Whether you’re looking to prevent fine lines or trying to rid wrinkles that have already formed, an anti-aging regimen is probably in your daily beauty routine. Women are constantly trying to look younger, to get that plump skin they used to have back when they were eighteen. And while some ladies take the more logical approach by purchasing expensive anti-aging moisturizers to slather on at night, others reach for more drastic methods that can sometimes be downright ridiculous. Celebrities especially have been noted for using some pretty unique tactics to keep that youthful glow, which can involve anything from ice water facials to spraying skin with milk. But those are only the start of the long list of bogus beauty regimens celebrities and everyday women use. Here are 15 insane things women try in order to look young.
15 The No!No! FaceTrainer
You work out your thighs when you want to tone and shape, so why wouldn’t you do the same for your face? After all, toned thighs equal healthy and young-looking thighs. Wouldn’t a toned face offer the same? Well, apparently the maker of the The No!No! FaceTrainer thinks so (and so do the women who try it). Here’s how it works: you put the weighted mask on and perform a variety of facial expressions for about 10 minutes. The resistance of the heavy mask is said to help tone the face which, eventually leads to less wrinkles and more firmness. Too bad you look like a serial killer wearing it.
14 Placenta Face Masks
Ladies, if you have some left over placenta lying around from your last child birth, you might want to smear it over your face. Gross right? Well, not everyone thinks so or at least aren't too disgusted to try it. Some dermatologists actually offer placenta facials in their office. The facials usually consist of sterilized powder from placentas (either from human or animal) and are applied to the skin after an exfoliation treatment. The benefits? Apparently, it’s supposed to make your skin feel smooth, soft, and wrinkle-free, kind of like a newborn. Fitting, isn’t it?
13 Bee Venom Treatment
Remember when you were a kid and were afraid of bees? You know, because they sting and hurt like hell when they do. Well, fast forward to your adult life and now you’re willing to welcome the sting by applying the bee venom on your skin. What? Okay, maybe you’re not, but celebrities are certainly into it. Victoria Beckham is said to be a big fan of spreading bee venom on her skin to keep it looking extra posh. The venom is supposed to reduce fine lines simply by plumping the skin’s collagen, sort of like coating your skin with that prickly lipgloss that’s supposed to make your lips ten times bigger. Ouch.
12 Kitty Litter Scrub
We’ve all heard about rubbing used coffee grinds on our thighs to help rid the appearance of cellulite, but kitty litter? Well, Christie Brinkley swears by it (or so they say), and uses it to scrub away the dead skin cells to provide more youthful looking, cellulite-free legs. Look, for an actress in her sixties (jaw drop now) that looks like she's maybe in her thirties, we’re happy to follow her beauty lead. But rubbing Mr. Fluffy’s Tidy Cats on our legs sort of feels a little too freakishly feline for our liking.
11 Vitamin IV Drips
If you’re willing to fork over a wad of cash to look younger, then chances are you’ve probably tried a vitamin IV drip. These expensive drips can be found in some of the most elite spas around the nation, and can include a variety of vitamins to stab into your vein, like B12 complex and vitamin C. It takes about 45 minutes to complete (you’ll be able to catch up on your Facebook stalking), and is supposed to give you a burst of energy afterward, while also providing the vital nutrients to help make your skin more youthful looking. Clearly taking your vitamins by mouth for about $3 is so last year.
10 Vampire Facelift
Vampire? Facelift? Yikes. The name alone is kind of scary but the procedure sounds a little sinister, too. However, there is good news. It’s not an actual facelift (phew) since there’s no going under any knife, but there is plenty of the red stuff (not so great if you’re squeamish about blood). Once your blood is drawn, the “purified” plasma from your own fluids will then be injected back into your skin to provide a more fresh, youthful look. Just call you Mina Harker (ahem, Dracula’s dead wife).
9 Ceramic Crystal Therapy
Seriously, do ceramic crystals really sound like they are supposed to go into your skin? We don’t think so either, but still, some people believe that by injecting these bits into your face, the skin will appear much younger. The problem is it’s not the fountain of youth and doesn’t stop your body from changing. So while its particles stay the same, your body doesn’t, which means the two won’t always match up and the particles can be more noticeable overtime. Of course, there’s also the chance that your body won’t want those crazy crystals inside it and reject them before they even get a chance to do their magic.
