You definitely love being a woman, but you have to admit that sometimes, things can get pretty frustrating and annoying. From bodily functions to hair growing in places that you really don’t want it to grow, from dating to figuring out what to eat, you have to make so many choices on a daily basis that you really don’t feel like making. What’s more, they are uniquely female decisions. Your boyfriend doesn’t have to deal with headaches and cramps and wondering if he should put down the potato chips and pick up some carrots and celery sticks instead. Sigh. Sure, you totally get that guys have to deal with a lot of annoying things too, from wondering if they should ask their crush out or if they’re going to get rejected, to wondering if they seem “macho” enough or good enough. At the end of the day, everyone is human and everyone deals with the same negative emotions and insecurities. But you kind of have to admit that being a woman means dealing with certain things that guys just would never understand. And yes, things get awkward AF sometimes.
Here are the 14 most awkward things about being female.
14. That Time Of The Month
There are so many terms for your period, which just proves how much you hate this. Time of the month. Aunt Flow. Crimson Wave (and yes, that last term should totally make you think of Clueless). You can’t believe how awkward getting your period every single month still is. Sure, you may have had this happen to you twelve times a year since you were a pre-teen. You should be used to it by now, right? Unfortunately, you totally aren’t. Whether you want to use pads or tampons is totally up to you, but there are awkward parts of each. When you wear pads, you have to constantly wonder if they show through when you’re wearing your BFF leggings or super tight jeans. When you wear tampons, you have to make sure you don’t keep them in too long or things can get dangerous and fast. You also have to deal with cramps and an upset stomach and headaches. It’s just awkward and pretty awful.
13. Making The First Move
You don’t want to be super traditional and wait around for your crush to ask you out. You think that’s pretty lame. It’s 2017, after all. You don’t need to conform to standard gender roles and you don’t need to always do what society expects from you. So sometimes, you make the first move. But that doesn’t mean it’s not awkward because it definitely is. Making the first move is a uniquely awkward female experience. You wonder if you’re going to get rejected (just like guys do when they ask girls out) and if this particular guy is going to wonder why you didn’t just wait for him to do it. You wonder if you’re putting too much pressure on yourself — does this mean that you now have to do absolutely everything if you enter into a relationship with this person? You hope not. You hope that things will still be equal. Then you start overthinking and soon you’re in this huge spiral and you can’t stop worrying.
Oh, shaving. You love it and you loathe it because let’s face it, you can’t really get away with not doing it. You have to shave your legs and your underarms at the very least but sometimes, you shave your arms too (shhh… well, the secret’s out now). You just hate how awkward this whole thing is. You hate that you always have hair in places that you would rather hair not be and that you have to constantly check your legs to make sure that it’s not time to shave again. There’s literally nothing worse than being in the middle of a yoga or barre class and then looking down and realizing that the bottom of your legs are showing through your capri leggings… and, oops, you see some hair there. Sometimes you just can’t shave every little tiny hair and that definitely drives you absolutely bonkers. Sure, you could get your legs waxed professionally or do it yourself, but OMG does that hurt. No thank you.
It’s not that you have to diet. You totally get that being on a diet is not always the healthiest thing and that telling yourself what you shouldn’t eat usually backfires. There you are, swearing that you’re going to live on salad and kale and spinach and turkey burgers… and then you find yourself face-planting into a pint of mint chocolate chip ice cream. Oops. It’s totally okay to love your body the way that it is and not worry about counting every single calorie that you put into your mouth. In fact, that’s going to make you much happier and healthier in the long term and is a better recipe for success. But you can’t eat french fries every time that you crave them. Sometimes you do have to go for the veggies and the lean protein and the carbs. You have to look after your health and that can mean prioritizing this stuff over junk food. That’s definitely not something that guys worry about, that’s for sure.
10. Friend Fights
Guys do not fight with their friends. They honestly and truly do not. If they get into a disagreement, then they pretty much make up almost immediately after. They do not hold these crazy grudges that you and your friends do and they definitely do not get into screaming matches or text message wars. That is just not something that happens between guys. Sometimes things do get a bit physical but even so, they can forgive and forget ASAP. You can’t imagine doing that. Instead, you and your friends get into arguments big and small sometimes, and you don’t know what to do to stop it. You just can’t imagine agreeing with everything that your friends say and do, and hey, you believe that being a good BFF means letting them know what they are doing wrong. It’s all kinds of awkward and it can really ruin some good times.
9. Bodily Functions
It’s become a bit of a cliche or stereotype that this point that you don’t feel like you can let one rip in front of your boyfriend or even let him know that you get upset stomachs sometimes. It’s like you’re terrified that he’s going to freak out and dump you on the spot if he realizes that you have weird and gross bodily functions just like he does. The truth, of course, is that you’re only human and these things definitely happen to you. But for whatever reason, it feels even more awkward when you’re a girl and these things happen. It’s almost like you think you have to apologize for this, like women aren’t supposed to fart or have stomachaches. Come on. It’s so ridiculous. And you know that it’s ridiculous and yet you still feel tons of shame and guilt over this. Oh well. At least you don’t feel proud of your farts like some people (your brother and your boyfriend…).
