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15 Subtle Signs You’re About To Get Dumped

in Relationships
15 Subtle Signs You’re About To Get Dumped

Here is an unfortunate truth: relationships end. Sometimes it is a mutual decision, and sometimes it is just one party who wants it to end. There is very little pain that comes close to the pain of a break-up. The pain of rejection and abandonment is even worse. I know you don’t even want to fathom the thought of your significant other walking away. I am in no way saying that if your partner is doing these things, that they are definitely breaking up with you. Rather, there are serious issues in your relationship that can or cannot be fixed. Regardless of which one it is, wouldn’t you want to be ready for a break-up if it does come? It will make the blow a little less severe. Trust me, it is better to be prepared than the contrary. Below is a list of 15 subtle signs that you may be single sooner than later.

15. They stop saying “I love you” on a regular basis

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These three words are so important no matter what stage of the relationship. Frankly, it shouldn’t matter whether you two are three months or three years deep, it should always be expressed daily. Yes, DAILY. Unless you guys are not at the “I love you stage” yet, you deserve to hear it that often. If your S/O has been a little emotionally neglectful lately, your antenna should go up. When you are in love you can’t say it enough! You want that person to know how much you adore them constantly. You shower them with affection without leaving them for a second questioning how you feel. When your partner isn’t doing this, make no mistake – there is a serious reason why. They very well may be out the door and onto the next shortly. But hey, don’t shoot the messenger! If you don’t receive those words of affirmation from your partner, be a little concerned.

14. They are withdrawn

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Have you ever talked to someone who, although they are physically present… their mind seems elsewhere? When someone is about to end a relationship, this is constant. It feels like they are never listening. If anything, it seems that they are merely pretending to listen. They are aloof, distant, and cold. They no longer have the desire to maintain any kind of emotional or intellectual connection with you. One way to figure out whether your significant other is in this realm of thinking is to watch their eye contact. Do they maintain it, or are they looking down at their phone? Are their eyes just glossed over, or looking at the TV when you are trying to tell them about your day? These are never good signs. Listening and understanding each other is key in order to maintain a healthy relationship. When your partner is no longer interested in you and your life, that is when you need to start to seriously worry.

13. They ramp up their appearance, out of nowhere

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If your boyfriend/girlfriend suddenly starts hitting the gym or wearing nicer attire, either they are trying to be the best version of themselves for you… or preparing for the single life. Unfortunately, it is typically the latter. If they have been talking about it for a while that they need new clothes or they want to get a personal trainer, I wouldn’t be as concerned. They may just be taking those steps. However, if they are all of a sudden lifting weights 6 days a week and they go from wearing sweatpants to designer jeans every day out of the blue, you need to start asking yourself why. They know that you love them no matter what they wear, so why all of a sudden do they feel the need to be on their A game at all times? It could mean that they are trying to find new admirers and options. Be aware if this happens.

12. You stopped hanging out their friends completely

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In a relationship, your lives tend to intertwine. Your friends become their friends and vice versa. If you haven’t seen their group of friends in a while, it should be a red flag. All of a sudden, they want more and more alone time with their friends and they include you less and less. It may be their way of creating distance between you and their friends in order for them to have an easy and smooth transition into the single life. Everyone knows that if you have the same friends the relationship is significantly more difficult to end. You are constantly seeing that person no matter where you go and there is really no avoiding running into them because you are in the same circle. When someone is gearing up to dump you, they won’t want you around. It should be equally as bizarre if your partner is all of a sudden making new friends that they have not even attempted to introduce you to.

11. All of your future plans have come to a halt

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If you two were planning on moving in together, they will suddenly find an excuse as to why they need to hold off on it. If there was a vacation planned, it will be postponed until further notice. Someone who wants to cut you out of their lives is quite obviously not going to want to make future plans with you. They want to get out of the commitment ASAP, not make more. Of course, life gets in the way and there are tons of normal reasons as to why arrangements have to be canceled. However, if they are giving you excuse after excuse about why they can’t make any type of plan beyond like… the next week, that is a problem. When they are in it for the long haul, they will have no issue booking a concert together six months in advance, or making plans for a big road trip in a year. That is how you know you have nothing to worry about. Any other wishy-washy BS is just that… BS.

10. They no longer make an effort to appease to you

The date nights have ended. The romance is gone. The most thoughtful thing they do for you is take out the trash. Forget the flowers, candy, and gifts. When a person is about to end their relationship, the effort, time, and money is nothing but a waste for them. It is very sad, but also very true. When they stop doing the little things that they know make you happy – you need to start asking yourself why. They usually religiously take you to your favorite restaurant once a week, but now they have meetings that keep them past dinner time. They used to stop by your favorite bakery on the way home from work, but now they just keep forgetting. Think about it: would you be putting the work into a relationship you know is about to fail? I highly doubt it. It just doesn’t make sense. Be cautious of the person who doesn’t give a sh*t whether you are wooed or not.

9. They could care less if you two make up after a fight

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There is no avoiding fighting in a relationship: it is inevitable. What is not normal is when your partner stops caring to resolve anything. Two good friends of mine shared a way that they maintain a happy marriage: something that they call the shot chair. They both took a shot of tequila and a time out during a heated argument. Before they knew it, they were both laughing and over the fight. Side note: they are goals. That takes an effort from both sides. If your S/O has no intention of kissing and making up with you, it is because they just don’t care! They know that they are about to break things off, so having a discussion with you on how to move on from a disagreement is just not on their agenda. More likely than not, they will leave you high and dry rather than work things out.

