Spending time with someone you love is a beautiful thing. You can grow closer, get to know them on a deeper level, and admire their skills and sense of humour. But some things... some things will tear you apart. The list below comprises a list of things that are better spent doing with friends, family, or alone - especially if the relationship is already fragile. Some of these things have been known to tip couples over the edge on the spot, or effect your life negatively further down the road. Either way, make sure to scratch these off the list of great date ideas... immediately.
14 Make fun of one another
[caption id="attachment_29779" align="alignnone" width="1920"] via:www.youtube.com[/caption]
Poking fun is one thing... but blatantly and intentionally making fun of the other person with the intention of hurting them is wrong. You really should not do this to anyone, but relationships are certainly the most fragile for this type of behaviour. Nagging can also fall into this category. Anything where you want to make the other person feel like they are doing something wrong in any other way than a civilized adult conversation using the words "I feel" should be avoided if you want to stay away from being on the other side of resentment.
13 Go to the bathroom
When you leave the bathroom door open you might as well be doing it together. Yes, some couples will pee in front of each other after a long enough period of comfort, but that should be about where it stops. Keep a little mystery in the romance and continue to do some of the private things privately.
12 Get tattoos
[caption id="attachment_29778" align="alignnone" width="800"] via:elitedaily.com[/caption]
This may seem like the perfect way to express your eternal love... since... you know... it is more or less eternal (aside from the extremely painful removal process that only works on certain colours). BUT IT IS NOT. What happens if you break up? Yes, yes. You love each other, you will never break up. But... just... what if. Welcome to the awkward dates explaining why your ex's name is on your arm and not trying to come off like a crazy person.
11 Work together
[caption id="attachment_29775" align="alignnone" width="980"] via:www.redbookmag.com[/caption]
You need time apart. If you work in the same office, take the same ride home, live in the same house (or even if you just spend a lot of time at the other person's house), and then sleep in the same bed... you are bound to get sick of each other. Meet the person at work? If one person can't or doesn't want to switch jobs, make a conscious effort to spend time apart at the office. Go for lunch with different people, only stop in to say hi once, and go out for drinks after work separately. Make sure your time together does not take up your whole life every day.
10 Build Ikea furniture
[caption id="attachment_29772" align="alignnone" width="1197"] via:popsugar.com[/caption]
The true test of a relationship... best not to be tested. Ikea has so many small moving parts and, even with instructions, seems to have a lot of opportunity for conflicting ways of doing things. Arguments are sure to break out and for some reason they always lead to the two dangerous words - 'always', and 'never'. "You never let me try", "you always try to control everything", "you aways treat me like I'm useless." Let's just say things can be said, relationships can be ended, and ikea furniture can sit half-done for years.
9 Have a baby to fix things
Do. Not. Do. It... EVER. If things are rocky and you have been together for a significant amount of time, don't just assume that having a baby will keep you together. Babies can sense when things are not right and bringing one into an unstable relationship is the worst possible start. Especially if both are not on board. Sit down and talk about your problems. If you need to break up, do it. Don't just hold on because you don't want to start over. If you want to keep trying, try to be happy together as a couple without any extra pressures, like a baby.
8 Wallpaper a room
One bubble and the whole thing comes tumbling down. Your relationship that is, not the wallpaper. Oh no, the wallpaper will be stuck like that forever with a bubble and crease as a constant reminder of mistakes made. Not to mention that 1mm off in a pattern can turn into one huge eyesore. When putting up wallpaper it is best to do it with a professional or at least not to do it with a significant other. It is hard work, it is sticky, and there are too many opportunities for error. Even the most forgiving couple may let a "if you had done what I said it would have been smooth," leading to a "enjoy staring a this wallpaper alone for the rest of your life." At $40 a roll.. it may just be best to hire out and have someone else to blame.
7 Talk in baby voices
Sorry schnookums, but nobody likes cutesy names or baby voices. Especially in public! It could quite possibly be the most annoying thing a couple can do (right up there with constantly kissing in public). And what if the other person is not as on board as you are? You are just asking for a turn-off. You are their girlfriend, not their adorable niece or future child - act like it. Having a private nickname for each other is fine if you both agree, but leave the baby voices... well... nowhere. Leave them nowhere and move on.
6 Not talk at all
Never keep it bottled up. As part of a couple in an adult relationship you have to be comfortable telling the other person how you feel. It may feel uncomfortable at the time but will save you from a blow-out down the road. If something is bothering you, tell them. Use words like "I feel" instead of "you do". This way you are not placing blame, you are simply telling them that you feel hurt when they say or do specific things - things he may not have known he was even doing.
5 Be inseparable
It's cute and all that you want to spend every waking minute with each other... but sometimes a girls night is in order. Don't let your friends fall by the wayside because you can't go anywhere without him. Sure, your friends like him and are happy to have him tag along sometimes... but they are YOUR friends and probably want to see you without him, at the very least just to check up on you. Also, what ever happened to that strong independent woman you used to be? Keep being her. He will love it.
4 Play risk or monopoly
Relationship ender number 2. Long drawn out games with a lot of strategy and investment are generally bad to play with someone you love. Why? Because winning them feels so good and losing feels so terribly bad. You don't want your significant other to ever feel bad when playing with you. Shorter games are fine because you both didn't invest an entire night into beating each other. Even Catan is on the edge because somehow card trades turn into real life bartering every time.
3 Play the 'how sure are you' game
[caption id="attachment_18499" align="alignnone" width="825"] bigstockphoto.com[/caption]
This game was recently invented in the Netflix original 'Master of None.' In it, Aziz asked his girlfriend how sure she was about wanting to be with him for the rest of her life. They both wrote a percentage down on a paper. Here is why this is a horrible idea. Because 1) If you are asking that question it is unlikely that you are both thinking 100% (and because 100% is pretty much a lie since no one is 100% sure about anything). 2) You are going to have different answers most likely so one person may feel worse off afterwards knowing they are more sure than the other. 3) Feelings cannot be summed up in a percentage and a full conversation is better to be had.
2 Write a pros and cons list
These are great. They really help you to get your feelings and actions all down in a clear concise list that is easy to compare. The problem arises when you do it together. Yes, you should both come up with lists for things if you need grounds to talk things over, but sit in different rooms. If you are across from each other you are less likely to be honest with yourself and the other person.
1 Read '50 Shades of Grey'
There are just better books to read if you want to spice things up. Books that don't have consent and abuse issues. Sure, the book is entertaining but it really doesn't seem like one that you read together to get things ticking again. Try another fantasy novel, or even a movie.
