We’ve all heard the story that nice guys finish last and girls want to date a bad guy. Why are we more attracted to bad guys than nice guys? For starters — nice guys are too eager to please, so they come off desperate. They’re also patient to a fault. They wait around for weeks before they finally get the courage to ask you out. Nice guys do everything by the book: listen to your problems, do everything you ask for, etc. Basically, they come off as friends, but they whine and complain about being “friend-zoned.” They don’t understand why you don’t like them romantically when they’ve been nothing but nice to you.
Bad guys are emotionally unavailable, and we love the chase. You know what they say — “We want what we can’t have.” Another reason for wanting to date a bad guy is because you see him as a challenge — a project. You want to be the one to change him. Overall, bad guys have the reputation of being good-looking and confident. They’re irresistible because of the way they carry themselves. They effortlessly exude confidence with their masculinity. They’re also mysterious and unpredictable.
The list below shows why we’re more attracted to bad guys than nice guys.
15. Nice Guys Are Too Eager To Please So They Come Off Desperate
We like it when guys agree to do what we want, but it doesn’t mean we want a “yes man.” It’s unattractive when all he does is nods and accommodates you. He’d even drop his plans for you because he wants to make you happy. It’s cowardly when he never speaks his mind and doesn’t stand up for himself when you’re mean to him. He fears too much you might not like him if he says one thing wrong. Sometimes, we want a guy to be real with us even if the truth may hurt, but that’s never the case with nice guys. They ask for your permission on every little thing. They’re big on “is it okay” questions. They seek your approval all the time. They’re too eager to please, so they come off desperate.
14. Nice Guys Take Their Sweet Time Making The First Move On Everything
Nice guys are patient to a fault. When they like someone, they take their sweet time making the first move on everything. He spends weeks or even months to see if you like him back. He observes your every move to make sure he gets all of your hints. After a long while, he gets the courage to confess his feelings to you, but he backs out at the very last minute. It happens for a couple more times that he might never get around to it, and you end up dating someone else. Even if he were to get through the confessing part, he hesitates to make the next move whether it’s to hold your hands or kiss you. It’s sweet and cute at first, but it gets exhausting if he keeps you waiting all the time.
13. Nice Guys Make Romantic Gestures That Are Quite Sappy & Cheesy
Romantic gestures in movies give unrealistic expectations of romance. Nice guys need to stop watching rom-coms as a reference to make us fall head over heels for them. Some of the scenes from the movies are quite sappy and cheesy like in Say Anything when John Cusack played “In Your Eyes” on his boombox over his head outside his ex-girlfriend’s window to win her back. Another scenario is when Heath Ledger serenaded Julia Stiles with “Can’t Take My Eyes Off Of You” in 10 Things I Hate About You. We probably swooned during the scene, but we wouldn’t want that in real life. They come on too strong, and it’s burdensome especially when they’re professing their love publicly. Moving on — nice guys also try to buy your affection with flowers and lavish gifts.
12. Nice Guys Feel The Need To Convince You How Nice They Are
Self-proclaimed nice guys are a problem. They feel the need to convince you how nice they are and if they need to do that, then chances are they’re probably not even that nice. Anyways — you’ve probably met guys who told you, “I’m a nice guy.” He tells you stories of all the good deeds he did — the time he did someone a favor and made that person’s day or when he donated money to such and such charity — so that you’d believe him. He also tells you he’d do everything and anything for you if you were to date him because he’s not like the other guys. Okay. It gets annoying when guys constantly label themselves as the nice guys. Real nice guys would show you that they’re nice through their actions and not with their mouths.
11. Nice Guys Shower You With Too Many Compliments On Your Looks
Nice guys shower you with too many compliments on your appearance, and it makes you feel uncomfortable. He can’t take his eyes off of you. He tells you he’s never seen anyone more beautiful and gorgeous than you. He can’t stop telling you, “You’re really really pretty,” every chance he gets. He says you have the prettiest smile and how he can stare into your beautiful eyes all day. He lets you know that he can’t believe you’re talking to him because you’re out of his league or something silly. It’s all too much. Overall, it shows that he’s insecure and that’s never attractive. We prefer guys to be confident and who can also compliment us on our personality traits like our sense of humor.
10. Nice Guys Can Be Downright Creepy When They Call And Text You Nonstop
No one wants to date someone who’s clingy, and nice guys can be clingy. He’d text and call you everyday because he doesn’t want you to think he’s not interested in you anymore. He just wants to talk to you like know what you’re doing, if you have any plans for the weekend, and so on. When you don’t respond to his texts or call him back within a timeframe, he might bombard your inbox with good intentions. He’s worried something might’ve happened to you. Either way, you might feel trapped and smothered. You want space, but he won’t give it to you. Why don’t nice guys get the hint? They don’t give you the opportunity to miss them because they’re always around. Also, they can be downright creepy when they call and text you nonstop.
9. Nice Guys Act Like A Doormat When They Put You On A Pedestal
Nice guys don’t ask for anything. All they do is give, and they let you walk all over them. No one respects a doormat, and he acts like one when he puts you on a pedestal. He says he agrees with everything you say even if he might not. He’d go out of his ways to do things for you. He’d drive forty minutes to a bakery to get you your favorite cake. He thinks giving you the power would make you happy and you’d want to date him, but for some of us, we like it when guys often take charge and lead us in the relationship. Putting us on a pedestal makes us feel like we need to be this perfect ideal girl, and they don’t see us for who we really are.
