Of course, you hope that you're the best girlfriend ever and that every guy you've ever dated has been super happy with you. Who wouldn't want that, right? Since your past relationships did end, you know that maybe you had something to do with that since it takes two people to make or break something. But you hope that you weren't the worst person that your exes have ever been with.
If you're currently single, then you hope that when you do finally get into a new relationship, you've got the hang of this whole girlfriend thing. After all, if you truly care about someone and are with the right person, how hard can it be? It's never that easy since relationships can be really hard and sometimes all kinds of situations come up that you never even dreamed were possible. If you're currently someone's girlfriend, then you're probably wondering how you stack up. Are you the best girl that he's ever dated... or the worst? How do you know (besides asking him, which you might not want to do)? We've got you covered. Read on to find out 10 signs that you're a dream girl and 10 signs that you're a total nightmare!
20 Dream Girlfriend: You Talk Instead Of Arguing
There are certain times when you need to have a serious conversation with your boyfriend. Some couples just absolutely suck at communication and turn pretty much every discussion into a full-blown fight. That's definitely not the best way to go.
If you're a dream girlfriend, then you don't argue with your boyfriend (at least not on a regular basis). Instead, you make sure that the two of you sit down and talk as often as possible so you can work out the issues in your relationship before they become too big to fix. Since you know that communication is super important and that nothing needs to become such a huge deal, you're a dream to date. Your BF probably dated people before you who always yelled at him when they were upset and didn't want to talk about things. It makes a huge difference.
19 Total Nightmare: You Complain About Everything That He Does
If you complain about every single thing that your boyfriend does, then you can be super sure that you're a total nightmare of a girlfriend. Yes, even if he never tells you that and even if he's never said anything bad about you.
Maybe this is something that you've started recently so he's keeping quiet and hoping that you go back to your usual sweet self... or maybe you're both just kind of toxic together and should never have dated in the first place. It sounds harsh, sure, but it could be the truth. You shouldn't be that annoyed by things that he does, and if you are, then you should examine the relationship and whether you two truly care about each other. You don't have to love everything that he does, of course, but you shouldn't be this pissed off all the time.
18 Dream Girlfriend: You Take Care Of Him
Everyone wants to be taken care of in a relationship to a certain extent. You're a great girlfriend if you take care of your partner. No, this doesn't mean that you treat him like a baby and do absolutely everything for him. That's super creepy and definitely not the right way to go. It just means that you do little things for him, like picking up his fave beer or brand of chips on a Friday night, or you make him lunch when you know that he's not feeling that well.
This is only good if he does the same stuff for you, but as long as that's happening, you're a dream to be with. You two definitely sound like an amazing couple that is as close to perfect as possible if you take care of each other like this.
17 Total Nightmare: You Never Say Thank You
When your boyfriend cooks you dinner, does the laundry, buys you something at the grocery store that you forgot, or does absolutely anything for you, you should always say thank you. It doesn't matter if this is an errand, chore, or domestic thing that he always does. It doesn't matter if you've been together for years and so this is just the way that your relationship is set up.
If you don't say thank you, then you're not acting like you appreciate both him and the things that he does for you. And that's not good news at all. You should always want to show him how much you care about him and how grateful you are to him for what he does for you. If that's not happening, you need to ask yourself why not.
16 Dream Girlfriend: You Make Sure Things Are Equal
Society tends to think that women have to be the ones doing all the domestic stuff in a long-term relationship, from cooking to cleaning to anything else. That's not the way that it is anymore. It's 2018 and gender roles are so different from the way that they used to be. If you're in a good, happy, healthy relationship, then your boyfriend does just as much cooking and cleaning as you do. And, hopefully, if you live together, then you've worked out a good system.
But that doesn't mean that you can let him do everything. If he's the only one taking care of your apartment or house, that's just as bad as if you were the one doing it all. Making sure that things are equal makes you an awesome girlfriend. It proves that you two are really partners.
15 Total Nightmare: You Give Him The Silent Treatment Sometimes
The silent treatment is a really bad habit to get into. Whether you give your boyfriend the silent treatment sometimes or all the time doesn't matter. It's always to be pretty horrible. How would you feel if he did the same thing for you? Exactly. It doesn't feel good and it makes it seem like your partner could care less about your feelings.