8 Leech Therapy
We’ve been hearing a lot about leeches lately, especially if you watch Botched or Real Housewives of Orange County. Heather Dubrow has no problem sticking one of these slimy creatures to her stomach to reach the benefits of tighter, younger looking skin, but it was kind of nasty to watch. Sure, leech therapy is supposed to help purify and revitalize, but do you really want to have these things sucking on you? If you’re still on the fence, watch the rerun of Heather’s bloody tummy (she ruined an outfit with that leakage, by the way) and you’ll pick a side in no time.
7 Bird-Feces Facial
So you’re driving along the road one day and out of nowhere a bird dropping splatters on your car window. Yuck. You don’t want bird poop on your car (even if it is said to be good luck), so why would you ever want it on your face? Well, allegedly the doo-doo is jammed packed with substances that can help the aging process and provide more elasticity to the skin for a younger looking you. The good thing is the bird poop used in this particular treatment is dried and sterilized so it’s not wet and sloppy like you see on your car. The bad news? It’s bird poop on your face. Just saying.
6 Smelling Grapefruit
Want to instantly appear younger without applying anything to your face? Well, the next time you’re at a farmers market, pick up a grapefruit and take a good whiff. You, yourself might not see a change when you look in the mirror, but the surrounding men will see something different. Apparently men are said to think women appear younger after smelling pink grapefruit - six years younger to be exact - says Chicago’s Smell & Taste Treatment and Research Foundation. So while you might not be able to see any real results with this, it is a quick fix to appear younger to the opposite sex. Just remember to buy a case load of grapefruit - you need to retain the image.
5 Snail Facial
Back in the day, it was said that workers who came into contact with snails actually saw a difference in their hands after touching the slimy critters. The skin was softer and smoother, while all cuts healed faster with much less noticeable scarring. So why not smother snail secretions on your face to help make it softer and line-free, too? Um, because it’s snail goo! But regardless, this very gunk has been used in many cosmetic treatments to help make fine lines and wrinkles less noticeable on the face. Now, if only you can look past the fact you’re using snail slime in your beauty regimen.
4 'Male Swimmers' Facial
This kind of facial takes the term “money shot” to another level. Okay, sure Heather Locklear has been known to use spermine to help keep your youthful glow - and what a glow it is - but seriously? Sperm? On your face? Okay, it’s not necessarily what you think. This isn’t some kinky thing you do in the privacy of your own home. Instead, you hightail it to a fancy spa and pay them to do it for you. They will rub in on your face (yes, rub not eject) and explain how the anti-oxidants in these swimmers are supposed to help make your crows feet less noticeable.
3 SpaceSleeper Pillow
Many women believe that the way you sleep can really damage your skin. Some have invested in satin pillows to prevent wrinkles, while others have tried the SpaceSleeper Pillow. This pillow keeps your head in one position so your face can't move and get smushed on the bed - causing your skin to crinkle like a sheet. If you don’t move around in your sleep and want to wake up with a crick in the neck, then sure this might work. But if you’re a restless sleeper (like most of us) and don’t want to feel constricted like you’re in a medieval torture chamber device, this pillow might not be the best option.
2 Hemorrhoid Cream For Wrinkles
Ah, the power of over-the-counter hemorrhoid cream. Not only will it tighten your blood vessels in your behind, but it will constrict the muscles in your face, too. While it’s marketed for minimizing swelling where the sun don’t shine, actors and celebrities have been using this anti-aging method for years to help make their skin appear its best. And who doesn’t like a method that can rid two problems with one cream? Now, you don’t have to be embarrassed buying it at the store. When someone gives you the eye, just tell them it’s for your face. Surely, that will put their mind at ease.
1 Red Wine Bath Soak
For so long we have given ourselves a valid excuse to indulge in wine - it’s good for the heart after all! And now, just when we thought our love for the grapes couldn't grow more intense, it can. Or so say celebrities like Terri Hatcher. She apparently uses red wine in her bathtub - and not just to sip on. She soaks in it to help keep her skin soft and youthful. Is she just a lush? Maybe, but we’re not judging. If there's a chance that soaking in red wine helps prevent fine lines and wrinkles, then this is a beauty routine we’re happy to try. With a glass of wine of course.