So what makes a grown man weak? Apparently, many things. Who would’ve known? Well, we would’ve because women know things –we’ve got intuition. But what takes us beyond intuition and into the compassion realm is the honesty of these guy’s confessions about their biggest and/or smallest insecurities. Yes, grown men have been known to cry on more than a few occasions, but rarely in front of our faces, ladies. But more often than not, they have also been known to bottle up their emotions for the sake of social status. That’s why these candid confessions, which are really self-reflections, pull on our heart strings. We can see that men have their hang ups, too. There is something so comforting in that. We are not the only ones suffering the injustice of social standards of beauty. Well, if we were all smart enough, we’d say to hell with beauty standards and just accept ourselves the way nature made us. But for those of us still stuck in the consumerism bubble that gives us all the insecurities, take a look at what men have to say about their experience. See if you can’t see through their eyes for a moment and shed a little tear.
15 Experienced women make boys tremble
“I don’t get insecure as much as I feel emasculated when a woman knows way more than I do in bed. Like when she just takes control, I just sit back like woah, I’ve been doing this wrong all along.”
Guys want to take charge apparently. And that goes for inside and outside the bedroom. Society has told men they must be Casanovas and whisk a woman off her feet in the boudoir. Sadly, that’s just not reality. There are many women who have more experience than men do and that’s got nothing to do with quantity, but more like quality. While men might be hoping around from bed to bed ignoring certain skills, women are likely to stick around and learn all the tricks of the trade. It makes total sense that a guy would feel nervous around such a sexually charged energy.
14 Baby got back, huh?
“My bum. It's huge. I'm a slim Asian dude but have the birthing hips of a middle-aged Hispanic woman.”
Who knew that men’s backsides made them feel shy? Women, too, have plenty of experience with bodacious booties and wide af birthing hips. While both seem to be all the rage right now, that will change with time –as do all things that come and go with the trends. But that doesn’t make it any less uncomfortable for some women. Having a body part that is noticeably larger or protruding can make people feel insecure. Men are no different. This confession can actually draw a bridge between men and women and, for once, we can see that we’re kinda alike. But not really. It’s just a trick of the eye, the booty has got us all hypnotized.
13 Who knew they were so obsessed with their chests?
“Won't go topless , might have moobs or beer belly.” “Same problem. I am sure i do not have a beer belly or moobs. I just think i could be more fit.” “Same. It's quite strange as I often get told I look fit with my clothes on but I don't feel it when I don't have a shirt on for example. Really weird.”
Ok, sure we know guys like boobs, but moobs are a whole different beast. When male models display pecks made for and by the gods, average men surely huddle in a corner wondering how it’s done. Guys –we get it! We’ve felt the same way when evaluating certain female’s anatomy. And while much of what we see has been photo shopped, that still doesn’t keep people from feeling a little uneasy by exposing their natural and humble bodies. Going shirtless doesn’t seem to be a problem on the beach, even for the biggest guy, but it seems like their holding back all their tears and putting their best chest forward.
12 Unique smiles a sensitive subject
“My gap tooth. Had surgery as a kid but it ended up not working and didn't correct anything. It sucks being self conscious about smiling at a girl.”
Seriously, the gap tooth? It can work for or against a person. And there are many who have taken that gap and ran with it. Plenty of celebrities and artists have embraced their gap tooth and become icons. The gap tooth, in case this guy didn’t know, is a sign of intelligence. So for those who shun away from such space between teeth, just know that they are clueless that they are face to face with a genius. Gap toothed peeps need not be like this guy, worried about smiling at a girl. But truth be told, his vulnerability makes us fall for him, gap tooth and all. His confession feels so genuine that it breaks a heart, or at the very least a tooth.
11 Extra cushion for the pushing
“I’ve gained a lot of weight since we got married and it makes me really insecure, I’m scared she won’t want to be intimate with me anymore until I lose some and start getting back in shape, even though she still says she loves me.”
