Dating. Does a more confusing activity exist in the universe? Probably not. If you’re single and looking for a relationship, you’re probably pretty frustrated with the whole dating scene, especially now that everyone is using dating websites and apps. There’s so much advice out there and it’s all pretty conflicting. It’s hard to know what to say, and what to wear, and how to act. Of course you should just be yourself, but if you’re still unattached and are dreaming of being part of an adorable, happy couple, it’s difficult to stay positive and upbeat. Perhaps the trickiest part of dating is when you finally meet someone that you actually like and are trying to figure out where they stand. Do they want a quick fling or something much more meaningful? Don’t worry, you’re not alone: we’ve got you covered. Here are 13 signs he’s not looking for a one night stand.
13 He Listens To You
A guy who just wants a one night stand isn’t going to listen to anything you say on the first date. He’s too busy thinking about how he can invite you over in a super casual way because he’s afraid that if he’s too obvious about his intentions you’ll freak out on him (which you should, anyway). If you’re talking about your college degree, that funny story from your most recent vacation or even your all-time favorite TV show and your date is listening with all ears, you can be certain that there’s some long-term potential there.
12 He Acts Like A Gentleman
They say that chivalry is dead and hopefully that isn’t actually the case, because there’s something so adorable, charming, and old-fashioned when a guy opens doors for you, lets you order your drink or dinner before him, and overall acts like a real gentleman. Basically, if a guy pays for you on the first date, you can be sure he just might want to be your boyfriend. It’s always a good sign: he’s respectful and wants to do what society thinks is the right thing. The question of who should pay has been debated for a while now but it’s generally a positive thing.
11 He Thinks You’re Hilarious
You are, of course. You make everyone else in your life laugh from your mom to your best friends to your boss, so of course your date should think you’re basically a comedian as well. Think about how you act on first dates that are going well versus ones that are failing fast. You’re definitely more likely to want to go on a second date if you find your date funny, right? Guys feel the exact same way. If he can’t stop laughing, you’re looking at a pretty good shot at a relationship. Bonus points if he’s laughing even when you’re making a pretty lame joke or telling a semi-boring story. If he does that, you can be 100 percent sure that he really likes you.
10 He Sends You Super Boring Texts
It’s definitely a stereotype that girls are the ones who adore texting and will bug their boyfriends or crushes with mundane text messages 24/7. Guys definitely do that too, and if a guy is into you, he’ll be much more likely to send you a “Hey, what are you doing right now?” text at 12 p.m. on a random Tuesday afternoon. He basically just wants any excuse to reach out to you, even if he doesn’t actually have anything to say. It’s actually pretty romantic when you think about it.
9 He Talks About His Life
Basically, the fact that this guy is talking to you about important stuff at all is a pretty massive sign that he’s got future plans for you and him. If he just wanted to sleep with you, he’d never take the time to actually tell you stuff about himself and his past. He wants to get to know you and he wants you to know things about him too. He definitely wants to be your boyfriend if he talks about his friends and family and coworkers, because that means he wants to let you into his world a little bit.
8 He Treats You Super Well
If someone truly cares about you, they’re going to care about how they treat you. Simple as that. They won’t ghost you or ignore your phone calls or cancel plans at the last minute because a better offer came up. If this guy would rather die than miss his chance to go on a date with you, you can be pretty confident that he’s got more than a one night stand on his mind. After all, if you really want to see someone, you’ll make time for them and you’ll make sure to fit them into your busy schedule.
7 He Drops Tiny Hints
This is particularly telling on the first few dates, from the first date when you’re making semi-awkward small talk and praying everything goes well to the third date which is basically the deciding factor. If he’s dropping hints about the future – maybe he mentions a movie that’s playing in a month’s time or invites you to his friend’s birthday party that’s in two weekends – then he wants you to be a part of that future. Hallelujah. You’re not out of the woods yet – you have to wait and see if he actually follows through, of course, or else it’s just talk – but it’s a really good start.
6 He Compliments You
Compliments are a tricky thing. We want them but we don’t want to seem conceited, either, so we pretend it’s not a big deal if we never get them. But if your date sends one your way, you can be sure he likes you. It’s scary to be vulnerable enough to give a member of the opposite sex a compliment. If a guy calls you pretty or smart or funny, or even is bold enough to exclaim “You are so cool” on a date, he likes you. This is only a good sign, though, if he seems genuine and isn’t giving you compliments constantly, because that’s just weird and creepy. He honestly wouldn’t bother being so sweet if he didn’t care about you – too much effort.
5 He Avoids The No-Date Topics
You know the ones: ex-girlfriends, past dates (especially past online dates), religion, politics and money. If your date doesn’t talk about any of these things, that’s an amazing sign that he wants to see you again and it has nothing to do with getting you into bed. There’s nothing worse than a first date when the other person complains about their ex and swears that no one ever wants to go out with him and then goes on a political rant. And he wonders why he’s still single. Sometimes rules are meant to broken – life would be so boring if everyone followed the rules all the time – but first date conversation rules should be seen as sacred.
4 He Asks You Questions
Here’s the truth: if someone is making the effort to ask you a question, they honestly want to know the answer. They’re interested in your story and want to get to know you better. It’s even better if it’s your date who is doing the asking. If he found you super boring, he would just nod and half-smile throughout the whole evening and never ask you a single thing. That’s how you act on a bad first date, right? You definitely know that this guy wants to actually date you if he can’t stop asking questions. He just can’t help it, you’re just so interesting and fabulous.
3 He Extends The Date
There’s nothing better then when a date is going really well and he asks you if you want to go see a movie or head to another restaurant for dessert and another drink. It’s like the stars are aligned and you feel like you’re in your own version of a romantic comedy film. It’s an amazing sign when a guy extends a date… and it has nothing to do with heading back to his place. He’s totally fine hanging out with you, with your clothes on, in public, because he likes you for you.
2 He Is Super Patient
Everyone has their own timelines when it comes to love, romance, and sex. Generally, though, a guy who wants more than a one night stand will be super patient with you and totally respect your wishes. He will never, ever pressure you and will wait until you’re honestly ready. You wouldn’t want to date anyone who didn’t respect you anyway, so it’s definitely good news if you find a guy like this.
1 He Waits To Kiss You
Some people kiss on the first date, others wait a bit longer. It’s usually a good sign if a guy waits beyond the first date to plant one on you, because then you can be sure that he’s okay with letting the physical stuff unfold naturally. If he only wanted one thing, after all, he would be all over you within the first hour of your date (gross). The best things in life are worth waiting for and that includes that magical moment when you and your new guy kiss for the very first time. Yup, you’ve got a keeper.