Guys can be great. They can be wonderful bearers of flowers and compliments, of chocolate and warm and fuzzy feelings. But on the flip-side, they can also be crushers when it comes to feelings: totally oblivious and just plain inattentive.
Then again, women aren't the easiest beings to get along with, but we that doesn't mean we shouldn't be treated fairly, right?
Right. That's why it's important to know the signs between a guy who's falling head over heels and one who's just stringing a gal along. We know what everyone's probably thinking, though; isn't it obvious? If a guy isn't into someone, why would he act as though he is? We're here to remind everyone that sometimes, guys do weird things and sometimes, they really can just be players.
The signs aren't always obvious, but the one thing to take away is this: no matter how much a woman believes a man is her 'soul mate', if she doesn't feel 110% in her relationship, then he's not the guy for her.
Sometimes, the guy we all wait for is actually sitting right under our pretty noses and we just don't recognize it. These tips and red flags are exactly what we all need to find our missing Prince Charming, whether we're in the process of opening our hearts to one or kicking an imposter out of them.
20 Being Strung: His Texts Consist Of Four-Word Responses
We get it, it's a typical male move to avoid texting full sentences. It's not out of the norm but on the same token, there should be some kind of conversation happening eventually—especially if things have progressed past the bedroom phase of the relationship.
No girl should ever surrender herself to a guy who can't text more than, 'sure, lol' or 'yep' or even 'nah, it's cool'. Adults can, and should, communicate better than a ninth grader. If he's throwing out all of these texts that are meaningless and essentially serve to answer questions in the most basic of ways, he's probably not the one.
19 Catching Feelings: His Nerves Start To Show Ever So Slightly
Most of us have been in a position where we've had butterflies, right? Some of us may have even been prone to birds flying around in there (we know it, you know it, so let's just know it together). There's nothing wrong with this and it's a great sign... it means you're growing feelings!
Believe it or not, guys get this too but are way too macho most of the time to admit it. Their nerves flourish and take them over just as ours do and it's those subtle moments of insecurity that give away so much. If he stutters, becomes flushed, or just acts differently around you, it could be a definite sign that he's feeling more than friendship.
18 Being Strung: It's Is Nothing But A Physical Connection
It's pretty easy to tell when a guy is hanging on for more than just a deep conversation. Some girls are totally fine with this (more power to you) but when it's something you're not looking for, it can just turn into a bad experience.
This kind of behavior usually goes hand in hand with the lack of exclusivity talk, the dodgy conversations, and mysterious whereabouts. Chances are if he's hanging on for looks alone, then he might be a multiple-woman type of guy and that's something no one wants to be part of. Take this as a surefire sign that he's looking for bedpost notches, not a one-and-only.
17 Catching Feelings: He Looks At You For Longer Than Usual
The best part about a new relationship, or any type of friendship before it even becomes a relationship, is 'the look'. You know which one we're talking about! When he glances over without you realizing and his gaze lingers a bit longer than it normally would, yet there's something different about it.
Do you know what that difference is? It's called 'feels', and he totally has them. It's this look that has initiated many a stomachache and eventually leads to something far more than friendship. This look is serious business and it's the number one sign that your former best friend is feeling much more.
16 Being Strung: His Friends Are Never Part Of The Picture
If a guy is stringing his gal pal along, there's no way that his friends are going to be involved in the picture. He's likely not going to be making any type of commitment at all, especially one that has to do with introducing a fling to anyone he knows. It sounds harsh and that's because it is...
No girl should ever feel as though she's not important enough to be involved in her boyfriend's (or what have you) life. He'll either go out of his way to avoid bringing you out in front of his friends or conveniently dodge plans every time another person could be around.
15 Catching Feelings: Texts Become Frequent And Longer
Another cute thing that happens when a guy catches feelings is that all of a sudden, his communication changes. Rather than give typical, two-word guy answers, he's texting you full sentences. He might even send a paragraph here or there.
