We meet a new guy and we like him more than we've liked anyone, ever. Before we go on a few dates and then decide that we're in a relationship with each other, we should ask ourselves a really great question: is he a show-off or more casual and low-key?
That will tell us about his personality and how he's going to behave when he's our boyfriend, or even in the weeks leading up to that serious conversation.
We don't have a Magic 8 ball (remember those?!) and we can't see into the future. We don't know exactly how he's going to act once we get into a more serious relationship, but we can at least make things a bit easier for ourselves and know what type of person we're dealing with.
It basically goes without saying that we would all prefer to date a low-key, chill guy instead of a total show-off. We don't want to be blindsided and we want to make sure that we enter a new relationship and feel as prepared as we can. Once we fall in love, though, things do get much tougher.
Read on to find out 12 subtle signs that he's a show-off and 8 that prove that he's low-key.
Does this guy post only selfies on social media, and it seems like every time we scroll through our feeds, that's exactly what we see? This might not seem like a huge deal since everyone posts selfies. Our best friends, our coworkers, even our mom might.
This feels subtle, but it's definitely a clear sign that he's a show-off. The fact that he loves taking pictures of himself doesn't necessarily mean that he's incredibly full of himself... but it's possible that he is. If he was more casual and chill, he wouldn't be so comfortable snapping all these pics of his face.
On the other hand, we can tell that he's low-key if he feels super awkward smiling for photos. It's just not his thing. We can tell that he tries his best to look happy and sweet when someone snaps a photo of him, but he's having a tough time. He doesn't want to offend the person who's taking the photo, whether it's his mom or sister or a friend.
We would probably all agree that we would rather date someone who isn't super comfortable in front of a camera. It's much more attractive than a guy who can't stop taking selfies because he really loves getting that kind of attention.
Is it our pet peeve when a guy orders for the girl that he's dating at a restaurant? We might see this in a movie and think, "OMG I would go nuts if someone did that for me." Or, hey, we might think that it's romantic and sweet. It's a subjective thing.
If we don't like this, then we would say that a guy is a total show-off when he orders for us. And we wouldn't really want to keep dating him. We can definitely order for ourselves... and we want to. It's part of the fun of going out to eat (besides ordering appetizers, dinner, and dessert, of course).
It's awesome when a guy offers to make us dinner. It's sweet whether he cooks us dinner in our apartment (and brings over all the ingredients, plus maybe some fresh flowers) or invites us over to his place.
It's not so awesome or sweet when we realize that this makes him a show-off. Every time that we stay in instead of going out, he insists on making us "the best dinner ever." This is just another way for him to act like he's so amazing and no one else would ever be able to do this for us. We're not going to like this very much.
Low-key guys make the best boyfriends since they are pretty much cool with anything. As long as they still speak up and let us know about how they're feeling, then it's probably a recipe for a really great love story.
A low-key guy will prefer staying in because he feels really comfy when he can chill out at home... but he won't mind going out, either. He wants to have a good night and he knows that he will, as long as he's hanging out with us. He doesn't want to make a big scene or fuss and he just wants us to have fun together.
Another subtle sign that he's a show-off is if he likes to be the one to text us first. We might not notice that this makes him a show-off because we're so glad that he's texting us. This is particularly the case if we've been dating guys that weren't that nice to us.
He wants to text us first every day because he wants to be in charge and control the conversation. It's not really that cute when we think about it like that, right?! He might text us at super inconvenient times, like 6 a.m. when we're barely up, because he wants to text first.
Another subtle way to tell that he's a show-off is if he always asks us a lot of questions. At first, we think that this is a good thing for him to do. He wants to know more about us, right?
The problem is that he asks us a lot of questions so he can act like he knows the answers. He might even tell us that he thinks he knows what we're going to say.
It's tough to talk to someone who acts this way, and even harder to be in a relationship with them, so we're probably not going to like this side of him very much (or think that he would make an ideal BF).
In total contrast with show-offs who really can't stop talking, low-key guys like to do more listening than talking. We can say that he's definitely low-key when he smiles a lot when we're together and listens really well.
Could we dream up a more ideal and romantic scenario than this? We don't think so.
It makes us wonder why some people always have to show off and others really like to listen and have a nice, more chill and more low-key conversation. That'll just have to be a mystery. All we can do is realize that we like low-key guys more than we like show-offs.
Is he always talking to someone on the phone, or texting, or on his social media feeds? If that's the case, then he's definitely a show-off.
He always needs to be on his phone because he always wants to be the center of attention. He might be on his phone even when he's at a party. He always has to be the focus, and he gets really upset when he's not. This is tough to deal with since we might be embarrassed by how often he uses his phone in public or around our friends and family since, of course, it's not the most polite behavior in the world.