8. They suddenly start following tons of random girls/guys on the gram

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It should be worrisome to you if you’re noticing your bae following people of the opposite gender suddenly and abruptly – ESPECIALLY if they’re all good looking. Who are these people and why do they feel the need to start following them all out of the blue? I am not one to pick fights over social media BS, but this is something to think about. This is a clear indication that they are starting to look elsewhere for potential mates. There is really no other explanation for it. Another clue is when the likes from randoms from his page start to pour in. If he/she is participating in the “like for like” situation, there is something to be said about that. Comments from these people about how good looking your S/O is? Even worse. I don’t want you to jump to conclusions, but definitely keep an eye on their behavior on their social media pages

7. They are more secretive than usual

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They leave the room for phone calls. They are texting under the table discreetly. What is there to hide? A faithful, devoted partner doesn’t feel the need to conceal what they are doing on their phone from their other half. There are definitely some things to be left private in a relationship, sure, but repeated behavior like this is not healthy. Beware of the shady semantics. They may also justify acting like this because they know they are about to break up with you and they no longer feel the need to tell or share anything with you. Or, they may be texting someone new… which is absolutely devastating. if you catch them doing that, you should leave their a$$.

6. Being intimate is long gone

It is not abnormal for couples to go on dry spells. It is a pretty bad sign when you are attempting to connect with your partner in a physical way and they are constantly unresponsive. They may feel guilty for continuing to sleep with you when they know that they are about to end the relationship, or they are just no longer attracted to you in general. It happens, but don’t beat yourself up about that. They will make excuses like the classic “I’m too tired” or “I don’t have time right now” to push you away. Again, of course, those are valid excuses but only once in a while. Normal dry spells in a relationship are usually coming from both sides. Life can definitely get in the way. However, if you are turning up the seduction in the bedroom and putting on sexy lingerie for your partner and they could care less, there is a huge issue.

5. They are no longer there for, mentally or physically

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They’re usually your biggest supporter, but lately, they are nowhere to be found when you need them. You have a flat tire and usually it is a no brainer that they will come and help you. But as of late, they won’t answer the phone during critical situations such as these. if you don’t have support from them, what do you have? A relationship is a partnership, and partners have each other’s backs throughout everything. If they are not there for you in a dire situation, it is time to reconsider where their head is at. They may be getting ready to no longer be your crutch in life. They may even believe that they are doing you a favor because this will begin to help you feel comfortable doing things on your own. I’m not saying it’s right, I’m just playing devil’s advocate here. This can give you some solace and prepare yourself to move on if a break up conversation does arise.

4. The text and phone calls are dwindling

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They don’t answer the phone right away, if at all. You may have noticed that you stopped hearing from them less and less. They throw out at excuses about it, but you are sensing that something else is up. You used to text and call during work hours whenever the two of you got the opportunity, but now the conversations are bleak and scarce. All of a sudden, they had meetings all day and couldn’t text you back, or they just weren’t near their phone. If they aren’t big on the phone normally, then this shouldn’t be alarming to you. However, someone trying to end a relationship will slowly detach themselves from you and that includes even the simplest of text conversation. It is their own way of beginning the painful process of saying goodbye. I never said that this was easy for them either! Break ups are the worst for both parties.

3. They are suddenly critical of the relationship

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Long gone are the days where they would express how lucky they felt to have you and to be in this relationship. Conversely, all of a sudden, the relationship is burdensome and an annoyance. They will start to emphasize the flaws, how “different” the two of you really are, and even throw out terms like “toxic” and “unhealthy”. They may be picking fights over the most minuscule of situations. Where is this even coming from? That is a serious question that you need to ask yourself. They may be trying to shift blame on you or the relationship when they walk away. This can happen even when the relationship is not toxic nor unhealthy. In fact, it is probably the opposite. They just want an excuse, a way out. It is a pretty cowardly move. This tactic is also extremely manipulative and unfair. Despite the immorality, unfortunately, it happens more often than not.

2. They point out their own flaws, constantly

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They constantly say that you’d be better off without them, or that you’re too good for them. Everyone knows these classic lines. Why do that? They would rather have you walk away then have to break things off things off themselves. Surprisingly, I would argue that it is easier to be dumped than be the dumpee in the long run. Although I am in no way saying that it doesn’t hurt to be walked away from – it sucks. Despite this, being the dumpee takes some serious self-control to walk away forever… Especially in modern times, it seems that we can’t escape each other with social media tracking everyone’s every move. When you are the one who is ending the relationship, you know and understand the responsibility that comes with it: you have to stay out of the other persons’ life. Unless of course, you are a total socio who gets enjoyment out of playing mind games. Be careful if they start to use this kind of language.

1. Your intuition tells you so

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We are discrediting our intuition all too often. You sense something is wrong, but you can’t quite put your finger on it. You feel crazy because of these feelings that you can’t explain. Trust yourself enough to trust that that gut feeling is correct. Personally, my intuition has never failed me. On top of feeling a tad insane, it is quite difficult to face the music that your relationship may be in turmoil. It is easier to be in denial – ignorance is bliss. Unfortunately, that bubble will burst sooner than later. If you are sensing anything you should be allowed to express this to your partner. They may confess, and they may not. These problems can very well be worked out! Maybe, just maybe, they are waiting for you to make the first move so you two can begin to mend your relationship. It is possible that they feel neglected in their own way, or something is seriously bothering them and they don’t know how to express it.

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