8. Nice Guys Literally Apologize For Everything They Do
Nice guys are overly apologetic. They apologize for literally everything because they fear that you might not want to be around them anymore. They just don’t want to come off mean because they’re nice guys. They need to relax. Not everything is their fault. Some actions warrant an apology like when he steps on your feet or when he bumps into you hard that you almost fell. He should’t have to apologize when the cafe he took you to doesn’t have your favorite drink, or the bookstore doesn’t have the book you wanted. It’s not his fault. We don’t want to date a guy who’s sorry about every little thing that goes wrong. Otherwise, we’d hear about his sorry’s all day and night. He should just laugh it off and get over it. It’s not that serious.
7. Nice Guys Think You Owe Them Something For Being Nice To You
We absolutely don’t owe nice guys anything for being nice to us. Even if we asked them for a favor, they could’ve declined. It’s wrong if they automatically assumed we owed them one. While we appreciate their kindness, they’re not entitled to get whatever they want. He can’t expect you to go on a date with him because he’s been nothing but nice to you. No, it’s not how it works. He’s being nice for the wrong reasons then. He shouldn’t expect you to reciprocate his feelings based on how nice he is, either. What’s worse is when he tries to guilt trip you. He mentions the time he picked you up late at night at a party, and if it were some other guy, he would’ve made a move on you. Still, he doesn’t get credit for doing the right thing.
6. Nice Guys Whine And Complain About Being “Friend-Zoned”
Nice guys whine and complain about being friend-zoned. They don’t understand why they were put there because they’re nice guys, and every girl wants to date a nice guy. They also get angry at you for not liking them in a romantic way after all that they’ve done for you. They then automatically think it’s because you prefer jerks. Okay — they can’t put all the blame on us. Sometimes he puts himself in the friend-zone by always lending a hand but never letting you know how he feels about you until it was a little too late. He probably thought it was logical to get into a relationship by being friends first. But for some of us, if anything were to happen, it would’ve happened before friendship was formed. Overall, nice guys think it’s unfair when they get friend-zoned.
5. Bad Guys Effortlessly Exude Confidence With Their Masculinity
We find bad guys irresistible. They effortlessly exude confidence with their masculinity. You can tell from the way they carry themselves. They don’t slouch or look down when they walk. They don’t care what anyone thinks of them. They only care what they think of themselves. Honestly — when we think of bad guys, we think of studs. It makes sense because bad guys have a reputation of being good-looking and confident. They’re not insecure like nice guys at all. Because their confidence comes from the inside, it makes them even more attractive on the outside. Also, bad guys are charming. They know what to say and how to make you laugh. One of the greatest things about dating a bad guy is that if anyone were to mess with you, he has your back.
4. Bad Guys Are A Challenge — You Want To Be The One To Change Them
Dating bad guys is a challenge. They don’t give you the attention nice guys do, but that’s what makes it more exciting. We love the chase. Like people say — “We want what we can’t have.” You want to make him fall in love with you. You want to be the one to change him. Some speculate the reason behind bad guys being bad is because they’re apparently broken. It’s why a lot of us want to “fix them.” Okay — we all know it’s not as easy as movies make it seem, like in John Tucker Must Die. It was a success for Kate when she tried to change John Tucker, but let’s be real. It’s unlikely for bad guys to change in real life. It’s possible, but don’t get your hopes up and don’t get too disappointed when it doesn’t work.
3. Bad Guys Keep You On Your Toes By Being Mysterious & Unpredictable
Bad guys are wildcards. You never know what you’re going to get with them. They keep you on your toes by being mysterious and unpredictable. One day, you’re out to dinner and movies. Next day, you’re out skydiving. He’s adventurous. He wants to do things like water rafting, camping, and anything that’s a bit out of your comfort zone. He takes you out on a motorcycle ride instead of the usual car rides. You never get bored with him. Also — when he’s mysterious, you want to know more about him. When he’s unpredictable, you never know when he’s going to contact you, and you look forward to that day. You can’t help but think if he’d call you today or tomorrow. He gives you time to miss him. When he does call you, you get excited.
2. Bad Guys Are Honest And They Don’t Pretend To Be Someone They’re Not
All relationships are based on trust, and everyone wants honesty from their partners. You don’t have to worry about that when you’re dating a bad guy. Bad guys are honest, and they don’t pretend to be someone they’re not. They’d call you out on your BS, and sometimes we want that. We don’t want a guy to agree on everything we say and do like nice guys. We want a guy to challenge us, which is why we’re more drawn to bad guys who speak their mind. When they don’t like something, they say it. They don’t care if they’ve said something wrong, either. They don’t hold anything back. Most importantly, you never have to wonder where you stand with a bad guy. If he just wanted to date, then he’d let you know he’s not looking for anything serious.
1. Bad Guys Know What They Want And They Go After It
Bad guys know what they want, and they go for it. When they like you, they don’t hesitate to make the first move. They’d confess to you and ask you out on a date. They don’t sit around and think about what to do for weeks. They don’t waste any time. Nice guys fear of being rejected or judged, but that’s not the case with bad guys. Basically, they just go for it and deal with the consequences later. If you’re not interested in them, then there are no hard feelings. If you were on a date with a bad guy, he’d read all the signs and hold your hands or kiss you when appropriate. He doesn’t ask you, “Is it okay If I kiss you?” If anything — he’d say, “I really want to kiss you.”
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