Additionally, he'll do the thing that everyone does when they're excited about talking to someone... They'll send a response in a total of five texts and your chat will feel as though it's sitting on the ' ... ' notification forever. It's a good thing and it's super adorable, and guys don't just do that with any girl unless they're naturally talkative which, let's face it, is rare.
14 Being Strung: Still Haven't Met His Family After Months
This goes right back to the whole non-exclusivity issue. First, a guy will deny the existence of anything exclusive and anything even resembling a relationship. Second, he'll go as far as making trips to your place before inviting you over to his. When he does invite you over, he'll make excuses about needing to leave 'really early' to get you out. Then, when the topic of friends comes up, he'll always have yet another excuse.
By the time you're asking about his family, he's claiming he doesn't even have one. All of these are signs that point to a guy who does not want a commitment of any kind, and it's quite obvious.
13 Catching Feelings: Flirting Vs. Being Best Friends
The line can often be blurred between being best friends and potentially being something more. When it comes down to it, we've all seen this happen in our favorite romcoms. Guy meets girl, they can't stand each other initially, they begin warming up, friendship blossoms and then boom, they're getting married by the end of the movie.
Of course, that's not real life, but there's no reason that we can't all have our own individual love stories. Everything starts with a little friendly flirting and usually when a guy does it, it's quite obvious. Take this as a sign and start acting like Kate Hudson, girl.
12 Being Strung: The Word 'Exclusive' Is Dodged Heavily
There's no getting around it; he's just not giving in. Not that you'd want him to, because there's nothing worse than being forced into a relationship if you're just not a relationship person. Anyone who has been in a situation where a guy wholeheartedly refuses to use the words 'exclusive', 'relationship', 'dating', or 'girlfriend' knows that it's not an easy conversation to have.
The point being, if it's that difficult to bring up in the first place, then the answer to your question may have already been addressed. Asking to be exclusive should be fun and exciting, something to look forward to. It shouldn't be stressful and nerve-wracking.
11 Catching Feelings: He Wants To Hang Out Alone Without Other Friends
In stark contrast to wanting to hang out alone due to the fact that he doesn't want to introduce a potential girlfriend to his friends, this can sometimes mean the opposite. If a guy is going from full-on group hangouts and suddenly wants some alone time, it might be that he's looking for his 'in'.
Especially if the two of you have never hung out alone before, this might be his way of implying that he'd like to get to know you, one on one. It's a cute gesture and totally a sign that he's into his friend, and it's also a super thoughtful way to avoid rushing things.
10 Being Strung: Paying For Things Like Gas, Food, Dates, Never Happens
There's no law stating that anyone a woman is dating is required to pay for any and all things. That notion went out the window a long time ago, along with courting suitors and wearing your finest suit to take a girl out on the town. However, courtesy does still exist, along with manners, and if a guy is asking a woman out on a proper date, that does imply that she won't be paying for everything.
The act of paying for things is just a nice gesture and a testament to the fact that someone enjoys your company enough to take care of you. If a 'relationship' lacks this, then perhaps it's not really a relationship at all.
9 Catching Feelings: He'll Noticeably Shy Away From Other Female Friends
If a guy is trying to make a girl his one and only, he might actually take it a step further and start opting to make one girl his main. Simply put, he could distance himself from other girls (especially if there was some flirtation prior) in order to make a pass at the one girl he really has feelings for.
There's nothing worse than having feelings for someone but having to navigate a friend group filled with tons of other girls, especially if they're overly friendly. Maintaining some distance is a (very) subtle way of him letting you know that he has eyes for someone, but it's none of them.
8 Being Strung: He Hasn't Cared To Get To Know Your Family
Just as he wouldn't push a girl to get to know his, he's definitely not going to go out of his way to get to know any of his date's families. He either has no desire given the lack of relationship status, or he's really trying hard to avoid being sucked into something more serious.