If you think that acting passive aggressive is going to change his behavior or fix the relationship problems that you two have, you need to think about. It's only going to make whatever is wrong even worse and is only going to upset him even more. Even if this is your only bad habit, it's not one that your boyfriend likes or is impressed by, and it's eventually going to cause a pretty big problem.
14 Dream Girlfriend: You Text Him Sweet Nothings And Cute Emojis
Texting might get a bad reputation sometimes because people feel like you should look up from your phone and hang out with people IRL. But it's still a great way to keep in touch with your boyfriend when you're both at work or not hanging out for whatever reason.
It's pretty awesome if you're super romantic when you text him. That goes for using cute emojis, too. Even if it seems silly, you feel pretty connected to him when the two of you are texting a lot, and it can do wonders for your relationship. Seriously, your guy is super thrilled that you text him the nice things that you do. Even if he doesn't say it, you can be sure that's the honest truth.
13 Total Nightmare: You Whine About Him To Your Friends
It's tempting to whine about your partner when your best friends are always putting down the people that they're dating. You want to bond with them about how your boyfriend leaves his dirty socks and underwear on your bedroom floor all the time because, hey, their boyfriends do the same thing.
But you realize that's a pretty crappy thing to do, right? Sure, you might think that it's no big deal and it's all harmless fun, especially since your boyfriend isn't there on girls' night out and doesn't hear about it. But it's just not a good habit to get into. It's basically really mean and proves that you and your boyfriend aren't a solid team who care about each other and treat each other with love, compassion and respect, which is the way that it should be.
12 Dream Girlfriend: You Care About His Feelings
Even if you and your boyfriend have been together for a long time, you still should consider his feelings and opinions. Just because he was okay with the way that something was before doesn't mean that he is now and the same goes for you, too.
Caring about your boyfriend's feelings makes you a stand-out girlfriend. It doesn't get much better than that. If you make it a point to check in with him regularly and see how he's doing both in his life and in your relationship, you get major points. He definitely appreciates that you care so much about him, even if he's a man of few words and doesn't get super mushy and say it that often. Just ask him and you'll probably hear him say that you're on the right track.
11 Total Nightmare: You Embarrass Him In Front Of Other People
This is a truly terrible thing to do. If this is what you do on a regular basis, or even just from time to time, then you're not a dream girlfriend at all but a total and complete nightmare.
This shows such a lack of respect for your partner, it's not even funny. You might think that it's all in fun because you're laughing at his refusal to work out or eat healthily or whatever else, but honestly, don't you realize how much this hurts his feelings? You wouldn't like it if he did the same thing to you. You have to be a solid team and know that you two are a united front and really care about each other. Teasing and humiliating him can't be a part of that.
10 Dream Girlfriend: You Tell Him How Great He Is On A Regular Basis
Everyone wants to be praised sometimes, and you can probably relate to that. Even though you know that your best friends and family members and co-workers aren't going to constantly heap compliments on you, it would be nice if they did. At the very least, you want to hear some nice things from your boyfriend on a regular basis.
The same goes for your boyfriend. He definitely wants to hear how you feel about him. If you tell him how great he is on a regular basis, you can be super confident that he's very happy with you. You don't need to go over-the-top and make it sound like he's a King or a god or anything (that's way too much) so as long as you make sure it's genuine, this is a great thing to do.
9 Total Nightmare: You Don't Want Him To See His Friends
It's amazing to have such a great relationship that you and your boyfriend want to spend all of your time together. Cooking dinner together on weeknights, binge-watching TV shows, grabbing brunch and hanging out on weekends -- it's the best. This is why people love being in a relationship. There's a certain comfort level.
It's toxic if you never see your friends... and if you don't want your boyfriend to see his pals, either. You absolutely can't tell him that he can never see his friends. And you really can't complain when he makes social plans. It's healthy to have some time outside of the relationship, and if you're not interested in that, then you're definitely a total nightmare. It's only a matter of time before this ends your relationship.
8 Dream Girlfriend: You Watch What He Wants Sometimes
Sure, it would be awesome if your boyfriend wanted to watch Pretty Little Liars and The Real Housewives. Chances are that's not happening, though, so the two of you have to work out a system for your TV time. Hopefully you have some TV shows in common so you can watch the same things most of the time, but of course from time to time, one of you gets to pick the TV show or movie.