8. Being Domestic
You know that traditionally, being a woman/a girlfriend/a wife means cooking and cleaning. You want to make things nice for the guy in your life and you want to make sure that your place is clean and dinner is in the oven and cookies are cooling on the counter. But since you’re a modern woman, all that domestic stuff kind of makes you feel sick. You can’t believe that women are still expected to do all this and you definitely want to be in a relationship or even a marriage that is a whole lot more equal. You don’t think that people have fought for equality for you to be super domestic today and forget about all that history. So every time you clean your kitchen or bathroom or even step foot in your kitchen, you feel kind of awkward about it. You don’t want your boyfriend to think that you’re cooking dinner for him because you’re female and that’s what you’re supposed to do. You don’t want him to expect this. You’re just doing something nice.
7. Being Organized
It sucks that it has become really “female” to be a planner. But somehow, it is. It is just expected that when you are the girl in the relationship, you are going to plan everything and anything. Whether you are thinking about what restaurant to go to for dinner or are planning a vacation, you are the one who ends up making the actual plans and figuring everything out. It’s kind of annoying… and it’s definitely awkward. It’s all kinds of awkward. You hate being organized because you feel like your boyfriend thinks you’re being annoying or like you always have to be in control of everything. You’re definitely not that awful and you can definitely let him do some planning sometimes. But when you suggest anything or make a more formal plan, you feel pretty awkward about it because you feel like you’re being an annoying female. It’s just a weird thing.
6. Crazy Emotions
Sometimes, a girl just has to be emotional… and sometimes, a girl just has to be crazy emotional. You can’t help it. There’s that time of the month (guilty) and, oh yeah, Love Actually (guilty again). But it’s awkward to be a woman with strong emotions because they can get you in a lot of trouble. Your emotions can embarrass you when you’re on a crowded subway car on your way to the office in the morning or you’re even talking to your boss and you randomly remember a sad scene from The Notebook and almost start bawling. You end up crying or being on the verge of tears when you have any kind of serious conversation with your boyfriend and that’s definitely not very useful since it makes him think that something is wrong even when everything is totally fine. Yup, you hate your emotions and they make life pretty awkward.
5. Having Frenemies
You know the ones. You used to be friends with them. Maybe you were even best friends with them. Or maybe you’ve always secretly hated them but you have to see them all the time because they work out at your gym, or they’re close with your best friend, or they’re dating your boyfriend’s friend. Maybe you even work with them (and that’s honestly the worst). It’s really awkward to be female and have a frenemy or two because you have to become super annoying and say hi to them and be nice even when you don’t want to be. You become that really awful superficial person who smiles and plays nice but talks about them behind their backs. It’s like you’re on your own reality television show or something. It’s really stressful and awkward and you hate it, but you’re not sure what else to do. It’s not like you’re going to be outwardly mean and this person just always shows up.
4. Sucking Up
Sometimes you suck up to people to get what you want. You hate this about yourself and you’re definitely not proud of it. You’re basically the opposite of proud. But lots of women understand the total awkwardness of sucking up to people. It can be really necessary. You use your feminine ways to get your boyfriend to go on the vacation of your dreams. You compliment that girl at your yoga studio so she will be nice to you and stop competing with you over your lunges and downward dogs. Again, you’re not proud. You’re ashamed and feel guilty every single time that you do this. But you’re not sure what else to do. You feel awkward about how much you kiss people’s butts because you know it’s not the best thing to do. You hate how effective and useful it is. If it didn’t work, you would stop, but hey, it’s not your fault that it works like a charm every single time.
3. Looking Good
Another part of female life that is crazy awkward? That would be looking good on a daily basis. You feel all kinds of pressure to look as good as you possibly can. This means everything and anything from exercising a few times a week to eating clean to drinking enough water to doing your hair and make-up. You hate that you feel like you need to look pretty. You want to be more evolved than that and you want to act like you don’t care what you look like or what people think about you and your appearance. Unfortunately, that’s not realistic and you really do care. You can’t help it. You want people to think that you take care of yourself and this is just something that is really important to you. But it’s still awkward to care about straightening your hair and doing your makeup and wearing pretty clothes because you know that as a woman, you should care about more. It’s a constant battle.
2. Being A Sports Fan
What is it about being female that makes people think that you shouldn’t watch sports, let alone play them? You hate this super sexist double standard and it’s definitely not something that you want to pay attention to. If you’re a sports fan, you’re one no matter what other people think… but that doesn’t mean that you don’t feel all kinds of awkward and annoyed about it. You wish that people (some guys in particular) would realize that there’s nothing wrong with being a woman and loving sports. You might have grown up watching baseball or basketball or hockey with your dad or maybe you even played soccer with your brothers. You might have even been on a team in elementary or high school. And you never, ever even thought about your gender and you definitely didn’t think that it had anything to do with what you were doing. Then you grew up and realized that sports are a stereotypically male thing. Ugh.
1. Cheesy Romance
The truth is that no matter how cynical and cool you try to be, you love romance. And the cheesier, the better. You’re a hopeless romantic at your core and there’s nothing you can do about it. But that doesn’t mean that this isn’t another reason that your life as a woman is awkward AF most of the time. You don’t want your boyfriend (or society) to think that you’re a damsel in distress who always expects red roses and expensive gifts and pricey dinners out at fancy restaurants. You definitely don’t care about those things and you don’t need them on a regular basis, either. You get that your BF loves you and that it’s the little things that count. But… well, you can’t help it. You love romance. You want him to be a bit romantic sometimes. And that makes it awkward since he’s never sure if you’re going to be insulted when it seems like he’s treating you like a stereotypical girlfriend or if you’re going to be impressed that he put in the effort. Yup, it’s a double standard and yup, you can kind of be a hypocrite sometimes. Oh well…