It can be tough to date a really low-key guy at first because he's not super big on telling us his opinions. We might not even know how he feels about a restaurant or even a certain type of food or band because he just shrugs and smiles and says that it's awesome. When someone says that everything is cool with him, how do we know that it actually is?
We can also tell that he has a low-key vibe and personality when he has really great date ideas... but only if we straight-up talk to him about it and ask him what he wants to do. We can definitely encourage him to speak up more.
Does he invite us to really fancy and elegant events and parties all the time? Sure, he acts like these are going to be fun, great date nights... but it really seems like he just wants to show us off.
A low-key guy wouldn't be comfortable at these events, and he wouldn't even want to go to them at all. This is a good way to separate a low-key guy from a show-off.
Of course, if we asked him why he wanted to go to all these fancy parties, he would just shrug and say that they're going to be romantic (or something that is equally charming).
Sometimes we don't even notice when someone is totally bragging about themselves. It's actually pretty amazing how this can happen. When we're dating a guy and he brags about himself (usually about going to the gym a lot and how good he is at his job), he might not do it in a super obvious way.
Sometimes, he only brags when someone asks him a question, and then he's off and running. Once we realize that he's doing this, we won't be able to forget it and we'll notice it all the time. It'll definitely be entertaining... and, let's be real here, pretty annoying.
When a guy seems like he's fairly quiet and shy but he always remembers the things that we tell him, it's another sign that he's low-key.
He's not the kind of person to hog the conversation or talk about himself all the time. That make him really uncomfortable and also make him feel bad since he's kind and he wants to hear what we have to say to him. Since he's low-key and not a show-off at all, he's a great listener. That's such a nice quality to find in someone, especially someone who we want to be in a relationship with.
Have we ever met a friend's boyfriend and totally thought that he was conceited and rude... but when we told that to another friend who was also there, they didn't feel the same way?
This is probably because he was talking about himself a lot... but he was also asking other people a lot of questions. People who are show-offs tend to be very friendly and social as well as love the sound of their own voice. They ask other people questions, but they often interrupt and don't let them get through their whole answer. Chances are, he was asking so many questions that people didn't notice that he was the only one talking.
Show-offs might think that they're hilarious, but they're not always all that funny. Sometimes a guy who is totally low-key will be so much funnier than a more talkative or outgoing guy.
If he has a really awesome sense of humor that seems to come completely out of nowhere, that proves that he's got a low-key and casual personality. It also proves that he's a perfect person for us to date. Is there anything more wonderful than a funny guy?! Okay, maybe a funny guy who is also low-key. That is really the best boyfriend that we could ask for.
If he double texts on a regular basis and sends us super long text messages, that's another subtle sign that he's a show-off. It's subtle because we just assume that he has a lot to say or that he really wants to chat with us.
In reality, though, he wants to show off that he's smart. He really likes the sound of his own voice (or the look of his own words when he texts them to someone, which is more accurate). It's not really the best look for someone. He should want to hear what we have to say just as much as he wants to talk.
Does he have a really big group of friends? At first, when we start dating a new guy and he has a big social circle, this seems awesome. We get a lot of invites to events and we start getting introduced to a lot of new people. It seems like a cool opportunity to make some new friends.
But this is also a subtle sign that he's a show-off because he needs to be the center of attention. It's important to him to have a lot of friends because he always wants other people to focus on him. These might not even be real, true friends, either.
Low-key guys are totally where it's at because they can chill anywhere and they can make the most of many situations. We can tell that he's low-key when he likes doing things on his own, like going to the movies (particularly when it's something that no one that he knows wants to see). But he also really likes going to the movies or to other places with us.
This is the type of boyfriend that we want to have, that's for sure. We know that if we want to hang out with our friends, he's cool with that and he can enjoy being by himself.
He's a total show-off when he really likes taking photos of us. Why? Because he likes to show that he's dating someone.
Like many things that a show-off does, this can seem really great at first. We assume that he's being sweet and that it's a good thing that he's taking photos of us (plus some couple selfies). He might seem upset if he doesn't get a lot of likes or comments on these photos once he uploads them to social media, though, and that's a sign he's just trying to be a show-off rather than be cute with his GF.
Low-key guys have a lot of confidence, even if they don't always show it. They definitely don't put it all out there the way that guys who are show-offs do, which actually makes them a lot more charming and attractive.
We can tell that he's a low-key guy when he doesn't always make the first move, but we can always see a lot of confidence in him. Sure, sometimes he'll ask a girl out, but other times, he's shy and might wait to see if she asks him out.
We'd all be super lucky to find a guy who is more low-key than a show-off, that's for sure.