Weight gain can breakdown a person’s sense of self. When weight gain contributes to low self-esteem and can lead to even further weight gain. Yep, we’ve heard this before. But who knew men were so insecure about this extra layer of fat? It seems like most men fault their extra lbs without much abandon. Some are even proud of their love handles and beer bellies. So hearing a husband doubt his wife’s ability to be attracted to him after weight gain is really comforting. It almost feels like men are human. Well, sometimes.
10 Thicky thick boys get zero love
“For a powerlifter, my body is pretty typical to the sport. Thick frame, big arms, bit of a gut, broad chest, solid legs.
Why this guy thinks his shape might be an issue is beyond me. Like the variety of female figures, the same theory can be applied to men’s bodies. Women don’t always want a tall, lanky dude or a chiseled, rock hard body. Some of those bodies don’t’ feel so god in bed. They aren’t cuddly. Like men who want women with a little meat on her bones, there are some women who totally stand behind this philosophy. Some might call them chubby chasers, but whatever you call them, don’t call them crazy. Women who are into larger men and vice versa prove the concept that the more of you to love is the way to go.
9 Body image issues aren’t just for women
“Easily my body image. I don’t want her thinking of that hot guy she saw at the gym earlier and wish I were him. I want her to be attracted to me, but I know I need to start getting my shit together and make her want me like she used to.”
Guys are not the only ones who struggle with body image and weight. While the majority of the pressure does fall on women, there’s plenty to befall men. Look at advertisements for boxer shorts, cologne, and razors. Men are just as susceptible to the pressures to look a certain way. Like women, men need to realize all shapes, sizes, and colors are cool with us. Variety is the spice of life and boy oh boy does it give it plenty of flavor.
8 Confidence rests on the shoulders
“My posture. I'm a slim guy about 6'2" and I always worry that I look like I'm slouching. Or that my lower back is too curved. I'm always having to tell myself, "head up, shoulders back" when I'm out and about. I think I'm getting better about it though.”
This confessions seems to be about posture, but in between the lines speaks something much louder. Here is a guy wh0’s lacking self-confidence. Sound familiar, ladies? That’s right. We’ve been there, too. And while we know guys can feel the same feels, it’s nice to actually have guys admit to this. It takes a brave man to confess to his vulnerability. Truth be told, that sort of talk is quite attractive. But yeah, bad posture, we get it. It’s not top on the list, but when someone walks with shoulders back and head held high it makes all the difference. Posture, ladies, posture. All about poise.
7 Facial hair not all there
“Where the hell is my beard? I'm in my mid-twenties, it should be here by now goddamnit!” “meanwhile some kids starting high school have majestic wizard beards...”
Now, more than ever before, facial hair has hit the fashion market as though it’s an accessory. And if the fashion world could sell fake beards for profit, they totally would. Men are growing beards left and right. They are growing them like they’re going out of style. And they are growing them bigger than life itself. For the gentleman who can’t quite get there or can’t even raise a little stubble, this must be a heartbreaker. However, as with most things, men need to remember that not all women are into the bearded look and that there are surely some females out there who prefer a smooth cheek to a scratchy 5 o’clock shadow. Not all trends are good, especially when they down play other’s and disqualify them from the discussion. Men with no beards –get out there and play. Don’t be shy and flaunt those baby smooth faces.
6 The imperfect smile can be more charming than he realizes
“I'll never forget one time this girl I met freshmen year in college...she was drunk for her first time and told me "you'd be cute, but with your teeth like that no girl will ever find you attractive". She was such a nice girl normally so I assume she honestly feels that way and the alcohol just revealed her thoughts.”
The confession of this guy is not only hard to hear, but hard to handle. How cruel humans can be to each other. In the smallest places charm can be found. And in many cases, a unique smile is the one that wins hearts over and over again. It’s not the smile that comes from braces that steals girl’s hearts away, but the genuine one, whether a little crooked or jagged. Surely, this moment left him with a little trauma and we can totally feel that. Hopefully, he used that imperfect smile to find a girl who could appreciate him for him and not focus solely on one aspect of his physicality.
