Our phones are basically glued to our hands nowadays. There are even products out there that can help us scroll while we suds up in the shower. Phones are more than ever present in our lives, and we personally don’t think that’s a bad thing.
We love the way that our devices make it easy for us to keep in touch with friends, family, and even strangers. The instant validation of sending a love-filled compliment to a partner can make it crazy tempting to keep that phone on and attached to us. And not to mention the practical things like Google Maps, e-mail, and mid-day reminders to pick up more milk.
It’s not that we condone phone dependency. We just recognize that it’s an inevitable part of everyday life, and especially our relationships. We believe that when we text the right thing to our guy, we're showing him what a quality partner we are.
When texting is a part of the relationship already, why not go ahead and use it to our benefit? That’s why we decided to figure out the best things to send to our partner. These are the texts that prove we’re totally wifey material and are always keeping our focus on the partnership (and our future hubby!).
20 The Message: ‘This Thing Made Me Think Of You’
Let’s start with the basics. This is a message that we can send both in a new relationship and a well-aged one. Regardless of whether you’ve been together for two months or two years, you likely know enough about the partner in question to be reminded of them in everyday life.
Whether it’s a song on the radio or a fresh meme popping up on your feed, be sure to mention it in a message to your partner. In fact, if it is a photo or online comic, don’t be afraid to send it to them properly. It might even give them a giggle.
19 Why: It Shows We’re Thinking About Him
Refinery29 backs us up on the quality of this message. They say that it really is a good idea to send our partner these kinds of memory moments because it shows that we’re thinking about him. It also has the added benefit of being a little more active than just saying “I miss you.”
By sharing a song, photo, comic, or meme, it gives him something to engage with. Maybe he’ll comment on it or send a hilarious photo back. Maybe he’ll send it around to his friends, earning us a few of those sweet, sweet brownie points. Either way, this is a classic message that shows a lot of heart.
18 The Message: ‘Do You Want Sushi Or Pizza Tonight?’
We also would not judge you for throwing an “or both” in there. Everyone loves pizza, and almost everyone loves sushi, so why not offer a delicious buffet of both of our favorite options? Though, to be fair, you could switch out those foodstuffs with pretty much anything; especially if you two had been discussing a certain kind of food fairly recently.
After all, we all have to eat. This text message is gold because it uses something we all love (i.e., food!) to get something we all want (more partner time). It might feel direct, but trust us, it works.
17 Why? It’s Forward, But Not Too Pushy
This is something that we do need to be careful of, especially in a new relationship. Being forward is an excellent way to be, but being pushy isn’t necessarily going to go well over the long term. This is a text message that’s best accompanied by a caveat as well: “I know we didn’t make plans, but if we were getting dinner…”
Unless your partner is confident and direct in his own right. Then we’re sure that he’ll appreciate the confidence of this message. Plus, it results in delicious food. Who doesn’t love that? Even if we don’t get to go to dinner tonight, it might set us up for a future date.
16 The Message: Any Deep Question
Refinery29 mentions asking questions like “what’s your passion?”, “what are your hopes and dreams for life?”, and even, “what are you afraid of?”. We don’t think that it’s necessarily a bad thing to ask these early on, but we do think that it’s fair to read the tone of your relationship before texting something deep.
If you two are clicking well emotionally, don’t be afraid to dive in during a late night text conversation. If you two are still fairly new and still trying to figure each other out, maybe stay out of the deep end of the pool for a while yet.
15 Why? It Turns The Conversation More Personal
Personal is important, as a relationship is an interpersonal connection. We connect with other people on both the surface level as well as on a deeper level. When the two of you have been dating for a while, it’s probably well established that the relationship is surface-level compatible. Both of you like Stranger Things, both of you love pineapple on pizza, and both of you know every word of Panic! At The Disco’s first album.
It’s the deeper connection that will breed long-term compatibility, though. Dreams, passions, hopes, and fears are all conversation topics that we believe will strengthen your bond.
14 The Message: ‘Good Morning’ And ‘Good Night’
Thought Catalog mentions this one, which is why we absolutely had to include it. And why not, right? These messages might be a classic, but they really are the simplest ways to let your partner know that you’re thinking about them.
A good morning starts everyone’s day off right, while a good night both closes out a conversation and lets them know they’re on your mind. If your partner isn’t a texter and two messages a day seems like too much, we also would recommend throwing a “happy day off!” message out there when you know they’re finally getting some time to relax.
13 Why? He Knows He’s The First And Last Thing On Our Mind
We’ve said it before and we’ll say it again: he just wants to know that we’re thinking about him. This is why we can replace those ever-present “good morning” and “good night” messages with something schedule-specific, and it’ll still have the same effect. At the end of the day, all we really want to know is that our partner is thinking about us.
While the daily bookends are great for achieving that, there are a variety of ways we can make it happen. Plus, these are more fun than sending generic “thinking about you” texts. Implying it is much stronger, in our experience.
12 The Message: ‘My Cat Misses You So Much!’
This message suggestion came right from Refinery29, but it’s so adorable we couldn’t not include it. The logic behind this one is similar to what we said above; we all want to tell our partner that we miss them and are thinking about them, but it’s never as impactful saying it outright as it is delivering the message in a cute way.
Plus, this message also brings up images of your adorable pet in his mind. Which, by extension, gets him thinking of that amazing weekend you two spent when you had the apartment all to yourself. Need we say more?
11 Why? Implied Innuendo Aside, Everyone Loves Cute Pets
There are a few other points we want to mention. This message might feel a little dorky on the surface (after all, we all know that most cats are too proud to admit they miss their owners, let alone the stranger that appeared in their home one day). However, it really will get a smile out of your partner.