Either way, this spells out bad news bears for any girl who's hanging her hopes on a serious future for the two of them. Not everyone is in for the long-haul and, in all honesty, if a guy isn't respectful enough to meet the 'rents, is he really someone you'd want to bring home to them?
7 Catching Feelings: The Compliments Are Subtle But Cute
While it's entirely possible that your guy friend could just be acting, well, like a friend, it's also possible there's something more to it. Compliments are a beautiful thing and can be purely platonic, but they can also mean more if it's not his usual behavior.
This will never be a for-sure sign because every friendship is different. He could just be the kind of guy who gives compliments freely, or he could slowly be falling in love with you. Either way, it's a good idea to pay attention and see if you can pick up on any other lingering signs.
6 Being Strung: Not Bothering To Hide His Flirtatious Side
Being a natural flirt is both a blessing and a curse. Sure, it means you'll always have people who like you and want to be around you, but it also means that your naturally flirtatious side will pop out during the worst of times—like while in a relationship.
Some guys truly can't help it and are just social butterflies. Other times, they might not bother to tone down their natural instincts because they simply don't care enough to do so. It's very telling about a partner whether they use their social skills for good or bad and, in this case, flaunting his charm is definitely not a good thing—unless he's flaunting it for you.
5 Catching Feelings: He'll Offer To Do Crazy Things Like Go Shopping With You
A guy who actually wants to be with you will make that pretty clear. His desire to spend more time with a person he has feelings for can be shown in plenty of ways, but if he suddenly decides to go shopping with you, this is definitely a point for the 'more than friends' category.
Let's be realistic for a second... most guys don't suddenly decide to indulge in uber girl-date things such as shopping, so that's already unique. If he's down for watching you model a dress for your grandmother's birthday party and then A-okay with searching for the perfect pair of heels, there's a bit more going on.
4 Being Strung: Dodgy Date Night Plans, If You Can Call Them That
When it comes to serious relationships, date nights are a legitimate thing and should be taken pretty seriously. Dating is (usually) the first step toward being exclusive and the lack of them is fairly telling. If your guy shows no interest in actual dates or commits to completely last-minute plans, that says a lot about how he views you.
It's about respect in this instance, and every woman deserves more than a last-minute plan or a shifty response when it comes to cementing plans. Don't settle for anything less than what we all deserve in the pursuit of a potential relationship.
3 Catching Feelings: He Wants To Hang Out With Your Family
We're not calling this one a swift and certain nod toward becoming more than friends, but it's a step. For all we know, a guy could just want to hang out with his best girl friend's fam because he loves being around them. But—and it's a bit 'but'—this could also mean that he truly wants to be part of your life, and not just in terms of friendship.
Getting to know your partner's family is a huge step and is the final piece in bringing everything together. Eventually, they become part of your family, too... So doing that willingly is bold and significant.
2 Being Strung: Constantly Excusing His Poor Behavior
No ladies, this isn't getting out of jury duty... it's not our job to constantly come up with reasons for why our significant other is acting so uninvolved and distant. In fact, if our partners act that way, there's no reason for us to even be wasting our time. What's the point if someone doesn't share the same feelings that we have?
Constantly making up excuses to display in front of your family and friends as to why your partner isn't there is just bad news all around. It looks bad and, more importantly, it just feels bad and is bad for us.
1 Catching Feelings: A Tiny Bit Of Jealousy Is A Good Thing
Jealously isn't the worst thing in the world. There's definitely a difference between relationship-ending jealousy and casual jealousy, and the latter is what makes us feel important. As twisted as it is, someone who's jealous of your time spent with another person is another way of implying that they wish they were there. It's them feeling as though they're missing something involving you, and it's definitely a sign they have more than just friendly feelings.
Exercise caution, though, because this could also take a turn for the worse in the long-run. Jealousy that becomes more than friendly fire is something that can bring down a relationship in a matter of minutes.