is on rubber wrappers everywhere). Sheen also admitted that he had forced all his potential partners to sign confidentiality agreements whenever they’d stay over at his place. Sheen revealed in an interview with Playboy that he went through extreme measures to make sure no one would leak out his secrets (including exposing his HIV diagnosis before he was ready to admit it to the world). “We take phones and purses at my house, and people have to sign s**t,” the actor said. “I’m not living in the Pentagon, but I’ve been burned enough to take precautions.”
7 Chris Brown
Ah, Chris Brown – your friendly neighborhood woman beater who won’t go away no matter how many car accidents he gets into. It’s no shocker that it turns out the hip-hop jerk… er, artist… makes potential hook-ups sign an NDA before they’re allowed to “roll” with them. According to one groupie who took him up on his offer, Brown had his security team approach her at a party she was attending and made her sign the form right then and there before she was allowed to make eye-contact with Brown (I’m guessing that last part – he only made her sign it before she was allowed to be alone with him). Again, this is one artist who doesn’t surprise me when it comes to keeping his lawyer on a short leash. After everything he went through with Rihanna and his overly physical ways, I’m pretty positive there are some suspicious clauses embedded in those NDAs.
6 Ben Affleck
Actor Ben Affleck’s love life has been in the spotlight for years – starting with love Gwyneth Paltrow, to dating Jennifer Lopez (ANYONE REMEMBER BENNIFER?), to finally settling down with Jennifer Garner in order to spit out a couple of kids. But, of course, when you’re in the public eye practically every aspect of your life will be revealed in the tabloid circuit. Affleck allegedly had an affair with wife’s nanny Christine Ouzounian, which ended up leaking out DESPITE the fact that he made her sign an NDA. Even after the young woman signed the non-disclosure, she would post intimate photos onto her social media accounts, including a photo of her wearing quarterback (and friend of Affleck) Tom Brady’s Super Bowl ring while she and Affleck were flying across the country with Brady. Details of the affair started leaking out and every twist and turn the new couple went through was revealed in print and online, until both Garner and Affleck eventually split. Maybe have those lawyers make those forms a little bit more iron-clad, eh?
5 Bill Cosby
As we are all aware now, actor/comedian Bill Cosby is a walking piece of trash. The once beloved Cosby as been accused by an absurd amount of women of being an assaulter, liar, and disgusting human being. Cosby allegedly drugged and took advantage of a shocking number of women and is currently battling against some of the victims in court. During his trial in 2015, one such victim claimed that Cosby had her sign an NDA in order to keep her quiet. This most likely happened before the actual drugging and assault and after everything was said and done, Cosby used the NDA as a scare tactic. Other women have stepped forward and announced the same thing (even though Cosby had started this “practice” of sedating women and then physically assaulting them as far back as the 1980’s, the women who claim to have signed the NDA were the more recent women). The more these cases unfold, the more horrifying it gets.
4 Lamar Odom
Former NBA player Lamar Odom seemed to sign his entire private life away when he made the decision to start dating Khloe Kardashian. By 2009, the two were married and as we all know, the marriage only lasted a few years before they separated in 2011. It didn’t take long before Kardashian even dropped Odom as a last name and started picking up other NBA players (she dated Houston Rockets guard James Harden following the split). As we all know, Odom went on a rampage in attempt to win back Khloe, and his health started slipping away from him. One night, while visiting the Las Vegas Bunny Ranch, Odom overdosed on drugs and went into a coma, which managed to send his estranged wife running back to his side. What a lot of people don’t know is that Odom actually made everyone present at the Ranch sign NDA forms in order to keep his happenings there hush-hush. This actually turned out to be a good thing since Odom came out of his coma and the tabloids started swarming in order to get pictures and stories of what went down at the Ranch that night.
3 Britney Spears
Britney Spears has never really had a smooth relationship according to the tabloids. Back when she was just a wide-eyed good girl, Spears dated pop-star Justin Timberlake and no matter how much they tried, they couldn’t keep the press out of their relationship. She then went on to get married for five minutes in Las Vegas, have a very public meltdown, before she was finally able to find some peace and revive both her career and family life. Good news is she learned from her past mistakes. TMZ reported that Spears made then-boyfriend Charlie Ebersol sign a non-disclosure agreement before he ever even MET her. The duo were set up by mutual friends, Spears’ father insisted that Ebersol sign an NDA before their first date just to be on the safe side. Ebersol claimed it was no big deal since it’s known that Spears makes everyone go through this protocol – at least the ones who are potential love interests.
2 Scott Disick
In the most recent episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, Kourtney’s former flame and father of her children is attempting to get over his ex by hooking up with other women. Even though sis Kim Kardashian is aware of this, she stumbles upon a young woman (who apparently spent the night with Scott Disick) in his hotel bathroom and ends up “shaming” the girl by calling her a groupie and tramp before storming out. Good news is, Disick apparently has all his hook-ups (that aren’t named Kourtney) sign NDAs before bedding them. He also makes them give up their cell phones before the deed too. Considering the fact that this new young woman was shamed on television (even though the audience didn’t see her face), tabloids will be swarming to find out more about her and will be willing to pay any price. Hopefully Disick made this one sign something, because if not – ouch, is he in for it.
1 Jennifer Lopez
Jennifer Lopez’s love life has never been a secret, nor has she wanted it to ever be one considering the way she paints new beaus on her Instagram account. Her newest flavor of the month happens to be MLB star Aaron Rodriguez, the duo even all but confirming it after being seen together at the Met Gala. Before, she was apparently dating Drake (though people just assume that was to promote an album) and then some other youngins as well. What’s odd here is that while most celebrities have potential mates sign NDAs before diving into a long term relationship, Lopez had former beau Casper Smart sign one AFTER the relationship had ended. She had him sign an NDA following their split so he wouldn’t trash her to the tabloids or reveal the intimate details of their courtship. I suppose if he truly respected her, he would sign (which he did) but a lesser man would have been like “this should have been given to me prior to the relationship – peace out, I’m headed to TMZ.”