Between the male and the female species, it’s women who are generally more into fashion than men. The world’s runways are filled with pieces and garments that cater to women from flowy skirts, to tailored pants to chunky shoes to the most outrageous accessories. Since fashion is mostly associated with women, it’s no wonder that we pride ourselves in being fashion experts over men. When we ask our man how we look after putting together a killer outfit, he’ll just say, “you look good.” But if a man asks his woman if he can pass mustard, she’ll turn up a critical eye and start nitpicking his look, from his choice of shirt, to the length of his pants, to the color of his socks.
That being said, we know what looks good on our man. We swoon over them when they’re dressed to the nines in outfits and accessories and styles that suit them. On the flip side, we also know what doesn’t work for them. Here are some examples of items on men that we absolutely cannot stand.
15 A moustache only
For men, having facial hair is one of the ultimate ways of displaying their masculinity because they feel it makes them look and feel more macho. Back during Biblical times, it was imperative that men grew their facial hair in full to distinguish them from women. Today, facial hair can be just as sexy on a man, especially if trimmed and groomed well. What many women don’t like though are just the moustache. Either rock the full facial hair—or none at all. Don’t go in-between by just growing a ‘stache. It’s too Hitler-ish.
The last time vests were the in-thing was back in the ‘90s and even then, we saw women rocking it more than men. It was touted a trendy fashion item and was worn by girls over tank tops and paired with jeans, shorts or denim skirts, and sneakers. But some men insist on wearing vests, even though they may not flatter a man fashion-wise the way they once looked cool on women 20 years ago. In this day and age, the only time we think guys would look hot in a vest is if they wore it as a waistcoat as part of a three-piece suit and manage to at least look like Harvey Specter from Suits.
13 White socks on formal black shoes and pants
One of the biggest fashion faux pas that men make is pairing the wrong colored socks with their pants and shoes during a formal occasion. One fine example is the use of white socks. White socks in themselves are pretty tricky to wear. If you’re playing sports or going for a casual look with jeans and sneakers, then white socks are acceptable. But when a man is heading to a formal occasion like a business dinner or a wedding, white socks on black patent leather shoes and black slacks are definitely not fit for the situation.
12 Super long swimsuit bottoms
Men’s swimsuits have evolved through the years and while teeny weeny Speedos are acceptable on professional swimmers, very few regular men can pull it off. It’s a good thing board shorts came into fashion and have become the norm when it comes to men’s swim attire. Ideally, board shorts are supposed to skim the knees. The length is just right. Not showing thigh and not skimming the calves like capri pants either. Women find the latter quite unflattering, that’s for sure.
As mentioned in the previous entry, it takes a lot of nerve to be able to put on Speedo swim briefs because very, very few men can pull it off. Even if you’ve got a fantastic body, it’ll be difficult to be able to move around with confidence and nary a care on the beach. First of all, it looks uncomfortably tight not just on the thigh area, but on the goods. Secondly, it can be quite distracting sunbathing on the beach and see a guy milling around you dressed in nothing but those teeny Speedos.
10 Deep V shirts
There’s something sexy about chest hair in men. Just like facial hair, women find chest hair on men quite a turn on, as long as it’s just a light smattering of it. A forest of chest hair is a totally different story. So men sometimes take it to heart and flaunt their chest hair like they’re God’s gift to the female species. They go so far as to sport deep V shirts. And when we say deep V, we mean the V goes down almost to the navel, exposing an indecently unhealthy amount of chest hair.
9 Fedora Hats
Fedora hats are intrinsically fine on their own. They’re stylish and chic and unique in the sense that not very many people can pull them off. And that’s where the problem lies. Not everybody looks good in a fedora. And certain me who insist on wearing them and don’t look good on them don’t realize that they can do without that particular accessory. Perhaps women associate a fedora with celebrity and Hollywood (hello, Justin Timberlake and Pharrell). But on the ordinary dude? Cringe-inducing.
8 Tight shirts tucked into tight jeans (Kanye at Met Gala)
One rule of thumb in women’s fashion is if you’re wearing skinny jeans, you pair it off with a loose, flowy top. If you go for baggy boyfriend jeans, it would look great with a tank top or fitted tee. Wearing baggy pants with a loose tee or tight pants with a fitted tee are certain no-nos. And this happens to hold true for men as well. Remember Kanye’s look at the Met Gala this year? In case you blocked it out, he was wearing a fitted white shirt and tight denims. Even if he were the most fit guy on the planet (which he’s not), it would have looked awkward.
7 Short denim shorts
Remember the days when men could give the ladies a run for their money when it came to exposing
scandalous amounts of leg? Yes, back in the day, the length of men’s shorts came up to their mid-thigh. This didn’t hold true just for athletes, but for casual wear as well. Unfortunately, there are some dudes who think short shorts are still a thing, despite the fact that they don’t do track and field. Even if they’ve got nice legs (and there are some men who do), please refrain from showing us too much of them.
6 Boot cut jeans
In case men aren’t aware, there are many different kinds of cuts for jeans. There’s skinny jeans, straight-cut, boyfriend jeans, bell bottoms and boot cut jeans. This applies mostly to women though. For men, it’s a little more straightforward: straight cut or loose. There are some men though who actually insist on wearing boot cut jeans. Even if it’s to elongate their legs and try to appear taller by hiding the shoes with platforms they’re wearing, boot cut jeans on men is just off-putting.
5 Man Uggs
Uggs. They’re the ultimate go to shoes for ladies when it’s too cold to wear sneakers and you’re too lazy to dress up. They’re so comfortable and convenient and can be worn with practically anything: jeans, leggings, shorts, you name it. But there is actually also such a thing as man Uggs. Not very many men are brave enough to be able to wear man Uggs over their pants. For those who are? Don’t get mad if you get the more than occasional odd look.
What better way for a guy to show off his toned arms and shoulders than by wearing sleeveless shirts even outside of the gym? The ultimate go-to for these workout-savvy males is the wife beater, also known as the macho shirt. It doesn’t exactly have any positive connotations, as the shirt was bestowed the controversial term because it’s connected to domestic violence. And it certainly isn’t the most flattering shirt, even for the most muscular of men.
3 Double Earrings
Yes, we remember the time when it was so cool for a guy to sport an earring on one ear. Some women found it sexy while others found it effeminate. Whatever the case, an earring on a guy was cool once upon a time. Today? Not so much. Unless you’re a rapper or a rock star or a pirate, women see no reason why men should still be hanging on to their ear jewelry. What makes it worse? Double earrings. Even Daniel Day-Lewis couldn’t pull it off.
2 Soul Patch
Some women may think it’s sexy, but most find it cringe-worthy. For those wondering what exactly a soul patch is, it’s that little patch of hair growing just beneath the lower lip and trailing down mid-chin. In other words, it’s a “fashionable” form of facial hair. But like the moustache, many women find it awkward. It’s the same thinking: either go for the full-on beard or just go cleanly shaven. Having a soul patch is just that strange, in-between way of saying you’re capable of growing facial hair.
1 Birkenstocks with socks
There was once a time when Birkenstocks were all the rage. They were the Crocs of the 1990s, so to speak. Everyone had at least one pair, from moms to dads to teenagers to kids to toddlers to grandparents. Birks, as they’re so fondly nicknamed, are meant to be worn over the summer, when it’s warm and the sun shines bright. What we don’t get is why there are some guys who wear their Birks with socks. These shoes were meant to be worn when it’s hot. Why wear them when your feet are so cold that you feel the need to wear socks? Or maybe you didn’t get a pedicure and don’t want to show off your toes? If that’s the case, don the socks, but wear sneakers instead of Birks!