If you watch what he wants sometimes (yup, even if it's an action movie or just a TV show that doesn't interest you), then you can be sure that you're a dream girlfriend. Even though it seems like this doesn't matter because it's just about television, it's a pretty big deal. This proves that you can be selfless sometimes, and that's a big thing in a relationship.
7 Total Nightmare: You Give Him Ultimatums
Ultimatums are never, ever a good thing. They might feel super useful because you can turn to your boyfriend and say, "Stop doing this thing/start doing that thing or I'll dump you" and when he does whatever you want, you can smile smugly. But... you can probably tell that's a pretty crappy way to behave.
The truth is that if you're in a good, solid relationship, then ultimatums are never something that you have to even entertain or think about. You can't force someone to do what you want or be the kind of partner that you want them to be. They either are or they aren't, and the sooner that you realize that the easier your relationship is going to be. And the happier you'll be for sure.
6 Dream Girlfriend: You Spend Time With His Family Because You Want To
It sucks if you don't like your boyfriend's family and don't want to see them very often, but even if they're the worst people ever, you probably still have to see them sometimes. Holidays are a pretty big deal for most families, along with other special occasions like birthdays and big get-togethers, and it looks pretty bad if you and your BF aren't there. Hopefully, you like them and they like you, too.
If you tell your boyfriend that you love spending time with his family and actually suggest that the two of you visit him mom some weekends or see the rest of his relatives, that's a really big deal. You might shrug and say that it's just what you're supposed to do as his girlfriend, but a lot of people wouldn't put themselves out like that.
5 Total Nightmare: You Insist That Everything Be On Your Terms
Yup, you're a total nightmare if you do this, too. You really can't expect someone to just go along with whatever you say and whatever you want, can you? Well, if you can relate to this, then apparently you can.
Whether you're always picking the movies that you and your boyfriend watch on a Saturday night or even the pizza toppings when you order takeout to watch said movie with, it's still a massive problem. You have to let your partner have an equal say in the relationship... yes, even if it's about something like what to put on the pizza that you're about to order. Otherwise, it's all on your terms, and it's simply unfair. Your boyfriend is going to feel like you don't care about him at all.
4 Dream Girlfriend: You Tell Him To See His Friends More Often
When you're in a serious relationship, it makes sense that you see your partner more often than you see your friends. It's even tougher to find time to get together if your besties have boyfriends as well. It's just the way that it goes, along with the responsibilities of life and work and everything else.
You're a dream girlfriend if you always suggest to your boyfriend that he see his friends more often. He'll probably be pretty shocked the first few times that you do this since he's probably dated people who never wanted him to spend time with anyone but them. You just want him to be happy and you know that having a social life is a big part of that for sure.
3 Total Nightmare: You Don't Do Little Things For Him
Little things are what really sustain a relationship. They're also the most romantic things ever. Chances are, even if your boyfriend is the dreamiest, best guy ever, he's not going to surprise you with flowers and cake and chocolate on a daily basis. He probably shouldn't do that, either (so expensive... and so much sugar, too).
If you never do little things for your boyfriend, you can be sure that he notices. Yes, even if he doesn't specifically tell you. This is even more obvious to him if he always picks up your favorite foods when he does a grocery shop or if he always remembers your coffee order. It has to go both ways because that's the only way to make your love last.
2 Dream Girlfriend: You Support Him No Matter What
When your boyfriend is applying for jobs and wants to make a big career change, or has the worst cold that he's ever had, or is dealing with some friend or family drama, you need to be the person who is always there for him. You have to be his number one support system no matter what's happening.
If that always describes you, then congrats, you're the best girlfriend that he could possibly have. Hopefully, he tells you that because it's always nice to hear that. But whether or not he's made it super obvious, you can pat yourself on the back and know that you're his biggest support, and that's the way that it's supposed to be. Otherwise, why even bother being in a relationship in the first place?!
1 Total Nightmare: You Start Fights All The Time
No one wants to date someone who really enjoys starting fights. Simply put, it's totally exhausting. And it makes you feel like you're always walking on shaky ground, unsure when your partner is going to flip out and complain about something that you don't even think is a problem.
If this is you, then you can be sure that you're a total nightmare of a girlfriend. It's definitely time to ask yourself why you're starting fights with your boyfriend all the time. If you really feel like he's messing up and not being a good BF, then you should have a real, actual, honest conversation with him instead of just arguing with him all the time. That's a better, more useful and productive way of dealing with things.