5 No hair, but he totally cares
“I went bald in my early twenties - I look okay with a shaved head but I'm no Bruce Willis. Also when I'm over my ideal weight range I start to see a double chin which terrifies me back down to a healthier weight.”
When men start to bald, they lose it. Not just their hair, but their self-esteems. That’s why a large percentage of men walk around with a shaved head. They prefer to have it all gone than deal with that awkward patchiness. While some women are into balding guys, it’s the guy who’s not into it. With the wrong head shape and a little extra weight, the shaved head can make a guy look like something he’s totally not –a meat head. Women identify with this hair issue, but ours is related to those girls who grow hair quickly and not just any kind of hair, but that long, luscious, thick horse mane hair, the stuff hair dreams are made of. Guys might even know that we’re talking about here.
4 Is there such thing as a chest that’s too big
“But i have bad gynecomastia and I'm super self conscious of them. I always need to have under shirts to "flatten" my upper body. What sucks is that it's not fat, but there is actual breast tissue there, so losing fat won't cure my problem. I've only recently gotten enough confidence to be shirtless in public, but even then I'm on edge. I hate that surgery to remove them in well over 3k. Saving to have it done in the next three years.”
According to this guy, yes and so much yes. Men can also suffer from chests that have overgrown as a result of hormonal imbalances. Well, sometimes this can be the result of food or certain enhancing drugs or supplements. But for the guys with chests that are organically plump, this can feel like a nightmare. It’s no different for an extra busty women. However, that being said –there’s somebody out there who’s into that sort of thing. All sorts of fetishes make the world go round and round and round.
3 A little body hair is too much
“Body hair. Taking care of it all takes a lot of time, so normally I don't bother. If sexy times are a possibility, I spend 2 hours taking care of it all.”
The idea that a man could be equally as shy about his body hair as a women gives us all the goosebumps. But not too many that it makes our hairs grow back. Guys are not just shy about body hair, they also dislike the whole shaving routine as much as we do. At least, that’s what this guy seems to be telling us. It’s refreshing to know that shaving can be the bane of their existence, too. Knowing that this guy is secretly hating not just his body hair, but the entire process to remove it gives us hope that men can be sensitive creatures after all.
2 Height becomes a distraction more than attraction
“To be honest, I think it might be a height thing. I'm 6'7" and have a 6'10" wingspan and I have never had good arms, they look kind of... unimpressive. It doesn't matter that I could bench and curl more than anyone I worked out with, my arms just never got "huge". I have the same problem with my calves. I think it just might be due to my limbs being so long that it is hard to get bulgy, ripped muscles. I dunno, man.”
Whereas women worry about having flappy or chunky arms, this guy is worried about his thin arms. Guys do tend to pride themselves on their arm muscles, some even asking about gun shows and showing off with bicep kissing. The bulk of a man’s arm gives him a sense of pride, but not this guy. He’s feeling underwhelmed by his unimpressive arms. The fact that they seem to refuse to amass muscle or get toned probably makes him feel both confused and frustrated. Ladies, tell me we don’t know how it feels to work on a problem area only to see it expand or shrink before our very eyes. We sympathize with this long limbed dude, we really do.
1 But what about the nerdy guys
“Not tall enough (5'8), overweight (155), acne (my skin in general isn't great, but getting better), braces (self explanatory). High school kids definitely aren't shy when it comes to pointing out what I already think about myself. Starting tomorrow these insecurities get exponentially worse.”
Whoever hasn’t been the awkward kid in school doesn’t know how this guy is feeling. This is the frog to prince story, the one every nerdy guy fantasizes about, the one they pray for. It can’t be easy to have some physical traits stacked against him, but in due time, this guy will discover that what were once weaknesses transformed into areas of strengths. The nerdy develops character, he’s funny, he’s sweet, and sometimes he’s sarcastic. Those traits matter to some girls. So while he might be short and have trouble skin, the future is a blank canvas. Only time will reveal what’s beneath those transformative years. Patience is the key. And we hope he can turn those flaws into flowers with which to present to a nice girl who will respect him for him.