15 Differences Between A Friend And BFFL

We all know the joke, “A friend will bail you out of jail, but a best friend will be the one sitting next to you in the cell.” So it goes with a bffl. She’s not only the one you call to go out for drinks, hit the shops, or gossip about guys, but she’s also the one by your side through the good, the bad, the heartache, and the ugly. She’s your one and only, irreplaceable bestie, and the feeling's mutual. You don’t have to discuss your relationship, but you often can’t help express how much you love each other – and sometimes that makes others roll their eyes in blatant jealousy. P.D.A. has gone on for years, and if you guys have had to separate for jobs or college, your new home always has its door open for her.

You share almost everything (except for guys), families, clothing, inside jokes, even finances. If Mr. Right never comes around, you might consider getting hitched just due to the practical logistics of it all. And you’ve talked about it before. You go above and beyond not because you’re trying to be a best friend, but because you genuinely want her to be happy. You’re constantly laughing and joking around in each others presence, and you show other people how to have a good time by lifting the mood. Yet, you don’t sugar coat the truth for each other. Tough love runs through your relationship, and you’re always entitled to the last word.

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15 She’s your soul mate

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Guys will come and go of course, but your one true soul mate is your best friend. You make jokes about marrying each other if your Mr. Right never comes around – and to be honest the deal doesn’t sound so bad. You finish each other's sentences and eat the food off each other's plates. You hold her hair back when she’s had too much to drink, you wipe the tears from her eyes when she’s crying and set out to show the guy who broke her heart a proper lesson. When you go on vacation you often feel like you're honeymooning together. You sleep in the same bed and know each other like the back of your own hand. You can sit together in silence like an old couple reading the newspaper, but you also enjoy getting fancy and taking each other out to a nice dinner to celebrate (special occasion or not).

14 You know her information by heart

Phone number, email, childhood address, apartment building, you name it – you know her details by heart. Typically, it’s so easy to recall because you went through your childhood, college and tumultuous adult years together, side by side. She knows the name of your first crush and you know the age she first got her period. In case of an emergency, she’s the first person that will be called, maybe even before your parents and immediate family. When someone asks you a question about yourself that you can’t remember, such as your high school mascot or astrological sign, all you need to do is look at her and she’ll answer the question for you. You don’t understand “best friendships” where the friends don’t know each other's phone numbers by heart – and you couldn’t forget each other's information if you tried. It’s a fact of your best friendship that binds you two together forever.

13 You have the last word

When it comes to the most important matters of life, such as instances revolving guys, outfits, apartments, and other big life decisions, you give each other the final say. If she doesn’t like him, there’s a huge problem and roadblock in the way of any prospective relationship – unless of course, he wins her over. More so than your parents or your most esteemed mentor, your best friend truly knows what’s best for you. You know she will be the one by your side when you shop for your wedding dress, and she’s the first person you talk to when deciding whether to quit or take a job offer. You might even consider calling her before you agree to marry someone, to commit to an apartment, a car, or pretty much anything under the sun. You’ll often trust her advice more than your own, and the same goes on the other side.

12 You talk daily

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Whether it’s a seemingly meaningless emoji, a dinner, bottle of wine and Netflix date, or an hour long Skype call, you make sure to keep each other updated on the daily. You won’t be put off by a questioning “hello?” if you haven’t talked all day because you will notice too. You’ll immediately apologize and let her know how crazy busy you were or otherwise explain why it took you so long to answer. Whether you’re in the middle of work, combing your hair, scrolling through Instagram, whatever it may be, you’ll always stop what you’re doing to answer a call from her. A call can be serious, and although it will probably be just to gossip, say hey, or distract herself doing work, you’ll pick it up given you’re not in a board meeting with your entire company. And even in that case, there’s a chance you may slip out and take the call.

11 Distance won’t break your friendship

When you two need to part for any particular reason, college, jobs, and other commitments, there’s no question you stay best friends. Although you may meet other friends, sorority sisters, roommates, and colleagues, it won’t diminish the value of your best friendship. Everyone at your new home will know her as your best friend because you talk daily and speak about each other all the time. Your memories and bond are unforgettable and transcend the boundaries of physical limitations. When you live in different cities, you deal with it by visiting each other often and making a point to schedule times to talk regularly. Her new place will become something like your second home away from home. Just like a long distance relationship, a best friendship can be tested by how it manages time apart. When you reunite, your friendship will be just the same, if not better than it was before.

10 You share families and homes

“Her house is your house” is a given. You feel completely comfortable walking into her house unannounced, giving every member of her family a hug and petting the house pet as it greets you with a warm hello. Her childhood home was your second house, or has become like one over the years, as you visit each other's parents and join major family reunions and holiday celebrations throughout the years. People are always asking where the other is if they are absent from thanksgiving dinner or Christmas eve. One of you may have been jealous either now or in the past of a sibling of yours that got too close with your bffl. You know each other's neighbors and have the key to each others apartment. You help around the house in exchange for your indefinite stays, and you enjoy spending quality time around the dinner table, laughing and often poking fun like you were in your own house.

9 Tough love is your mantra

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Of course, you fill each other up with compliments and you’re always bragging about each other, but still, you keep each other in check when you need. If you see anything as small as her greasy hair before a big date, or as big as her irrationality in a romantic relationship, you’ll tell her off the bat. Your tough love has no sugar coating and is taken very seriously. You don’t insult each other just for the hell of it, so when you confront each other you know that it’s serious. She’s often the one who will scold you when you yell at your parents for no reason, and who will tell you you’re acting out of line when you call your boyfriend 10 times when he's on a night out with his friends. You tell each other the hard truth when no one else has the guts to do so, and that’s part of the reason you two stay so close.

