Everyone deserves a bit of indulgence sometimes. Whether that means eating an extra large chocolate bar or sleeping in until noon on a workday (after calling in sick), humans by nature crave pleasure. That pleasure can come in many forms, depending on who you are. You could have materialistic pleasures, you could be fueled by pleasures of the food variety or you could even get pleasure from some traditionally strange things. Freud would even go as far as saying that all human beings are motivated and controlled by one thing: nookie, which could be considered the greatest pleasure of all. Maslow goes a little bit further and says that we become fulfilled and “self actualized” after adhering to basic human needs. Whatever your beliefs are about what it takes to feel “complete” or live a life of pleasure, here are some guilty pleasures all women definitely have.
15 Sunbathing (Sans Bathing Suit)
The sun provides a large supply of Vitamin D, which contributes to your happiness. There are many songs about sunshine and studies show that those who don’t get enough sun often are chronically tired and unhappy. Women love to sunbathe; on patios, on beaches, on their balconies or even on their front lawns. And let’s be real, no one likes those dreaded tan lines so this sunbathing is often done in the buff. You probably don’t even care that your neighbor “might” be able to see if he looks out his window hard enough… Keep catching those rays! The only exception to this rule is if you live somewhere, like the arctic, where sunbathing isn’t an option 6 months of the year.
14 Watching Reality TV
Pick your poison. There are many of them. You could be a fan of The Bachelor and be secretly singing, “Someday my Prince will Come” on the inside; or maybe you’re a fan of My 600lb Life (while trying desperately to make yourself eat a salad instead of the pizza you want to order); or maybe you just like to keep up with the Kardashians to remind yourself that fame isn’t all it’s cracked up to be and maybe your life isn’t so bad after all. Whatever your guilty binge watching show, you watch it for a reason and that is sure to keep you coming back for more… at least until the newest hot reality show hits cable.
13 Sleeping In
You work work work from 9-5 every day and then you do your regular adult things, like going to the gym, grocery shopping, calling your mother, the list goes on… But you also know that you have to clean the house on the weekend, and that it’s beautiful out, so you should probably get outside and actually not waste away your weekend… Yet it’s 11:30a.m. on Saturday and you have no desire to drag your butt outta bed. Sleep is good for your health and your mood and it just makes you feel so refreshed when you FINALLY get up, so go ahead and keep indulging in this guilty pleasure.
12 YouTubing To Feel Better
Everyone has moments of weakness. Daily stresses, terrible days, fights with your friends, coworkers or significant others can contribute to making you feel like your head is going to explode. And it’s normal to watch YouTube videos for several reasons. One, to make you feel like you’re not alone in your feelings of being overwhelmed and two, to make you feel like it’s not that bad compared to other people. You’ve most certainly watched at least one Bridezilla video and searched for “people freaking out” when you’re stressed. YouTube provides it’s own type of therapy, making it extremely popular to the masses.
11 Watching Adult Programming
Many of you might be in denial about this one… and that’s okay… everyone knows that most dudes indulge in adult vids probably close to once a day, while doing other extra-curricular activities… But this type of entertainment is popular with ladies and men alike. Go to any of the popular streaming sites and instead of traditional intense categories, you’ll see many additions like “romantic” and “female friendly.” Ladies have called and service providers have answered by providing literal pleasure to it’s female viewership.
10 Dancing Like No One Is Watching
Similarly to singing to your shower head (your shower head thinks you’re a superstar, btw), dancing like no one is watching, is something all women do. Some of you do it when you’re alone and listening to music or maybe making dinner, and some of you just give it all you’ve got whether you’re out with your girlfriends or at a family wedding. Need a reminder about how amazing this is: just go check out that scene in Easy A, where Emma Stone dances and sings to “Pocket Full of Sunshine”, and go turn on your jam, whatever it is!
9 Taking Too Many Selfies
You may think those girls who’s Instagram pages are just littered in selfies are awful. And you’re not wrong. People who put selfies upon selfies upon selfies out there are portraying a very particular image to the public. But whether or not you post the occasional one, or just take a million of them on your phone when you’re having a good hair day (or your make up is on point), the evidence is very apparent in your mobile photo album. When you look good, you feel good so keep on snapping because this is one guilty pleasure that’s here to stay.
