Enough time has passed, wounds are beginning to heal, and hearts are being mended. We are summoning our inner strength and realizing that it can help to talk about it, so we do, but cautiously at first, careful not to destroy all the progress we’ve made. Day by day we can start to pick up the pieces and find a way to carry on with life. I am, of course, referring to the Adele ticket fiasco. I was one of the many excited fans looking forward to her North American tour for her latest album, 25. My sisters and I had it all set; we’d make a weekend trip out of it. Fly from California to New York, catch her show, take in the sights…it was going to be amazing. I had just moved back from Europe, my younger sister would be on summer vacation from Berkeley, and my older sister would meet us in the Big Apple. We were unstoppable. We were also broke, but would put everything on a credit card and have six months to come up with travel funds. That was the extent of our dedication, no time to get bogged down in the details, we’d make it work, for Adele. Now in the aftermath, I have discovered there are many like us. Plans crushed, dreams shattered. Together we will find a way to move forward, but in the meantime, here are the 13 thoughts we all had while trying to get our hands on Adele tickets.
13 I’ll Just Be Online When Sales Start
Perfect. Sales start at 10am in New York, which means 7am in California. I’ve got 3 alarms set and someone to text and then call if I don’t respond, just to make sure I’m awake. I’ll just get up, make myself a cup of coffee and jump online, ready and waiting. The Ticketmaster site is up and functioning so all I need to do is hit refresh and I’m in. Because this isn’t amateur hour, I'm on a desktop in case something goes haywire with the wireless connection and my laptop is up and on standby as a safety precaution. I’ve done a dry run and am ready for the real thing. Let’s do this.
12 45 Minute Wait Time? At Least I’m In…
That wasn’t so bad. Everything went as planned, I was on right as tickets went on sale, made sure to get the correct city and day and have the laptop searching for seats as well. Now I’ll just sit back and wait it out. It’s thinking, so I’m obviously in, I just wonder what row my seats will be in. I mean, I was on here right at opening, so maybe I’ll even get ground seats! It’s playing with my emotions though, going from 38 minutes back up to 45 then to 24…I don’t want to miss anything so I won’t lay back down, I’m perfectly fine to sit on this stool and just stare at the computer screen in anxious excitement. I’ll be back in bed by 8am at this rate.
11 No Available Tickets In New York? Okay, I’ll Just Do California
Man, that stinks, but it’s totally fine, I’ll just put in the first of my three backup NY dates. Nothing for any of those? Okay, looks like we are at DEFCON 2, I’m starting to sweat a little, but time to focus and just switch over to California. To be smart about it, the desktop is searching for one date, the laptop for another, this will be fine. San Jose is no New York but I can make some sacrifices. At least it’ll be cheaper, I won’t have to fly. This might actually work out better in the long run…
10 No Tickets In California? Fine, I’ll Just Search In A 3 State Radius
Okay. Steady. All my backup dates are unavailable but it’s crunch time. I just need to make a new plan. Note to self: how did I not know about the fan club tickets? I’ll deal with that later, but for now, I’ve already got the list of cities up and ready, I’ll just look for states near me. This is a major tour and tickets just went on sale, I can find something. Washington is perfect, let’s do that…okay, another 30 minutes gone to tell me there are no tickets there. Arizona seems to be nice, I can make that work. No Arizona tickets. Okay, fine, Texas it is.
9 Okay, 15 State Radius
We are officially at DEFCON 3. Anything, I will take any tickets anywhere in the United States. I don’t even need three tickets, I’ll take two and play out Sophie’s Choice. I just came back from Europe and can’t afford to fly back out there for one concert…can I? No, I’m losing focus, there has to be tickets left, I just need to be smart about it and look for a smaller city with the least amount of appeal. This is no time for games, the desktop is running, the laptop, and I’ve recruited an iPad. This is where all my multitasking experience is put to the test.