8 People ask if you’re sisters

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Even if you look nothing alike, people will ask if you two are related. It’s just the way you act like you’ve known each other since you popped out of the womb, that gives off the impression of a biological match. Often times, like how people start to look like their dogs, you’ll begin to resemble each other. You may wear similar clothing and have similar habits such as playing with the back piece of your hair or biting your nails. For some reason, bffls tend to look a lot like each other, with similar characteristics and body types. Other times, the physical resemblance will be minor, but the similarity in attitude and mannerisms will be uncanny. Like twin sisters from “The Parent Trap,” you’ll finish each other's sentences and often be mistaken for one another. You can easily take her phone and pretend to be her as a joke or to cover her on an important call.

7 Inside jokes are countless

You could sit in a room with white walls and no sound and laugh until you put yourselves to sleep. Others may feel uncomfortable or annoyed hanging out with you two because of your endless inside jokes. Sometimes, you try to hold back out of courtesy but you often just can’t help it. Most things remind you two of a funny time together – a lot of those “you had to be there” moments happen when you are around each other. If you two were in high school together, you definitely reserved a page on the back of each others yearbook for all of your insiders. You have your own language whether verbal or physical, and just its existence cracks you up. When one of you has a birthday, you’re sure to post an Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook post, Tweet, on every other social platform out there, with a long, cheesy quote that no one will fully understand besides your bestie.

6 Others are jealous of your friendship

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Although they may not say it outright, you see the jealously in people’s eyes when they look at your best friendship. You will often get the comments over and over, “Are you guys always attached at the hip?” or “You two are ridiculous.” You are not afraid of public displays of affection, and sometimes that can cause resentment from others. But you feel so happy around your bffl and seriously feel sorry for other people who haven’t found that special someone. You are not phased when other girls are petty towards you two, it’s because they feel excluded by your unbreakable bond. When people get to know you guys, however, they will still feel jealous, but you’ll win them over and they’ll just accept the fact that you are attached at the hip. And in your opinion, two of you is better than one. Take it or leave it, people!

5 You’re possessive A.F.

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Just like an overbearing mother or jealous boyfriend, you can be possessive A.F. with your bffl. If you go to college separately, you’ll still always have tabs on your bffls new friends and almost every other aspect of her life. When a new guy comes into the picture, things can get a bit tense, until you remember again that relationships with guys are fleeting and you’ll never ditch each other for another relationship. Still, you sometimes sense a bit of that possessive flair in your relationship, which is only normal as you too are so close. For this reason, you’ll always reassure each other by keeping your daily and weekly rituals in place, never ditching for new friends or guys because your bffl always has an open invite to the party – even if that means she’s a third wheel. Sometimes you don’t want to share each other, especially when you have reservations over whether the other person is worth her time.

4 You joke around regularly

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You’re not afraid to joke around with each other in public and make jabs at each other when the time is right. You find a perfect balance of staying light and never crossing the line. A friend or simple best friend will often overstep their boundaries and push a joke too far, but a bffl knows you so well that it will never happen. You’re sometimes known for making fun of each other in public, to the point that it may surprise other people who look at you confused when you’re arm in arm laughing a few minutes later. You would never intentionally sabotage one another, and you’re aware that all is in good fun. Prank streaks aren’t uncommon with you guys, April Fools' or not. You may call her on restricted pretending to be someone else, change her Tinder profile bio when she least expects it and do other harmless acts of love.

3 There’s no question it’s forever

Best friend forever means for eternity, no if ands or buts. Just like having a sister, there’s no falling out that will end the friendship. In fact, because you both know this, you tend to work things out immediately and act like you’re in it for the long haul. Unlike a relationship or marriage, your vows are unwritten and don’t need to be explicitly stated out loud. Your honor system is strictly between you two, and your trust extends for years, to the depths of your being. You’d quite seriously lose a leg for each other, and step outside of your comfort zone, doing almost anything on behalf of your bffl. When you’re happy, sad, lonely, afraid, excited, emotional, whatever it may be, she’s the first person you run to, and she feels the same about you. When someone breaks your heart, she’s there to mend it. Happy ever after is a given.

2 You’re never bored

It is never a dull moment when you and your bffl are together. Not only are you constantly making each other laugh over seemingly random things and endless inside jokes, but you two are always trying new things and meeting new people. You probably have a list of restaurants, bars, cities, countries, workout studios, etc. to try out together. Really anything! Just like an old married couple, you know that a good relationship is one in which you try your best to keep things interesting. You surprise each other when you are least expecting it – not only with funny pranks but also cute little presents and tickets to your favorite events. Whether you are going to an underground comedy show, taking a spontaneous weekend vacation to the beach, getting a couple’s massage or trying out the new Indonesian restaurant across town, you keep the fire of your relationship burning.

1 You bring out the best in each other

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Best friends don’t hold each other down but encourage one another to become better. Whether it’s forcing them out of their comfort zone to take a yoga class with you, or to approach the guy they’ve been raving about for weeks, you enhance each other's lives. Friends often will be jealous of one another, pulling each other down to make themselves feel better. A best friend won’t tell you to skip out on an important work event or ditch a guy that’s great for you just because she needs a buddy to hang out with. A bffl always has your best interest in mind first, and then her own. You two make each other better, you energize each other, spark interests in things you never knew you had, and take spontaneous adventures together whether across the world or to a new restaurant down the street. Your relationship is exciting and fresh because you’re constantly learning new things together.

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