8 Not Following Diets
You made another lose weight resolution this year didn’t you? And you’re probably doing really well. You went out for girls night last week and had a salad (with your bottle of wine)… You even went to the health food store and bought some high protein supplements to help you out. Know what feels great though? When you throw that soggy salad in the trash and eat a burger instead. You’re alone and no one has to know. So go on and join the many women who secretly cheat on their diets (on more than just cheat day) and indulge in some definite food pleasure.
7 Popping Pimples
It’s gross. You secretly hate it. But it feels kinda good in a weird way when you do. Nothing is worse than a big, fat, obvious pimple smack dab on your forehead or nose. You may have noticed it has a whitehead on it. Go ahead and pop it, but do it gently so it doesn’t scar. You even really like the grossness of seeing what comes out of it. It’s a guilty pleasure but it’s all in the name of keeping your skin healthy and looking great so keep on poppin’.
6 Shameless Flirting
It’s no secret that flirting is fun. Women have been using sexuality to manipulate men for years. And you certainly earned it, being oppressed for years. Even if you aren’t flirting to get something out of the other person, it’s still really nice to bat your eyelashes and get attention, isn’t it? You flirt with everyone from your bank teller, to the guy at the gas station and probably even your coworkers. It feels freaking awesome! And flirting isn’t technically cheating on your boyfriend at home, so as long as it stays harmless… nothing to feel guilty about.
5 Hoarding Clothes
You’ve done several closet cleaning sessions to clean house and do the “out with the old, in with the new” thing. But you can’t bear to part with your prom dress. It’s beautiful, it’s your favorite color and it brings back so many amazing memories but there’s only one problem. It’s never going to fit again. It’s not because you’re “fat”, it’s because you’ve grown, your rib cage and hips have expanded and you’re also 2 inches taller. Maybe you still try to squeeze into it because you’re determined, but the only thing that’s going to do is rip the darn thing. It’s okay to keep it and be nostalgic, but not if it means you can’t fit any new clothes in your closet.
Fantasy is a guilty pleasure no matter who you are. Some fantasize about being rich and famous; some fantasize about their dream job or being a superhero; and some dream about being shacked up with Ryan Gosling. No matter the status of your life, job or relationship, all women fantasize. Besides, sex therapists say that no matter how good the sex is with your partner, half the struggle of achieving orgasm is in your mind, so it’s okay if you’re getting there with your partner when you might not be thinking about your partner.
It doesn’t matter what you’re complaining about: work, cramps, or your friends constantly bailing on you, but you love a good complaining sesh. People complain because it feels familiar, and is therefore a comforting feeling. You also crave the validation in having someone agree with something you are complaining about. It feels good when people agree with you instead of fighting with you so it’s almost become a feel-good habit. Tread lightly, ladies, because the more you use your creative juices to focus on the complaining, the more you could attract more negativity.
2 Facebook Creeping
Throughout your life, you will meet, befriend and possibly un-friend countless people. They will be childhood friends, high school sweethearts or random people you meet and hang out with every day for a very short period of time. Creeping your ex on social media is totally normal and acceptable and you secretly love it when you see that your ex is unhappy or your old frenemies got fat. It feels good when you compare yourself to someone else and “win” that imaginary battle.
1 Reading Unrealistic (And Sort Of Awful) Fantasy Novels
So you’re twenty-five, with a decent job, your own place and a pretty awesome boyfriend who you adore… and you still “get off” on reading Twilight. That love triangle is pretty intense, isn’t it? But sparkly vampires, come on! Many women read either poorly written works (see: Fifty Shades of Grey) or books written for a MUCH younger audience (Goosebumps, The Maze Runner, The Divergent: Series). But, maybe you HAVE to read them, since movie versions are coming out, right? You certainly don’t have to justify your reading choices to anyone. Reading is considered a pleasurable activity to most, so you might as well get as much pleasure as you can by reading whatever your heart desires.
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