8 Yes!! 3 Tickets In The Nosebleeds, I’ll Take ‘em!
Oh my gosh. I can’t believe it. I did it! I’m actually going to see Adele! I just need to wait in another queue and put in my card information. And look at that, three tickets, so now I don’t have to break any bad news to my sisters. Sure, they may be a little disappointed New York didn’t work out, but hey, in the long run, what does it matter, we are going to see Adele! What a relief, I must say my confidence was beginning to waver for a minute there, got a little touch and go! All that’s in the past now and I can laugh about it.
7 Ticketmaster Password Account? I Don’t Have One…
Look Ticketmaster, I’m positive I don’t have an account (an oversight that will surely never happen again) so stop telling me that I do! 30 seconds to sign in? That’s ludacris! I’ll never be able to reset my IMAGINARY password in that amount of time! Alright, I’ll just have to guess! Think of every password I’ve ever used in the last three years and try them all! But I already know none of them will work because I’ve never had an account! There’s no time to create an account, is there? Maybe if I try it will connect me to another page and I’ll get more time.
6 Timed Out!?! Nnnnnoooooo!!!
This can’t be happening. 30 seconds ago I was on cloud 9 and now my dreams are laying shattered in tiny pieces on my kitchen floor. How can Ticketmaster dangle something so close in front of you and then rip it away in the blink of an eye? This isn’t part of the American Dream, what’s happening? Now I’m scrabbling to get back on the site and re-order. What city was it again, I can’t remember, I tried so many! If I get all three computers back up and running I might be able to find them again, right!? Never give up hope!
5 Sold Out.
Give up hope. All hope. I’m lost. Adrift at sea. My worst fears are confirmed. Only minutes have passed and now I can relate to Alice, falling down the deep dark rabbit hole. Who knows where I will land, but I know that wherever it is, Adele won’t be there to serenade me. It’s been hours since I began my quest and now I return, empty handed and heavy hearted. I fought gallantly but in the end, that’s of little consequence. It’s time to trade in the coffee for tequila. Hello, Adele. It’s me. From the bottom of the bottle.
4 Wait! I’ll Just Get VIP Tickets!
Man, I lost it there for a second! But what I failed to realize, in my fleeting depression, was that the general tickets are sold out. That means there’s still the three levels of VIP ticket options! I’m still in the game! Okay, so I was only planning on spending 150 per ticket, but the money I save on flights to New York, I can put towards VIP seats in Los Angeles. We can all cram into my studio apartment, so we are saving on hotel costs! Silly me, I totally lost control of all reality, how embarrassing.
3 No VIP Tickets?? Fine, I Didn't Want To Go Anyway.
How is that even possible? There are three separate tiers, each costing thousands of dollars. Who is buying up these tickets, the Queen? You’re both British, invite her over for tea and leave the tickets for us poor folk! Side note, I have got to find out what these people do for work. Who has thousands of dollars just sitting aside waiting for Adele to announce another tour? I was planning on selling a few non vital organs (is there such a thing?) but was that everyone else’s plan as well? Fine, I don’t even care about this stupid tour, I hate you Adele.
2 Oh My Gosh, I’m So Sorry, Please Forgive Me Adele
I know this is ridiculous, but just in case you heard that, Adele, I didn’t mean it. I’m so so sorry. I let my emotions get the best of me, and lashed out at you. You’re right, it was completely uncalled for. I just tried so hard to get to you, but I’m not making excuses, I’m sorry. I know it’s Ticketmaster and the organizational team's fault. How can they not know everyone would be dying to see you? How could this be so unorganized? I’m sure you aren’t even aware of the struggle right now because I know you’d put a stop to it if you did. #thestruggleisreal.
1 I’ll Punch Whoever Got Tickets.
And just like that, it’s over. As the dust clears, a few victors stand tall. We all know they better watch their back. They’re out there somewhere. A friend’s sister’s son-in-law got two tickets for Tennessee. A FaceBook acquaintance’s cousin got tickets in Pennsylvania and he isn’t even a fan! There should be some sort of Adele test to pass before you are allowed to purchase them. Every time we hear of someone announce they got tickets, we summon Bridesmaid’s Kristin Wiig’s words, “You doooo?” and fain happiness for them while making a mental note of where they live and what time they leave for work. The silly unknowing say, “Just wait for next time.” Oh, you mean another five years? There’s always scalpers…