As each year comes to a close, we become thoughtful. We think about what we’ve accomplished and our successes and failures seem obvious. We curse ourselves for the dreams we didn’t get around to chasing and make lists of our goals for the next year, hoping it’ll be better. We also start figuring out what we’re doing on December 31st, aka New Year’s Eve. It seems super important that we spend the last evening of the year doing something incredibly fun. While some people truly love this evening and love any excuse to get dolled up, others know the truth: it’s a poor excuse for a holiday. There’s an old saying that how you spend this night will determine how you spend the rest of your year, but that just seems mean. Here are 11 reasons why New Year’s Eve is just the worst.
11 It’s not a Real Holiday
You can get behind Christmas. Everyone loves Christmas. It’s a magical time full of snow (hopefully), sharing sugar cookies with friends and relatives, and everyone is usually pretty happy. Even Easter is fun – it’s all about a huge delicious meal – and Valentine’s Day may kind of suck if you’re single but at least you can eat your weight in chocolate. But New Year’s Eve is a fake holiday. You can’t give people presents, there’s no traditional food to make, and it’s basically all about getting drunk and going out. That’s like a regular party. What’s the point?
10 It’s Expensive
Have you ever tried to go out to dinner on New Year’s Eve? Talk about crazy expensive. A single dinner basically costs your entire year’s salary. Okay, that may be a total exaggeration, but it’s not actually far from the truth: a dinner at Empire Steak House in NYC will set you back $21,000. Other places may not be quite that costly but still cost a pretty penny with pre-fix menus and that’s not even counting the crazy amounts of alcohol you’re going to end up ordering. You’ll definitely end up eating way more than you planned since it’s a celebratory evening and all your friends will be ordering non-stop, and soon you’ll have spent hundreds of dollars. Oops.
9 The Crowds are Insane
If you like to hide out in your apartment on December 31st, you’re not as crazy as you think. The crowds on this night are absolutely insane. Since some cities offer free public transit – Toronto’s TTC is free all night long – that means more and more people are going to be riding the subways and buses, making it impossible to get anywhere. Just try to go downtown on NYE, I dare you. You’ll see more people than you thought even lived in your city or town, and elbowing your way through the crowds will exhaust you before the night has even truly begun.
8 People Wear too Much glitter
Since when did New Year’s become the glitter holiday? All of a sudden, women of all ages decided that you definitely have to wear as much glitter as possible or it’s just not NYE. This means glittery golden dresses, sparkly silver miniskirts, shiny eye shadow and nail polish – you name it. The last night of the calendar year or not, let’s face it: glitter can be pretty tacky. It’s completely possible to look fancy and pretty without subjecting yourself to this stuff. Plus, it’ll get everywhere – have you ever tried to remove glitter from your skin? It’s not a fun time.
7 There’s too Much Pressure
Thanks to our social media addictions, we want every moment of our lives to be incredibly perfect. New Year’s Eve is no different. There’s so much pressure to be perfect and to make everyone who’s following you think you’re having "the best time ever", it makes your head spin. In the end, you’re not enjoying your night out, but instead, figuring out the best way to Instagram it to the world. That’s not living, that’s just being obsessed with a concept of perfection that doesn’t actually exist. New Year’s Eve is just the worst night of the year, especially for this reason.
6 Watching The Ball Drop is Boring
Okay, so you stayed home – or you arrived home early, just in time to watch the ball drop on TV. It’s pretty boring, right? When we’re kids, being given permission from our parents to stay up late (past midnight! OMG) to watch the ball drop in Times Square feels like the greatest gift. Now that you’re an adult (hopefully), you just don’t feel the same excitement. There’s a huge glittery ball, it falls to the ground, big whoop. When you think about it, it’s even crazier that people stand in the cold for hours in Times Square because that ball is pretty dangerous: it’s a total of 11,875 pounds. What if it fell on someone?
5 You Anticipate Your Hangover
Since New Year’s is about one thing – drinking – and one thing only, you basically already know that you’re going to be incredibly hungover the next morning. Who wants to be hungover on the first day of the brand new year? Does that sound like a smart way to start an entirely new year? Isn’t that a bad omen or something? You just don’t get it and you’d rather not plan to be completely hungover. It’s bad enough without knowing it’s going to happen. If you go out, you know your friends will nag you to drink just one more shot and there will be no escaping them.
4 You can’t get a cab
So you ignore your better instincts and go out. You indulge in a few too many cocktails and want to call a cab to get home safely. Bad news: you can’t get a cab. Not a single one. It turns out that NYE is the all-time busiest time for cab drivers and even last year Uber predicted that the night would be incredibly busy. Why would you willingly go out on a night when you know that every cab company you call will be way too busy to answer? What are you going to do, brave the crazy crowded subway with its hordes of drunk people? No thank you. Might as well stay home.
3 You Have Zero Resolutions
If drinking is part 1 of NYE, then making resolutions is part 2. Is there anything more lame and annoying than New Year’s resolutions? People just break them anyway, right? Take the resolution to actually work out on a regular basis, for example. Everyone knows that by February 1, everyone has completely given up on getting healthy and is back to lying on the couch with potato chips and soda. You don’t want to make any grand plans or goals for the new year. It hasn’t even begun – who knows what’s going to happen? You’re still getting over your Christmas sugar cookie high.
2 You get Major FOMO
If you do give into your deepest desires and stay home on New Year’s Eve to celebrate with a bottle of red wine and a party of one, you get FOMO (fear of missing out). You can’t help browsing Facebook and Instagram while watching TV, and you see all your friends looking sparkly and beautiful, partying the night away. You wonder why you even stayed home in the first place… and then remember. Oh right. You hate New Year’s. You start to feel a little better but the damage is done. Whether you stay in or head out into the great big world, this night is always going to suck.
1 You Have no one to kiss at Midnight
It may be a silly tradition – like mistletoe during the Christmas season – but if you’re single on New Year’s Eve, you’re going to hate the fact that you have no one standing beside you, waiting to kiss you once the clock strikes 12. It makes you feel even more alone than you already do. You hope 2016 will be the year that you finally find your Prince Charming and that hope keeps you going… for another five minutes. Then it’s back to total despair. You finally head to bed, glad that it’s over, and happy that you have an entire year before another New Year’s Eve rears its ugly head.