Plus there’s the added benefit of the innuendo, which can allow for things to steam up quick. Not into that? No worries. Replace “my cat” with the actual name of the pet. If he remembers, it’ll click right away, and if he doesn’t, well, it might make for a cute punchline.
10 The Message: ‘My Friends And I Are Going Out Tonight; You Should Come!’
At first, we weren’t sure why this message kept coming up in our research. After all, doesn’t it go without saying that our partner is invited when it comes to group hangouts? According to Refinery29, that actually might not be the case. They had a very interesting explanation as to why this message means so much.
However, we want to stress the fact that you don’t need to call him to come running every time you and your 12 BFFs decide to hit up happy hour after work. We all need time with our friends, independent of our significant other.
9 Why? It Brings Him Into Our Life And Lets Him Know We’re Proud
This is the biggest thing Refinery29 mentioned about this text. It might seem normal on the surface, but it’s actually a subconscious sign to our partner that we’re really, truly invested in him. We love the way that this not only says “I want you to be involved in my life,” but it also says “I”m not afraid to show you off to my friends.”
And, if you’re anything like us, you know just how important the BFF opinion is when it comes to a new relationship. We want to make him feel proud, and this is a great way to do it. Plus, more IRL hanging is awesome for any blossoming couple.
8 The Message: ‘I Love The Way You (Insert Compliment Here)’
Compliments are the spice of life. Wait, no, it’s supposed to be variety. Maybe it’s a variety of compliments that spices things up? That one sounds right to us, and it certainly sounds right to our partner as well! Thought Catalog suggested a variety of these kinds of text messages, but we know deep in our hearts that the whole point is to keep things fresh and personal.
A generic “I like your hair” is nice to receive, sure, but it doesn’t exactly light us up. The same goes for our partner. When you compliment them, be sure to mention something specific that you like about them. It’s much more personal.
7 Why? He Loves A Good Compliment Just As Much As We Do
We can forget that our partners need as much love as we do. Relationships go both ways, after all, and we should expect to put in a little effort in order to receive effort back. A compliment is a great way to spark a conversation, as well as to break that awkward post-date tension of “should I text him yet or not.”
Compliments are almost always well received, in our experience, and no one will ever fault us for wanting to send and share those messages. Making them personal and specific really shows that the compliment is meant for him, as well, which gives the sense that we actually put some time and effort into it.
6 The Message: ‘I Wish You Were Eating This Pizza With Me’
Some people might feel a little insecure sharing their personal post-work pizza party, but we firmly believe that it’s something to celebrate. As Refinery29 mentioned, this text message is meant to be sent with an adorable pizza-eating selfie attached to it. The whole point is to send a little reminder about you and your own life.
This works especially well for guys who are always hungry, or if you two have bonded over some late-night crust love. No need to go into the pizza details either, unless you really want to. This message is all about cute selfies and yummy crusts.
5 Why? Straightforward And Might Even Lead To A Pizza Night
We know, we know: we’re spending a lot of time talking about pizza. Well, grab those extra napkins, and be prepared to wipe the grease off your phone screen. More pizza is in your future, especially thanks to that last text message. Some of these texts make it all about your partner, but we think there’s value in keeping some of them focused on you, too.
After all, your partner is probably your second biggest fan (the first biggest being you, right?). They’ll love receiving a cute selfie, and it’ll instantly make them want to spend time with you. The pizza is just a convenient excuse.
4 The Message: ‘Let’s Talk About This More In Person’
This text message can sometimes read a bit ominously. We were hesitant when Refinery29 suggested it, but after talking things over with our partner we established that miscommunication can be easily avoided. Talking about something in person isn’t code for “I want to break up” or anything negative like that. And, unless the context of the text messages is negative, it’s unlikely he’s going to read into it like that.
If you’re worried about being misconstrued there’s no harm in adding a preface as well: “I can’t type as fast as my brain is thinking about all this! This conversation is so good, let’s talk about this more in person.” See? Positive vibes only.
3 Why? It Shifts Things Into Real Life Easily
It’s important to note that, no matter how amazing our texting skills are, they won’t get us to where we want to be with our partner if we don’t bring things into real life every now and then. The text message we mentioned above is important to send every once in a while, especially if you and your partner are still in the dating-app-messaging stage.
After a certain point, the relationship has to move into non-digital life, and that’s when we really see the emotional shift. Spending time with a person you like is wonderful, and that’s the text message that will get us there.
2 The Message: 'I'm Grabbing Snacks, Want Anything?'
From the gas station to the dollar store to the Trader Joe’s down the street, this text message can be sent anytime, anywhere. There’s always a place to grab snacks, and there’s always going to be somebody pleased that we’re offering to pick things up for them. We’ve all heard that old stereotype about the way to a person’s heart is through their stomach, right? We’ve started to discover that it just might be true.
We fall in love with someone a little more when they show up with pizza and french fries, and we know that the same can be said for our partner when we show up holding a box or bag.
1 Why: Because He Loves Us Even More When We Show Up With Snacks
We admit we couldn’t find any official research to back this up; just the adoring look we receive when we shower our partner in Skittles, Maltesers, and barbeque chips. Even if we’re not a fan of the snacks, they certainly are. The fact we’re thinking about their likes and wellbeing enough to fork over some of our snack money for their happiness speaks volumes.
Watching them squeal with joy over foodstuffs fills our heart with glee; not to mention how snack runs can often lead to longer Netflix marathons, which can lead to some well-deserved cuddle time at the end of a long week.
Sources: Thought Catalog, Refinery29